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Forgive and forget
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We all have the ability to forgive but I don't think we ever forget. In life people screw you other, whether it's malicious or not. It's up to us to choose which people are worth moving forward and which are cut loose. If it's that bad, there's no place for forgiveness in my eyes. |
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Always forgive. Never forget.
I have no room for negativity and bitterness so forgiveness is my way of moving on from the event.
However.... I hold grudges and tend to cut ties in all ways with anyone who has tried to damage me instantly, never to return. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Murder. You can’t take that back can you? 
But other stuff, yeah I can forgive most things, we are human and it would be arrogant to assume I am better than them to hold them to judgement forever.
I forgive but don’t forget? So did you ever forgive them them?  or do you like to keep it in a drawer to pull it out and remind them(or remind yourself) when it suits. 
Forgiveness for me is easy when I like the person though? So, there’s that.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Genuinely I think all can be forgiven. I think whether I actually forgave someone would probably be down to how remorseful they were and how much of a change they made or were willing to make.
Don’t think all things are, or can always be, forgotten. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Taking the last cup of coffee from the cafetière.
What if they left little 'sorry' note and 20 quid for it  "
It’s too late.
The damage is done.
You make fresh or you discuss before hand with your coffee partner.
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By *host63Man
over a year ago
Bedfont Feltham |
"Forgive and Forget....we all.know the saying but.......
What is one thing that can't be forgiven or forgotten?? x"
I can forgive I never forget and while I wouldn’t bear any malice or desire for revenge I would treat someone who wronged me very differently in future. Protecting myself. |
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Have I forgiven my husband for getting d*unk with his workmates and standing me up on our date all those years ago? Of course I have, I still married the twit. Have I forgotten? Now where would be the fun in that?  |
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"Taking the last cup of coffee from the cafetière.
What if they left little 'sorry' note and 20 quid for it
It’s too late.
The damage is done.
You make fresh or you discuss before hand with your coffee partner.
"
Oh dear, this suddenly feels very real and it must still hurt. Sorry to have awaken up those strong emotions |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can let things go, forgive if you like, but I never forget. Once a trust has been broken a relationship, any relationship, is never the same.
Forgiving is about the forgiver and how they feel. |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South |
"I don't think forgiveness is necessary in order to live your life without bitterness. Some things are so awful that if they happened to me I wouldn't want to forgive them or forget them."
Agree!
I’m not really a very forgiving person. But also, I’m not bitter. I just move on. |
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"I don't think forgiveness is necessary in order to live your life without bitterness. Some things are so awful that if they happened to me I wouldn't want to forgive them or forget them.
Agree!
I’m not really a very forgiving person. But also, I’m not bitter. I just move on. "
Me too. I tend to acknowledge it happened and then get on with my life. I don't really forgive myself either |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think forgiveness is necessary in order to live your life without bitterness. Some things are so awful that if they happened to me I wouldn't want to forgive them or forget them."
This is true. Although I think if someone *wants* to forgive then they can forgive anything. |
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"I don't think forgiveness is necessary in order to live your life without bitterness. Some things are so awful that if they happened to me I wouldn't want to forgive them or forget them."
My grudges are against truly awful things and I am working towards resolving the intense feelings of 24 years of resentment, hate and vengeance towards them, In order to achieve peace for me.
Being able to forgive others is a important part of my meditive spiritual journey |
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"I don't think forgiveness is necessary in order to live your life without bitterness. Some things are so awful that if they happened to me I wouldn't want to forgive them or forget them.
My grudges are against truly awful things and I am working towards resolving the intense feelings of 24 years of resentment, hate and vengeance towards them, In order to achieve peace for me.
Being able to forgive others is a important part of my meditive spiritual journey "
I understand. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I generally forgive most things after the initial grumble and growl i dont care enough really about most things to hold mistakes against people only exception is if they have seriously gone after my people and hurt them they go on the justice list
Myself on the other hand i rarely forgive and can be very very hard on myself when i make fuckups in my life even if i had no control over it il blame and punish myself for not seeing not doing not reacting and for losing whenever things go wrong |
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"I don't think forgiveness is necessary in order to live your life without bitterness. Some things are so awful that if they happened to me I wouldn't want to forgive them or forget them.
