FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > The Art of Conversation
The Art of Conversation
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We all have different definitions of what a conversation is. I'm sure the people who give one word answers or ask standard questions believe they are having a conversation but in reality it's like pulling teeth. To me a conversation is a two way street.. ask questions, answer questions and show a little interest. |
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"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive. "
I think online makes that stuff more common. Conversation with a stranger without tonality, facial expressions, body language, it’s hard.
Not to mention lots of profiles on here will drone on about three importance of good chat, but give nothing good to chat about. How can you expect someone to have a decent conversation with you if your pics are just tits/dick and your bio is a long list of “no this. No that. Sick of timewasters” etc
Then add on that this is a mainly British site. The brits aren’t exactly known for their outstanding conversational skills with strangers |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've never been that great at small talk or initiating conversations, but when you get (if you're lucky) two-word replies, it feels like trying to get blood out of a stone!  |
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Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive. "
The correct answer to "hi how are you" is "I'm dying for your sexy massive cock in every hole. Send me your address and I'll be there in 10 minutes".
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
"
 |
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"I don't think conversation is a dying art but a lot of people aren't on fab to converse.
What are we here for?  "
I can only speak for myself and say that I am here for ideas on how to humanely move an ants nest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think conversation is a dying art but a lot of people aren't on fab to converse.
What are we here for?
I can only speak for myself and say that I am here for ideas on how to humanely move an ants nest. "
If/when you find out, can you be sure to let me know how too?   |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
"I don't think conversation is a dying art but a lot of people aren't on fab to converse.
What are we here for?
I can only speak for myself and say that I am here for ideas on how to humanely move an ants nest. "
They don’t like vinegar so put some diluted white vinegar in a spray bottle and squirt around it, they may clear off I hate the little blighters, the thought of them makes me itch  |
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By *eah BabyCouple
over a year ago
Cheshire, Windermere ,Cumbria |
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
"
Wow that’s an imagination, crazier than mine  |
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"I don't think conversation is a dying art but a lot of people aren't on fab to converse.
What are we here for?
I can only speak for myself and say that I am here for ideas on how to humanely move an ants nest.
If/when you find out, can you be sure to let me know how too? "
https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/1308527to
Here's the thread with all the help answer .
I found that watering the ground a lot actually reduced their numbers in the end |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes it is a dying art and it is generally all over social media it just fab
Generally People no longer care about other people unless they feel they can personally gain from it. Which is a little sad |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think conversation is a dying art but a lot of people aren't on fab to converse.
What are we here for?
I can only speak for myself and say that I am here for ideas on how to humanely move an ants nest.
If/when you find out, can you be sure to let me know how too?
https://www.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/1308527to
Here's the thread with all the help answer .
I found that watering the ground a lot actually reduced their numbers in the end "
Thank you, I will definitely have a look. Not got loads of the wee buggers, but would prefer them not marching single file into my kitchen  |
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It's the opening message of "hi" or "hello". Not just on fab can be elsewhere as well. Lack of effort on their part means I just cannot be bothered to reply. If I send a first message, it's always much more than that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'll be the first to admit
I absolutely suck at starting conversations via messages. That said, upon a rare occasion that someone engages back it sometimes feels that they want to be entertained and not actually be 50% of the conversation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive.
I think online makes that stuff more common. Conversation with a stranger without tonality, facial expressions, body language, it’s hard.
Not to mention lots of profiles on here will drone on about three importance of good chat, but give nothing good to chat about. How can you expect someone to have a decent conversation with you if your pics are just tits/dick and your bio is a long list of “no this. No that. Sick of timewasters” etc
Then add on that this is a mainly British site. The brits aren’t exactly known for their outstanding conversational skills with strangers "
Your first paragraph nails it. It's hard to drive a conversation without having seen them even once. I have asked questions around how to drive the conversation and learned some artificial ways to do it. But I still feel cringe when doing this.
This is one of the reasons I try to ask for a social meet as soon as possible even on vanilla dating apps. Not a big fan of texting forever with a person. Some women like that approach. Others disappear the moment I ask for a meet  |
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"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive.
I think online makes that stuff more common. Conversation with a stranger without tonality, facial expressions, body language, it’s hard.
