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The bits we don't love... the comeback
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"Interesting. I don't have a full body mirror, for similar reasons. I am, however, fairly confident. I wish I could look like some of the hunks on here, and have women flooding my inbox, sometimes. But I don't, but I do have some wonderful friends on my list. For that, I am grateful x"That's pretty much all anyone can ask for... wonderful people in their life  | |||
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"Fabbed it because I CAN see what you WANT to see in yourself. You'll get there Posh. One day at a time xxx" I do have a rather delightful curve to my left calf in that picture... 
Thank you C. I hope so xxx | |||
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"Fabbed it because I CAN see what you WANT to see in yourself. You'll get there Posh. One day at a time xxx" I'd fabbed posh ages ago . Be who you are, always x | |||
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You are an incredible woman
Let me join your relationship and I’ll be an excellent 3rd wheel | |||
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"I love you even more than I did before
You are an incredible woman
Let me join your relationship and I’ll be an excellent 3rd wheel "Can I come? x | |||
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"I love you even more than I did before
You are an incredible woman
Let me join your relationship and I’ll be an excellent 3rd wheel
Can I come? x"No | |||
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"It's not really one bit but my size and shape. I spent 25 + years training after being bullied for being skinny as a kid and I hated it. 112kg at my biggest and in good shape. Injured last year dropped to 94kg, now back to 100kg. I really dont have the drive to get back to 112kg. It's taken me 6 months or more to accept the new norm but I think I'm getting there." I got injured, so my muscles went, replaced by a spot of fat  . Can't go to the gym anymore as I have damaged most of my major muscles. Is what it is | |||
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"I love you even more than I did before
You are an incredible woman
Let me join your relationship and I’ll be an excellent 3rd wheel
Can I come? x
No "Ouch  xx | |||
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"I love you even more than I did before
You are an incredible woman
Let me join your relationship and I’ll be an excellent 3rd wheel "Oh you  you're just so lovely!
I'm not incredible. I'm just me. Just a human bean and actually a bit of a twat. But quite frankly I want people to have a bit more love for themselves, and to glory in their bodies, even the bits they don't love. If me being nekkid on t'internet makes even one person feel better about their body... I've scored!
(Except when I get the weird looks up Tesco from people who have now seen my rolls and fandango. That's always hilarious)
Love you too ... but I'm absolutely not sharing him (yeah, I'm a crap swinger) xxx | |||
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"It's not really one bit but my size and shape. I spent 25 + years training after being bullied for being skinny as a kid and I hated it. 112kg at my biggest and in good shape. Injured last year dropped to 94kg, now back to 100kg. I really dont have the drive to get back to 112kg. It's taken me 6 months or more to accept the new norm but I think I'm getting there." I hope you can accept it. And not having the drive is, I guess, a form of acceptance really. Or at least a step on the journey. I hope your injury is at least recovered. And you can find the parts you're happy with  | |||
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I'm actually not that bad looking, really.
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"Fabbed it because I CAN see what you WANT to see in yourself. You'll get there Posh. One day at a time xxx I do have a rather delightful curve to my left calf in that picture...
Thank you C. I hope so xxx"I know you will, as I can see the difference in your words, of how YOU are describing yourself, you are already a way on this journey even if you haven't realised it x Are you keeping a journal? | |||
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"I've never had body dysmorphia but there are parts I don't like as much as others. I wish I wasn't so pale with a face like a constipated tomato and obviously I wish my body was as young as my mind but generally I don't hate any of it. It's easy for some to say we should embrace our flaws but as you have already said it's much easier to embrace someone else's flaws. For too long I wasn't concerned with how I looked to others because I was totally convinced I was invisible. Then I wondered for those that could see me what did they see and was it different to what I saw? Then I realised it was all in my head and I was never invisible but that took many years and everything else has been a bonus since. " Ok... I'm having trouble picturing a constipated tomato. Especially one with such a delightful jawline. There have been many, many times in my life when I've wished to be invisible (not just from a wouldn't it be easy to perve on the gorgeous naked men in the rugby club changing rooms stance), I've been the person people point and laugh at, talk about behind my back, and get snarky comments from strangers. So on many occasions invisible would have been a blessing. But I imagine feeling that way is probably as sould destroying as from my perspective. I love reading that you're making it on the journey to self acceptance, you know I think you're rather fabulous. | |||
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I’ve never liked my belly either- not even at my fittest. I’d have plastic surgery if I weren’t so terrified of anesthesia haha (and if I had the money, lol)
I remember your previous post, Posh. Loved it and love this too. I think you’re great. | |||
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I look similar to you but without the lovely face. | |||
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You also know I feel exactly the same about myself as you do. Back in January when we spent hours taking photos of ourselves, that's exactly how the convo went - me telling you you were beautiful, you telling me the same & neither of us believing it. We need to believe what folk tell us.
We tell ourselves that guys only pretend to like us 'cos they want a shag - how could they possibly find this lump of lard attractive?
Well, you've motivated me to put up an old pic of me, rolls of fat & all. I've lost a little weight since then but I'm still pretty fat. I still hate my stomach & as you can see, I am, of course, hiding it. I sigh when I think back to my 20's how, as a size 8/10, I hated my belly even then.
Sorry for rambling Posh. I don't often open up like this, I'm just hoping I can finally learn to love my body. Or at least be able to look at it in a mirror.
x
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"I think the best way of accepting one's body is to stop the incessant focusing on it " Helpful as ever | |||
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"For me it is my gut and height. People dont really like short guys, there is a reason why there is a short man complex but not a tall man complex. My gut has always been large. I used to train 6 days a week and it was always there, never been able to shift it." Bodies are strange, aren't they. Even when I was at my fittest, when life was pretty much work, work out, more work, my belly wouldn't shift either. I'm sure someone will have an answer as to why that is... I think that height is a difficult one. There are a lot of people who have no preference about tall or short guys, but I think that because it is something that it isn't possible to change, people do focus on it more. I wish I had a better answer | |||
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"I think the best way of accepting one's body is to stop the incessant focusing on it " • Cheers.  | |||
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"I think the best way of accepting one's body is to stop the incessant focusing on it Helpful as ever "Not everyone has to go about things in the same way | |||
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"I'm marking this thread as: •Liked •Loved •Hugged"
Getting there slowly Nero  | |||
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"I think the best way of accepting one's body is to stop the incessant focusing on it Helpful as ever "Ach I don't know. Maybe she means we should just start living. Rather than spending our time focusing on it and thinking about it, if we got out there and lived our body acceptance would grow because we wouldn't be overthinking it. Overthinking is an effective way of killing any body acceptance. There's some truth to that (for me anyway!). | |||
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"It's a journey, but you'll get there eventually. And any sort of positive progress is progress, no matter how long it takes. I'm all for body acceptance. I have good days and bad days, but I do believe being kind to yourself makes a huge difference. It's really changed how I look at myself. I used to be so fucking cruel to myself because I thought my body determined my worth... but that's so far from the truth and once you realise that your mindset does change. I've said it before and I'll say it again, if anyone judges YOUR appearance in a negative way they are uglier than any part of your physical appearance could ever be. " So true, Lemon
It's funny how I don't judge anyone else on their appearance, so why judge myself so harshly? X | |||
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"I love you even more than I did before
You are an incredible woman
Let me join your relationship and I’ll be an excellent 3rd wheel
Oh you you're just so lovely!
I'm not incredible. I'm just me. Just a human bean and actually a bit of a twat. But quite frankly I want people to have a bit more love for themselves, and to glory in their bodies, even the bits they don't love. If me being nekkid on t'internet makes even one person feel better about their body... I've scored!
