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What is......fair?
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
Came across the question this morning in a staff meeting and nobody could really agree on what would be "fair".
Does it mean sharing something in equal portions (even if one person hates the cake)?
Does it mean considering individual needs of your kids and spending different amounts of energy and money on them depending on those?
I am just in pondering mode .. so suggestions are welcome |
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"Came across the question this morning in a staff meeting and nobody could really agree on what would be "fair".
Does it mean sharing something in equal portions (even if one person hates the cake)?
Does it mean considering individual needs of your kids and spending different amounts of energy and money on them depending on those?
I am just in pondering mode .. so suggestions are welcome "
Think it not about portions or size it more to do with need. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Came across the question this morning in a staff meeting and nobody could really agree on what would be "fair".
Does it mean sharing something in equal portions (even if one person hates the cake)?
Does it mean considering individual needs of your kids and spending different amounts of energy and money on them depending on those?
I am just in pondering mode .. so suggestions are welcome
Think it not about portions or size it more to do with need. "
See that is what I am wondering... but then those who receive less... would argue that it is not fair? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sharing is giving enough to shut them up  Yes lol... but I want to know if it is fair.... Typical man, only heard half the story "
Define fair from a womans point of view |
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"Came across the question this morning in a staff meeting and nobody could really agree on what would be "fair".
Does it mean sharing something in equal portions (even if one person hates the cake)?
Does it mean considering individual needs of your kids and spending different amounts of energy and money on them depending on those?
I am just in pondering mode .. so suggestions are welcome
Think it not about portions or size it more to do with need. See that is what I am wondering... but then those who receive less... would argue that it is not fair? "
Fair is not about want its about what it actually needed
It's like I want sex but need a hug sort of a thing  |
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"Sharing is giving enough to shut them up Yes lol... but I want to know if it is fair.... Typical man, only heard half the story
Define fair from a womans point of view "
from a womans point of view the cake is all hers and thats fair  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sharing is giving enough to shut them up Yes lol... but I want to know if it is fair.... Typical man, only heard half the story
Define fair from a womans point of view
from a womans point of view the cake is all hers and thats fair "
not if its one I dont like  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fair is sharing equally and considering the needs of the others involved... I've tried to be fair with my kids throughout there whole lives although it hasn't been easy. I'm the same in life I like to give as much of my time equally between my friends when I'm free. Again not always possible or practical. |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Sharing is giving enough to shut them up Yes lol... but I want to know if it is fair.... Typical man, only heard half the story
Define fair from a womans point of view "
I am struggling with it that is why I am asking my clever forumates...
I would be inclined to think fair means attending to individual needs and if there are several poeple involved it would mean a compromise between those conflicting needs? |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Sharing is giving enough to shut them up Yes lol... but I want to know if it is fair.... Typical man, only heard half the story
Define fair from a womans point of view
from a womans point of view the cake is all hers and thats fair
not if its one I dont like "
That's it.. you tell Sam! |
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"Sharing is giving enough to shut them up Yes lol... but I want to know if it is fair.... Typical man, only heard half the story
Define fair from a womans point of view
from a womans point of view the cake is all hers and thats fair
not if its one I dont like "
are you sure you wouldnt take it just incase you changed your mind at a later date  |
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"Sharing is giving enough to shut them up Yes lol... but I want to know if it is fair.... Typical man, only heard half the story
Define fair from a womans point of view
from a womans point of view the cake is all hers and thats fair
not if its one I dont like
That's it.. you tell Sam!"
 trust you |
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would think where children are concerned its about being equal in your time and attention with them all..
sometimes things will crop up and one may miss out, good to remember to redress the balance cos bless em they dont forget..
heard a mum years ago in response to a child saying 'its not fair' reply 'neither is a black cat'..
sometimes life is 'unfair'..
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Sharing is giving enough to shut them up Yes lol... but I want to know if it is fair.... Typical man, only heard half the story
Define fair from a womans point of view
from a womans point of view the cake is all hers and thats fair
not if its one I dont like
That's it.. you tell Sam!
trust you"
You should lol |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"would think where children are concerned its about being equal in your time and attention with them all..
sometimes things will crop up and one may miss out, good to remember to redress the balance cos bless em they dont forget..
heard a mum years ago in response to a child saying 'its not fair' reply 'neither is a black cat'..
sometimes life is 'unfair'..