Not to mention lots of profiles on here will drone on about three importance of good chat, but give nothing good to chat about. How can you expect someone to have a decent conversation with you if your pics are just tits/dick and your bio is a long list of “no this. No that. Sick of timewasters” etc
Then add on that this is a mainly British site. The brits aren’t exactly known for their outstanding conversational skills with strangers
Your first paragraph nails it. It's hard to drive a conversation without having seen them even once. I have asked questions around how to drive the conversation and learned some artificial ways to do it. But I still feel cringe when doing this.
This is one of the reasons I try to ask for a social meet as soon as possible even on vanilla dating apps. Not a big fan of texting forever with a person. Some women like that approach. Others disappear the moment I ask for a meet "
I do the same. Fact is. We could message and txt for years, I’ll still know more about you as a person and if I like you or not after a 15 minute social.
Text is an awful way to know about someone. I’ve had great txts with someone and then wanted to run away 5 mins into a social |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have lost the art of conversation. This is mostly due to being on my own a lot. I work long hours on my own mostly. I have now become boring  "
This ^^^  |
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The problem is “us” - couples & single females, by insta deleting a well constructed message only re-affirms that effort is pointless & validates the “hey,hi,how’s you” as when your not going to get a response either way what’s the point of creating something bespoke.
We as a fab community need to respond to these well crafted messages even if it’s a simple “great first message, unfortunately you’re not what we’re looking for right now”, any repeat messages can be deleted if they carry on, but we’ve found that they respect that response and move on.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I agree on the whole yet every now and then there is someone who really engages you. Those are the ones I meet.
Same here 
Same here "
Are you being cheeky  |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
"
Bravo sir.
This post didn’t get the recognition that it deserves
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The problem is “us” - couples & single females, by insta deleting a well constructed message only re-affirms that effort is pointless & validates the “hey,hi,how’s you” as when your not going to get a response either way what’s the point of creating something bespoke.
We as a fab community need to respond to these well crafted messages even if it’s a simple “great first message, unfortunately you’re not what we’re looking for right now”, any repeat messages can be deleted if they carry on, but we’ve found that they respect that response and move on.
"
This is exactly our approach. Where as the one word messages often result in a delete. Especially on Mrs singles profile as she gets so many crap messages there. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"The problem is “us” - couples & single females, by insta deleting a well constructed message only re-affirms that effort is pointless & validates the “hey,hi,how’s you” as when your not going to get a response either way what’s the point of creating something bespoke.
We as a fab community need to respond to these well crafted messages even if it’s a simple “great first message, unfortunately you’re not what we’re looking for right now”, any repeat messages can be deleted if they carry on, but we’ve found that they respect that response and move on.
"
There is that.
I’ve found that just sending messages to random folks is an exercise in futility anyway. No matter how well crafted or not, the reliance is upon events completely out of your control as to whether it’s received well. Even if you are a good match.
I’ve learnt to approach things in a different manner but I do agree with your point |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive.
I think online makes that stuff more common. Conversation with a stranger without tonality, facial expressions, body language, it’s hard.
Not to mention lots of profiles on here will drone on about three importance of good chat, but give nothing good to chat about. How can you expect someone to have a decent conversation with you if your pics are just tits/dick and your bio is a long list of “no this. No that. Sick of timewasters” etc
Then add on that this is a mainly British site. The brits aren’t exactly known for their outstanding conversational skills with strangers
Your first paragraph nails it. It's hard to drive a conversation without having seen them even once. I have asked questions around how to drive the conversation and learned some artificial ways to do it. But I still feel cringe when doing this.
This is one of the reasons I try to ask for a social meet as soon as possible even on vanilla dating apps. Not a big fan of texting forever with a person. Some women like that approach. Others disappear the moment I ask for a meet "
It’s not hard to have a conversation if you have never met them. I have built a business based on this. I won’t go into what you do need to do as I will get shot down (again) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive.
I think online makes that stuff more common. Conversation with a stranger without tonality, facial expressions, body language, it’s hard.
Not to mention lots of profiles on here will drone on about three importance of good chat, but give nothing good to chat about. How can you expect someone to have a decent conversation with you if your pics are just tits/dick and your bio is a long list of “no this. No that. Sick of timewasters” etc
Then add on that this is a mainly British site. The brits aren’t exactly known for their outstanding conversational skills with strangers
Your first paragraph nails it. It's hard to drive a conversation without having seen them even once. I have asked questions around how to drive the conversation and learned some artificial ways to do it. But I still feel cringe when doing this.
