FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > A class of one’s own
A class of one’s own
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Idk why I did that with the title.
Anyway- let’s talk social class
To you, does class matter to you when meeting others? Consciously or unconsciously, interrogate that shit. Give me the deep thoughts. Do you think it matters to others on here in your experience?
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I'm me, take me or leave me I speak as I find at most times (some very inopportune) - the 2 folk I hold most dear are however most definitely middle class, one a cbe no less (for services to the country)
On paper we should never even have met nor be friends, in reality - I'm very honoured to call each of them friend. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Idk why I did that with the title.
Anyway- let’s talk social class
To you, does class matter to you when meeting others? Consciously or unconsciously, interrogate that shit. Give me the deep thoughts. Do you think it matters to others on here in your experience?
"
Does it affect your, OP? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Admittedly yes…I don’t get on well with middle class people as well as I get on with working class people…i have middle class friends and there’s always that realisation between us that she’s been given more opportunities due to her class.
It’s also a case of us as people…I’m proud of being working class; it’s made me who I am, and I just don’t think I could relate to a middle class person. That being said; if we get on well enough it wouldn’t matter tbh. As long as there’s no classism in the friendship it’s fine.
Tho, I have ended relationships and friendships over classism. Not about that shit. |
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I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education"
Why would you not meet HRH? Is it because of his class and what it represents or because you wouldn't meet him, regardless of it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't, but I do come from a background deeply rooted in caste system and status and the idea that I'd have to marry someone of the same race and religion but if they were of a "lower caste", it would not be allowed. A lot of my family still believe in this but it honestly makes me cringe. |
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education
Why would you not meet HRH? Is it because of his class and what it represents or because you wouldn't meet him, regardless of it."
I wouldn't know how to behave. There's a certain protocol surrounding meeting him and I'd have no idea . I'm well aware that it's me and my bias not him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education
Why would you not meet HRH? Is it because of his class and what it represents or because you wouldn't meet him, regardless of it.
I wouldn't know how to behave. There's a certain protocol surrounding meeting him and I'd have no idea . I'm well aware that it's me and my bias not him. "
Is it the HRH protocol and formalities rather than a class issue? Would you turn down someone who was from a class different to what you are familiar with in an informal meeting? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"* yours"
You know, I want to say no but when I interrogate it it probably does. I suppose in the way I filter out based on language used on profiles and not on fab but on other dating apps I’ve found myself doing it about education level and had to check myself. I think class is complicated. Mostly my upbringing was pretty (lower) middle class I guess but I have struggled to feel like I belong there. I’ve questioned why? You know me- race is obviously a factor. Some experiences at uni with racism which had classist undertones made me question a lot of my interactions with ‘middle class’ people. . But friends and local area too. I think I’m equally likely to filter middle class people out unconsciously. Worry about how they see me, imposter syndrome, even though we often have some very similar experiences.
Sorry this is really long but I guess the answer is I probably do unconsciously but I also make effort to challenge those thought processes when they come up if I recognise them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The short answer yes it matters to people.
The whole class system was created to divide society based on how much money they have and that shit sticks. People makes assumptions about who people are based on their background and will judge them without even realising.
We are all the same, just people. I don't care where someone is from, what their job is or how much money they have. I only care who they are as a person and good people don't need a class system to show that. |
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education
Why would you not meet HRH? Is it because of his class and what it represents or because you wouldn't meet him, regardless of it.
I wouldn't know how to behave. There's a certain protocol surrounding meeting him and I'd have no idea . I'm well aware that it's me and my bias not him.
Is it the HRH protocol and formalities rather than a class issue? Would you turn down someone who was from a class different to what you are familiar with in an informal meeting?"
I think the protocol is interwoven with the class.
No, I wouldn't turn someone down from a class different to mine, as I said, it wouldn't stop me meeting people. I used Prince Charles as a sort of extreme example but I acknowledge that there are some people whose life experience is so far removed from mine that social interaction would probably be a bit awkward. Again that's me, not them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"* yours
You know, I want to say no but when I interrogate it it probably does. I suppose in the way I filter out based on language used on profiles and not on fab but on other dating apps I’ve found myself doing it about education level and had to check myself. I think class is complicated. Mostly my upbringing was pretty (lower) middle class I guess but I have struggled to feel like I belong there. I’ve questioned why? You know me- race is obviously a factor. Some experiences at uni with racism which had classist undertones made me question a lot of my interactions with ‘middle class’ people. . But friends and local area too. I think I’m equally likely to filter middle class people out unconsciously. Worry about how they see me, imposter syndrome, even though we often have some very similar experiences.