"
You are right sometimes life sucks... doesnt it... Sometimes bad thingas happen to good people, another example that life isnt always fair. |
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"would think where children are concerned its about being equal in your time and attention with them all..
sometimes things will crop up and one may miss out, good to remember to redress the balance cos bless em they dont forget..
heard a mum years ago in response to a child saying 'its not fair' reply 'neither is a black cat'..
sometimes life is 'unfair'..
You are right sometimes life sucks... doesnt it... Sometimes bad thingas happen to good people, another example that life isnt always fair. "
sometimes shit just happens, its how you deal with that which defines a person..
anyone can be a nice person when all is rosy.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the answer is 'it depends'. In some cases treating everybody exactly the same is the fairest way. In others that would be unfair. It would be unfair for teachers in secondary school to give all kids exactly the same amount of help In My Opinion as some kids learn things easier than others so the ones who struggle to learn something need extra help. However if a family of four share a cake it would seem fairest if each gets a quarter.
Of course regardless of how you define fair there will always be people who define it differently. Some people will believe that if a family of four share a cake then the two kids should get bigger pieces because they are kids. Or they may feel the person who made/paid for the cake should get a bigger bit. Some people might believe all children should get the same amount of help as it is 'unfair' on bright children if they receive less help just because they are brighter.
Personally I think 'fairness' is one if those concepts that doesn't actually exist. It is a word used a lot but had no single, tangible definition. Another example being 'freedom'. Is the prisoner in a jail who receives food, lodging, clothes and some exercise less free than a homeless person who in theory can go anywhere but lacks the means to feed or clothe themselves and has nowhere to live? Is the American president truly free if he can't spend a minute of his life without a team of people around him due to fear of assassination. And so on. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Surely if a group won’t agree what is fair ?, they should be challenged to define what in their mind is "unfair" and then asked to openly justify their individual view-point to the rest of the group.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sharing is giving enough to shut them up Yes lol... but I want to know if it is fair.... Typical man, only heard half the story
Define fair from a womans point of view
from a womans point of view the cake is all hers and thats fair
not if its one I dont like
are you sure you wouldnt take it just incase you changed your mind at a later date "
no cos that wouldnt be fair to deprive the people that would like it - purely cos I could have it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some christians believe that God was fair just by creating Hell. To know that if justices in the mortal life go away unpunished then not wherever the next place may be - there won't be such sneeky peeps.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Surely if a group won’t agree what is fair ?, they should be challenged to define what in their mind is "unfair" and then asked to openly justify their individual view-point to the rest of the group.
Good point, Soxy - no kidding"
Affro.....I guess what I was trying to say was "surely to define what is fair?, requires an answer that is unarguably rational and transparently unbiased"….
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hi again Aphrodite...
I think that find a workable definition of what is "fair" in regard to sharing - I can perhaps qualify it, but not quantify it...
I would compare it to "equality", by looking at it this way...
To share something (cake or whatever) in equal portions is "equality" - ie regardless of standing, so that nobody looses by discrimination.
Beyond that, to share, with agreement, on the basis of need is "fair".
If I was offered a share of cake because I was one of a group, then that would be on an equitable basis, and I would be duly grateful.
But If I already had sufficient for my own needs, and was actively aware that another recipient was desperately in need, then an equitable share would not be "fair" - Most reasonable and free-thinking people would gladly give up their equitable share of something in order to be fair and benefit others.
Which is why we see good deeds as "fair" - and we give to undeveloped countries, or simply to friends in need.
"Fair" is not always equitable - but it is the right thing to do, while being conscious of avoiding discrimination.
Sorry if that's all come out very wordy!!!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Came across the question this morning in a staff meeting and nobody could really agree on what would be "fair".
Does it mean sharing something in equal portions (even if one person hates the cake)?
Does it mean considering individual needs of your kids and spending different amounts of energy and money on them depending on those?
I am just in pondering mode .. so suggestions are welcome "
I had to study Contract Law many many moons ago, and the subject of 'Fairness' is central to that. The 'yardstick' was... is it fair to the man on the top of the No.8 bus... Well, I was puzzled at that one too, until the Lecturer explained that, when setting precedent, a Judge has to consider what would be fair/reasonable to 'the common man' - and the common man don't get much commoner than one who travels on the No 8 bus.... apparently..?
To say it means 'equal shares' would, I imagine, mean that would refer to 'fair shares' - which is a specific derivation of 'fairness', isn't it? Where's Professor XXX when you need him??
