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Ending a friendship

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By *stella OP   Woman  over a year ago

London

Have you ever had to let a friendship go? Like make a purposeful decision that the relationship is done now and step away? Do you tell the other person or let it fizzle?

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan  over a year ago

Aylesbury

The vast majority of them. I let them fizzle

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I haven’t HAD to end a friendship but I’ve had loads just fizzle out over time. Life moves on.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Let it fizzle, especially when I noticed I was the one always sending the first message

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By *alguyMan  over a year ago

Gibraltar & Manchester

I've never definitively ended a friendship (like say getting dumped as a teen or whatever) but of course many have just lapsed and fizzled away over time.

But also had some rekindled for whatever reason often just carrying one where we left off, even after decades.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't abandon my friends even if i was the one who had to be abandoned its who i am thats my code if someone has got close enough to me they are family and i don't know anyone who would abandon family if i need to be sacrificed for someone i care for to be happy il hate it but i will take it

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.

Fizzle; it naturally happens over time. Sometimes I've explained why but I feel awful about it and then try and make the other person feel less bad so it becomes complicated. So fizzle generally. Trying to be better at speaking openly though.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Estella- I hope you’re ok, Lovely human

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman  over a year ago

Manchester(ish).


"Have you ever had to let a friendship go? Like make a purposeful decision that the relationship is done now and step away? Do you tell the other person or let it fizzle? "

Yes, my (ex) best friend and I parted company 11 years ago. We'd been best friends since school. It was very acrimonious at the end. We were just completely different people and couldn't reconcile.

I've 0 regrets.

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

yes I have. I deliberately let it fizzle but only after many occasions of attempting to keep it going. Oddly the person continued to send birthday and Christmas cards which I found very strange

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By *tephTV67TV/TS  over a year ago

Cheshire

I leave town, admittedly very expensive, new job, family, memories but at least I don’t have to see the tears and tantrums.

Although I’m guessing if I ended a friendship there’d be tears and tantrums, or else the moving towns would be a waste of time.

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By *stella OP   Woman  over a year ago

London


"Estella- I hope you’re ok, Lovely human "

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By *stella OP   Woman  over a year ago

London

Seems fizzle is the popular choice.

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan  over a year ago

Aylesbury


"Seems fizzle is the popular choice."

It's the least effort to be fair

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By *atfuckerbristolMan  over a year ago

Wells

Let it fizzle - and if the other person makes no effort at that point, it probably means you’re mutually fizzling.

I’ve tried the more up-front method, but I end up feeling shitty and regretful that way. Chances are I’d you’re at the point of making this decision, you don’t need the extra baggage.

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By *hrista BellendWoman  over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

Social friends sure, they fizzle out all the time.

Inner circle family, never. We always talk through it and come to a mutual conclusion, and I'm talking friends I'd trust my kids with, if we decide to take a break we decide it together

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By *red and Wilma 75Couple  over a year ago

Staffordshire

We let them fizzle out it’s the best way all around. It’s hard sometimes as a couple if one of you has stronger feelings than the other. But ultimately it’s always about us as a couple and that has to come first.

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By *ustBoWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

Most people who I've not wanted in touch with it just fizzled away. Usually because I got fed up of being the one to make an effort all the time to keep the friendship going .Or some who I realised over time were never a friend ànyhow but were just using me for what they thought were their own gain. It's just easier to let friendships like those fizzle away I guess,because sometimes even if you try and talk it through things will get twisted and lies get told to others .Mind you sometimes that happens regardless but I suppose it just shows you were never true friends when they do that anyhow and says more about them than you. You're better off away from people who do that I've found throughout my life.

Luckily I have a couple of amazing real friends who I trust and know we are there for each other no matter what happens in out lives.Some I've known for over 20 years others are more recent but they are true friendships and worth their weight in gold.

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By *ealitybitesMan  over a year ago

Belfast

I don't have a single friend from school because I found I was the one making all the effort to keep in touch.

I don't have the time or energy for one way friendships so I let them fizzle out without making a fuss over it.

The only time I gave an explanation was to someone I believed was toxic and she was attempting to affect my friendship with others.

She was already stalking her ex all over social media and as soon as I walked away she decided to do likewise with me.

If you aren't feeling it you are much better off just letting it go without explaining yourself because that usually just leads to further drama.

Most of the above also applies to fab friends if you think they are using you for their own agenda.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Have you ever had to let a friendship go? Like make a purposeful decision that the relationship is done now and step away? Do you tell the other person or let it fizzle? "

It would entirely depend on the reason I feel it needs to end.

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By *isstinseltoesWoman  over a year ago

Calderdale innit


"Let it fizzle, especially when I noticed I was the one always sending the first message"

This for me too

You get sick of making all the effort.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm not the most sociable of people normally and I don't really like phoning people to chat. I prefer face to face. I will chat when they are in front of me, but I'm terrible in keeping in contact so most of mine fizzle.

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By *ea monkeyMan  over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

Yes, I have done.

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By *iamondCougarWoman  over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

It depends why you want to cut ties….

I tend to just let it fizzle but I don’t re-engage once it’s done.

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By *mMrbrightsideMan  over a year ago

wakefield

I let a friendship with my very best friend from when I was a teenager fizzle out as life took over

Recently we met up and talked about the past and had a good laugh about our escapades but it’s not the same and I don’t feel the need to get in touch again which is a big shame

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Thinking back I've actually told two people I no longer want to be their friend. One was an alcoholic and I told her I couldn't be her friend until she sought help. Another was stalking a mutual friend of ours in a very creepy way and tried to get to her through me. I told her I never wanted to see or speak to her again.

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By *estless nativeMan  over a year ago

near Glasgow

I've allowed a number of friendships to end mostly due to negative behaviours that I was longer willing to tolerate

Unfortunately that has also impacted where there have been mutual friends caught in the middle.

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By *enrietteandSamCouple  over a year ago

Staffordshire

We’ve let some fizzle out of their own accord but as we’ve aged our fucks given has become far less and if one of us starts to feel something isn’t what we wanted then we’re more inclined to just cold cut tie’s these days.

When it comes to new friendship’s it takes time for true colours to show through.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm not the most sociable of people normally and I don't really like phoning people to chat. I prefer face to face. I will chat when they are in front of me, but I'm terrible in keeping in contact so most of mine fizzle."

Do you text/ message?

I can't remember the last time I spoke to someone on the phone who wasn't a doctor's receptionist/ takeaway.

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By *a LunaWoman  over a year ago

South Wales

Unless I’m purposefully told then I just hang around like a bad smell!

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By *riving_Home_For_MimiWoman  over a year ago

Hampshire/Dorset

Yep, I actually told one person I just couldn't be friends with them anymore (via text) I don't have an issue cutting people out if they're taking the piss.

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By *agneto.Man  over a year ago

Bham

I am shit at keeping in touch. They usually fizzle.

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By *emorefridaCouple  over a year ago

La la land

I did a few years ago with 2 close friends. I wrote a long letter to them both, explaining how they were making me feel. Which was I needed help I was about to leave my ex, which I had avoided asking for help as they both had recently split up from their partners, so o helped them and was asking for the same help in return. They got defensive and dismissive and I cut off all contact from them. It hurt but it was the correct decision.

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