Sorry this is really long but I guess the answer is I probably do unconsciously but I also make effort to challenge those thought processes when they come up if I recognise them. "
Long answers are good when there's a point to put across and you have made yours eloquently. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education
Why would you not meet HRH? Is it because of his class and what it represents or because you wouldn't meet him, regardless of it.
I wouldn't know how to behave. There's a certain protocol surrounding meeting him and I'd have no idea . I'm well aware that it's me and my bias not him.
Is it the HRH protocol and formalities rather than a class issue? Would you turn down someone who was from a class different to what you are familiar with in an informal meeting?
I think the protocol is interwoven with the class.
No, I wouldn't turn someone down from a class different to mine, as I said, it wouldn't stop me meeting people. I used Prince Charles as a sort of extreme example but I acknowledge that there are some people whose life experience is so far removed from mine that social interaction would probably be a bit awkward. Again that's me, not them."
That's an interesting observation that "the protocol is interwoven with the class." I would disagree with that. I think it's the perception that it is somewhat representative of the class that has many ill at ease with meeting someone born to that class. They feel they need to 'behave' a certain way lest they embarrass themselves, which is an uncomfortable thought. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The short answer yes it matters to people.
The whole class system was created to divide society based on how much money they have and that shit sticks. People makes assumptions about who people are based on their background and will judge them without even realising.
We are all the same, just people. I don't care where someone is from, what their job is or how much money they have. I only care who they are as a person and good people don't need a class system to show that."
Do you not believe that most people think like you, whatever their class? I would say that it is the 'upper classes', as in upper middle class upwards, who are the least 'classist' when it comes to meeting poeple. They, on the other hand, tend to be met by 'classists' from the 'lower classes' who deem them 'rich bastards' simply for being seen as part of the 'upper classes'. I see that here all the time. |
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"
I think the protocol is interwoven with the class.
No, I wouldn't turn someone down from a class different to mine, as I said, it wouldn't stop me meeting people. I used Prince Charles as a sort of extreme example but I acknowledge that there are some people whose life experience is so far removed from mine that social interaction would probably be a bit awkward. Again that's me, not them.
That's an interesting observation that "the protocol is interwoven with the class." I would disagree with that. I think it's the perception that it is somewhat representative of the class that has many ill at ease with meeting someone born to that class. They feel they need to 'behave' a certain way lest they embarrass themselves, which is an uncomfortable thought."
What would you say defines class? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education"
I'd this the same people who use "having standards" to explain why they don't like certain people?
Mr |
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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago
Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds |
To me, yes, to a degree it matters. I am a very shy, quiet person and I am intimidated very easily. Once I'm past that barrier it's not an issue but before then definitely. There can be no denying that the upper classes have much better access to education and healthcare and so are far more likely to be smarter and healthier than myself which sadly I find a bit scary.
It also subscribes to a level of what I call "reverse snobbery" the working class (in my circle anyway) are largely against anyone attempting to better themselves and so due to peer pressure, are less likely to want to associate with anyone outside of their social class.
P |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I think the protocol is interwoven with the class.
No, I wouldn't turn someone down from a class different to mine, as I said, it wouldn't stop me meeting people. I used Prince Charles as a sort of extreme example but I acknowledge that there are some people whose life experience is so far removed from mine that social interaction would probably be a bit awkward. Again that's me, not them.
That's an interesting observation that "the protocol is interwoven with the class." I would disagree with that. I think it's the perception that it is somewhat representative of the class that has many ill at ease with meeting someone born to that class. They feel they need to 'behave' a certain way lest they embarrass themselves, which is an uncomfortable thought.
What would you say defines class? "
It's a social construct that is hard to define anymore. I would most certainly say wealth does NOT define class in the least. It does, however, afford one to move into a certain social circle.
