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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Lately there has been more discriminatory posts against other people in various ways. I understand all humans are different, but it would be so nice if people just accept people for who they are and instead shaming/degrading them to just focus on yourself. It's quite easy to just block, ignore or not comment.
This site is not giving me faith at the moment.   |
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Difficult to comment without examples. Varying opinions can often be taken personally. Just because people don’t always agree doesn’t mean it’s personal. I don’t think it’s much different to how it’s always been on here to be honest. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Difficult to comment without examples. Varying opinions can often be taken personally. Just because people don’t always agree doesn’t mean it’s personal. I don’t think it’s much different to how it’s always been on here to be honest. "
There a difference between disagreeing and difference of opinion and shaming /putting people down |
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"Difficult to comment without examples. Varying opinions can often be taken personally. Just because people don’t always agree doesn’t mean it’s personal. I don’t think it’s much different to how it’s always been on here to be honest.
There a difference between disagreeing and difference of opinion and shaming /putting people down "
Of course there is, like I said it’s difficult to comment without examples. Even when people call out shaming there’s times when I don’t think it is shaming. |
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I’ve noticed it too. Currently 2 threads I’ve seen that turn into just abuse/body shaming.
I always find it interesting where people let it slide. Certain things are unmentionable without a brigade attacking you, others are welcomed, cheered and applauded. |
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"Agree, ive just come back from a month break away from the forums its really changed in the past year, and is worlds away from what it was 3-4 year ago "
I’ve noticed it goes like this now and again, I take breaks from here quite often but it’s similar in posts that it was 13 years ago. |
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"Difficult to comment without examples. Varying opinions can often be taken personally. Just because people don’t always agree doesn’t mean it’s personal. I don’t think it’s much different to how it’s always been on here to be honest.
There a difference between disagreeing and difference of opinion and shaming /putting people down "
Is it possible that the people know each other well and are engaging in some friendly ribbing? Always Dodgy online when others who are not privy to relationships and common interactions with others.
I think for the most part the forums are inclusive. We had a very positive thread yesterday (at least the last time I looked) from a TV/TS profile asking how ladies would react of they walked in and saw them in the changing room. There are occasions where someone comes in and tries to be offensive and they get shut down.
I do sometimes find the 'funnies' on here try to derail a thread which annoys me but I try to just ignore them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Difficult to comment without examples. Varying opinions can often be taken personally. Just because people don’t always agree doesn’t mean it’s personal. I don’t think it’s much different to how it’s always been on here to be honest. "
This is true. For years there’s been ‘subtext’ to most posts. You know some are directed at someone/something (without saying exactly who) With this, I do think some posts are personal.
But, I say it always, talk to people you like, and don’t if someone rubs you up the wrong way.
*id like to rub someone up
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think with every aspect of life, it depends on the place your in to receive what people are saying. Opinions aren't personal attacks but they can be taken that way if the comment triggers something within you. Also sometimes words written down can come across in a different way than it's meant. Humour can be read wrong on here especially which again isn't a personal attack it's light relief.
There will always be people looking to start conflict or put people down but on the whole I don't think there's many malicious people in the forums at all. |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Agree, ive just come back from a month break away from the forums its really changed in the past year, and is worlds away from what it was 3-4 year ago
I’ve noticed it goes like this now and again, I take breaks from here quite often but it’s similar in posts that it was 13 years ago. "
Exactly this. The forums are very cyclical.
Also nostalgia and hindsight are imperfect tools |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Interesting to see people's opinions on this. Agree it is rare, however it is about, everyone will have a different way of thinking to yourself, which is fine but when direct discrimination is made that is not acceptable. |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"Interesting to see people's opinions on this. Agree it is rare, however it is about, everyone will have a different way of thinking to yourself, which is fine but when direct discrimination is made that is not acceptable. "
Do you mean people direct discriminatory comments towards someone commenting on a thread? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Agree, ive just come back from a month break away from the forums its really changed in the past year, and is worlds away from what it was 3-4 year ago
I’ve noticed it goes like this now and again, I take breaks from here quite often but it’s similar in posts that it was 13 years ago.
Exactly this. The forums are very cyclical.
Also nostalgia and hindsight are imperfect tools"
I like nostalgia, it’s like hanging works of art on a wall I get to enjoy, and inspires me for my next painting choices, either something to compliment what it sits next to or something that is completely different for the next room.
Imperfect tools? I can make them work. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think there are times many of us say something in jest not fully considering how it could be perceived or received. Personally if I’ve seen someone make a comment that I felt was an overstep I’d message privately and call it out in a respectful way rather than get involved in a public argument with a relative stranger on a thread - as others have said, we don’t all know the relationship between others. Equally there are threads on here that I just totally avoid because of who the OP is. I find taking that approach more useful than a thread being totally vague and generalistic. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think with every aspect of life, it depends on the place your in to receive what people are saying. Opinions aren't personal attacks but they can be taken that way if the comment triggers something within you. Also sometimes words written down can come across in a different way than it's meant. Humour can be read wrong on here especially which again isn't a personal attack it's light relief.
