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Contacting verifications
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What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't like this. I want someone to get to know me from me, not what someone else thought I liked or didn't like.
Part of the reason I don't display anything but my summary.
I think it's nice you are going to ask his opinion on it first though. Some people may not mind  |
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I’d find that difficult to deal with and I’d find it a bit disconcerting if one of my meets shared info with someone else with regard to the third party arranging a meet.
However you’re doing the best thing by contacting the person you met with to see if they would like any info to be passed on |
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By *B69Woman
over a year ago
Wiltshire |
I’ve had this previously, that’s why mine are hidden, what happened between me and that person is private, I would check with the person involved before you reply to anyone, they might not even be meeting them |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is."
I'd tell them to jog on.
What happens between parties on a meet is between them. If they choose to put something in a veri then that is all that others need to know.
Everyone is different.
Just because something happened or went well on one meet doesn't guarantee it will on the next, or with someone different.
And you'd need serious balls to contact someone asking for details of someone else. What would you do if they turned round and said the meet was average or that something negative happened? How would you know someone wasn't telling fibs - after all there's a fair amount of lamp post pissing goes on here?
If you seriously need to ask what to do I'd be worried if I was one of your meets....
A |
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"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
I'd tell them to jog on.
What happens between parties on a meet is between them. If they choose to put something in a veri then that is all that others need to know.
Everyone is different.
Just because something happened or went well on one meet doesn't guarantee it will on the next, or with someone different.
And you'd need serious balls to contact someone asking for details of someone else. What would you do if they turned round and said the meet was average or that something negative happened? How would you know someone wasn't telling fibs - after all there's a fair amount of lamp post pissing goes on here?
If you seriously need to ask what to do I'd be worried if I was one of your meets....
A"
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It’s nothing to do with anyone else and I would tell them nothing and to find out for themselves.It’s a bit odd isn’t it .
We went to a party once where the person holding it had decided to give our number out to a single man that was at the party if we want someone to have our info we would have given it to him .we ended up having to block his number .
I just think giving anyone any kind of info about someone is wrong on so many levels . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As I said in an earlier thread, someone I used to see regularly told me they’d been contacted by everyone I’d seen since I stopped meeting with them - sadly for them I’m friends with everyone that’s left me a veri so didn’t take long to work out they had contacted everyone first. Passive aggressive behaviour can be commonplace here from time to time.
I definitely wouldn’t share details of any of the meets I’d had with anyone, nor would I expect the people I’ve met to.  |
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I’ve had that a few times in the past but I refused to comment, the dynamics between me and someone might not be the same if he met someone else, I used to say either meet them or don’t it’s as simple as that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is."
But you don’t have any veris  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do find it odd sometimes that someone who has only recently joined, suddenly has a dozen or so verifications..."
More often than not it is someone that has returned, Also from one club night or social I can get 20+ veri's |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do find it odd sometimes that someone who has only recently joined, suddenly has a dozen or so verifications..."
Why? Could be they’ve attended a social event, party or club. |
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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago
Redhill |
I’ve been asked a couple of times… I didn’t mind just saying, yes, they are who they say they are etc- turned up on time, were nice and polite etc.
However, a lady made it a mission to go through my veris and trying to arrange meets with several of them… I didn’t know what to make of it to be honest. I suppose everyone has the freedom to contact someone and make arrangements- it is up to the individuals as the end of the day. |
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I’ve heard this a few times from men having been asked what a meet with me was like, also that they have had ladies mail them saying ‘I see you met Goodnitegirl. I won’t meet you again if you carry on seeing her.
I don’t actually know what is weirder but I think both are rude as heck and I wouldn’t even dream of it never mind DO it!  |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
But you don’t have any veris "
The plot thickens!! 
I suppose that doesn't mean the OP hasn't left any for anyone else but is a tad odd that none of their meets has left one for them in what appears a long time on site.... 
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve heard this a few times from men having been asked what a meet with me was like, also that they have had ladies mail them saying ‘I see you met Goodnitegirl. I won’t meet you again if you carry on seeing her.
I don’t actually know what is weirder but I think both are rude as heck and I wouldn’t even dream of it never mind DO it! "
id meet ya  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is."
