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Actual Date!
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I've just been on an actual, vanilla date!!! 
Though I did have to dress appropriately - I made sure I wore tights (shudder) and those hold everything in Bridget Jones knickers. That way I wouldn't forget myself and shag him... 
Had a lovely time and I think I might have to do it again!
But it does feel odd to do the chatting over dinner bit instead of just going straight to the sex bit! 
Do any of the other singles on the site date? Does it compliment your swinging or just seem strange? |
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"bloody hell i havnt been on a date for about 29 years lol
well done you for behaving  "
The tights and knicks acted like a chastity belt - even going for a pee was a palaver!
And I barely made it into the hall when I got home before I was dragging them off!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Glad you enjoyed yourself!
I don't date anymore - ever!
Yes I'll gladly flirt with all and sundry, from hotel receptionists to checkout girls at asda - and will banter on for ever during socials via fab.
But a proper, serious date? Not going down that road again - it's got me I to way too much trouble before! No more new patios for me! |
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"Sounds lovely .. go you. "
A friend of mine gave me a talking to and suggested that men like to behave like big strong providers on dates and that reaching for the check would put them off. So I didn't take any money with me to make sure that I didn't seem too independent (he asked me out for dinner and has a very good job so I wasn't being too presumptuous).
The only problem with that was when I decided to stop at the late night supermarket for a couple of things... I made it as far as the till before I remembered! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Uh it's been a lot of years since I last went on a date. 9? Something like that. Maybe longer as I'm not sure I had any actual dates with my last bf. I shagged him the first time we met.
I'd rather poke myself in the eye with a spork, I think, than go on a vanilla date. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Glad you had a lovely time... I date every now and then, but I couldn't do the tights and Bridget Jones knickers.
For me these days a nice dinner and good conversation tends to be with swinging friends, so yes one compliments the other  |
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Well I thought it was time I had a dabble. Though I'm not a settle down, 2.3 kids, volvo and barrett box kind of woman. 
Lovely dinner, chatted for ages. Could still have been there chatting if the staff hadn't started pointedly tidying up round us.
And since we were both driving we couldn't really justify a nightcap anywhere (had lovely bellinis) and I was on my best non-swinging behaviour (so as not to scare him off - apparently some nilla men don't like it when it's too easy!) so I didn't suggest a hotel...  |
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My last date before i met jay was lovley, turned up with a bouquet of flowers, was perfect gent and took me to jonathans in birmingham(I believe its closed) but it was a lovely restaurant.
Then on the way home i had a kiss goodnight. It was 5 years later that i shagged him |
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"My last date before i met jay was lovley, turned up with a bouquet of flowers, was perfect gent and took me to jonathans in birmingham(I believe its closed) but it was a lovely restaurant.
Then on the way home i had a kiss goodnight. It was 5 years later that i shagged him"
He walked me to my car, got a bit shy, then had a burst of confidence and kissed me.
Then he asked me what I wanted to do next time, then stopped me from answering and said to let him come up with an idea!
I think he likes me |
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"My last date before i met jay was lovley, turned up with a bouquet of flowers, was perfect gent and took me to jonathans in birmingham(I believe its closed) but it was a lovely restaurant.
Then on the way home i had a kiss goodnight. It was 5 years later that i shagged him
He walked me to my car, got a bit shy, then had a burst of confidence and kissed me.
Then he asked me what I wanted to do next time, then stopped me from answering and said to let him come up with an idea!
I think he likes me "
Well i hope it works out well |
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"My last date before i met jay was lovley, turned up with a bouquet of flowers, was perfect gent and took me to jonathans in birmingham(I believe its closed) but it was a lovely restaurant.
Then on the way home i had a kiss goodnight. It was 5 years later that i shagged him
He walked me to my car, got a bit shy, then had a burst of confidence and kissed me.
Then he asked me what I wanted to do next time, then stopped me from answering and said to let him come up with an idea!