(Except when I get the weird looks up Tesco from people who have now seen my rolls and fandango. That's always hilarious)
Love you too ... but I'm absolutely not sharing him (yeah, I'm a crap swinger) xxx"I’m more into you anyway - so that works for me | |||
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"I think the best way of accepting one's body is to stop the incessant focusing on it Helpful as ever
Not everyone has to go about things in the same way "True …. but, a little bit of consideration helps. It’s easier said than done to stop the incessant focusing - isn’t it? | |||
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"It's a journey, but you'll get there eventually. And any sort of positive progress is progress, no matter how long it takes. I'm all for body acceptance. I have good days and bad days, but I do believe being kind to yourself makes a huge difference. It's really changed how I look at myself. I used to be so fucking cruel to myself because I thought my body determined my worth... but that's so far from the truth and once you realise that your mindset does change. I've said it before and I'll say it again, if anyone judges YOUR appearance in a negative way they are uglier than any part of your physical appearance could ever be. So true, Lemon
It's funny how I don't judge anyone else on their appearance, so why judge myself so harshly? X"Yes exactly! I do think we are our own worst critic. It's quite liberating when you realise that. | |||
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"I think the best way of accepting one's body is to stop the incessant focusing on it Helpful as ever
Not everyone has to go about things in the same way
True …. but, a little bit of consideration helps. It’s easier said than done to stop the incessant focusing - isn’t it? " | |||
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"We do need to be kinder to others - I've had an interesting conversation with a friend very recently (yep, #youknowwhoyouare) about how we should see the beauty in others. Be as kind to ourselves as we should to others. That's what resonates with me. It's easy for us to embrace the flaws of those we love, maybe we should extend that out. Include ourselves in that. So, physically, I'm on a long journey to improve myself but also improve the relationship I have with my body. I'm fat. There's no denying that, it's been weaponized by those who aren't my biggest fans, loved by those who cheerleader me on. I'm getting to the point where I actually like my softness. My chubbiness. A good friend of mine says my body is like the embodiment of a fertility deity and I'm at the point where I'm embracing that. I can't waste all my years hating myself; while I'm still relatively young I intend to enjoy it. Take photos. Do things where I'm seen by people and celebrate their bodies as much as my own. Wear clothes because they make me feel good. Be naked and enjoy that. Who knows, I might even make it to a club soon just for the sheer delight of being naked in all my chubby galore.
I'm actually not that bad looking, really.
"This acceptance, moving to love, of your body, is a glorious thing. It's what I wish I could find and it cheers me that you're finding that in your relative youth. We should treat ourselves as we do our friends. But yet so many of us can't or won't. Years of being put down, given not just backhanded compliments but ones delivered with a massive punch in the face/stab in the heart combo (the classic "you'd be beautiful if you lost a few stone" for example), and of course the fact that we are trained that vanity is bad and self love is vanity all add together to make it difficult or impossible. One of my reasons for hating my body has a great deal to do with fertility, so I can't embrace that idea, but I'm glad to hear it is giving you positivity. | |||
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I am happy to read that you are making progress. That is all that matters.
I have had issues with how I look all my life. From as young as I can remember. Not pretty enough. Not tall enough. Too much weight. And everything in between.
But life is a lesson and we have to take what we can from it. I have learnt that My body is mine and its doing its best. The best I can do is look after it and nurture it to the best of my abilities. Like you ill health is trying to destroy me from the inside out and meditation has its affects on our bodies too. I honestly believe that it starts with mental healing and alot of not listening to the little devil on your shoulders.
I believe you can do this Posh. You have the strength to do so.
Little steps are still progress.
Jo.Xx | |||
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"I think the best way of accepting one's body is to stop the incessant focusing on it " Hard to do when others focus on it for you so often. But if you can, then that can only be a good thing. | |||
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"We do need to be kinder to others - I've had an interesting conversation with a friend very recently (yep, #youknowwhoyouare) about how we should see the beauty in others. Be as kind to ourselves as we should to others. That's what resonates with me. It's easy for us to embrace the flaws of those we love, maybe we should extend that out. Include ourselves in that. So, physically, I'm on a long journey to improve myself but also improve the relationship I have with my body. I'm fat. There's no denying that, it's been weaponized by those who aren't my biggest fans, loved by those who cheerleader me on. I'm getting to the point where I actually like my softness. My chubbiness. A good friend of mine says my body is like the embodiment of a fertility deity and I'm at the point where I'm embracing that. I can't waste all my years hating myself; while I'm still relatively young I intend to enjoy it. Take photos. Do things where I'm seen by people and celebrate their bodies as much as my own. Wear clothes because they make me feel good. Be naked and enjoy that. Who knows, I might even make it to a club soon just for the sheer delight of being naked in all my chubby galore.
I'm actually not that bad looking, really.
"You’re utterly pretty | |||
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"Fabbed it because I CAN see what you WANT to see in yourself. You'll get there Posh. One day at a time xxx I do have a rather delightful curve to my left calf in that picture...
Thank you C. I hope so xxx
I know you will, as I can see the difference in your words, of how YOU are describing yourself, you are already a way on this journey even if you haven't realised it x
Are you keeping a journal?"Well... I have one... I should probably get back to doing that at some point. I'm making steps. A lot of them are backwards, but I'm trying to think of those as not actually going backwards but more retracing to really drive home the point. If that made any sense | |||
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"My T-Shirt says it all!" You, Aitch, are lovely. And one day I hope that t-shirt will say "don't" | |||
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"Morning beautiful!
I am happy to read that you are making progress. That is all that matters.
I have had issues with how I look all my life. From as young as I can remember. Not pretty enough. Not tall enough. Too much weight. And everything in between.
But life is a lesson and we have to take what we can from it. I have learnt that My body is mine and its doing its best. The best I can do is look after it and nurture it to the best of my abilities. Like you ill health is trying to destroy me from the inside out and *medication has its affects on our bodies too. I honestly believe that it starts with mental healing and alot of not listening to the little devil on your shoulders.
I believe you can do this Posh. You have the strength to do so.
Little steps are still progress.
Jo.Xx "*Ooops Meditation has helped actually!! 
Jo.Xx | |||
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"I was pretty happy with my body until this last year. I’ve never liked my belly either- not even at my fittest. I’d have plastic surgery if I weren’t so terrified of anesthesia haha (and if I had the money, lol)
I remember your previous post, Posh. Loved it and love this too. I think you’re great. "Oh Alice, thank you, you beautiful woman. I like to do a repeat every now and then, because I think sometimes we need to reflect on where we were, where we are and the times in between. I think you have a beautiful body, and your smile lights up the dark
I'd happily have surgery... I love an anaesthetic. Just to find the funds! | |||
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"I can't waste all my years hating myself; while I'm still relatively young I intend to enjoy it. Take photos. Do things where I'm seen by people and celebrate their bodies as much as my own. Wear clothes because they make me feel good. Be naked and enjoy that. Who knows, I might even make it to a club soon just for the sheer delight of being naked in all my chubby galore.
I'm actually not that bad looking, really.
You’re utterly pretty " Thank you. The urge to say in real life I'm really quite ugly was strong but... no. No more. Thanks Floro. | |||
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"I can't waste all my years hating myself; while I'm still relatively young I intend to enjoy it. Take photos. Do things where I'm seen by people and celebrate their bodies as much as my own. Wear clothes because they make me feel good. Be naked and enjoy that. Who knows, I might even make it to a club soon just for the sheer delight of being naked in all my chubby galore.
I'm actually not that bad looking, really.
You’re utterly pretty
Thank you. The urge to say in real life I'm really quite ugly was strong but... no. No more. Thanks Floro. "I say that ALL the time !!!! I need to change it And you’re so so welcome | |||
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"I can't waste all my years hating myself; while I'm still relatively young I intend to enjoy it. Take photos. Do things where I'm seen by people and celebrate their bodies as much as my own. Wear clothes because they make me feel good. Be naked and enjoy that. Who knows, I might even make it to a club soon just for the sheer delight of being naked in all my chubby galore.
I'm actually not that bad looking, really.
You’re utterly pretty
Thank you. The urge to say in real life I'm really quite ugly was strong but... no. No more. Thanks Floro.
I say that ALL the time !!!!
I need to change it
And you’re so so welcome "You do need to change it! It's not a healthy narrative to have - it's not true and you're doing yourself a huge disservice. It's not easy to change though is it? I'm lucky I have a very blunt shovel hands who reminds me I'm being an emo frizz when I say I'm ugly. | |||
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"I luv you posh I look similar to you but without the lovely face."You put yourself down too much SD. I don't see lovely in my face, but thank you for saying that. You do have a lovely face... and sparkly eyes when you are happy. I recall that from April | |||
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"We do need to be kinder to others - I've had an interesting conversation with a friend very recently (yep, #youknowwhoyouare) about how we should see the beauty in others. Be as kind to ourselves as we should to others. That's what resonates with me. It's easy for us to embrace the flaws of those we love, maybe we should extend that out. Include ourselves in that. So, physically, I'm on a long journey to improve myself but also improve the relationship I have with my body. I'm fat. There's no denying that, it's been weaponized by those who aren't my biggest fans, loved by those who cheerleader me on. I'm getting to the point where I actually like my softness. My chubbiness. A good friend of mine says my body is like the embodiment of a fertility deity and I'm at the point where I'm embracing that. I can't waste all my years hating myself; while I'm still relatively young I intend to enjoy it. Take photos. Do things where I'm seen by people and celebrate their bodies as much as my own. Wear clothes because they make me feel good. Be naked and enjoy that. Who knows, I might even make it to a club soon just for the sheer delight of being naked in all my chubby galore.