If you want to send your child to public school or visit a private doctor, it is more comfortable to speak to others in the same position to afford it than to speak of it to someone struggling to pay their bills. That would be inappropriate and if done to show their wealth, crass at the very least. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Umm. To answer you OP, yes, no, maybe.
I try realy hard not to judge people on anything but their behaviour so do my best to not assume a person matches certain class stereotypes without making the effort to find out. That said, there are certain stereotypical behaviors associated with different classes that I really do not like.
I'm still unsure of my class tbh, upper working class I guess. Maybe these days just brushing lower middle class, who knows
Mr |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Admittedly yes…I don’t get on well with middle class people as well as I get on with working class people…i have middle class friends and there’s always that realisation between us that she’s been given more opportunities due to her class.
It’s also a case of us as people…I’m proud of being working class; it’s made me who I am, and I just don’t think I could relate to a middle class person. That being said; if we get on well enough it wouldn’t matter tbh. As long as there’s no classism in the friendship it’s fine.
Tho, I have ended relationships and friendships over classism. Not about that shit."
Interesting to hear how you’d distinguish between middle and working class.
I’m from a very working class background, I remain close to many working class friends, I work hard for a living, but happen to have found myself in a well paid job that means I can live in a lovely village and enjoy some nice things.
Does this make me middle class? Does it mean you’d be less inclined to meet me , just because I’ve “done ok for myself?”
Genuine question for discussion. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
I think the protocol is interwoven with the class.
No, I wouldn't turn someone down from a class different to mine, as I said, it wouldn't stop me meeting people. I used Prince Charles as a sort of extreme example but I acknowledge that there are some people whose life experience is so far removed from mine that social interaction would probably be a bit awkward. Again that's me, not them.
That's an interesting observation that "the protocol is interwoven with the class." I would disagree with that. I think it's the perception that it is somewhat representative of the class that has many ill at ease with meeting someone born to that class. They feel they need to 'behave' a certain way lest they embarrass themselves, which is an uncomfortable thought.
What would you say defines class?
It's a social construct that is hard to define anymore. I would most certainly say wealth does NOT define class in the least. It does, however, afford one to move into a certain social circle.
If you want to send your child to public school or visit a private doctor, it is more comfortable to speak to others in the same position to afford it than to speak of it to someone struggling to pay their bills. That would be inappropriate and if done to show their wealth, crass at the very least."
I agree that too much emphasis is placed on money but I think wealth is a big factor in terms of things like inheritance. I remember talking to someone about not being that bothered about buying a house or about home ownership and they commented on how it’s from a place of privilege in terms of knowing you’ll inherit property or things of similar value.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The short answer yes it matters to people.
The whole class system was created to divide society based on how much money they have and that shit sticks. People makes assumptions about who people are based on their background and will judge them without even realising.
We are all the same, just people. I don't care where someone is from, what their job is or how much money they have. I only care who they are as a person and good people don't need a class system to show that.
Do you not believe that most people think like you, whatever their class? I would say that it is the 'upper classes', as in upper middle class upwards, who are the least 'classist' when it comes to meeting poeple. They, on the other hand, tend to be met by 'classists' from the 'lower classes' who deem them 'rich bastards' simply for being seen as part of the 'upper classes'. I see that here all the time."
Your comment shows that people do make assumptions. In my experience, people who are rich behave in a certain manner and it's their attitude I have a problem with, nothing to do with class. Again I'm not putting everyone in the same box, this is just my experience so it might be the case for these other 'lower class' people you speak of. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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PS - I happen to think “class in general” is best measured by the way a person relates to, treats and behaves around others, irrespective of their “social class” |
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education
Why would you not meet HRH? Is it because of his class and what it represents or because you wouldn't meet him, regardless of it.
I wouldn't know how to behave. There's a certain protocol surrounding meeting him and I'd have no idea . I'm well aware that it's me and my bias not him. "
Don't worry, when you are invited to meet Royalty you'd get advice on the protocols and formalities.
Many of the Royal family are much more down to earth than we think they'll be.
When you've heard a Princess say fuck........