It's weird and tbh I'd probably block that profile and message the person they were asking about tell them
This is why I don't show verifications because people always so strange things like this |
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"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
It's weird and tbh I'd probably block that profile and message the person they were asking about tell them
This is why I don't show verifications because people always so strange things like this "
This all said. Is the recipient not as bad if they SHARE details that are more than ‘aye he/she was lovely. Deffo wouldn’t discourage a meet’. Madness isn’t it!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
But you don’t have any veris
The plot thickens!!
I suppose that doesn't mean the OP hasn't left any for anyone else but is a tad odd that none of their meets has left one for them in what appears a long time on site....
A"
You can’t leave a veri if you aren’t verified. |
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Id feel very weird about it. I dont display my veris after one lad i met messaged me a while after i put up his veri telling me he was getting a load of messages from fellas asking what i was like in bed and was i any good what my kik name etc was. I found it really gross tbh |
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I've never done it and I've never had anyone ask about someone I've verified but I've had someone go out of their way to ask someone about me.
When they didn't get the info they wanted they started a thread about me to get around my filters.
I've seen women say that they often contact other women about their verifications and that they do it for safety reasons.
I don't accept that for a second because if someone is displaying a verification they obviously aren't going to tell anyone to avoid them as they are dangerous or nasty.
I've also seen women contact and befriend other women through verifications so that they can keep them close and onside.
On similar threads I've seen people say that they are happy to discuss and recommend people they have verified.
I'm not comfortable with networking without consent. Not everyone wants to be recommended or discussed with people they've never spoken to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
It's weird and tbh I'd probably block that profile and message the person they were asking about tell them
This is why I don't show verifications because people always so strange things like this
This all said. Is the recipient not as bad if they SHARE details that are more than ‘aye he/she was lovely. Deffo wouldn’t discourage a meet’. Madness isn’t it!!"
No, I've been in that situation and it's weird and scary. We were in bed afterwards and he told me that he had messaged 'x' before hand and was told personal information about me.
It shouldn't be done under any circumstances, verifications should be to prove someone is a genuine person plus being 'lovely' is subjective |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Id feel very weird about it. I dont display my veris after one lad i met messaged me a while after i put up his veri telling me he was getting a load of messages from fellas asking what i was like in bed and was i any good what my kik name etc was. I found it really gross tbh"
This
Plus it makes you feel so vulnerable |
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"Id feel very weird about it. I dont display my veris after one lad i met messaged me a while after i put up his veri telling me he was getting a load of messages from fellas asking what i was like in bed and was i any good what my kik name etc was. I found it really gross tbh
This
Plus it makes you feel so vulnerable "
Its extremely unsettling knowing people are trying to get info on you. Now i dont have kik or the like but you dont go asking people for another persons personal acc name etc on other apps. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
But you don’t have any veris
The plot thickens!!
I suppose that doesn't mean the OP hasn't left any for anyone else but is a tad odd that none of their meets has left one for them in what appears a long time on site....
A
You can’t leave a veri if you aren’t verified."
Fuck me I'm being blonde today....of course you can't. 
A
*apologies to any blondes who may have been offended by that comment. I don't have any hair. Blonde or otherwise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
But you don’t have any veris
The plot thickens!!
I suppose that doesn't mean the OP hasn't left any for anyone else but is a tad odd that none of their meets has left one for them in what appears a long time on site....
A
You can’t leave a veri if you aren’t verified.
Fuck me I'm being blonde today....of course you can't.
A
*apologies to any blondes who may have been offended by that comment. I don't have any hair. Blonde or otherwise."
There may be more to this story |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
But you don’t have any veris
The plot thickens!!
I suppose that doesn't mean the OP hasn't left any for anyone else but is a tad odd that none of their meets has left one for them in what appears a long time on site....
A"
Maybe they are considering messaging someone else's veri for more information but are asking about it before doing so |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Mine are all hidden but I'd tell them to do one.
Whatever happened to discretion?
I wondered about hiding mine. Thought it might have made look like I was hiding something x"
You can hide individual verifications but keep your verification summary on your profile so people can still see that you've met etc |
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"Mine are all hidden but I'd tell them to do one.
Whatever happened to discretion?