I'm actually not that bad looking, really.
"Many things resonated in this post Meli and we all have room for improvement in how we treat ourselves and others. This thread is a great source for reflection today. | |||
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"Posh, you know I love you .
You also know I feel exactly the same about myself as you do. Back in January when we spent hours taking photos of ourselves, that's exactly how the convo went - me telling you you were beautiful, you telling me the same & neither of us believing it. We need to believe what folk tell us.
We tell ourselves that guys only pretend to like us 'cos they want a shag - how could they possibly find this lump of lard attractive?
Well, you've motivated me to put up an old pic of me, rolls of fat & all. I've lost a little weight since then but I'm still pretty fat. I still hate my stomach & as you can see, I am, of course, hiding it. I sigh when I think back to my 20's how, as a size 8/10, I hated my belly even then.
Sorry for rambling Posh. I don't often open up like this, I'm just hoping I can finally learn to love my body. Or at least be able to look at it in a mirror.
x
"I'm not going to say much in return, except I love you too , that is a beautiful picture, and you'd best prepare because I'm bringing the camera | |||
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"I can't waste all my years hating myself; while I'm still relatively young I intend to enjoy it. Take photos. Do things where I'm seen by people and celebrate their bodies as much as my own. Wear clothes because they make me feel good. Be naked and enjoy that. Who knows, I might even make it to a club soon just for the sheer delight of being naked in all my chubby galore.
I'm actually not that bad looking, really.
You’re utterly pretty
Thank you. The urge to say in real life I'm really quite ugly was strong but... no. No more. Thanks Floro.
I say that ALL the time !!!!
I need to change it
And you’re so so welcome
You do need to change it! It's not a healthy narrative to have - it's not true and you're doing yourself a huge disservice. It's not easy to change though is it?
I'm lucky I have a very blunt shovel hands who reminds me I'm being an emo frizz when I say I'm ugly. "I feel like if I meet someone I need constant reassurance that I am in fact, ok on the eye. | |||
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The bits that I would fix I broke in the first place so  | |||
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"My T-Shirt says it all! You, Aitch, are lovely. And one day I hope that t-shirt will say "don't"" Aww thank you. You look fantastic. I don't really hate myself. I am what I am. I've lost almost 2 stones in the last year, so not doing too bad. I bought that t-shirt as a statement about a situation I found myself in that caused a lot of upset with my friends and was all my fault. | |||
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"It's a journey, but you'll get there eventually. And any sort of positive progress is progress, no matter how long it takes. I'm all for body acceptance. I have good days and bad days, but I do believe being kind to yourself makes a huge difference. It's really changed how I look at myself. I used to be so fucking cruel to myself because I thought my body determined my worth... but that's so far from the truth and once you realise that your mindset does change. I've said it before and I'll say it again, if anyone judges YOUR appearance in a negative way they are uglier than any part of your physical appearance could ever be. " You are, and have been as long as we have both been here, one of my confidence heroes LBC. And you rock | |||
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"I can't waste all my years hating myself; while I'm still relatively young I intend to enjoy it. Take photos. Do things where I'm seen by people and celebrate their bodies as much as my own. Wear clothes because they make me feel good. Be naked and enjoy that. Who knows, I might even make it to a club soon just for the sheer delight of being naked in all my chubby galore.
I'm actually not that bad looking, really.
You’re utterly pretty
Thank you. The urge to say in real life I'm really quite ugly was strong but... no. No more. Thanks Floro.
I say that ALL the time !!!!
I need to change it
And you’re so so welcome
You do need to change it! It's not a healthy narrative to have - it's not true and you're doing yourself a huge disservice. It's not easy to change though is it?
I'm lucky I have a very blunt shovel hands who reminds me I'm being an emo frizz when I say I'm ugly.
I feel like if I meet someone I need constant reassurance that I am in fact, ok on the eye.
"That's the weird thing with me Floor, if Im with someone, like in a relationship or on a date etc, I DON'T need constant reassurance. I readily accept that they find me attractive. I'm weird | |||
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"Thanks Posh for this thread. It's not always easy to not care about how you look and be conscious of that. Just in the same way it's not easy to be told to "cheer up" when you feeling down. You're working on yourself and that's all that matters. Baby steps are still steps in the right direction however small they may be "Earlier I was reading through the first one of these threads that I posted (about 150 years ago), and I came across a post where I said that we should drag each other along the journey kicking and screaming (or something like that). I think we do
Steps are all important gorgeous | |||
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"I have a lot of respect for anyone who can post a picture of themselves for others to see, esp if the poster perceives flaws or is worried about being judged. I have rarely posted a full body pic, let alone naked and very few people have seen me naked. Maybe a reason I never had the confidence to try a club or sauna. Some of my body issues are medical that can't do anything about, sone are mental that take continuous work. I was even scared of posting my profile pic here as the outfit does not conceal much. So bravo to those who do what I can't " Aw, bless you. It took me a helluva long time to post my first semi naked photo & almost a year & a half before I went full naked. But the strange thing is, it did help me. Stick with it, it is a constant battle but you've posted on this thread, so you're on that journey. Like everyone else, please try not to be so hard on yourself
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"I love you even more than I did before
You are an incredible woman
Let me join your relationship and I’ll be an excellent 3rd wheel
Oh you you're just so lovely!
I'm not incredible. I'm just me. Just a human bean and actually a bit of a twat. But quite frankly I want people to have a bit more love for themselves, and to glory in their bodies, even the bits they don't love. If me being nekkid on t'internet makes even one person feel better about their body... I've scored!
(Except when I get the weird looks up Tesco from people who have now seen my rolls and fandango. That's always hilarious)
Love you too ... but I'm absolutely not sharing him (yeah, I'm a crap swinger) xxx
I’m more into you anyway - so that works for me " that I can work with | |||
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"Posh, you know I love you .
You also know I feel exactly the same about myself as you do. Back in January when we spent hours taking photos of ourselves, that's exactly how the convo went - me telling you you were beautiful, you telling me the same & neither of us believing it. We need to believe what folk tell us.
We tell ourselves that guys only pretend to like us 'cos they want a shag - how could they possibly find this lump of lard attractive?
Well, you've motivated me to put up an old pic of me, rolls of fat & all. I've lost a little weight since then but I'm still pretty fat. I still hate my stomach & as you can see, I am, of course, hiding it. I sigh when I think back to my 20's how, as a size 8/10, I hated my belly even then.
Sorry for rambling Posh. I don't often open up like this, I'm just hoping I can finally learn to love my body. Or at least be able to look at it in a mirror.
x
I'm not going to say much in return, except I love you too , that is a beautiful picture, and you'd best prepare because I'm bringing the camera " | |||
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"Thanks Posh for this thread. It's not always easy to not care about how you look and be conscious of that. Just in the same way it's not easy to be told to "cheer up" when you feeling down. You're working on yourself and that's all that matters. Baby steps are still steps in the right direction however small they may be
Earlier I was reading through the first one of these threads that I posted (about 150 years ago), and I came across a post where I said that we should drag each other along the journey kicking and screaming (or something like that). I think we do
Steps are all important gorgeous"I think if we had a time machine and went back to that point and saw how much we've changed we would be amazed and think it wasn't possible. Sometimes we need to reflect how far we've come not how far we've yet to go (talking generally now) | |||
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"Morning beautiful!
I am happy to read that you are making progress. That is all that matters.
I have had issues with how I look all my life. From as young as I can remember. Not pretty enough. Not tall enough. Too much weight. And everything in between.
But life is a lesson and we have to take what we can from it. I have learnt that My body is mine and its doing its best. The best I can do is look after it and nurture it to the best of my abilities. Like you ill health is trying to destroy me from the inside out and meditation has its affects on our bodies too. I honestly believe that it starts with mental healing and alot of not listening to the little devil on your shoulders.