This is one of the reasons I try to ask for a social meet as soon as possible even on vanilla dating apps. Not a big fan of texting forever with a person. Some women like that approach. Others disappear the moment I ask for a meet
It’s not hard to have a conversation if you have never met them. I have built a business based on this. I won’t go into what you do need to do as I will get shot down (again) "
Some people enjoy doing it. Some people don't. As I mentioned, I can do it if I want, by following a list of ice-breakers and follow-ups. It's just that I hate doing it. Feels artificial and I haven't learned much about the person. Meet the person for a coffee/drink, talk for 15 minutes and I will have known the person much better than talking for hours on the internet. Although once I have been comfortable with someone in person, I don't mind texting. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Tell them something other than fine or ask then something other than how are you. It screams of nothing to say "
If I find their profile or pics attractive I generally will say more and be proactive. Its the ones that I don't, or they have no pics or little information on their profile, I can't be bothered with. If they find your profile attractive, then having initiated the contact, they should be prepared to wooh you. Sorry if that sounds big headed, but if it was the other way round, I would be prepared for the chase. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive.
The correct answer to "hi how are you" is "I'm dying for your sexy massive cock in every hole. Send me your address and I'll be there in 10 minutes".
"
I do, to the sexy ones.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The problem is “us” - couples & single females, by insta deleting a well constructed message only re-affirms that effort is pointless & validates the “hey,hi,how’s you” as when your not going to get a response either way what’s the point of creating something bespoke.
We as a fab community need to respond to these well crafted messages even if it’s a simple “great first message, unfortunately you’re not what we’re looking for right now”, any repeat messages can be deleted if they carry on, but we’ve found that they respect that response and move on.
"
I appreciate your point - but I'm not here to validate other people. A well-constructed message can still be creepy, can still be from someone who hasn't read the profile and doesn't change the number of messages someone receives. I don't accept that I am the problem.
And I also disagree that the art of conversation has died. There are nearly always several thoughtful and intelligent conversations happening on the forum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
"
Your messages exhibit the same flair as your photos Sir |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
"
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure. |
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"The problem is “us” - couples & single females, by insta deleting a well constructed message only re-affirms that effort is pointless & validates the “hey,hi,how’s you” as when your not going to get a response either way what’s the point of creating something bespoke.
We as a fab community need to respond to these well crafted messages even if it’s a simple “great first message, unfortunately you’re not what we’re looking for right now”, any repeat messages can be deleted if they carry on, but we’ve found that they respect that response and move on.
I appreciate your point - but I'm not here to validate other people. A well-constructed message can still be creepy, can still be from someone who hasn't read the profile and doesn't change the number of messages someone receives. I don't accept that I am the problem.
And I also disagree that the art of conversation has died. There are nearly always several thoughtful and intelligent conversations happening on the forum. "
Oh absolutely agree with you on the creepy front & that would get the block delete treatment without a second thought.
|
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"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure. "
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others."
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough  |
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By *ed wineMan
over a year ago
Where the streets have no name |
When you meet a new friend(s) in Fabs, it might be just another fuck or it might be an ephemeral moment that lasts an eternity in our memories.
Probably, a good conversation anticipating the encounter could make the difference. |
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"Standard message
"Hello"
"Fuck off weirdo"
"How rude"
Then followed with a block and an abusive status of how weird men are on here
Your welcome "
Is that common? Must admit it hasn't been my experience. Sure I've been turned down (a lot), either by no response or a polite 'thanks, but no thanks' but I've yet to receive actual abuse. |
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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"I don't think conversation is a dying art but a lot of people aren't on fab to converse. "
I think it depends if you mean virtually or in real life. There are many who are better at one or the other. I work with quite a lot of younger guys who are all using apps like Tinder. They are great online, they have time to formulate responses but fall totally flat face to face as they aren't used to the flow of conversation and get flustered under pressure. On the flip side there are those that can talk the arse off a donkey but treat online discourse as an exchange of information.
I don't know if this is a generational shift or issue. |
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"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive. "
I guess there's a range of people on here, same as you meet in a pub, at work, in a bike cafe...how many times has the initial eye candy then proved disappointing once you engage?
Personally I love it when there's a two way feed. I do feel some responsibility to drive the conversation, especially if I initiated it, to pick up on aspects of a profile, or things they have said. But it becomes tiring when I feel that I'm driving the entire conversion. |
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By *lynJMan
over a year ago
Morden |
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough "
From what I remember when I worked in Slough, they were a bit rubbish. Mind you, that was 20 odd years ago. Have they improved? |
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"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough "
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough. "
** Neither have I |
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"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I "
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad! |
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|
By *lynJMan
over a year ago
Morden |
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad! "
Mars bars are made in Slough (or were) |
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|
By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad!
