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Polyarmory
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By *ssex_tom OP Man
over a year ago
Chelmsford |
News reports that Two couples who live together are not sure who the father of the children are. What happens if it all goes sour. Is it then polygon?
Are there couples on fab that are into poly relationships
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I would assume so. I think it's great. I don't think one person can fulfill all the wants and needs of another, especially when those needs change regularly. I was very surprised how closed minded the comments were on Facebook about it. |
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"I would assume so. I think it's great. I don't think one person can fulfill all the wants and needs of another, especially when those needs change regularly. I was very surprised how closed minded the comments were on Facebook about it."
It certainly raises lots of practical and legal implications |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Does it matter who is biologically the father? Historically I don’t think it has in poly set ups.
For some poly people, ideas about ownership and possession are unhelpful and I think that extends to children |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would assume so. I think it's great. I don't think one person can fulfill all the wants and needs of another, especially when those needs change regularly. I was very surprised how closed minded the comments were on Facebook about it.
It certainly raises lots of practical and legal implications "
I like the idea of poly. I’m sure if I was in that type of relationship, worrying about court implication wouldn’t be my first thought when finding out the one I loved was pregnant.
It’s something I’ve never thought about, parenting in poly’ relationships. Everything would be equal possibly? |
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"News reports that Two couples who live together are not sure who the father of the children are. What happens if it all goes sour. Is it then polygon?
Are there couples on fab that are into poly relationships
"
Nope Polly's not gone, I'm still here  And I'm all for relationships where people fancy a bit of Polly    |
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I firmly believe that nearly everyone has a need to know who their biological parents are. I'm all for polyamory but not think it's sensible for people to know if possible whose genes they possess |
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"Does it matter who is biologically the father? Historically I don’t think it has in poly set ups.
For some poly people, ideas about ownership and possession are unhelpful and I think that extends to children "
I think that’s a very naive mindset to have.
It sounds lovely on paper. Very sunshine and rainbows. But in reality in a society things can go bad, relationships can end, and people plus their children might need financial support. That’s where the law steps in to figure that out and help enforce it and situations like this could turn ugly without it. |
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"
Are there couples on fab that are into poly relationships
"
I think we're going to see Polyamory and Swinging intersect a lot more in the years to come.
I'm poly, the hinge in a straight MFM vee.
I'm not sure my husband and I would find a couple we'd mutually have feels for.
Really it seems most polyamory dynamics are about people as individuals having relationships with multiple people at the same time.
Swinging as couples IMO is a dynamic that built on the concept of a primary relationship and protecting that couple at all times.
Hierarchies have a place for poly couples who have intertwined lives but as a whole the dynamic and individuality of each relationship is respected in its own right than many swingers might be comfortable with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make this serious. So I’m OUT!
I feel like a dragon.
I'm sorry, we're fresh out of dragons. Try a wyvern."
BUT… wait? This isn’t the set of dragon’s den? |
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"Does it matter who is biologically the father? Historically I don’t think it has in poly set ups.
For some poly people, ideas about ownership and possession are unhelpful and I think that extends to children
I think that’s a very naive mindset to have.
It sounds lovely on paper. Very sunshine and rainbows. But in reality in a society things can go bad, relationships can end, and people plus their children might need financial support. That’s where the law steps in to figure that out and help enforce it and situations like this could turn ugly without it. "
Let's not pretend there's plenty of monogamous men unknowingly raising children that aren't there's and plenty of children who either don't know who their dad is or think it's someone it isn't. My exs mum only found out in her 40s that her dad wasn't her biological dad. This kind of thing is really common but it's suddenly a huge issue because it's polyamory. At least the men aren't being deceived in this situation. |
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"Does it matter who is biologically the father? Historically I don’t think it has in poly set ups.
For some poly people, ideas about ownership and possession are unhelpful and I think that extends to children
I think that’s a very naive mindset to have.
It sounds lovely on paper. Very sunshine and rainbows. But in reality in a society things can go bad, relationships can end, and people plus their children might need financial support. That’s where the law steps in to figure that out and help enforce it and situations like this could turn ugly without it.
Let's not pretend there's plenty of monogamous men unknowingly raising children that aren't there's and plenty of children who either don't know who their dad is or think it's someone it isn't. My exs mum only found out in her 40s that her dad wasn't her biological dad. This kind of thing is really common but it's suddenly a huge issue because it's polyamory. At least the men aren't being deceived in this situation. "
*there's not |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I firmly believe that nearly everyone has a need to know who their biological parents are. I'm all for polyamory but not think it's sensible for people to know if possible whose genes they possess "
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"Does it matter who is biologically the father? Historically I don’t think it has in poly set ups.