I believe you can do this Posh. You have the strength to do so.
Little steps are still progress.
Jo.Xx "I adore you, and your strength and determination is absolutely an inspiration to me. A lot of the self reflection I do manage is inspired by some of the women of the Lounge, and you are definitely one of those women. Mental health and the positive mindset is so very important, and is the main barrier in the way of not only self acceptance and love, but actually in the way of making lifestyle changes if you want to. Knowing that has been a big step. | |||
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"I'm a trans male, very masculine. Hated myself for a long time, finally transitioned and started to love myself. Then I started receiving a whole different kind of hate from people who never hated me before. For the way I look, my body, for what I am. I finally got to a point where I couldn't give a flying arse what people think. Got a lot of "straight" men messaging me, for their kink or for their curiosity. I'd tell them "you're not straight if you're messaging me", with my bearded face, hairy body and tattoos. It just enraged them and I got called x y and z. I think there is a lot of social pressure to conform. Gender roles are f*cking boring and more people need to just love humans for the sake of them being humans. Yes we all have crap, we all have kinks, attractions etc... but self love is the most important love and that can be found theough others and within yourself 3 " Sounds like you've reached a level of acceptance and self love you're happy with... and managing to ignore those who would put you down... this is awesome! | |||
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"I’m just sad that theres only one of me, the world is a much duller place for it
The bits that I would fix I broke in the first place so "I'm sad there is only one of you too. Not least because two of you in a room could be comedy gold!  | |||
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"My T-Shirt says it all! You, Aitch, are lovely. And one day I hope that t-shirt will say "don't" Aww thank you. You look fantastic. I don't really hate myself. I am what I am. I've lost almost 2 stones in the last year, so not doing too bad. I bought that t-shirt as a statement about a situation I found myself in that caused a lot of upset with my friends and was all my fault." Ahhhh... well... whatever it was, don't do it again!  | |||
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"Thanks Posh for this thread. It's not always easy to not care about how you look and be conscious of that. Just in the same way it's not easy to be told to "cheer up" when you feeling down. You're working on yourself and that's all that matters. Baby steps are still steps in the right direction however small they may be
Earlier I was reading through the first one of these threads that I posted (about 150 years ago), and I came across a post where I said that we should drag each other along the journey kicking and screaming (or something like that). I think we do
Steps are all important gorgeous"Thanks for taking the time to reply | |||
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"I have a lot of respect for anyone who can post a picture of themselves for others to see, esp if the poster perceives flaws or is worried about being judged. I have rarely posted a full body pic, let alone naked and very few people have seen me naked. Maybe a reason I never had the confidence to try a club or sauna. Some of my body issues are medical that can't do anything about, sone are mental that take continuous work. I was even scared of posting my profile pic here as the outfit does not conceal much. So bravo to those who do what I can't " You've broken that barrier and posted that first picture that has made you scared. That's a massive thing and well done you!! When I first was on fab, and for about 3 months after I joined the 2nd time, I had nothing uploaded but a clothed picture from lips to cleavage. The first pictures about 3 months later weren't much more revealing. And 18 months or so later, I did the first thread like this, with a naked pic. I've not got more confidence most of the time, more like a "fuck it, this is me" attitude sometimes. And if someone is going to be seeing me for sexy times, they'll see me naked so they may as well see what they're getting. If they're not, I need to learn not to give a toss what they think so it doesn't really matter if they see me naked... I hope that you can take the steps you want to, to do the things you want and don't allow your sense of self to constrain you | |||
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"[Clothing and inhibitions removed by poster at 15/05/22 12:16:35]" You go Mrs! | |||
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"I've got a swollen ankle do to it going bang last year ..and also problems with dvt resulting in me taking warfrin every day ..I proudly said I didn't rattle when I walked...but now there's a very slight rattle "There isn't much you can do with medical issues except hope in a lot of cases... sounds like you need to be careful with yourself. | |||
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"Thanks Posh for this thread. It's not always easy to not care about how you look and be conscious of that. Just in the same way it's not easy to be told to "cheer up" when you feeling down. You're working on yourself and that's all that matters. Baby steps are still steps in the right direction however small they may be
Earlier I was reading through the first one of these threads that I posted (about 150 years ago), and I came across a post where I said that we should drag each other along the journey kicking and screaming (or something like that). I think we do
Steps are all important gorgeous
I think if we had a time machine and went back to that point and saw how much we've changed we would be amazed and think it wasn't possible. Sometimes we need to reflect how far we've come not how far we've yet to go (talking generally now) "As usual... you're right. And very wise | |||
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"I read this thing, when I was having body image issues, is to try and become more familiar with seeing ourselves naked. For example, instead of thinking of being naked as a thing we do (and then inspecting and critiquing ourselves in the mirror)..to try and do more every day things naked or semi naked. So, drying our hair in a full length mirror. I usually do this fully clothed, but will occasionally do it naked or half clothed, so I'm getting glimpses of myself naked. It helped and still does help me get familiar with seeing myself naked and coming to terms with acceptance "I was told something similar... except also that having pictures of yourself when you've felt good was a good idea. There is now a wall of photos of me in my house that I also avoid looking at a lot of the time... but on occasion I'll have a gander and not want to cry. I'm glad to hear it's working for you, lovely... I think you have a gorgeous figure! Randomly, I often wander around the house in the buff... I just don't look at myself while doing it. And no one else can see me. I'm not sure that helps much | |||
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"You are my kinda twat Poshy, love you
Midnight xx "And I love you, you smushpants | |||
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"I'm in a love hate relationship wit my body, he loves it, I hate it. I can't bear to look at myself sometimes as all I see is the flaws, the stomach, the wobbles, the scars. To post a picture now is hard work as I have to take a million where I can whittle it down to just one where I don't see the bad things, I many seem like I'm confident in pictures but the reality is far from that." He's right TG. It's lovely x | |||
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"I'm in a love hate relationship wit my body, he loves it, I hate it. I can't bear to look at myself sometimes as all I see is the flaws, the stomach, the wobbles, the scars. To post a picture now is hard work as I have to take a million where I can whittle it down to just one where I don't see the bad things, I many seem like I'm confident in pictures but the reality is far from that." I hope that you'll some day see what he sees. It's a beautiful thing to have someone who loves all of you, and who glories in you, but it doesn't always help the self to see the good bits. You'll get back to the days of finding it easier to take pictures, and as you take them more you'll find it easier to love what you see again I hope. Baby steps. | |||
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"I've been thinking about this for a while and decided I'd bring this thread back, not least because of Floro's compliments thread, and a couple of the posts in that. So excuse the waffle (you know I don't do things by halves!) We all have bits we don't love about ourselves. All of us. Size 0, Size 36, XS, 5XL and everything in between. It's rare to find a lucky person who loves all of themselves equally. For me it's mainly my belly. That's been an issue for me at a size 32 and a size 10. I'm mostly ok with it when I'm wearing clothes these days but getting naked is still an issue. Add to that the rolls to my sides, the bingo wings and the excess skin from yo yo weight loss and gain, and pretty much I feel like a car crash from neck to ankle (and I hate feet, so I guess actually neck down). I have one mirror in my house that's bigger than a pocket size, and that's above the bathroom sink. I rarely look in it. But my body has got me through over 43 years of my life. It's broken. It's been pulled apart and stitched back together and it has destroyed me by not being able to grow children. But it's mine. I own it. There are people who find it revolting. But I'm doing my damn best not to listen to them any more. There are people who find it sexy. There are men who have caressed it, who have kissed it all over and made me feel beautiful because they think I am. They're the ones I try to listen to now. There's a man in my life who glories in all of me, and I know it hurts him when I do myself down. And there are women. Beautiful, wonderful women who can see what I see. They see what the parts I believe are flawed are and they know how I feel about them. And they tell me I shouldn't worry, despite them knowing that's never going to happen. They tell me I'm beautiful, my body isn't what I think it is, and that I'm not actually as massive as I believe. They see how I look at myself and give it the name body dysmorphia, where I call it fact. We all look at the "flaws" in ourselves with a far more critical eye than we ever would look at others. I could have a twin, a clone of me, looking exactly as I do and I'd tell her she was beautiful. I'm sure so many of you feel the same. We need to be kinder to ourselves as much as we do to others. So here I am. This is me. This is all of me, the good and the bad. I'm putting this picture up, as I have a slightly less revealing one before, in the hope that it'll help me to love me a bit more. I'm also doing it in the hope that others will look at my body and feel better about theirs. And yes. This is in part a "look at me" post. It isn't a "tell me I'm gorgeous" post though, it's just a "here I am". I'm hoping others may use it as a "look at me too" post and find their inner strength to show of the bits they don't love too. " Hi Posh, I guess we all feel the same now and again, some more some less. I'm not going to tell you how beautiful you are, because you probably won't believe me, but you are. Our bodies are the stories of our lives the good, the bad, our health or lack of, they are the sum of who we are and anyone who can write like you do with such honesty and forthrightness about their body is going to be the sort of person who is beautiful inside and therefore beautiful outside. To paraphrase you this isnt a 'look at me' or rather a 'I'm trying to chat you up' post. This is a genuine admiration post of simeone who is brave enough to bare their body and soul to others to encourage them to do the same. Regards xx | |||