I think he likes me
Well i hope it works out well"
Don't think I could ever give up this though. And he is very vanilla.  |
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"
Don't think I could ever give up this though. And he is very vanilla. "
Only on the outside.
In his head he was thinking about bending you over the table and taking you from behind whilst you're also sucking off the waiter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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me and my OH have been together for 22 years and we make sure we still go on dates (with each other!)
its nice and reminds you of why you liked each other in the first place xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nothing wrong with a 'nilla date....
Getting to know someone new and interesting over a couple of cappuccinos in Starbucks... 
My problem is getting them to turn up.....  |
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"sounds fun.. try it for a while heaven help him if he puts a hand on ur knee. you will be tempted to leap on him.
"
We got talking about holidays and fave hotels. He kept saying "I'd love to take you to this hotel and that one..."
So yes, he's thinking naughties. But I think he thinks I'm a Lady!  |
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"Nothing wrong with a 'nilla date....
Getting to know someone new and interesting over a couple of cappuccinos in Starbucks...
My problem is getting them to turn up..... "
Three courses with cocktails and bellinis!
Costa coffee meets are for am I going to fuck you before the end of the week! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nothing wrong with a 'nilla date....
Getting to know someone new and interesting over a couple of cappuccinos in Starbucks...
My problem is getting them to turn up.....
Three courses with cocktails and bellinis!
Costa coffee meets are for am I going to fuck you before the end of the week! "
Cream and sugar...? |
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"Nothing strange about still enjoying vanilla dates!! I went on a date last week,enjoyed it too,your young free+single so why not "
I didn't mean to suggest there was anything wrong about them. But it did feel odd to keep all my clothes on!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do enjoy going on a date but I find the best part of a date is the kiss goodnight after you've had a great night and there's that bit of sexual tension between you's
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"I do enjoy going on a date but I find the best part of a date is the kiss goodnight after you've had a great night and there's that bit of sexual tension between you's
"
Not sure how much sexual tension there is but he's great fun and we laughed lots.
But I don't quite trust my sexual tension sensing in vanilla situations... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"so are you going on another one with him? if so how long you gonna make him wait? xx
Yes there;ll be another, not sure when. As to how long, isn't there a rule?"
is there? i never got the hang of not shagging straight away even before i started swinging! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I do enjoy going on a date but I find the best part of a date is the kiss goodnight after you've had a great night and there's that bit of sexual tension between you's
Not sure how much sexual tension there is but he's great fun and we laughed lots.
But I don't quite trust my sexual tension sensing in vanilla situations..."
It's more about enjoying your evening together and at the end you'll just feel if its right to take it to sexual.
I find that it's a different feeling to a meet which is mainly about the sexual. |
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My last vanilla date was about a month ago. I find them painful really.
The men I meet are charming, urbane, erudite...everything I would want and appear very "vanilla".
However, I don't think I could be with someone into "straight" sex only so at what point do you mention the fishnets...you want him to wear to test the waters?!! |
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By *picer07Woman
over a year ago
CARDIFF |
"
Don't think I could ever give up this though. And he is very vanilla.
Only on the outside.
In his head he was thinking about bending you over the table and taking you from behind whilst you're also sucking off the waiter."
 |
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"My last vanilla date was about a month ago. I find them painful really.
The men I meet are charming, urbane, erudite...everything I would want and appear very "vanilla".
However, I don't think I could be with someone into "straight" sex only so at what point do you mention the fishnets...you want him to wear to test the waters?!! "
The only reason i would go on a vanilla date would be if i was looking for a relationship, so i would of told him beforehand, so he would then have the opportunity to cancel or not. Otherwise its not fair on the other person |
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This was a test the waters, do I want to be dating not just meeting spur of the moment date. All planned 4 hours before it happened.
And I enjoyed his company so much that I want to do it again. But how far I'll want to go (as in just a fling or get serious) is a whole other issue which I'll look at IF we're still getting on further down the line.
But I did leave him with the impression that I date. So he won't be expecting monogamy/commitment from me.