There will always be people looking to start conflict or put people down but on the whole I don't think there's many malicious people in the forums at all."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Covid has changed many people its broken there patience and made there voice filter looser
Animals dont do well in isolation why would people a more sociable animal be any better
I saw it coming a mile away
It will get better |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lately there has been more discriminatory posts against other people in various ways. I understand all humans are different, but it would be so nice if people just accept people for who they are and instead shaming/degrading them to just focus on yourself. It's quite easy to just block, ignore or not comment.
This site is not giving me faith at the moment. "
HERE HERE! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lately there has been more discriminatory posts against other people in various ways. I understand all humans are different, but it would be so nice if people just accept people for who they are and instead shaming/degrading them to just focus on yourself. It's quite easy to just block, ignore or not comment.
This site is not giving me faith at the moment. "
Well said that man |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"Fab reflects life. I think of the fora as the photocopier or the coffee shop,a place people congregate, some talk about serious stuff, some about light-hearted stuff and some about other people. "
I'm the employee who turns up to work bleary-eyed, has no idea what I'm supposed to be doing and butts in on conversations I have no idea what they are talking about |
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"Fab reflects life. I think of the fora as the photocopier or the coffee shop,a place people congregate, some talk about serious stuff, some about light-hearted stuff and some about other people.
I'm the employee who turns up to work bleary-eyed, has no idea what I'm supposed to be doing and butts in on conversations I have no idea what they are talking about "
 .
I'm the one at my desk with a cup of coffee and a snack reading something daft on my laptop  |
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Difficult times for a lot of people at the moment, I think it carries over from real life into here.
Things that wouldn't normally bother people set them off.
Others seem to just enjoy lighting the blue touch paper and seeing the fall out. |
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"Lately there has been more discriminatory posts against other people in various ways. I understand all humans are different, but it would be so nice if people just accept people for who they are and instead shaming/degrading them to just focus on yourself. It's quite easy to just block, ignore or not comment.
This site is not giving me faith at the moment. "
I hadn't really noticed it being particularly bad at the moment, OP, but I don't read all the threads and I absolutely agree some can get a little weird, but I'd not witnessed any outright discrimination (and very sad if you have). Could not agree more though that we all just need to accept people in whatever variety they come in! |
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By *aiseiMan
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"That’s always been the problem with the written word, it completely depends on you mindset in that particular moment on how you “take” a post."
This….^^^…..in many cases. Plus there’s just more people here now; the bigger the group, the greater the chance of friction (of the bad sort) |
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There is a current thread where the op expressed a general preference.
He was immediately attacked and comments made about his profile, his pics, the size of his dick etc etc and those doing it were applauded.
Those who called it out were told that the op deserved it because he started it despite none of his comments being aimed at anytime in particular.
The comments aimed at him were much worse but they were deemed acceptable.
I didn't realise Arsene Wenger had so many profiles on here that don't see things when it suits them. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
I haven't seen much difference on the forums in the forum's in the years I've been on here. It's pretty much the same as when I started posting on here. There will always be those who attack others if they disagree with what they do or say especially when they get back up on here.
There will always be the ones who post a lot and are seen as popular so have a lot of others who publically will agree with their opinions and tell them they are marvelous even if they don't actually agree.
And there will be those who don't get much interaction and take it personally even if it's not meant to be.
A lot of threads get repeated but then they usually get replied to no matter how many times they are repeated.
You have some then who take threads from one forum to post in others because they can't think of anything new to post themselves.
There's the entitled posters who think fab should be done their way and their way only. The kink shamers,the ones who reek of misogyny or misandry.
And the ones who just pop in and out and post when they feel like it.
There's the one's who believe they're 'fab elite' and use the forum's to chat to those they deem worthy and be associated with them in public or to boast and let others know they are well just simply the best on here and others are not as kinky or sexy etc.
And there's the people that have gotten to know one another and tend to have a bit of craic on here with each other at times.
None of that is new,that's ways been the way from what I've seen anyhow .It's just the swings and roundabouts of the forums really. |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"That’s always been the problem with the written word, it completely depends on you mindset in that particular moment on how you “take” a post.
This with bells on..:."
For some people that's a get out of jail free card. |
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"That’s always been the problem with the written word, it completely depends on you mindset in that particular moment on how you “take” a post.
This with bells on..:.
For some people that's a get out of jail free card."
Agreed.
Difficulties arise with little or no punctuation, no concept of intonation, misinterpretation, mood, mindset and the list goes on.
There is no excuse for wilful abuse or intolerance of course..
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