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Face - decent
Shoulders - good | |||
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"I (Jack) really struggle with my belly. I was the fat kid at school and then got super fit around 16. Then a bout of depression in my early 20's and I put on a HUGE amount of weight and never managed to shift it. It can get me quite down at times, which kinda feela silly, but there you have it. However, I am frequently (like weirdly regularly!) told I have gorgeous eyes, so I just play to my strengths! "I had a nosey at your pics. You carry it well but I completely understand where you're coming from. I hope you don't get too down over it though | |||
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"Well done "Thanks lovely | |||
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"I had a nosey at your pics. You carry it well but I completely understand where you're coming from. I hope you don't get too down over it though "Thanks. And thanks for starting this thread. | |||
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We are all beautiful, but our thought processes need fixing, not us. | |||
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However I do have one thing to thank you for (let's call it the 'triumvirate thanks' because it also includes RedV and Saff'): recently, with some trepidation, I embraced one of the recent photo challenges from you three, and which 'exposed' my torso somewhat. My profile photos had hitherto been all non-revealing because of confidence, discretion and prudence. I am mindful that there are those amongst us that walk the corridors of low-esteem within Fab Land. I think they should be acknowledged for instilling some confidence and positivity in us all. | |||
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"I've generally kept my home life and personal circumstances extraneous to this place. Until now. And because of this thread. My loft is chock full of books, whitepapers and periodicals about Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. My partner has suffered from all this for her entire life. The experts - and those who are the evangelists in their field - have given up on her (their words!). And she's given up too. So I really get this. Completely. Totally. What more can I add that hasn't been offered to you Posh by all the gentlefolk on here?
However I do have one thing to thank you for (let's call it the 'triumvirate thanks' because it also includes RedV and Saff'): recently, with some trepidation, I embraced one of the recent photo challenges from you three, and which 'exposed' my torso somewhat. My profile photos had hitherto been all non-revealing because of confidence, discretion and prudence. I am mindful that there are those amongst us that walk the corridors of low-esteem within Fab Land. I think they should be acknowledged for instilling some confidence and positivity in us all. " | |||
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I’m not gonna talk about myself today because, well I cba for emotions rn. But all you people sharing and being honest and brave. I see you. | |||
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" Hi Posh, I guess we all feel the same now and again, some more some less. I'm not going to tell you how beautiful you are, because you probably won't believe me, but you are. Our bodies are the stories of our lives the good, the bad, our health or lack of, they are the sum of who we are and anyone who can write like you do with such honesty and forthrightness about their body is going to be the sort of person who is beautiful inside and therefore beautiful outside. To paraphrase you this isnt a 'look at me' or rather a 'I'm trying to chat you up' post. This is a genuine admiration post of simeone who is brave enough to bare their body and soul to others to encourage them to do the same. Regards xx" That's so lovely. Thank you
You're right, of course. Our bodies do tell our stories... and as such it would be glorious if we could all celebrate them.
I hope you can. | |||
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"Really in a battle with myself at the moment about my body. I put the full length body pic on here because all the other pics are before I gained weight and I didn’t want to give a false impression, but I hate it and it’s the reason I’m not meeting. I love your post and your pic though, good for you! "I'm so impressed that you put that pic up even though you hate it. I can see nothing to hate... your body looks lovely to me, and I have no doubt many others feel the same. I hope that you will come to see what we see, that's the dream. So many of us hate when we put weight on, and in part I think that is because when your body changes for what you (not just you, but anyone) consider to be the worse you can't help but look back at how it was and berate yourself for those changes. That's partly a societal thing. Society decrees that weight on = laziness, indulgence, weakness and bad. But weight on can mean so many things that have nothing to do with any of those things. If we could only embrace our changes and just say "this is me now, and I'm still glorious", life would be so much better. Yet we don't allow ourselves that love. | |||
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"I’ve put weight on recently and am really unhappy with my figure, so am trying to eat better and move more. Clothes don’t fit and I don’t feel great about myself at all. I’ve not met anyone for a while. Yeah I can pose for sexy pics but confidence is at zero " You are beautiful, darling woman. And a little more weight doesn't change that at all. But if it is making you unhappy, you're doing exactly what you need to, and that's great. Just don't be too hard on yourself. Remember it is a journey, a life, and it is to be lived along the way | |||
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"New profile pic added Awful to look at so I apologise to anyone who looks "It's not awful to look at. That picture gives me all kinds of thoughts... and not one of them is bad. But if you're not a fan... well done for opening yourself up like that | |||
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"Bits" And pieces? | |||
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"Although I can't stand my tummy and would prefer my saggy boobs to be more pert, my main body hang up is about function (or lack, thereof). I hate the fact my leg doesn't work; that my pelvis is falling to bits and that I make a noise like a car crash when I move/stand up. I wish I wasn't in pain all the time and I could just whizz off and do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, without having to consider access and suchlike. So, I hate my left leg, my SI joints and my pubis symphisis joint more than I hate my belly apron and golf-ball-in-a-bag boobs
Face - decent
Shoulders - good"You know you're one of my heroes Mrs. You have broken parts and you absolutely don't allow it, or the society and infrastructure that sometimes tries to get in your way, to stop you unless there is no choice... and then you raise your voice to be heard and try to change things for the better. Also... dude. Golf balls are clearly bigger than I remember  | |||
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"This has been really interesting to read and I hope it’s helped others, and not just me "I hope so too
I love how open and willing to share people can be. And hopefully those that have been able to share are feeling good about it, and those who haven't are feeling like they might be able to soon. | |||
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"I've generally kept my home life and personal circumstances extraneous to this place. Until now. And because of this thread. My loft is chock full of books, whitepapers and periodicals about Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. My partner has suffered from all this for her entire life. The experts - and those who are the evangelists in their field - have given up on her (their words!). And she's given up too. So I really get this. Completely. Totally. What more can I add that hasn't been offered to you Posh by all the gentlefolk on here?
However I do have one thing to thank you for (let's call it the 'triumvirate thanks' because it also includes RedV and Saff'): recently, with some trepidation, I embraced one of the recent photo challenges from you three, and which 'exposed' my torso somewhat. My profile photos had hitherto been all non-revealing because of confidence, discretion and prudence. I am mindful that there are those amongst us that walk the corridors of low-esteem within Fab Land. I think they should be acknowledged for instilling some confidence and positivity in us all. "I 100% agree Nero. | |||
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"This is something I've recently identified in myself. As I change I've grown to despise my facial hair so much, even a hint of 5 o'clock shadow and I'm down in the dumps. Silly how something so small can cause such a huge reaction. But now more so as the rest of my body is changing, I've found I'm looking down between my legs and wanting rid. I feel I have no use for it anymore, simply having that bulge there is stopping me from being truly me. But I'm at the behest of the NHS on that one, with a 4 year waiting list just to get to first appointment. So best just get on with it! But yeah, being told you're beautiful and feeling it are two completely different things. Just get used to it or I'll send James Blunt round and he'll sing it until you believe it!" That must be really tough, feeling that way and such a long wait. | |||
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" However I do have one thing to thank you for (let's call it the 'triumvirate thanks' because it also includes RedV and Saff'): recently, with some trepidation, I embraced one of the recent photo challenges from you three, and which 'exposed' my torso somewhat. My profile photos had hitherto been all non-revealing because of confidence, discretion and prudence. I am mindful that there are those amongst us that walk the corridors of low-esteem within Fab Land. I think they should be acknowledged for instilling some confidence and positivity in us all. " Aw, Nero. We did nothing, it was all you. It's funny, even though we're mates, I had no idea you had body issues. I guess, like me, it's the false confidence you portray. Keep working on it & ignore that inner voice.