For some poly people, ideas about ownership and possession are unhelpful and I think that extends to children
I think that’s a very naive mindset to have.
It sounds lovely on paper. Very sunshine and rainbows. But in reality in a society things can go bad, relationships can end, and people plus their children might need financial support. That’s where the law steps in to figure that out and help enforce it and situations like this could turn ugly without it.
Let's not pretend there's plenty of monogamous men unknowingly raising children that aren't there's and plenty of children who either don't know who their dad is or think it's someone it isn't. My exs mum only found out in her 40s that her dad wasn't her biological dad. This kind of thing is really common but it's suddenly a huge issue because it's polyamory. At least the men aren't being deceived in this situation. "
I think it’s an issue in all situations, which part made you think I only thought it was an issue here?
If you could quote the part I d appreciate it because I’d hate my point to be my misunderstood |
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"I firmly believe that nearly everyone has a need to know who their biological parents are. I'm all for polyamory but not think it's sensible for people to know if possible whose genes they possess "
Sure. Fortunately we have the technology. (And as Lacey points out, this isn't an issue confined to poly families) |
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"Does it matter who is biologically the father? Historically I don’t think it has in poly set ups.
For some poly people, ideas about ownership and possession are unhelpful and I think that extends to children
I think that’s a very naive mindset to have.
It sounds lovely on paper. Very sunshine and rainbows. But in reality in a society things can go bad, relationships can end, and people plus their children might need financial support. That’s where the law steps in to figure that out and help enforce it and situations like this could turn ugly without it.
Let's not pretend there's plenty of monogamous men unknowingly raising children that aren't there's and plenty of children who either don't know who their dad is or think it's someone it isn't. My exs mum only found out in her 40s that her dad wasn't her biological dad. This kind of thing is really common but it's suddenly a huge issue because it's polyamory. At least the men aren't being deceived in this situation.
I think it’s an issue in all situations, which part made you think I only thought it was an issue here?
If you could quote the part I d appreciate it because I’d hate my point to be my misunderstood "
I meant people in general, not you specifically. |
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"I firmly believe that nearly everyone has a need to know who their biological parents are. I'm all for polyamory but not think it's sensible for people to know if possible whose genes they possess
Sure. Fortunately we have the technology. (And as Lacey points out, this isn't an issue confined to poly families)"
No it isn't confined to poliamory but this thread refers specifically to that situation.
We've recently discovered that one of us has a half cousin who has only just discovered who their biological father is/was via DNA testing. We don't know exactly what the fall out has been or if the biological father or actual father knew. |
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"I firmly believe that nearly everyone has a need to know who their biological parents are. I'm all for polyamory but not think it's sensible for people to know if possible whose genes they possess
Sure. Fortunately we have the technology. (And as Lacey points out, this isn't an issue confined to poly families)
No it isn't confined to poliamory but this thread refers specifically to that situation.
We've recently discovered that one of us has a half cousin who has only just discovered who their biological father is/was via DNA testing. We don't know exactly what the fall out has been or if the biological father or actual father knew."
Oddly, I've been accused of not being my father's daughter.
(By people who look superficially at my appearance. My medical history tends to indicate otherwise  ) |
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"I firmly believe that nearly everyone has a need to know who their biological parents are. I'm all for polyamory but not think it's sensible for people to know if possible whose genes they possess
Sure. Fortunately we have the technology. (And as Lacey points out, this isn't an issue confined to poly families)
No it isn't confined to poliamory but this thread refers specifically to that situation.
We've recently discovered that one of us has a half cousin who has only just discovered who their biological father is/was via DNA testing. We don't know exactly what the fall out has been or if the biological father or actual father knew.
Oddly, I've been accused of not being my father's daughter.
(By people who look superficially at my appearance. My medical history tends to indicate otherwise )"
I know someone who is white British married to a British asian. They have two children one takes after their mum and is tall, slim and fair, the other games after their dad and is small, stocky and dark. Can you imagine the questions complete stranger ask *in front of the children* ?  |
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"I firmly believe that nearly everyone has a need to know who their biological parents are. I'm all for polyamory but not think it's sensible for people to know if possible whose genes they possess
Sure. Fortunately we have the technology. (And as Lacey points out, this isn't an issue confined to poly families)
No it isn't confined to poliamory but this thread refers specifically to that situation.
We've recently discovered that one of us has a half cousin who has only just discovered who their biological father is/was via DNA testing. We don't know exactly what the fall out has been or if the biological father or actual father knew.