But I doubt he'd be expecting my other dates to be swinging meets! |
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"My last vanilla date was about a month ago. I find them painful really.
The men I meet are charming, urbane, erudite...everything I would want and appear very "vanilla".
However, I don't think I could be with someone into "straight" sex only so at what point do you mention the fishnets...you want him to wear to test the waters?!!
The only reason i would go on a vanilla date would be if i was looking for a relationship, so i would of told him beforehand, so he would then have the opportunity to cancel or not. Otherwise its not fair on the other person"
That's the thing Diamond...I'm at that point where I think I'm ready for a relationship and testing the water.
When you meet someone it's "baby steps" for me. I would be overwhelmed and put off frankly if within a minute of meeting I had the persons life history and sexual habits so I certainly wouldn't do it.
But as I said, it's difficult finding "that point". |
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I go on more Vanilla Dates than Swing type meets.
I don't find it difficult and im not looking for a relationship.
I don't find it difficult as I make it clear if anyone starts 'appearing' a little close or too regular that i'm not looking for a relationship.
Swingy type meets I see as purely for sex so there's no confusion.
Hope you had a great time and that you have a great time again x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"sounds fun.. try it for a while heaven help him if he puts a hand on ur knee. you will be tempted to leap on him.
We got talking about holidays and fave hotels. He kept saying "I'd love to take you to this hotel and that one..."
So yes, he's thinking naughties. But I think he thinks I'm a Lady! "
You'd better give me his number, so I can give him a warning
It's the quiet ones you have to watch out for, they end up being the axe murderers or bunny boilers |
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"My last vanilla date was about a month ago. I find them painful really.
The men I meet are charming, urbane, erudite...everything I would want and appear very "vanilla".
However, I don't think I could be with someone into "straight" sex only so at what point do you mention the fishnets...you want him to wear to test the waters?!!
The only reason i would go on a vanilla date would be if i was looking for a relationship, so i would of told him beforehand, so he would then have the opportunity to cancel or not. Otherwise its not fair on the other person
That's the thing Diamond...I'm at that point where I think I'm ready for a relationship and testing the water.
When you meet someone it's "baby steps" for me. I would be overwhelmed and put off frankly if within a minute of meeting I had the persons life history and sexual habits so I certainly wouldn't do it.
But as I said, it's difficult finding "that point"."
So if you went on a date with someone wanting it hopefully continue, would you sexually want to play with them as you do with meets? Or would you be happy with a more conventional sex life?.
Maybe if you go on a date and both want to meet again, tell them, before any feelings get involved on either side.
You could go on lots of dates but unless you where interested in taking it further you neednt tell them. But they are going to find out one way or another and for me it would be before emotions get involved.
They surprise you and be totall the same things as you |
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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago
Over the rainbow, under the bridge |
"I've just been on an actual, vanilla date!!!
Though I did have to dress appropriately - I made sure I wore tights (shudder) and those hold everything in Bridget Jones knickers. That way I wouldn't forget myself and shag him...
Had a lovely time and I think I might have to do it again!
But it does feel odd to do the chatting over dinner bit instead of just going straight to the sex bit!
Do any of the other singles on the site date? Does it compliment your swinging or just seem strange?"
Not in to dating at the moment. Have too much of a cock fixation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't think I could ever get in a vanilla relationship, like this lifestyle too much, think if I was to go down the whole relationship avenue if would have to be with another swinger, but each and everyone of us are different and unique in our own ways.
Glad you enjoyed your chat.
Agree with a previous poster, no need to tell him about swinging unless think the relationship is heading somewhere |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's been years and years since I've been on a date, I quite like it actually, dinner, drinks and nice conversation, but then I am an old romantic.
I'm loving my life right now tho, seeing who I want when I want, and great sex (not enough great sex tho)so I don't think I want to change that right now.
I'm glad you enjoyed your date tho |
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"My last vanilla date was about a month ago. I find them painful really.
The men I meet are charming, urbane, erudite...everything I would want and appear very "vanilla".