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"No major issues with my body. Was far more self conscious when I was younger. Without a bra on or clever angles my tits are pretty unspectacular. Thanks to the kids for that. Sometimes my legs look more chunky than toned. The usual stretch marks and cellulite of a 47yr old woman. " I think you have a gorgeous figure. We all use angles and the like to make the most of what we've got, and one of the things I love to do is show people the difference an angle can make... and finding that sweet spot to take the picture from can make all the difference. I think when I was younger I thought that by the time I was 40 I'd be, if not happy with myself, at least resigned and more accepting. I'm glad that's true for you... maybe it'll be my turn when I'm 50 | |||
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"I’ve put weight on recently and am really unhappy with my figure, so am trying to eat better and move more. Clothes don’t fit and I don’t feel great about myself at all. I’ve not met anyone for a while. Yeah I can pose for sexy pics but confidence is at zero You are beautiful, darling woman. And a little more weight doesn't change that at all. But if it is making you unhappy, you're doing exactly what you need to, and that's great. Just don't be too hard on yourself. Remember it is a journey, a life, and it is to be lived along the way "You’re so right thank you beautiful, you look gorgeous in your pic x | |||
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"Stomach ..my tits to big but hey ho nothing works to make em smaller..in essence love thy self !" I love that picture! And your gallery is gorgeous! Totally rocking yourself lady. Self love is absolutely the goal I think... and I'm hoping your hey ho is an indication that you've reached that! | |||
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"I can't... I can't contribute today but you're amazing, Posh "I'm not amazing, lovely. I'm just a broken soul trying to encourage people to see their own beauty. They do it for me, I'm paying it forward. But thank you. And when you can, you know I'm here | |||
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"I had a nosey at your pics. You carry it well but I completely understand where you're coming from. I hope you don't get too down over it though
Thanks. And thanks for starting this thread. "I hope it has brought a smile. Preferably one at yourself in the mirror | |||
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"I’ve read this thread a few times now hoping the body positivity will run off on me xx J x" J... I'm absolutely certain it will. Maybe not today, maybe not this week. But I'm hoping sooner rather than later xx | |||
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"I’m just sad that theres only one of me, the world is a much duller place for it
The bits that I would fix I broke in the first place so
I'm sad there is only one of you too.
Not least because two of you in a room could be comedy gold! "Two of me in a room would be dangerous  | |||
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"Posh, and all the others, you’re beautiful
We are all beautiful, but our thought processes need fixing, not us. "That's exactly it... except actually there are parts of me that do need fixing. I should really get on to the docs... | |||
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"I'm generally alright with myself other than I'm too thin, always have been. I've gotten to the point where I just kinda shrug at myself in the mirror and crack on with life, but it's still at the back of my mind." I don't think you're too thin at all
Shrugging at yourself is a great achievement. It means you're looking and acknowledging your form. And that is excellent!
A few months ago I looked in the mirror and went "meh". And burst into tears... because that was the first time in years I'd looked in the mirror and not actively wanted to cry.
So I celebrate your shrug. And I hope that one day you find yourself doing the Fonz double thumbs up instead... and meaning it (ok... now I feel old) | |||
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"I’m not comfortable being naked alone let alone with someone else. I hate my stomach but I’ve learnt to accept it in tighter clothes, hate my boobs aren’t where they once were but I can’t afford surgery. That said I wear stuff that draws the eyes to the curves and makes me feel mor confident. Will I ever get completely naked infront of someone else……. Probably not " That saddens me... because it seems to say that you're so conscious of the bots you don't like that you can't just let go and live in the moment. I really hope that's not the case though, because you've always struck me (from your profile and postings in the forum) as someone who is full of life and lives it to the fullest. Being able to give yourself confidence through dressing is a great thing though. You've found a great way to be able to live full and in the moment without being nekkid... and you rock it! | |||
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"I've generally kept my home life and personal circumstances extraneous to this place. Until now. And because of this thread. My loft is chock full of books, whitepapers and periodicals about Body Dysmorphic Disorder, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. My partner has suffered from all this for her entire life. The experts - and those who are the evangelists in their field - have given up on her (their words!). And she's given up too. So I really get this. Completely. Totally. What more can I add that hasn't been offered to you Posh by all the gentlefolk on here?
However I do have one thing to thank you for (let's call it the 'triumvirate thanks' because it also includes RedV and Saff'): recently, with some trepidation, I embraced one of the recent photo challenges from you three, and which 'exposed' my torso somewhat. My profile photos had hitherto been all non-revealing because of confidence, discretion and prudence. I am mindful that there are those amongst us that walk the corridors of low-esteem within Fab Land. I think they should be acknowledged for instilling some confidence and positivity in us all. "I had to take some time after reading this Nero. Because it really hit me. Thank you so much for sharing, I feel blessed that I inspired you to do so. I believe we should all at least try to encourage confidence, positivity and joy in our fellow travellers through life, else what's the point. There is a reason they say that a smile is catching, after all | |||
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"Posh, the forums are infinitely better with you in them. You are truly wonderful. So here’s to you
I’m not gonna talk about myself today because, well I cba for emotions rn. But all you people sharing and being honest and brave. I see you. "Oh Steve. You're too kind to me. I'm just a pervy broken twonk really, but I'll take the compliment as graciously as I can. Thank you | |||
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"I’ve just come on here to say I do love these threads and they do a lot of good. Most of us struggle at times, if not always and knowing you’re not the only one who feels this way helps. Oh and NSP, I always admire your legs…and your shoes xx"Thank you sweetheart. Knowing it helps makes it worth it and makes me smile. I hope they do actually do good. As for the legs and shoes... the shoes really make the legs
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"This is something I've recently identified in myself. As I change I've grown to despise my facial hair so much, even a hint of 5 o'clock shadow and I'm down in the dumps. Silly how something so small can cause such a huge reaction. But now more so as the rest of my body is changing, I've found I'm looking down between my legs and wanting rid. I feel I have no use for it anymore, simply having that bulge there is stopping me from being truly me. But I'm at the behest of the NHS on that one, with a 4 year waiting list just to get to first appointment. So best just get on with it! But yeah, being told you're beautiful and feeling it are two completely different things. Just get used to it or I'll send James Blunt round and he'll sing it until you believe it!" Oh bless you! I hope your wait isn't too horrific. The list is a great step to have taken, and to be celebrated. It isn't the same, but I can appreciate to some degree how it is to feel you're not in the body you're meant to be in. And I absolutely do not envy you that. Thank you so much for sharing | |||
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"I’ve put weight on recently and am really unhappy with my figure, so am trying to eat better and move more. Clothes don’t fit and I don’t feel great about myself at all. I’ve not met anyone for a while. Yeah I can pose for sexy pics but confidence is at zero You are beautiful, darling woman. And a little more weight doesn't change that at all. But if it is making you unhappy, you're doing exactly what you need to, and that's great. Just don't be too hard on yourself. Remember it is a journey, a life, and it is to be lived along the way
You’re so right thank you beautiful, you look gorgeous in your pic x"Thank you beautiful | |||
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"I’m just sad that theres only one of me, the world is a much duller place for it
The bits that I would fix I broke in the first place so
I'm sad there is only one of you too.
Not least because two of you in a room could be comedy gold!
Two of me in a room would be dangerous "You spelt "interesting and fun" wrong | |||
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"I don’t like my hips they are to big" But... they hold your legs beautifully, and frame your glorious bottom so well! I hope that someday soon you find love for them, or at least can reframe how you feel about them | |||
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"Hi Posh, thanks for this thread. Truly inspiring, and you do look beautiful. I’m fat and much heavier than my profile pics allude to, why am I selling an image that isn’t reality? I know I’m fat. I love me regardless and I love getting naked, but I’m not putting up truthful pics (they’re me, but don’t show the belly and size of me) - I need to get more honest with Fab and myself. Uploading a belly squidgy pic now. Will take more soon. Solidarity! "New profile pic, belly galore!! | |||
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"My body has defeated death so I am rather proud of it. Also there’s some people that like to touch bits of my body and that makes me feel sexy and sometimes cute so it can’t really be that bad a body "You have reached that point of love and acceptance I aspire to, and that is glorious! Thank you so much for sharing it | |||
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"Hi Posh, thanks for this thread. Truly inspiring, and you do look beautiful. I’m fat and much heavier than my profile pics allude to, why am I selling an image that isn’t reality? I know I’m fat. I love me regardless and I love getting naked, but I’m not putting up truthful pics (they’re me, but don’t show the belly and size of me) - I need to get more honest with Fab and myself. Uploading a belly squidgy pic now. Will take more soon. Solidarity!
