We have a set of questions which are a way of vetting people. These work surprisingly well! What do you guys think?
1. Are you in a relationship where the other partner does not know that you’re meeting others.
2. Do you accept that consent can be withdrawn at any point in the process, including up to and during sex.
3. Are you in anyway homophobic, transphobic or racist.
4. Will you bore us by talking about fishing or football at all
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve got my own set of questions.
1 why all the questions?
2 if I score better on your questions than you do on mine, what do I win?
3 can I talk about golf?
4 do you have a sense of humour?
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"I think people will tell you, what they think you want to hear.
^this! "
Probably, but the asking of the questions sometimes puts people off.
Which I’ve found is a good thing. We’re not desperate to meet just anyone. We’re happy to wait to meet the right people! |
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"I’ve got my own set of questions.
1 why all the questions?
2 if I score better on your questions than you do on mine, what do I win?
3 can I talk about golf?
4 do you have a sense of humour?
"
Love a bit of golf chat! |
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Always good to have a good basis to start off with.
We've heard others like to use a traffic light system, where one partner could mention a fruit/vegetable and depending on the colour would indicate to their partner what they are truly feeling at the moment.
For example. If you were getting busy, and didn't feel entirely comfortable to say no, or something isn't quite right, you could mention about the tomato field you saw on the way there, or maybe the plentiful pumpkins on display at Halloween. The partner would read that as something is off, so play should stop and things discussed (privately if needed).
We are in the belief that anybody, at any time, could say no. And every single person should immediately accept that and act adult about it. No asking questions required. No sad puppy dog eyes. Just accept it and mark it up to an issue avoided.
As for boring people to death about fishing. We don't fish, but our fish facts are entertaining as fuck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have a set of questions which are a way of vetting people. These work surprisingly well! What do you guys think?
1. Are you in a relationship where the other partner does not know that you’re meeting others.
2. Do you accept that consent can be withdrawn at any point in the process, including up to and during sex.
3. Are you in anyway homophobic, transphobic or racist.
4. Will you bore us by talking about fishing or football at all
"
Awww but you two are the best ever
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have a set of questions which are a way of vetting people. These work surprisingly well! What do you guys think?
1. Are you in a relationship where the other partner does not know that you’re meeting others.
2. Do you accept that consent can be withdrawn at any point in the process, including up to and during sex.
3. Are you in anyway homophobic, transphobic or racist.
4. Will you bore us by talking about fishing or football at all
"
they will just lie or tell you what you want to hear .... 28 years on the scene has taught us how to avoid as many fakes / none swingers / sex on a plate type and its not by asking questions because of what we just said ... if you talk to someone long enough they will slip up or say something you dont agree with also trust your gut feeling they rarely let you down ..
of course some will slip past but can be dealt with later we've stopped meet as we've got undressed before one a few weeks ago he got down to his boxers and a racist remark was made then it was bye bte |
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Seems bad because people will just lie.
Do you really think any thirsty guy on here is gonna admit that he might spit his dummy out if you withdraw consent at the last minute
It’s the equivalent of asking someone if they’re a murderer. “Oh your not? That’s that cleared up then” |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I love questions because I'm naturally curious about people but... you've got to weather that with some conversation so it's not like a rather dreary test/interrogation you have to pass. People lie. Why not let those things naturally pop up? The likelihood of someone saying well actually, yeah I'm a massive racist is low. Really low. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
They’re good questions but it’s not about asking them directly, it’s about discovering the real answers through conversation.
People will always seek to give the ‘correct’ answers if it means them getting laid.
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"We have a set of questions which are a way of vetting people. These work surprisingly well! What do you guys think?
1. Are you in a relationship where the other partner does not know that you’re meeting others.
2. Do you accept that consent can be withdrawn at any point in the process, including up to and during sex.
3. Are you in anyway homophobic, transphobic or racist.
4. Will you bore us by talking about fishing or football at all
"
I would answer but I suspect you'd want to shag us, and we're not ready for that yet. |
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"I love questions because I'm naturally curious about people but... you've got to weather that with some conversation so it's not like a rather dreary test/interrogation you have to pass. People lie. Why not let those things naturally pop up? The likelihood of someone saying well actually, yeah I'm a massive racist is low. Really low."
That’s the point, it’s how the questions are received rather than what the answers are.
We asked them today. Kinda guessing the guy was playing away and by not answering us he kinda showed us that he wasn’t for us! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have a set of questions which are a way of vetting people. These work surprisingly well! What do you guys think?