Mars bars are made in Slough (or were)"
Looking at buying in Surrey last year..Slough is rough. |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The problem is “us” - couples & single females, by insta deleting a well constructed message only re-affirms that effort is pointless & validates the “hey,hi,how’s you” as when your not going to get a response either way what’s the point of creating something bespoke.
We as a fab community need to respond to these well crafted messages even if it’s a simple “great first message, unfortunately you’re not what we’re looking for right now”, any repeat messages can be deleted if they carry on, but we’ve found that they respect that response and move on.
"
|
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad! "
OMG! In like Flynn |
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or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad!
Mars bars are made in Slough (or were)
Looking at buying in Surrey last year..Slough is rough."
Yeah we aren't looking at buying there  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad!
Mars bars are made in Slough (or were)
Looking at buying in Surrey last year..Slough is rough.
Yeah we aren't looking at buying there "
We're not  |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive. "
Yes dieing fast. On here and out there in the wider world too. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad!
Mars bars are made in Slough (or were)
Looking at buying in Surrey last year..Slough is rough."
Slough’s Berkshire isn’t it? |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"we are all forgetting how to speak and have real life conversations, everythings text messages ending every sentence with a x for some reason.
my mobile never rings but non stop text messages. "
Yes. Whats this X thing? It baffles me. |
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|
By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"we are all forgetting how to speak and have real life conversations, everythings text messages ending every sentence with a x for some reason.
my mobile never rings but non stop text messages.
Yes. Whats this X thing? It baffles me. "
Its the text equivalent of the old ham radio “over” over x |
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I think it just depends on compatibility. With some people the conversation never goes anywhere and doesn't flow very well. With other people our back and forth messages end up slightly overwhelmingly long . An in between is good. |
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"The problem is “us” - couples & single females, by insta deleting a well constructed message only re-affirms that effort is pointless & validates the “hey,hi,how’s you” as when your not going to get a response either way what’s the point of creating something bespoke.
We as a fab community need to respond to these well crafted messages even if it’s a simple “great first message, unfortunately you’re not what we’re looking for right now”, any repeat messages can be deleted if they carry on, but we’ve found that they respect that response and move on.
"
I like this point. Ultimately if you want a certain environment to thrive, individuals need ti help that. And if the vast majority of polite well written messages get ignored, it’s not really cultivating a place where that behaviour is rewards
But on the other hand, I don’t tbh that’s an excuse for shitty messages. And I don’t think anyones owed a reply
But I like the point either way |
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"I don’t think it is. I have really long conversations with people on here x
On message form? Or on the telephone? And inperson? "
I was talking message form but yeah at social events I do too. Only on the phone with FWBs really x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You could also argue that guys have maybe in the past put effort into writing messages only to be ignored. So they think "fuck it....you're getting one line..." Which is quite understandable. |
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"You could also argue that guys have maybe in the past put effort into writing messages only to be ignored. So they think "fuck it....you're getting one line..." Which is quite understandable."
True. I’ll answer hi how are you messages if I like them after looking at their profile. If it’s some sort of sexual message I won’t. |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You could also argue that guys have maybe in the past put effort into writing messages only to be ignored. So they think "fuck it....you're getting one line..." Which is quite understandable."
You may as well just write hello and hope for the best considering this. I do always try and write something original as a first message but it does feel like a waste of time and effort. This is not me complaining and is wrote with respect. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don’t think it is. I have really long conversations with people on here x
On message form? Or on the telephone? And inperson?
I was talking message form but yeah at social events I do too. Only on the phone with FWBs really x "
I understand now.
Cheers |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"we are all forgetting how to speak and have real life conversations, everythings text messages ending every sentence with a x for some reason.
my mobile never rings but non stop text messages.
Yes. Whats this X thing? It baffles me. "
I am a bit at messages like "hi gorgeous xxxx love your milk floats!!!!! Xxx " |
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"Is it a dying art. Reason i ask is, regularly I get messages Hiya how are you. When you reply fine thanks how are you.