New profile pic, belly galore!! "I love that! You look so happy! And so beautiful! Your confidence and joy in yourself is so inspiring to me. Thank you so much for sharing | |||
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"The worst thing about my body right now is my back. It stops me working out on a long list of parts of my body I want to and it’s stopped me running too. I’m trying everything to help it, next thing is the first of a few sessions of acupuncture on Friday morning. Hades" I can absolutely relate to that. I hope the acupuncture helps. I got banned from running after my last back operation... that was a sad time | |||
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"Our latest pic shows some of my tummy, trying to see if it will help my body confidence. " That's a lovely picture Red! I find that sometimes it can help to post these pictures. And sometimes not so much. I hope it does help you. You're gorgeous | |||
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"Our latest pic shows some of my tummy, trying to see if it will help my body confidence. That's a lovely picture Red! I find that sometimes it can help to post these pictures. And sometimes not so much. I hope it does help you. You're gorgeous "Thank you so much that's so kind. You know your somewhat gorgeous too x | |||
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"Oh posh, I think you look wonderful. But I totally understand that in your eyes that you see something different to what others see. I’m the same, I’ve put so much weight on the past couple of years, my health hasn’t been the best so it’s not helping. I’ve got big mirrors in my bedroom that I don’t look directly at because I know what they’ll show. I’ve not been taking pics lately and staying off here as my confidence has taken a big nosedive. I’m hoping my upcoming holiday will refresh me and I can get my mojo back x " Angie my lovely... you know I think you're beautiful and I wish you saw that in yourself
Hopefully a bit of R&R will absolutely help. But even if you don't feel up to new photos... don't desert us. You're too glorious on the forum to not be around | |||
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"Oh posh, I think you look wonderful. But I totally understand that in your eyes that you see something different to what others see. I’m the same, I’ve put so much weight on the past couple of years, my health hasn’t been the best so it’s not helping. I’ve got big mirrors in my bedroom that I don’t look directly at because I know what they’ll show. I’ve not been taking pics lately and staying off here as my confidence has taken a big nosedive. I’m hoping my upcoming holiday will refresh me and I can get my mojo back x Angie my lovely... you know I think you're beautiful and I wish you saw that in yourself
Hopefully a bit of R&R will absolutely help. But even if you don't feel up to new photos... don't desert us. You're too glorious on the forum to not be around "Thanks lovely, I shall be around for a while yet x | |||
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"Our latest pic shows some of my tummy, trying to see if it will help my body confidence. That's a lovely picture Red! I find that sometimes it can help to post these pictures. And sometimes not so much. I hope it does help you. You're gorgeous
Thank you so much that's so kind.
You know your somewhat gorgeous too x"Aww thank you
I try to be. And I try to believe I am. But as we know... not so easy | |||
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"Oh posh, I think you look wonderful. But I totally understand that in your eyes that you see something different to what others see. I’m the same, I’ve put so much weight on the past couple of years, my health hasn’t been the best so it’s not helping. I’ve got big mirrors in my bedroom that I don’t look directly at because I know what they’ll show. I’ve not been taking pics lately and staying off here as my confidence has taken a big nosedive. I’m hoping my upcoming holiday will refresh me and I can get my mojo back x Angie my lovely... you know I think you're beautiful and I wish you saw that in yourself
Hopefully a bit of R&R will absolutely help. But even if you don't feel up to new photos... don't desert us. You're too glorious on the forum to not be around
Thanks lovely, I shall be around for a while yet x "I am very glad about that xx | |||
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"You ask for a little internal truth by the sounds so il give a little i reacted badly to events as the pandemic began so to help iv spent the last 2 years trying to get in some kind of shape rather than a circle Am i happy what i see in the mirror sure the body part my issues start behind my eyes they lack the life and energy i used to have im bombarded by an inner guilt for some of my actions and how i reacted to a grief overdose over the last couple years i was pathetic now i cover it well in the main with humour and childishness but im not the man i was or would like to be and i know im stubborn enough not to allow myself to ever be im not looking for nor do i deserve sympathy many had things worse than me im ashamed of who iv been but not ashamed to admit my faults now anyway thats a peak under my bonnet Nora dont you dare say it ". I won’t. But you know it | |||
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"New profile pic added Awful to look at so I apologise to anyone who looks
It's not awful to look at. That picture gives me all kinds of thoughts... and not one of them is bad.
But if you're not a fan... well done for opening yourself up like that "That's very kind of you | |||
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"You ask for a little internal truth by the sounds so il give a little i reacted badly to events as the pandemic began so to help iv spent the last 2 years trying to get in some kind of shape rather than a circle Am i happy what i see in the mirror sure the body part my issues start behind my eyes they lack the life and energy i used to have im bombarded by an inner guilt for some of my actions and how i reacted to a grief overdose over the last couple years i was pathetic now i cover it well in the main with humour and childishness but im not the man i was or would like to be and i know im stubborn enough not to allow myself to ever be im not looking for nor do i deserve sympathy many had things worse than me im ashamed of who iv been but not ashamed to admit my faults now anyway thats a peak under my bonnet Nora dont you dare say it
. I won’t. But you know it " | |||
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"You ask for a little internal truth by the sounds so il give a little i reacted badly to events as the pandemic began so to help iv spent the last 2 years trying to get in some kind of shape rather than a circle Am i happy what i see in the mirror sure the body part my issues start behind my eyes they lack the life and energy i used to have im bombarded by an inner guilt for some of my actions and how i reacted to a grief overdose over the last couple years i was pathetic now i cover it well in the main with humour and childishness but im not the man i was or would like to be and i know im stubborn enough not to allow myself to ever be im not looking for nor do i deserve sympathy many had things worse than me im ashamed of who iv been but not ashamed to admit my faults now anyway thats a peak under my bonnet Nora dont you dare say it "It’s nice to hear you you’re a good egg. Keep going x | |||
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"Hi Posh, thanks for this thread. Truly inspiring, and you do look beautiful. I’m fat and much heavier than my profile pics allude to, why am I selling an image that isn’t reality? I know I’m fat. I love me regardless and I love getting naked, but I’m not putting up truthful pics (they’re me, but don’t show the belly and size of me) - I need to get more honest with Fab and myself. Uploading a belly squidgy pic now. Will take more soon. Solidarity!
New profile pic, belly galore!! "You look amazing Estella! Such a lovely smiley face, too! Xx | |||
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"Hi Posh, thanks for this thread. Truly inspiring, and you do look beautiful. I’m fat and much heavier than my profile pics allude to, why am I selling an image that isn’t reality? I know I’m fat. I love me regardless and I love getting naked, but I’m not putting up truthful pics (they’re me, but don’t show the belly and size of me) - I need to get more honest with Fab and myself. Uploading a belly squidgy pic now. Will take more soon. Solidarity!
New profile pic, belly galore!!
You look amazing Estella! Such a lovely smiley face, too! Xx"Thanks Red, you can’t ever stop me smiling (especially when naked)! | |||
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"Hi Posh, thanks for this thread. Truly inspiring, and you do look beautiful. I’m fat and much heavier than my profile pics allude to, why am I selling an image that isn’t reality? I know I’m fat. I love me regardless and I love getting naked, but I’m not putting up truthful pics (they’re me, but don’t show the belly and size of me) - I need to get more honest with Fab and myself. Uploading a belly squidgy pic now. Will take more soon. Solidarity!
New profile pic, belly galore!!
You look amazing Estella! Such a lovely smiley face, too! Xx
Thanks Red, you can’t ever stop me smiling (especially when naked)! "And that is a wonderful way to be x | |||
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"Hi Posh, thanks for this thread. Truly inspiring, and you do look beautiful. I’m fat and much heavier than my profile pics allude to, why am I selling an image that isn’t reality? I know I’m fat. I love me regardless and I love getting naked, but I’m not putting up truthful pics (they’re me, but don’t show the belly and size of me) - I need to get more honest with Fab and myself. Uploading a belly squidgy pic now. Will take more soon. Solidarity!
