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Totally useless superpowers

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

What would it be?

Everytime you fall asleep you gain super strength (but just when you’re asleep)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ooooo good question

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By *heArrowsCouple  over a year ago

The ability to teleport to other planets.

Nice idea but useless.

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By *r SproutMan  over a year ago

the middle


"What would it be?

Everytime you fall asleep you gain super strength (but just when you’re asleep)"

Got to be x-ray vision. Totally useless while sleeping

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By *oodmessMan  over a year ago

yumsville

x-ray teeth

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By *hrista BellendWoman  over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Turning to sand whilst battling a volcano

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

You’re immortal when you’re having a poo

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Turning to sand whilst battling a volcano"

That would turn you in to glass

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Cooling down when in hot water? Baths and showers wold be a bit shit

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By *oodmessMan  over a year ago

yumsville

Slowing down peoples blinks

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You’re immortal when you’re having a poo "
no but nobody wants to die on the toilet. And plenty do

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By *heArrowsCouple  over a year ago


"You’re immortal when you’re having a poo "

I have this power. Not once have I died while pooping

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Getting a hot head when you’re angry.

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By *hrista BellendWoman  over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights


"Turning to sand whilst battling a volcano

That would turn you in to glass "

Exactly

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By *obletonMan  over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures

The ability to fly.....north

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Turning to sand whilst battling a volcano

That would turn you in to glass

Exactly "

I bet you weren’t expecting someone to get it that fast

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By *obletonMan  over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures


"You’re immortal when you’re having a poo "

Elvis would still be with us

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By *inda May SimmonsTV/TS  over a year ago

hexham


"What would it be?

Everytime you fall asleep you gain super strength (but just when you’re asleep)"

Oooh I like this one, but I am going to have to think of a really useless superpower. Or rather a superpower which is rendered useless by the situation!

Hmmmm

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By *oodmessMan  over a year ago

yumsville

Quenching human thirst for cress.

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By *hrista BellendWoman  over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights


"Turning to sand whilst battling a volcano

That would turn you in to glass

Exactly

I bet you weren’t expecting someone to get it that fast "

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By *bi HaiveMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset

Lava spunk.

A

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By *omer47Man  over a year ago

leigh

The ability to walk through walls. Can you imagine how awesome your dreams would be if you could just walk into someone's house or building without anyone knowing.

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By *yronMan  over a year ago

grangemouth

The ability to stub your toe, when you get up in the night.

I think I may already have this one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"The ability to walk through walls. Can you imagine how awesome your dreams would be if you could just walk into someone's house or building without anyone knowing. "

They are meant to be useless powers. Like the ability to walk through walls 37.5% of the time

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Turning to sand whilst battling a volcano

That would turn you in to glass

Exactly

I bet you weren’t expecting someone to get it that fast

"

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By *etcplCouple  over a year ago

Gapping Fanny

The ability to tolerate talking to people who don’t like star wars

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"The ability to tolerate talking to people who don’t like star wars"

Can you imagine what that would be like

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Invisibility, but only from the waist down.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Being super slow

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By *obletonMan  over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures


"The ability to tolerate talking to people who don’t like star wars

Can you imagine what that would be like "

nope - definitely a bit far fetched if you ask me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Super wet dreams ... because the moment you wake up you have no fucking idea why you got an erection!!

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By *yronMan  over a year ago

grangemouth


"Invisibility, but only from the waist down."

Even worse, only your skin is invisible: all the inside bits can be seen.

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By *weet and SpiceCouple  over a year ago

Around the Midlands

The ability to hear womens' thoughts...just think of poor old Mel Gibson in 'What Women Want'

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS  over a year ago

Stockport


"Invisibility, but only from the waist down.

Even worse, only your skin is invisible: all the inside bits can be seen. "

For totally useless power, how about having visible skin but invisible insides? All your enemies can see you, but if you get injured the surgeon can't see what organs have been damaged...

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By *Booboo-Man  over a year ago

Edinburgh

The ability to fly in a left hand spiral only.

Invisibility, but only when closing your eyes.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The ability to walk through walls. Can you imagine how awesome your dreams would be if you could just walk into someone's house or building without anyone knowing.

They are meant to be useless powers. Like the ability to walk through walls 37.5% of the time "

The ability to walk through half a wall

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Spider man. Shoot Webbs and fight crime during the day and shoot blanks at night..

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By *asycouple1971Couple  over a year ago

midlands

Eating.

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By *alandNitaCouple  over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"The ability to walk through walls. Can you imagine how awesome your dreams would be if you could just walk into someone's house or building without anyone knowing.

They are meant to be useless powers. Like the ability to walk through walls 37.5% of the time "

Or being able to walk 50% of the way through walls

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The ability to write the perfect profile.....would be completely useless on fab

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By *obletonMan  over a year ago

A Home Among The Woodland Creatures


"The ability to write the perfect profile.....would be completely useless on fab "

and the winner of todays internet is.....

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By *ex HolesMan  over a year ago

Up North

Can you all please stop shattering my dreams

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple  over a year ago

Lincoln

The ability to teleport to anywhere but not relative to the Earth. Best make sure you know where the ground is going to be in two seconds' time

LvM

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By *rDiscretionXXXMan  over a year ago

Gilfach

Have we all seem the film Mystery Men?

It features:

Mr Angry - he's really good at getting angry.

The Shoveller - an expert with a shovel.

The Blue Raja - deadly accurate when throwing any sort of cutlery (except knives).

Invisible Boy - he can turn himself invisible (but only when no one is watching)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

To have claws like wolverine but only when I want to fist someone.

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple  over a year ago

Lincoln

[Removed by poster at 15/04/22 15:35:39]

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By *heVonMatterhornsCouple  over a year ago

Lincoln

Super strength with regular strength bones

LvM

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"To have claws like wolverine but only when I want to fist someone."

That’s the kind of useless superpower I’m talking about

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Super strength with regular strength bones

LvM"

And that

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By *yronMan  over a year ago

grangemouth


"Invisibility, but only from the waist down.

Even worse, only your skin is invisible: all the inside bits can be seen.

For totally useless power, how about having visible skin but invisible insides? All your enemies can see you, but if you get injured the surgeon can't see what organs have been damaged..."

Have it alternate between the two.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The ability to turn water to wine but only at AA meetings.

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan  over a year ago

Bradford

The ability to walk on water

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By *oey16Man  over a year ago

West Sussex

Grow a 2ft erection

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think that is a useful superpower I don’t want to be found dead half way through a poo even dead that would be embarrassing

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The ability to be as strong as an ant....ignoring the strength to weight thing....just the actual strength that an ant can lift

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"The ability to walk through walls. Can you imagine how awesome your dreams would be if you could just walk into someone's house or building without anyone knowing.

They are meant to be useless powers. Like the ability to walk through walls 37.5% of the time "

Ouch ouch ouch YES !!! I made it

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