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The cause of our social anxieties

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By *unandgamegeek OP   Man  over a year ago

Bolton

I'm sure when many of us joined the swinging scene, we all had some form of social anxiety but what was the main cause of these anxieties?

I think my social anxieties stemmed from this fear of being judged. I think it started back when I was at school. I was bullied, teased, called horrid names based on my looks or my autism. "Woodsider" was the worst one.

Those were certainly awful moments for me at school. For years I thought I was ugly and would never be liked or get a girlfriend etc. It got so bad that I nearly did something I shouldn't.

Thank goodness I no longer think like that as I have good friends who I've met either at Cupids or on Fab who have been there for me whenever I felt down.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm sure when many of us joined the swinging scene, we all had some form of social anxiety but what was the main cause of these anxieties?

I think my social anxieties stemmed from this fear of being judged. I think it started back when I was at school. I was bullied, teased, called horrid names based on my looks or my autism. "Woodsider" was the worst one.

Those were certainly awful moments for me at school. For years I thought I was ugly and would never be liked or get a girlfriend etc. It got so bad that I nearly did something I shouldn't.

Thank goodness I no longer think like that as I have good friends who I've met either at Cupids or on Fab who have been there for me whenever I felt down."

Definitely can relate.

I always have this social anxiety and feel I won't fit in wherever I go.

That said I was made to feel most welcome first time I went alone to a club and don't feel so anxious because I know their will be friends, acquaintances and playmates

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By *unandgamegeek OP   Man  over a year ago

Bolton


"I'm sure when many of us joined the swinging scene, we all had some form of social anxiety but what was the main cause of these anxieties?

I think my social anxieties stemmed from this fear of being judged. I think it started back when I was at school. I was bullied, teased, called horrid names based on my looks or my autism. "Woodsider" was the worst one.

Those were certainly awful moments for me at school. For years I thought I was ugly and would never be liked or get a girlfriend etc. It got so bad that I nearly did something I shouldn't.

Thank goodness I no longer think like that as I have good friends who I've met either at Cupids or on Fab who have been there for me whenever I felt down.

Definitely can relate.

I always have this social anxiety and feel I won't fit in wherever I go.

That said I was made to feel most welcome first time I went alone to a club and don't feel so anxious because I know their will be friends, acquaintances and playmates "

I agree. I've always been grateful of the friends I've made over the past 5 years as if it weren't for them, I wouldn't be here.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I hate social situations.

I feel like I don't fit in, that I'm not good enough. I have my lovely ex to thank for that.

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By *ora the explorerWoman  over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Sorry to read that op. Must have been really difficult going through that

Socially I don’t have any anxieties really. I pretty much speak to anyone and I’ve always been very social. Im not in the “scene”‘really but I’ve always been so nervous at one to one socials. Not sure why, I think it’s the whole fab thing. If I met someone in a pub I’d have no problem chatting one to one. Really don’t know why I’m like this as I’m not a shy, nervous person. It could also be that I was with the same person for over 30 years so I’m just not used to it. Who knows! x

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By *unandgamegeek OP   Man  over a year ago

Bolton


"I hate social situations.

I feel like I don't fit in, that I'm not good enough. I have my lovely ex to thank for that.

"

That's awful. No one should feel like they don't fit in or they ain't good enough.

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By *unandgamegeek OP   Man  over a year ago

Bolton


"Sorry to read that op. Must have been really difficult going through that

Socially I don’t have any anxieties really. I pretty much speak to anyone and I’ve always been very social. Im not in the “scene”‘really but I’ve always been so nervous at one to one socials. Not sure why, I think it’s the whole fab thing. If I met someone in a pub I’d have no problem chatting one to one. Really don’t know why I’m like this as I’m not a shy, nervous person. It could also be that I was with the same person for over 30 years so I’m just not used to it. Who knows! x "

Yeah. I've no problem chatting with someone one to one at a bar. It's just chatting at a club that can be a bit iffy sometimes.

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