Oddly, I've been accused of not being my father's daughter.
(By people who look superficially at my appearance. My medical history tends to indicate otherwise )
I know someone who is white British married to a British asian. They have two children one takes after their mum and is tall, slim and fair, the other games after their dad and is small, stocky and dark. Can you imagine the questions complete stranger ask *in front of the children* ? "
People are bloody horrible, I swear. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We'd both love to find a 3rd for our relationship, greedy we know! Lol.
But despite being on apps for such, we're finding it impossible to find women open to this possibility and one where all 3 of us are attracted to each other.
Its mission impossible  |
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"I firmly believe that nearly everyone has a need to know who their biological parents are. I'm all for polyamory but not think it's sensible for people to know if possible whose genes they possess
Sure. Fortunately we have the technology. (And as Lacey points out, this isn't an issue confined to poly families)
No it isn't confined to poliamory but this thread refers specifically to that situation.
We've recently discovered that one of us has a half cousin who has only just discovered who their biological father is/was via DNA testing. We don't know exactly what the fall out has been or if the biological father or actual father knew.
Oddly, I've been accused of not being my father's daughter.
(By people who look superficially at my appearance. My medical history tends to indicate otherwise )
I know someone who is white British married to a British asian. They have two children one takes after their mum and is tall, slim and fair, the other games after their dad and is small, stocky and dark. Can you imagine the questions complete stranger ask *in front of the children* ?
People are bloody horrible, I swear."
What on earth makes them think they can not only ask if the children both have the same father of similar questions but while the children can hear? When they were out with just their dad they were treated with suspicion mostly I suspect because it's the girl who's the fair one. |
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"I firmly believe that nearly everyone has a need to know who their biological parents are. I'm all for polyamory but not think it's sensible for people to know if possible whose genes they possess
Sure. Fortunately we have the technology. (And as Lacey points out, this isn't an issue confined to poly families)
No it isn't confined to poliamory but this thread refers specifically to that situation.
We've recently discovered that one of us has a half cousin who has only just discovered who their biological father is/was via DNA testing. We don't know exactly what the fall out has been or if the biological father or actual father knew.
Oddly, I've been accused of not being my father's daughter.
(By people who look superficially at my appearance. My medical history tends to indicate otherwise )
I know someone who is white British married to a British asian. They have two children one takes after their mum and is tall, slim and fair, the other games after their dad and is small, stocky and dark. Can you imagine the questions complete stranger ask *in front of the children* ?
People are bloody horrible, I swear.
What on earth makes them think they can not only ask if the children both have the same father of similar questions but while the children can hear? When they were out with just their dad they were treated with suspicion mostly I suspect because it's the girl who's the fair one."
Some people need to go home and not come out again until they learn some basic manners. |
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"Depends on whether the genetic material is dominant or recessive. Some traits are simply more dominant. "
Most traits are coded by multiple genes (skin colour, for example), so it's even more complicated. And many genes demonstrate a codominant inheritance pattern, rather than completely dominant/recessive.
Anyway, back to the day job |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Depends on whether the genetic material is dominant or recessive. Some traits are simply more dominant.
Most traits are coded by multiple genes (skin colour, for example), so it's even more complicated. And many genes demonstrate a codominant inheritance pattern, rather than completely dominant/recessive.
Anyway, back to the day job "
Thanks, I just tried to keep it simple. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tom has also read that skin colour can jump several generations. This can also apply to hair colour such as ginger. "
My daughter looks Chinese. So much so she looks a lot like her cousin who is actually half Chinese. And her genes are from my great granddad. |
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
"I would assume so. I think it's great. I don't think one person can fulfill all the wants and needs of another, especially when those needs change regularly. I was very surprised how closed minded the comments were on Facebook about it."
Why suprise people will always lose down on whT they do not understand, or se reply do yet la k the outage to do it themselves |
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By *ssex_tom OP Man
over a year ago
Chelmsford |
"Depends on whether the genetic material is dominant or recessive. Some traits are simply more dominant. "
Certainly men's hair can be recessive and receding hair can be hereditary as can be a full set of hair |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"News reports that Two couples who live together are not sure who the father of the children are. What happens if it all goes sour. Is it then polygon?
Are there couples on fab that are into poly relationships
"
Always bugs me that when these stories come out that it's always 'they don't know who the father is'.
You never see any stories where it's a case of 'they don't know who the mother is'.
Bloody sexist if you ask me...... 
A |
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"Tom read that you can have two twins and they can be both of different skin tone and colour..
You can also have twins with 2 different fathers as mad as that sounds .."