New profile pic, belly galore!!
You look amazing Estella! Such a lovely smiley face, too! Xx
Thanks Red, you can’t ever stop me smiling (especially when naked)!
And that is a wonderful way to be x"Both of you lovely ladies ouse body confidence to me. You are both beautiful inside and out. X | |||
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"Hi Posh, thanks for this thread. Truly inspiring, and you do look beautiful. I’m fat and much heavier than my profile pics allude to, why am I selling an image that isn’t reality? I know I’m fat. I love me regardless and I love getting naked, but I’m not putting up truthful pics (they’re me, but don’t show the belly and size of me) - I need to get more honest with Fab and myself. Uploading a belly squidgy pic now. Will take more soon. Solidarity!
New profile pic, belly galore!!
You look amazing Estella! Such a lovely smiley face, too! Xx
Thanks Red, you can’t ever stop me smiling (especially when naked)!
And that is a wonderful way to be x
Both of you lovely ladies ouse body confidence to me. You are both beautiful inside and out. X " | |||
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"Hi Posh, thanks for this thread. Truly inspiring, and you do look beautiful. I’m fat and much heavier than my profile pics allude to, why am I selling an image that isn’t reality? I know I’m fat. I love me regardless and I love getting naked, but I’m not putting up truthful pics (they’re me, but don’t show the belly and size of me) - I need to get more honest with Fab and myself. Uploading a belly squidgy pic now. Will take more soon. Solidarity!
New profile pic, belly galore!!
You look amazing Estella! Such a lovely smiley face, too! Xx
Thanks Red, you can’t ever stop me smiling (especially when naked)!
And that is a wonderful way to be x
Both of you lovely ladies ouse body confidence to me. You are both beautiful inside and out. X "Aw, you
We need a | |||
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"You ask for a little internal truth by the sounds so il give a little i reacted badly to events as the pandemic began so to help iv spent the last 2 years trying to get in some kind of shape rather than a circle Am i happy what i see in the mirror sure the body part my issues start behind my eyes they lack the life and energy i used to have im bombarded by an inner guilt for some of my actions and how i reacted to a grief overdose over the last couple years i was pathetic now i cover it well in the main with humour and childishness but im not the man i was or would like to be and i know im stubborn enough not to allow myself to ever be im not looking for nor do i deserve sympathy many had things worse than me im ashamed of who iv been but not ashamed to admit my faults now anyway thats a peak under my bonnet Nora dont you dare say it
It’s nice to hear you you’re a good egg. Keep going x"you taking the piss out of my lack of hair thats like talking about a girls boobs at work | |||
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"You ask for a little internal truth by the sounds so il give a little i reacted badly to events as the pandemic began so to help iv spent the last 2 years trying to get in some kind of shape rather than a circle Am i happy what i see in the mirror sure the body part my issues start behind my eyes they lack the life and energy i used to have im bombarded by an inner guilt for some of my actions and how i reacted to a grief overdose over the last couple years i was pathetic now i cover it well in the main with humour and childishness but im not the man i was or would like to be and i know im stubborn enough not to allow myself to ever be im not looking for nor do i deserve sympathy many had things worse than me im ashamed of who iv been but not ashamed to admit my faults now anyway thats a peak under my bonnet Nora dont you dare say it "Thank you for sharing. Being happy with your body and shape is a start. I hope you find your internal peace one day. | |||
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"I totally get this! I hate my figure. I pick holes in myself all day. People think I’m confident but I’m far from it. I’m just a good actress. When I go to clubs with my fella I always feel he wants everyone else more than me. And we don’t even share. So poshy pants, I completely get ya! It’s not easy at all when we have this mind frame. But we are lucky we have a man and friends that love us for us. Love ya! x"That's the thing of it... putting that confident face on and acting the part. They always say "fake it til you make it..." | |||
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"I seem to have put on weight belly and face the belly im not so fussed about but how do you loose the weight on your face?" I’ve considered becoming a nun so I can tuck my chins into my wimple | |||
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"I need to chip in before we hit the dreaded 175... You started with a beautiful post, Posh. I found it very affecting. And it's led to a beautiful thread: thank you (and other posters) for sharing so openly. So much resonates - not least that we're all our own worst enemy, and that little (or loud!) inner voice of negativity, or self-doubt (or even loathing at times) is quite hard to silence, no matter what others tell us. If only we could hear what others say! Body image is a funny old thing, isn't it. I'm a pretty confident guy, comfortable enough in my own skin, but I have good days and bad days. I do have mirrors(!), but on a bad day can spend far too much time scrutinising what I don't like and chastising myself for not working harder to improve it. Other times, I'm happy enough! There was nothing I could do about the things I used to like the least when I was younger: no diet would fix being brown and short! And not helped by all the girls being obsessed with my tall, white friends - who did look annoyingly like models, it has to be said. But being perma-features, I guess it forces acceptance (not that any of us have to "accept" our beautiful colours of any shade!), and I eventually learnt that I was attractive to some people and not to others, and that was not too bad after all... I'm just rambling now, without any clear purpose, so I'll finish where I started - to say thank you for starting such a powerful thread. This is trite, but beauty comes in all shapes and sizes so I guess we all just need to remember that, and be kinder to ourselves (easier said than done, I know...!) " Thank you for sharing as well, very much. I think trite isn't always a bad thing... these things get said time and again because they're true after all. What you said about hearing others... we do need to do that. But what we need to do is to shut up the voices within that say "this person doesn't mean what they're saying... because xyz", and just accept at face value whatever that person is actually saying. On here it is too easy to think "he (she, they) is just saying that to get in my pants. And he only wants to get in my pants because he thinks I'll be an easy lay because I must be desperate" or "he is only saying that because he is copy/pasting to every female profile he can find, if I replied he would laugh at me/reject me/ignore me anyway". Maybe these people do actually mean the nice things they say. And maybe if more people were actually genuine with their compliments (and otherwise), rather than flinging them around in the hopes of "action", more people could believe them. I'm glad you're pretty comfortable in your skin now, and don't let the bad days get too much. You have nice skin | |||
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"You ask for a little internal truth by the sounds so il give a little i reacted badly to events as the pandemic began so to help iv spent the last 2 years trying to get in some kind of shape rather than a circle Am i happy what i see in the mirror sure the body part my issues start behind my eyes they lack the life and energy i used to have im bombarded by an inner guilt for some of my actions and how i reacted to a grief overdose over the last couple years i was pathetic now i cover it well in the main with humour and childishness but im not the man i was or would like to be and i know im stubborn enough not to allow myself to ever be im not looking for nor do i deserve sympathy many had things worse than me im ashamed of who iv been but not ashamed to admit my faults now anyway thats a peak under my bonnet Nora dont you dare say it
Thank you for sharing. Being happy with your body and shape is a start. I hope you find your internal peace one day."happieeeeeeerr | |||
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"If I can't love my body I can't expect anyone else to. I'm too old to be worrying about imperfections. I am what I am. " I absolutely celebrate that you've accepted and, I'm hoping, glory in your body. I don't agree that you're too old to worry about imperfections though, worries at any age are perfectly valid after all. But it is absolutely delightful that you are happy in your own skin! | |||
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"I seem to have put on weight belly and face the belly im not so fussed about but how do you loose the weight on your face? I’ve considered becoming a nun so I can tuck my chins into my wimple "I think it's the hardest place to loose weight. I mean you would literally have to starve till the face starts to suck itself in | |||
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"There's things about my body that just feel and look wrong to me whenever I see them. I just kind of cope with with it as much as I can though, as I don't think that I'll ever have the courage and desperation that would be needed to change these things. Probably too late in life anyway. It does distress me that I'll never have people look at me and see me in the way that I wish they could " I don't think it is ever too late to try and change things that you're not happy with, and if they're affecting your mental health then surely they're worth tackling. I'm all for making yourself feel better about the outer shell if you can! | |||
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" I seem to have put on weight belly and face the belly im not so fussed about but how do you loose the weight on your face? " I don't think you can target an area in that way... I usually find that when u lose weight it shows in my face first, if that helps any? | |||
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