However, I don't think I could be with someone into "straight" sex only so at what point do you mention the fishnets...you want him to wear to test the waters?!!
The only reason i would go on a vanilla date would be if i was looking for a relationship, so i would of told him beforehand, so he would then have the opportunity to cancel or not. Otherwise its not fair on the other person
That's the thing Diamond...I'm at that point where I think I'm ready for a relationship and testing the water.
When you meet someone it's "baby steps" for me. I would be overwhelmed and put off frankly if within a minute of meeting I had the persons life history and sexual habits so I certainly wouldn't do it.
But as I said, it's difficult finding "that point".
So if you went on a date with someone wanting it hopefully continue, would you sexually want to play with them as you do with meets? Or would you be happy with a more conventional sex life?.
Maybe if you go on a date and both want to meet again, tell them, before any feelings get involved on either side.
You could go on lots of dates but unless you where interested in taking it further you neednt tell them. But they are going to find out one way or another and for me it would be before emotions get involved.
They surprise you and be totall the same things as you"
I've not thought that far ahead, it's only been a matter of weeks that I've started to entertain the idea.
Could I have a "non kinky" relationship? No. Could I have a monogamous relationship? Yes. Would I want to? Erm...
As I've said, not given it too much thought, don't want to over think things. I think should I really "go for it" there'll be no ambiguity or deception. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"I am on the fishy site... but I only seem to attract bunny boilers who ask me almost immediately if I'm looking to get married again and have more kids (the answer is no in both cases)."
been there... amen brother!!!!
I can date.... but the great thing about me is that i am comfortable in my space and independence, so I am in no great rush... and if they come along they come along.....
but they will have to impress me as much as I will have to impress them.... |
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"Agree with a previous poster, no need to tell him about swinging unless think the relationship is heading somewhere"
Haha I agree with this, perhaps when the relationship reaches that point you mention that just hypothetically, if "we" were to get married how would you feel about honeymooning at Hedonism 2..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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ive had a few dates in the past few years.. it just confirmed that i prefer to be on my own. the evenings were nice but i couldn't do it as a regular thing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ive had a few dates in the past few years.. it just confirmed that i prefer to be on my own. the evenings were nice but i couldn't do it as a regular thing "
Since you're not into dating either - fancy a fuck? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ive had a few dates in the past few years.. it just confirmed that i prefer to be on my own. the evenings were nice but i couldn't do it as a regular thing
Since you're not into dating either - fancy a fuck? "
can i think about it? lol |
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"ive had a few dates in the past few years.. it just confirmed that i prefer to be on my own. the evenings were nice but i couldn't do it as a regular thing
Since you're not into dating either - fancy a fuck?
can i think about it? lol"
Nope.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ive had a few dates in the past few years.. it just confirmed that i prefer to be on my own. the evenings were nice but i couldn't do it as a regular thing
Since you're not into dating either - fancy a fuck?
can i think about it? lol
Nope.... "
well ive thought about it and come to the conclusion that alright then ive a few minutes spare |
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"ive had a few dates in the past few years.. it just confirmed that i prefer to be on my own. the evenings were nice but i couldn't do it as a regular thing
Since you're not into dating either - fancy a fuck?
can i think about it? lol
Nope....
well ive thought about it and come to the conclusion that alright then ive a few minutes spare "
Are you implying that he is a 1 minute man?? |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
"
Do any of the other singles on the site date? Does it compliment your swinging or just seem strange?"
Yes and as it has nothing to do with "swinging" it neither compliments it or make it feel strange.... |
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"Sorry, but I'm a bit confused with the implied notion that a vanilla date/meet won't/can't involve really good sex!!
"
But then it would be a swinging meet. I would say a vanilla date is a proper date heading towards seeing them again ect, no sex. A swinging date involves sex unless its a social meet.
I wouldnt have sex with someone on a first date |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I shudder at the thought of doing the whole 'dating game' thing again.
Mind you, having said that, I used to end up pulling me nightie up for most of em anyway  |
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