I get like either no reply then same person will message hiya how are you 4 weeks later. Or they reply fine thanks, expecting you to drive the conversation. I would expect if you initiate a conversation to be more proactive. "
QUE.?????? |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"we are all forgetting how to speak and have real life conversations, everythings text messages ending every sentence with a x for some reason.
my mobile never rings but non stop text messages.
Yes. Whats this X thing? It baffles me.
I am a bit at messages like "hi gorgeous xxxx love your milk floats!!!!! Xxx " "
Whats with the X's?
Ladies please for us men relief us the pain
|
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"we are all forgetting how to speak and have real life conversations, everythings text messages ending every sentence with a x for some reason.
my mobile never rings but non stop text messages.
Yes. Whats this X thing? It baffles me.
I am a bit at messages like "hi gorgeous xxxx love your milk floats!!!!! Xxx "
Whats with the X's?
Ladies please for us men relief us the pain
"
I don't know what's with the X's. They're a mystery to me |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"we are all forgetting how to speak and have real life conversations, everythings text messages ending every sentence with a x for some reason.
my mobile never rings but non stop text messages.
Yes. Whats this X thing? It baffles me.
I am a bit at messages like "hi gorgeous xxxx love your milk floats!!!!! Xxx "
Whats with the X's?
Ladies please for us men relief us the pain
I don't know what's with the X's. They're a mystery to me"
Feel the same.
I sense X's are used to soften the other end,and to come across as warmly or fondly.
People do very strange with esp when they dont knw the person nor met them
|
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|
By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad!
Mars bars are made in Slough (or were)
Looking at buying in Surrey last year..Slough is rough.
Yeah we aren't looking at buying there "
Its more getting out with all your wheels |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"we are all forgetting how to speak and have real life conversations, everythings text messages ending every sentence with a x for some reason.
my mobile never rings but non stop text messages.
Yes. Whats this X thing? It baffles me.
I am a bit at messages like "hi gorgeous xxxx love your milk floats!!!!! Xxx "
Whats with the X's?
Ladies please for us men relief us the pain
I don't know what's with the X's. They're a mystery to me
Feel the same.
I sense X's are used to soften the other end,and to come across as warmly or fondly.
People do very strange with esp when they dont knw the person nor met them
"
Well it doesn't work. It's just a red flag for me. |
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|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You could also argue that guys have maybe in the past put effort into writing messages only to be ignored. So they think "fuck it....you're getting one line..." Which is quite understandable."
|
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"You could also argue that guys have maybe in the past put effort into writing messages only to be ignored. So they think "fuck it....you're getting one line..." Which is quite understandable"
When I line up for a triathlon. I've never won one, I'm never going to win one. But every time I line up I compete like I expect to win. We accept the price we pay. Some day, everyone in front of me will fall over, or get cramp, or give in, and I will win
Every message I send, I don't expect a reply, I'll either be ignored or receive a thanks, but no thanks. Doesn't stop me trying on the next one. |
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By *lynJMan
over a year ago
Morden |
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad!
Mars bars are made in Slough (or were)
Looking at buying in Surrey last year..Slough is rough.
Yeah we aren't looking at buying there
Its more getting out with all your wheels "
There are some very nice places near Slough. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Throw 'em a curveball, OP.
If they ask how are you, don't say fine, you?
Say Oh thank fuck you messaged: this is an emergency. Look, I can't go into much detail, but I have a van parked up at the multi-storey carpark by the train station in Slough, it's full of coder monkeys. Can you drive a van? Doesn't matter, you can learn on the way, look: meet me there in the next hour. It's of utmost importance.
Obvs check for monkey allergies first.
OMG I would be so excited about this. It sounds like a proper adventure.
Forget "hey", women and couples of Fab are about to be bombarded by messages about car parks in Slough now, given the reaction to this (indeed excellent) post!
On the main Q, I don't think the art of conversation is dying - online or in "real life". Sure, it's easier with some people than others, but that's always been true, and always will be. We just connect better with some than others.
Feel free to mesaage me about car parks in Slough
You know I will! I particularly like the multi-story just by Wernham-Hogg.
*I have never been to Slough.
** Neither have I
Google tells me there is a chocolate factory, so it can't be all bad!
Mars bars are made in Slough (or were)
Looking at buying in Surrey last year..Slough is rough.
Yeah we aren't looking at buying there
Its more getting out with all your wheels
There are some very nice places near Slough."
Was down that way yesterday. Denham,fulmer etc very high class etc.
Many make judgements without any experiences. |
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