I wondered about hiding mine. Thought it might have made look like I was hiding something x
You can hide individual verifications but keep your verification summary on your profile so people can still see that you've met etc"
Oh. Got to say, I've never really bothered looking at mine  x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You can’t leave a veri if you aren’t verified.
Genuinely didn’t know this How would you get around it if neither of you were verified?"
you don't. Or you wait until one of you meets a verified person. |
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"You can’t leave a veri if you aren’t verified.
Genuinely didn’t know this How would you get around it if neither of you were verified?"
Yep. You have to get verified, before you can reciprocate. Bizarre x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It’s nothing to do with anyone else and I would tell them nothing and to find out for themselves.It’s a bit odd isn’t it .
We went to a party once where the person holding it had decided to give our number out to a single man that was at the party if we want someone to have our info we would have given it to him .we ended up having to block his number .
I just think giving anyone any kind of info about someone is wrong on so many levels ."
That's awful!!  |
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"You can’t leave a veri if you aren’t verified.
Genuinely didn’t know this How would you get around it if neither of you were verified?
Yep. You have to get verified, before you can reciprocate. Bizarre x"
It's one of the best rules on fab. Imagine how many fake profile threads there would be if you were able to verify at will! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You can’t leave a veri if you aren’t verified.
Genuinely didn’t know this How would you get around it if neither of you were verified?
Yep. You have to get verified, before you can reciprocate. Bizarre x
It's one of the best rules on fab. Imagine how many fake profile threads there would be if you were able to verify at will!"
Haha good point, hadn’t considered that!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
But you don’t have any veris
The plot thickens!!
I suppose that doesn't mean the OP hasn't left any for anyone else but is a tad odd that none of their meets has left one for them in what appears a long time on site....
A
Maybe they are considering messaging someone else's veri for more information but are asking about it before doing so "
That probably is what’s happening but that isn’t what they’ve said in the OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You can’t leave a veri if you aren’t verified.
Genuinely didn’t know this How would you get around it if neither of you were verified?"
It's usually suggested that one of you go on cams and try and get a verification that why so you can verify someone else |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is the etiquette about contacting peoples verifications? I’ve been contacted asking what my meet with X person was like, what he liked and if there was anything I noticed that really turned him on so that they could impress.
Personally I don’t see it as a bad thing as long there’s no personal info shared. I’m going to ask the guy I met what his thoughts are but interested to see the general consensus is.
But you don’t have any veris
The plot thickens!!
I suppose that doesn't mean the OP hasn't left any for anyone else but is a tad odd that none of their meets has left one for them in what appears a long time on site....
A
Maybe they are considering messaging someone else's veri for more information but are asking about it before doing so
That probably is what’s happening but that isn’t what they’ve said in the OP."
Ah I didn't read the initial comment properly.
Ignore me! |
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"You can’t leave a veri if you aren’t verified.
Genuinely didn’t know this How would you get around it if neither of you were verified?
Yep. You have to get verified, before you can reciprocate. Bizarre x
It's one of the best rules on fab. Imagine how many fake profile threads there would be if you were able to verify at will!"
Makes sense |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To be fair I’ve had two people contact me to tell me that the people have died (via going through their veris) but that’s a different kettle of fish I suppose.
GG. X"
No this is different and in this instance I would like to be messaged and told
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I think it's a low and scummy thing to do if I'm honest. I was contacted by a woman through a Veri I left for someone else. To tell me that I should no longer meet the person because they wanted to meet him.
I don't give out info about anyone and I don't expect anyone I have veried to give out info either. If they did I would have zero time for them or the person who asked.
I don't understand the mentality of people who feel the need to go sleuthing on here about others and I understand less the people who are more than willing to give out info . |
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Their motives sound genuine but I don't display our verifications as we've had people contact our previous meets asking them to say they know them and put in a good word for them, which to be honest I think is creepy |
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"I don't like this. I want someone to get to know me from me, not what someone else thought I liked or didn't like.
Part of the reason I don't display anything but my summary.
I think it's nice you are going to ask his opinion on it first though. Some people may not mind "
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
In the unlikely event that this happened, I'd be ignoring, blocking and warning the other person.
However, I'm aware that people have contacted verifications, where they were already an acquaintance. So there's probably some context needed to individual cases. |
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