1. Are you in a relationship where the other partner does not know that you’re meeting others.
2. Do you accept that consent can be withdrawn at any point in the process, including up to and during sex.
3. Are you in anyway homophobic, transphobic or racist.
4. Will you bore us by talking about fishing or football at all
"
No not in a relationship at all
Yes I accept that 100%
Nope I respect everyone
Fishing no I’ll only talk sports if the conversation went that way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve got my own set of questions.
1 why all the questions?
2 if I score better on your questions than you do on mine, what do I win?
3 can I talk about golf?
4 do you have a sense of humour?
Love a bit of golf chat! "
I hope you find people who can answer yours perfectly too. |
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"I think people will tell you, what they think you want to hear."
This is why we avoid too much detail in terms of our preferences on our couples profile. Lots of people do modify what they say to get into your pants. Leaving things ambiguous an letting them reveal more of them self without framework to work from gives more chance of getting a more honest representation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think people will tell you, what they think you want to hear.
^this!
Probably, but the asking of the questions sometimes puts people off.
Which I’ve found is a good thing. We’re not desperate to meet just anyone. We’re happy to wait to meet the right people! "
It would put me off, it's not a job interview. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find the idea of questions this way to be off putting.
Much prefer to converse together, all getting to express ourselves and find where we match.
I'm thinking most could guess the correct answers to those questions too, regardless of their actual beliefs. |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I prefer to use multiple choice:
If we were fucking and Dolph Lundgren walked in what would you do?
A) High five him
B) shout out “that’s Dolph Lundgren!!”
C) Ignore the distraction and carry on ploughing my sweet sweet vagina
D) Who is Dolph Lundgren?
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"I prefer to use multiple choice:
If we were fucking and Dolph Lundgren walked in what would you do?
A) High five him
B) shout out “that’s Dolph Lundgren!!”
C) Ignore the distraction and carry on ploughing my sweet sweet vagina
D) Who is Dolph Lundgren?
"
D |
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"I’ve got my own set of questions.
1 why all the questions?
2 if I score better on your questions than you do on mine, what do I win?
3 can I talk about golf?
4 do you have a sense of humour?
"
By asking question 3 you would go straight to instablock. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I prefer to use multiple choice:
If we were fucking and Dolph Lundgren walked in what would you do?
A) High five him
B) shout out “that’s Dolph Lundgren!!”
C) Ignore the distraction and carry on ploughing my sweet sweet vagina
D) Who is Dolph Lundgren?
"
All of them at once |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve got my own set of questions.
1 why all the questions?
2 if I score better on your questions than you do on mine, what do I win?
3 can I talk about golf?
4 do you have a sense of humour?
By asking question 3 you would go straight to instablock. "
Join me for a round one time. Think of it as ‘taboo’ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve got my own set of questions.
1 why all the questions?
2 if I score better on your questions than you do on mine, what do I win?
3 can I talk about golf?
4 do you have a sense of humour?
"
You had me at golf J x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I prefer to use multiple choice:
If we were fucking and Dolph Lundgren walked in what would you do?
A) High five him
B) shout out “that’s Dolph Lundgren!!”
C) Ignore the distraction and carry on ploughing my sweet sweet vagina
D) Who is Dolph Lundgren?
"
I'd just be thinking we should've held off until we got to our room and not got carried away in the restaurant |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have a set of questions which are a way of vetting people. These work surprisingly well! What do you guys think?
1. Are you in a relationship where the other partner does not know that you’re meeting others.
2. Do you accept that consent can be withdrawn at any point in the process, including up to and during sex.
3. Are you in anyway homophobic, transphobic or racist.
4. Will you bore us by talking about fishing or football at all
"
Ummm nope.
I like just to have a conversation as opposed to reeling off questions. I wouldn’t expect a guy to ask me a bunch of questions so why should I J x |
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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago
Chinese Takeaway near you |
"We have a set of questions which are a way of vetting people. These work surprisingly well! What do you guys think?
1. Are you in a relationship where the other partner does not know that you’re meeting others.
2. Do you accept that consent can be withdrawn at any point in the process, including up to and during sex.
3. Are you in anyway homophobic, transphobic or racist.
4. Will you bore us by talking about fishing or football at all
Ummm nope.
I like just to have a conversation as opposed to reeling off questions. I wouldn’t expect a guy to ask me a bunch of questions so why should I J x "
Well said |
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