Winston |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think we all have biases. Class is a confusing issue for me, probably because I'm autistic and social norms and expectations go over my head. I'm from a mixed background of working class tradesmen and middle class academics and I feel equally uneasy around both. The people I've met from here have tended to be a bit nonconformist or quirky, they don't quite fit in, like me. They've been from all backgrounds and levels of education, including the son of a baronet to a carer of disabled people. My own particular bias is that I expect neurotypical people to find me awkward and uninteresting and that we'll have no common ground, which I know is rubbish. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Sorry I’m not replying to people but I’ve read all your responses. Just I wouldn’t have the time to reply to ALL.
In terms of defining class, it’s so difficult isn’t it. And of course we’re talking about class in Britain here. But yeah I’d say it’s about wealth, education and social standing of your parents and wider family. It’s about social connections. It’s about your own education both formal and informal. And it’s also reaffirmed in things like tastes (musical, food, dress), accent and language etc. It’s difficult to define but I guess if you see someone you will know.
I think a lot about Bourdieu when I think about class. Social, symbolic, cultural, economic capitals are all key and make up our understanding of where someone fits in our definitions of class.
I also think class is interesting along race lines largely because of the cultural capital aspect and also because of the way racism operates as exclusionary which means that it can be used to make one feel excluded within a social group to which they belong. Other stuff too but this isn’t an essay.
I guess when looking for partners, sexual or even romantic relationship partners, I suggest that these things are so ingrained that they do impact our thought processes and our ‘tastes’ to use that word again. And I think it creates divides that we sometimes struggle to overcome. Lots of people for example on here talk about age as a factor between people in terms of ‘what do you have in common’ and I suggest that has much to do with cultural capital, and the projection of that as well as the idea. Because of course, you have in common with people what you have in common based on taste, experience, interest etc. not to start a convo about age- that was just an example. Possibly a bad one but you get what I was trying to do.
Again sorry this is long but I’d love thoughts in this. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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On the point about language. Code switching makes things interesting. People can often or feel like they can often easily switch between languages when situations require it and go unnoticed. I actually think that often, it’s noticeable when you’re ‘switching’ upwards but haven’t been socialised to. My mum, bless her, does this with her what I call posh voice. It’s not hiding as well as she thinks, clear indicators of class. Interestingly I think having been socialised simultaneously in to both spaces I think you can get away with switching seamlessly. It’s like being bilingual. If you learn as a child when growing up your accents are less distinguishable apparently when you speak the different languages - you can sound native in both. If you learn at 25, the accent of your first language is harder to shift. |
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"Sorry I’m not replying to people but I’ve read all your responses. Just I wouldn’t have the time to reply to ALL.
In terms of defining class, it’s so difficult isn’t it. And of course we’re talking about class in Britain here. But yeah I’d say it’s about wealth, education and social standing of your parents and wider family. It’s about social connections. It’s about your own education both formal and informal. And it’s also reaffirmed in things like tastes (musical, food, dress), accent and language etc. It’s difficult to define but I guess if you see someone you will know.
I think a lot about Bourdieu when I think about class. Social, symbolic, cultural, economic capitals are all key and make up our understanding of where someone fits in our definitions of class.
I also think class is interesting along race lines largely because of the cultural capital aspect and also because of the way racism operates as exclusionary which means that it can be used to make one feel excluded within a social group to which they belong. Other stuff too but this isn’t an essay.
I guess when looking for partners, sexual or even romantic relationship partners, I suggest that these things are so ingrained that they do impact our thought processes and our ‘tastes’ to use that word again. And I think it creates divides that we sometimes struggle to overcome. Lots of people for example on here talk about age as a factor between people in terms of ‘what do you have in common’ and I suggest that has much to do with cultural capital, and the projection of that as well as the idea. Because of course, you have in common with people what you have in common based on taste, experience, interest etc. not to start a convo about age- that was just an example. Possibly a bad one but you get what I was trying to do.
Again sorry this is long but I’d love thoughts in this. "
I think the thread has been very focused on not being able to connect with the person because of difference in class
I’ve never experienced that. I’m definitely from a lower class family. Raised that way. And I’ll live that way. I’ve successfully dated girls from family’s that could buy the street I grew up on. I’ve never found class a problem with connecting or attracting partners
For me, self consciously, I just can’t see how I’d make a meaningful relationship last with a woman that grew up around wealth. I dunno how I’d compete with expensive holidays, fine dining and fancy shopping sprees. And at the frequency they’re used to that stuff.
