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Funny lines from films
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By *B9 Queen OP Woman
over a year ago
Over the rainbow, under the bridge |
What lines from films do you love?
One of my favourites is from The Quiet Man where John Wayne arrives at a little Irish railway station and asks for directions. The porter points at a road in the distance and says, "See that road there? Don't take that one, it'll do you no good."  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What lines from films do you love?
One of my favourites is from The Quiet Man where John Wayne arrives at a little Irish railway station and asks for directions. The porter points at a road in the distance and says, "See that road there? Don't take that one, it'll do you no good." "
Victor McLagen is my great great uncle. He should have beaten Wayne it that film, especially as in real life he fought for the World Heavyweight Championship!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Take this quarter, go downtown, and have a rat gnaw that thing off your face! Good day to you, madam. -- Uncle Buck (John Candy)
Col  "
THat whole scene is brilliant, hi I'm buck melanoma moley Russell's wart, wart that's what they call me uncle wart |
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By *irtydanMan
over a year ago
Blackpool |
"Take this quarter, go downtown, and have a rat gnaw that thing off your face! Good day to you, madam. -- Uncle Buck (John Candy)
Col
THat whole scene is brilliant, hi I'm buck melanoma moley Russell's wart, wart that's what they call me uncle wart"
fantastic  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The classic
"Can you fly this plane and land it?" "Surely you can't be serious." "I am serious, and don't call me Shirley."
 "
And from this film
" there's no reason to become alarmed-and we hope you enjoy the rest of your flight, but is there anybody on board who knows how to fly a plane ?" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Annie Hall (Woody Allen): "Don't knock masturbation. It's sex with someone I love.""
Another Woody Allen line from Sleeper. On being woken from 100's of years sleep he is told his brain might have been damaged.
His reply..... "My brain? Oh no! That's my second favourite organ.."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Your only supposed to blow the bloody doors off  "
Far better one from The Italian Job which usually goes over everyones heads. In the 'dentist', Camp Freddie tells Mr Bridger (Noel Coward) that he has found the computer expert Prof Peach (Benny Hill) but is worried that he won't play ball as he may not 'be bent'.
Bridgers (Cowards!) reply.... "Camp Freddie... EVERYBODY in the World is BENT!"
PMSL every time I watch it and people still ask 'what's funny about that....?' I give up sometimes..... 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Suck my fat one, you cheap dime store hood.
The Late River Phoenix, Stand By Me. "
Class 
Originaly from Four Past Midnight by Steven King, a book of four short stories.
The Body being Stand By Me.
Also Shawshank Redemption and two more stories I can't remember. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Suck my fat one, you cheap dime store hood.
The Late River Phoenix, Stand By Me.
Class
Originaly from Four Past Midnight by Steven King, a book of four short stories.
The Body being Stand By Me.
Also Shawshank Redemption and two more stories I can't remember."
the long walk and the running man are the others |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Tropic Thunder--
[Jeff, Kirk, and Kevin have just learned Alpa is gay]
Jeff Portnoy: Alpa, if you untie me, I will literally suck your dick, right now.
Alpa Chino: Man, I told you for the last time, I love tha pussy!
Jeff Portnoy: I'll cradle the balls, stroke the shaft, work the pipe, and swallow the gravy. Get it over here, buddy. Let's do this. |
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"Suck my fat one, you cheap dime store hood.
The Late River Phoenix, Stand By Me.
Class
Originaly from Four Past Midnight by Steven King, a book of four short stories.
The Body being Stand By Me.
Also Shawshank Redemption and two more stories I can't remember.
the long walk and the running man are the others"
The Body and Shawshank, were from different season alone with Apt Pupil and The Breathing Method.
Long walk and Running man were part of the Bachman Books along with Rage and Roadwork.
Four past midnight consisted of The Langoliers, Secret window-secret garden, The Library Policeman, and The Sun Dog
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Team America "We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild are pussies. And Kim Jong Il is an asshole. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Team America "We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild are pussies. And Kim Jong Il is an asshole. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get fucked by dicks. But dicks also fuck assholes: assholes that just want to shit on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with assholes their way. But the only thing that can fuck an asshole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they fuck too much or fuck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of shit that they become assholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from ass holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us fuck this asshole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in shit!""
Have you even seen a man eat his own head?
Now.suck my dick! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Gary Johnston: [Gary sees the limo] Oh, I get it. I'm supposed to get inside your limo and let you put your finger inside me. And if I go down on you, I get a movie part.
Spottswoode: Uh, no. I just want to show you something.
Gary Johnston: Yeah I bet you do.
Spottswoode: Please, Gary. I'm not from Hollywood, I'm not going to fuck your mouth, and my time is EXTREMELY valuable!
[Gary gets in the limo] |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Super troopers
Captain O'Hagan: I swear to God I'm going to pistol whip the next guy who says, " Shenanigans."
Mac: Hey Farva what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy shit on the walls and the mozzarella sticks?
Farva: You mean Shenanigans?
Mac: OOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
Thorny: OOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
[as they hand the Captain their pistols] |
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My favourite is Sid James saying 'this is the wife, don't laugh' and then saying:
"smoke"?
"no thanks, I tried it once and didn't like it"
Then Sid says:
"oh...a drink?"
"no thanks, I tried it once and didn't like it...nor does my daughter"
To which Sid says:
"your only one, I assume" and then does his dirty laugh.
Classic Carry On! |
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By *B9 Queen OP Woman
over a year ago
Over the rainbow, under the bridge |
From Smokey and the Bandit just last night:
"No way you could have come from my loins. When I get home I'm gonna punch your momma in the mouth."
(The sheriff to his dopey son). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In Blood Diamond Leo says 'Well, off the record, I like to get kissed before I get fucked'...
This amused me greatly!
Accidently said it to the boss the other day, good job she has a sense of humor |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Fat, d*unk, and stupidis no wayto go through life,son.". Animal house.
"I fart in your general direction. Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries." Monty Python and the Holy Grail
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When Harry met Sally:
Billy Crystal" I had sex with a woman the other night, the sex was that good, I took her to a place I didn't know possible, I made her meouw"
Bruno Kirby" You made a woman meouw?"
BC" it was incredible"
BK" you made a woman meouw?" |
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