I don't imagine that's a common phenomenon |
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"Tom read that you can have two twins and they can be both of different skin tone and colour..
You can also have twins with 2 different fathers as mad as that sounds .."
Also if you use a lot of tanning stuff when pregnant a Caucasian couple can give birth to a black baby. Happened to my mate |
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Interestingly in the book Sex at Dawn, the writers look at other primates and prehistoric societies and say that human groups were more sharing in taking care of all offspring regardless of who the father was, as that was the best way of ensuring survival. It was the advent of the agricultural era where property and power became so important that it changed the way people lived and saw monogamy became the norm, against our human instincts.
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By *ssex_tom OP Man
over a year ago
Chelmsford |
"Interestingly in the book Sex at Dawn, the writers look at other primates and prehistoric societies and say that human groups were more sharing in taking care of all offspring regardless of who the father was, as that was the best way of ensuring survival. It was the advent of the agricultural era where property and power became so important that it changed the way people lived and saw monogamy became the norm, against our human instincts.
"
And the church poking their nose in |
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"News reports that Two couples who live together are not sure who the father of the children are. What happens if it all goes sour. Is it then polygon?
Are there couples on fab that are into poly relationships
Always bugs me that when these stories come out that it's always 'they don't know who the father is'.
You never see any stories where it's a case of 'they don't know who the mother is'.
Bloody sexist if you ask me......
A"
*Snort* |
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"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage. "
No that's due to the MCR1 gene. |
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"Tom read that you can have two twins and they can be both of different skin tone and colour..
You can also have twins with 2 different fathers as mad as that sounds ..
I don't imagine that's a common phenomenon "
It's more common than you think. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage.
No that's due to the MCR1 gene. "
I believe it's recently been shown to be only part of the explanation for red hair. Most people who inherit MCR1 genes are not redheads. |
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"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage.
No that's due to the MCR1 gene.
I believe it's recently been shown to be only part of the explanation for red hair. Most people who inherit MCR1 genes are not redheads."
This is true, my mother is a brunette my father has black hair. But I don't think my redhair and freckles are camouflage, quite the opposite I find |
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"Tom read that you can have two twins and they can be both of different skin tone and colour..
You can also have twins with 2 different fathers as mad as that sounds ..
I don't imagine that's a common phenomenon
It's more common than you think. "
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"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage.
No that's due to the MCR1 gene.
I believe it's recently been shown to be only part of the explanation for red hair. Most people who inherit MCR1 genes are not redheads."
Everyone has the MCR1 gene. It codes for a receptor protein on the cell surface membrane of melanocytes. In people with very fair skin/red hair, the protein is mutated and it no longer triggers the synthesis of eumelanin (the form of melanin that gives darker pigment to skin, hair etc). Instead, it more pheomelanin remains (yellowy/pink colours).
So, we all have MCR1, we just all have slightly different coding to the protein and thus produce different levels of eumelanin.
My MCR1 is definitely mutated, as my skin does not tan and is milky white |
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"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage.
No that's due to the MCR1 gene.
I believe it's recently been shown to be only part of the explanation for red hair. Most people who inherit MCR1 genes are not redheads.
Everyone has the MCR1 gene. It codes for a receptor protein on the cell surface membrane of melanocytes. In people with very fair skin/red hair, the protein is mutated and it no longer triggers the synthesis of eumelanin (the form of melanin that gives darker pigment to skin, hair etc). Instead, it more pheomelanin remains (yellowy/pink colours).
So, we all have MCR1, we just all have slightly different coding to the protein and thus produce different levels of eumelanin.
My MCR1 is definitely mutated, as my skin does not tan and is milky white "
So you're a mutant?  |
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"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage.
No that's due to the MCR1 gene.
I believe it's recently been shown to be only part of the explanation for red hair. Most people who inherit MCR1 genes are not redheads.
Everyone has the MCR1 gene. It codes for a receptor protein on the cell surface membrane of melanocytes. In people with very fair skin/red hair, the protein is mutated and it no longer triggers the synthesis of eumelanin (the form of melanin that gives darker pigment to skin, hair etc). Instead, it more pheomelanin remains (yellowy/pink colours).
So, we all have MCR1, we just all have slightly different coding to the protein and thus produce different levels of eumelanin.
My MCR1 is definitely mutated, as my skin does not tan and is milky white
So you're a mutant? "
Yup. But if you can digest milk, then you're a mutant too |
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"Tom read that you can have two twins and they can be both of different skin tone and colour..
You can also have twins with 2 different fathers as mad as that sounds ..