Can we meet for a drink and get on? Sure
Will she maybe fancy me because I’m funny and I’m that bit of rough and ready you get with a tradesman? Yes
It that going to last when we don’t go on our 4th holiday of the year? Is she gonna stick around when her entirely social circle is full of guts like me, but with money? Most likely not
Fastest swipe left for me on dating apps is lots of holiday pics. I’m fully aware of the type of life I’m gonna live. And it’s not a middle/upper class one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I think the protocol is interwoven with the class.
No, I wouldn't turn someone down from a class different to mine, as I said, it wouldn't stop me meeting people. I used Prince Charles as a sort of extreme example but I acknowledge that there are some people whose life experience is so far removed from mine that social interaction would probably be a bit awkward. Again that's me, not them.
That's an interesting observation that "the protocol is interwoven with the class." I would disagree with that. I think it's the perception that it is somewhat representative of the class that has many ill at ease with meeting someone born to that class. They feel they need to 'behave' a certain way lest they embarrass themselves, which is an uncomfortable thought.
What would you say defines class?
It's a social construct that is hard to define anymore. I would most certainly say wealth does NOT define class in the least. It does, however, afford one to move into a certain social circle.
If you want to send your child to public school or visit a private doctor, it is more comfortable to speak to others in the same position to afford it than to speak of it to someone struggling to pay their bills. That would be inappropriate and if done to show their wealth, crass at the very least.
I agree that too much emphasis is placed on money but I think wealth is a big factor in terms of things like inheritance. I remember talking to someone about not being that bothered about buying a house or about home ownership and they commented on how it’s from a place of privilege in terms of knowing you’ll inherit property or things of similar value.
"
Would inheritance be deemed a class matter? That's a privilege any class can pass on to their inheritors.
Would it be more correct to define modern class as a basket in the way that inflation is calculated. If one has or does a+b+c=..., they would be deemed a certain 'class'. |
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education
I'd this the same people who use "having standards" to explain why they don't like certain people?
Mr"
ooo don't go there |
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education
Why would you not meet HRH? Is it because of his class and what it represents or because you wouldn't meet him, regardless of it.
I wouldn't know how to behave. There's a certain protocol surrounding meeting him and I'd have no idea . I'm well aware that it's me and my bias not him.
Don't worry, when you are invited to meet Royalty you'd get advice on the protocols and formalities.
Many of the Royal family are much more down to earth than we think they'll be.
When you've heard a Princess say fuck........
Winston"
The likelihood of me ever being invited to meet royalty is so remote that I don't think we need to worry |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
I think the protocol is interwoven with the class.
No, I wouldn't turn someone down from a class different to mine, as I said, it wouldn't stop me meeting people. I used Prince Charles as a sort of extreme example but I acknowledge that there are some people whose life experience is so far removed from mine that social interaction would probably be a bit awkward. Again that's me, not them.
That's an interesting observation that "the protocol is interwoven with the class." I would disagree with that. I think it's the perception that it is somewhat representative of the class that has many ill at ease with meeting someone born to that class. They feel they need to 'behave' a certain way lest they embarrass themselves, which is an uncomfortable thought.
What would you say defines class?
It's a social construct that is hard to define anymore. I would most certainly say wealth does NOT define class in the least. It does, however, afford one to move into a certain social circle.
If you want to send your child to public school or visit a private doctor, it is more comfortable to speak to others in the same position to afford it than to speak of it to someone struggling to pay their bills. That would be inappropriate and if done to show their wealth, crass at the very least.
I agree that too much emphasis is placed on money but I think wealth is a big factor in terms of things like inheritance. I remember talking to someone about not being that bothered about buying a house or about home ownership and they commented on how it’s from a place of privilege in terms of knowing you’ll inherit property or things of similar value.
Would inheritance be deemed a class matter? That's a privilege any class can pass on to their inheritors.
Would it be more correct to define modern class as a basket in the way that inflation is calculated. If one has or does a+b+c=..., they would be deemed a certain 'class'."