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Hi again Aphrodite...
I think that find a workable definition of what is "fair" in regard to sharing - I can perhaps qualify it, but not quantify it...
I would compare it to "equality", by looking at it this way...
To share something (cake or whatever) in equal portions is "equality" - ie regardless of standing, so that nobody looses by discrimination.
Beyond that, to share, with agreement, on the basis of need is "fair".
If I was offered a share of cake because I was one of a group, then that would be on an equitable basis, and I would be duly grateful.
But If I already had sufficient for my own needs, and was actively aware that another recipient was desperately in need, then an equitable share would not be "fair" - Most reasonable and free-thinking people would gladly give up their equitable share of something in order to be fair and benefit others.
Which is why we see good deeds as "fair" - and we give to undeveloped countries, or simply to friends in need.
"Fair" is not always equitable - but it is the right thing to do, while being conscious of avoiding discrimination.
Sorry if that's all come out very wordy!!!
"
I really like that post and particularly bringing in the concept of abundance that should in theory facilitate and encourage generosity towards the needier.  |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Came across the question this morning in a staff meeting and nobody could really agree on what would be "fair".
Does it mean sharing something in equal portions (even if one person hates the cake)?
Does it mean considering individual needs of your kids and spending different amounts of energy and money on them depending on those?
I am just in pondering mode .. so suggestions are welcome
I had to study Contract Law many many moons ago, and the subject of 'Fairness' is central to that. The 'yardstick' was... is it fair to the man on the top of the No.8 bus... Well, I was puzzled at that one too, until the Lecturer explained that, when setting precedent, a Judge has to consider what would be fair/reasonable to 'the common man' - and the common man don't get much commoner than one who travels on the No 8 bus.... apparently..?
To say it means 'equal shares' would, I imagine, mean that would refer to 'fair shares' - which is a specific derivation of 'fairness', isn't it? Where's Professor XXX when you need him??
"
I think I can see where you are coming from - and the anchor here is basing fairness on the "majority need" principle? I do wonder though, and I ll stick with my cake example... whether sharing a chocolate cake by dividing it into the number of guests is fair when one person hates chocolate cake and much rather have cheese. Only cheese is nt available as the budget was spent on the cake. Silly example, I know.. just to illustrate the point? |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
I have just finished a work call about this subject: we are arranging a debate on the language currently being used. Very spooky!
This government will not use equality anymore and talks about fairness instead. There are fairness commissions all over the place now! All are trying to grasp what fair means and how we can ensure that public policy is fair.
I have no answer at the moment as I think the word is being used to justify quite a lot of things that I would consider to be unfair. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I think I can see where you are coming from - and the anchor here is basing fairness on the "majority need" principle? I do wonder though, and I ll stick with my cake example... whether sharing a chocolate cake by dividing it into the number of guests is fair when one person hates chocolate cake and much rather have cheese. Only cheese is nt available as the budget was spent on the cake. Silly example, I know.. just to illustrate the point?"
That is exactly the public policy point! We don't all want chocolate cake, or even cheese. Some want and need other things too. The most articulate person was able to argue for cheese to be added but the person who needed salad didn't get to speak up. |
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"I have just finished a work call about this subject: we are arranging a debate on the language currently being used. Very spooky!
This government will not use equality anymore and talks about fairness instead. There are fairness commissions all over the place now! All are trying to grasp what fair means and how we can ensure that public policy is fair.
I have no answer at the moment as I think the word is being used to justify quite a lot of things that I would consider to be unfair."
Every government seems to tag a key word and then twist it to meet their own needs |
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By *phrodite OP Woman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I think I can see where you are coming from - and the anchor here is basing fairness on the "majority need" principle? I do wonder though, and I ll stick with my cake example... whether sharing a chocolate cake by dividing it into the number of guests is fair when one person hates chocolate cake and much rather have cheese. Only cheese is nt available as the budget was spent on the cake. Silly example, I know.. just to illustrate the point?
That is exactly the public policy point! We don't all want chocolate cake, or even cheese. Some want and need other things too. The most articulate person was able to argue for cheese to be added but the person who needed salad didn't get to speak up."
Hell, yes... that is yet another point, the lobbying and the level of fairness in representation. Again, if you are not able/ capable for whatever reason to fend for yourself, your rights, perceived or otherwise then the whole concept of fairness is doomed before the discussion has even begun. |
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