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Please cheer me up

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By *yron69 OP Man over a year ago

Fareham

I’ve fucked up and am getting depressed.

Any jokes would be welcome to brighten my day..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What is the opposite of a croissant? A happy uncle.

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By *r SproutMan over a year ago

the middle

I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode. I said, "Are you two an item?"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Went to a diner with a couple I know.

They started arguing.

Normally, I'm not one to take sides, but they were so distracted by shouting at each other that I stole her fries and his coleslaw..

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By *heArrowsCouple over a year ago

"Went to a diner with a couple I know.

They started arguing.

Normally, I'm not one to take sides, but they were so distracted by shouting at each other that I stole her fries and his coleslaw.."

Funny, but also the correct combination

Unless she had tobacco onions and he had Pepper sauce ... in that case you need to take them immediately

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By *ildmanYorksMan over a year ago

Doncaster & Bembridge

Two fish in a tank. One says "how do you drive this thing?"

Two parrots on a perch. One says "can you smell fish?"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’ve fucked up and am getting depressed.

Any jokes would be welcome to brighten my day.."

What have you fucked up?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My deaf wife just told me that “we need to talk”.

That’s not a good sign.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Two guys in a health club, one is putting on lace knickers.

Since when do you wear womens pants?

"Since my wife found them in the glove compartment!"

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"Two guys in a health club, one is putting on lace knickers.

Since when do you wear womens pants?

"Since my wife found them in the glove compartment!""

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It doesn’t matter how many ways you describe non-sparkling drinks. They’re still drinks.

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By *yron69 OP Man over a year ago

Fareham

"It doesn’t matter how many ways you describe non-sparkling drinks. They’re still drinks. "

I don’t get it?

But thanks all

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Went to a diner with a couple I know.

They started arguing.

Normally, I'm not one to take sides, but they were so distracted by shouting at each other that I stole her fries and his coleslaw.."

Tut tut ..shame on you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A child caveman had a conversation with an adult caveman about their age.

I kid you not.

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By *scanioMan over a year ago

Runcorn

Do you like astrology? Well I am a cross between Leo and a Capricorn, I am a Leprechaun.

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By *yron69 OP Man over a year ago

Fareham

"A child caveman had a conversation with an adult caveman about their age.

I kid you not."

Took me a while

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

"It doesn’t matter how many ways you describe non-sparkling drinks. They’re still drinks.

I don’t get it?

But thanks all

"
still drinks?

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By *uke olovingmanMan over a year ago

Gravesend

They tried to make me go to dyslexic rehab.. I said on on on

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