I think inheritance is a class issue. And I think privilege is too. Which is why class is complex. But it’s not wealth alone of course. ‘Working class’ people inherit property etc as well. But say, generations later I think it shows. So if one person is inheriting a property AND has been brought up to belong or to feel like they belong in a certain class box, the inheritance is relevant to their class, it adds to it in terms of financial capital. I think people place to much emphasis however on finances because financial capital is obtainable pretty easily. But still, it would be say for me the difference between one person being ‘lower working class’ and like ‘upper working class’. Sorry I can’t think of the correct class terms right now.
I guess I’m waffling around just trying to say that I think class can only be defined encompassing all. Not to say everyone that inherits a house is middle class. But that inheriting a house helps maintain and reproduce those that already belong to the middle class or whose family, generations later, may become middle class. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The short answer yes it matters to people.
The whole class system was created to divide society based on how much money they have and that shit sticks. People makes assumptions about who people are based on their background and will judge them without even realising.
We are all the same, just people. I don't care where someone is from, what their job is or how much money they have. I only care who they are as a person and good people don't need a class system to show that.
Do you not believe that most people think like you, whatever their class? I would say that it is the 'upper classes', as in upper middle class upwards, who are the least 'classist' when it comes to meeting poeple. They, on the other hand, tend to be met by 'classists' from the 'lower classes' who deem them 'rich bastards' simply for being seen as part of the 'upper classes'. I see that here all the time.
Your comment shows that people do make assumptions. In my experience, people who are rich behave in a certain manner and it's their attitude I have a problem with, nothing to do with class. Again I'm not putting everyone in the same box, this is just my experience so it might be the case for these other 'lower class' people you speak of."
I agree that people make assumptions and it works both ways. I was speaking of class, not wealth. That would be class as viewed from the old system of assumed privilege. Along with the old privileged class was a certain decorum and demeanour, attitude if you will, that deemed it vulgar and crass to belittle those less privileged or make them feel less worthy.
I think we can all agree that wealth is NOT class and can be attained by those with a good YouTube following now and there's no accounting for how that new wealth will behave or what attitude they have to those less wealthy than them.
That is how I make my assumption. |
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I am not British or Irish and have had a weird experience of social class on this side of the Atlantic.
In England, some people--not too many--ask probing questions to size me up for class.
In Scotland, this had never happened, and I have always felt that people don't care which side of the tracks I was born on. |
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"I'd be a liar if I claimed to have no class bias conscious or unconscious. I'm aware of it and try to compensate. It doesn't stop me meeting people but if HRH Prince Charles contacted me I'd probably turn him down.
From what I observe class matters very much to a lot of people on fab and they often confuse it with money and/or level of education
Why would you not meet HRH? Is it because of his class and what it represents or because you wouldn't meet him, regardless of it.
I wouldn't know how to behave. There's a certain protocol surrounding meeting him and I'd have no idea . I'm well aware that it's me and my bias not him.
Don't worry, when you are invited to meet Royalty you'd get advice on the protocols and formalities.
Many of the Royal family are much more down to earth than we think they'll be.
When you've heard a Princess say fuck........
Winston
The likelihood of me ever being invited to meet royalty is so remote that I don't think we need to worry "
I've always thought of you as Fab Royalty.
Winston |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Idk why I did that with the title.
Anyway- let’s talk social class
To you, does class matter to you when meeting others? Consciously or unconsciously, interrogate that shit. Give me the deep thoughts. Do you think it matters to others on here in your experience?
"
Meeting for sex or dating or...? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Idk why I did that with the title.
Anyway- let’s talk social class
To you, does class matter to you when meeting others? Consciously or unconsciously, interrogate that shit. Give me the deep thoughts. Do you think it matters to others on here in your experience?
Meeting for sex or dating or...?"
Both? Either? I’m enjoying reading this thread |
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I wrote a reply yesterday, read it back and it made me sound like a bit of a knob. (More than normal )
I'm not class selective, I'm just selective. I want to meet people on my wavelength. Don't care what their background is as long as we can get along and are of the same intellectual level. Does that make sense?
Does that sound knobbish? |
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