I don't imagine that's a common phenomenon
It's more common than you think. "
And how common is that? |
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"Tom read that you can have two twins and they can be both of different skin tone and colour..
You can also have twins with 2 different fathers as mad as that sounds ..
I don't imagine that's a common phenomenon
It's more common than you think.
And how common is that?"
A mixed race couple having twins have approximately a 1 in 500 chance that the twins will have noticeably different skin colours.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage.
No that's due to the MCR1 gene.
I believe it's recently been shown to be only part of the explanation for red hair. Most people who inherit MCR1 genes are not redheads.
Everyone has the MCR1 gene. It codes for a receptor protein on the cell surface membrane of melanocytes. In people with very fair skin/red hair, the protein is mutated and it no longer triggers the synthesis of eumelanin (the form of melanin that gives darker pigment to skin, hair etc). Instead, it more pheomelanin remains (yellowy/pink colours).
So, we all have MCR1, we just all have slightly different coding to the protein and thus produce different levels of eumelanin.
My MCR1 is definitely mutated, as my skin does not tan and is milky white "
Thank you! I should have said that not all those who the MCR1 variant that is associated with red hair actually have red hair. The causation is more complex.
Have you ever read about the people of the Solomon Islands who the highest % of blonde hair outside Europe ? It's due to a local gene mutation rather than genetic influence from colonizers. |
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"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage.
No that's due to the MCR1 gene.
I believe it's recently been shown to be only part of the explanation for red hair. Most people who inherit MCR1 genes are not redheads.
Everyone has the MCR1 gene. It codes for a receptor protein on the cell surface membrane of melanocytes. In people with very fair skin/red hair, the protein is mutated and it no longer triggers the synthesis of eumelanin (the form of melanin that gives darker pigment to skin, hair etc). Instead, it more pheomelanin remains (yellowy/pink colours).
So, we all have MCR1, we just all have slightly different coding to the protein and thus produce different levels of eumelanin.
My MCR1 is definitely mutated, as my skin does not tan and is milky white
So you're a mutant? "
This is my son's favourite fact |
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"Tom read that you can have two twins and they can be both of different skin tone and colour..
You can also have twins with 2 different fathers as mad as that sounds ..
I don't imagine that's a common phenomenon
It's more common than you think.
And how common is that?
A mixed race couple having twins have approximately a 1 in 500 chance that the twins will have noticeably different skin colours.
"
Oh, I was asking in relation to twins with different fathers |
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"Tom read that you can have two twins and they can be both of different skin tone and colour..
You can also have twins with 2 different fathers as mad as that sounds ..
I don't imagine that's a common phenomenon
It's more common than you think.
And how common is that?
A mixed race couple having twins have approximately a 1 in 500 chance that the twins will have noticeably different skin colours.
Oh, I was asking in relation to twins with different fathers "
I need to go to Specsavers! I read it as a question about the twins with different skin colours |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"News reports that Two couples who live together are not sure who the father of the children are. What happens if it all goes sour. Is it then polygon?
Are there couples on fab that are into poly relationships
Always bugs me that when these stories come out that it's always 'they don't know who the father is'.
You never see any stories where it's a case of 'they don't know who the mother is'.
Bloody sexist if you ask me......
A"
But with surrogacy becoming popular this may become more of a thing in future. |
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By *ssex_tom OP Man
over a year ago
Chelmsford |
"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage.
No that's due to the MCR1 gene.
I believe it's recently been shown to be only part of the explanation for red hair. Most people who inherit MCR1 genes are not redheads.
This is true, my mother is a brunette my father has black hair. But I don't think my redhair and freckles are camouflage, quite the opposite I find "
Frida. This all goes back to ancient times when mankind and womankind needed to keep their children safe from the dinosaurs... |
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By *ssex_tom OP Man
over a year ago
Chelmsford |
"And strange that ginger people seem to often have lots of freckles. This goes right back to stone age man. It's not only the animal kingdom where animals use camouflage.
No that's due to the MCR1 gene.
I believe it's recently been shown to be only part of the explanation for red hair. Most people who inherit MCR1 genes are not redheads.
Everyone has the MCR1 gene. It codes for a receptor protein on the cell surface membrane of melanocytes. In people with very fair skin/red hair, the protein is mutated and it no longer triggers the synthesis of eumelanin (the form of melanin that gives darker pigment to skin, hair etc). Instead, it more pheomelanin remains (yellowy/pink colours).
So, we all have MCR1, we just all have slightly different coding to the protein and thus produce different levels of eumelanin.
My MCR1 is definitely mutated, as my skin does not tan and is milky white "
Anyone can copy and paste from Wikipedia...
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