This is true. Although I think if someone *wants* to forgive then they can forgive anything. "
That is probably true. I honestly don't give most people who've done things to me that require forgiveness much thought. The people I love I forgive automatically. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Always forgive, to fail to do so means you carry poison inside you, never forget.
I don't think not forgiving is failure on my part. "
I didn't say it was, just that it's counter-productive |
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"Always forgive, to fail to do so means you carry poison inside you, never forget.
I don't think not forgiving is failure on my part.
I didn't say it was, just that it's counter-productive"
Ok. I'm truly not being pedantic (well I am a bit) but you did use the word fail |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Always forgive, to fail to do so means you carry poison inside you, never forget.
I don't think not forgiving is failure on my part.
I didn't say it was, just that it's counter-productive
Ok. I'm truly not being pedantic (well I am a bit) but you did use the word fail"
You're right, you are pedantic |
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"Always forgive, to fail to do so means you carry poison inside you, never forget.
I don't think not forgiving is failure on my part.
I didn't say it was, just that it's counter-productive
Ok. I'm truly not being pedantic (well I am a bit) but you did use the word fail
You're right, you are pedantic "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think forgiveness is necessary in order to live your life without bitterness. Some things are so awful that if they happened to me I wouldn't want to forgive them or forget them.
My grudges are against truly awful things and I am working towards resolving the intense feelings of 24 years of resentment, hate and vengeance towards them, In order to achieve peace for me.
Being able to forgive others is a important part of my meditive spiritual journey "
That last sentence  . Exactly that! |
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"Forgive and Forget....we all.know the saying but.......
What is one thing that can't be forgiven or forgotten?? x"
Hmmm from much experience ~ The taking of a good fathers children, property, pension and future income by heavily gender biased, illegal (human and child rights violating), utterly corrupt family courts who totally support bitter, spiteful ex's at whatever cost to the children's mental and psychological health. |
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"Forgive and Forget....we all.know the saying but.......
What is one thing that can't be forgiven or forgotten?? x"
As somebody who has been forgiven for misgivings and who has also forgiven, I feel forgiveness is important for reaching peace, but things cannot be forgotten and just moved on from.
To learn and grow it’s important to not forget, especially for the person seeking forgiveness.  |
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You can forgive and should do so any anger you have doesn’t consume you, rule your life or indeed tar others with the same biased brush.
Forgetting though is very different. If you forget what lesson have you learnt. You can forget to a point so you don’t, as an example, constantly throw something in someone’s face. |
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I’ve forgiven. I’ve been forgiven.
Forgetting is much harder and not very wise as it’s experience that make us choose better paths next time. I find that memories of painful times come with a gut wrench and so it’s difficult to forget when the reminder is a physical reaction.
As for the unforgivable things, I’m lucky I haven’t been faced with any yet.
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There was 1 person in my life I can never forgive and I had to cut them out completely. Another I tried so hard to forgive but every now & then does something to make me remember why I’ve never really forgiven them.
Forget? Never
J x |
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By *mooth8Man
over a year ago
s hertfordshire |
@Spurs chick
"You can forgive and should do so any anger you have doesn’t consume you, rule your life or indeed tar others with the same biased brush.
Forgetting though is very different. If you forget what lesson have you learnt. You can forget to a point so you don’t, as an example, constantly throw something in someone’s face. "
something you hzve to be good at when youre a Spurs supporter  |
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"Forgive and Forget....we all.know the saying but.......
What is one thing that can't be forgiven or forgotten?? x
Hmmm from much experience ~ The taking of a good fathers children, property, pension and future income by heavily gender biased, illegal (human and child rights violating), utterly corrupt family courts who totally support bitter, spiteful ex's at whatever cost to the children's mental and psychological health."
Not that you're bitter about it |
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"Forgive and Forget....we all.know the saying but.......
What is one thing that can't be forgiven or forgotten?? x"
Crossing a picket line would be a big one for me. That act of deliberate and blatant undermining of your peers would be a hard thing to forgive, and impossible to forget. |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
Nope, don’t forgive or forget. I just wait long enough for them to think its all blown over then its tomato juice on the car, or dog shit on the door step, their phone number in the toilet stall etc. |
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By *mooth8Man
over a year ago
s hertfordshire |
"Forgive and Forget....we all.know the saying but.......
What is one thing that can't be forgiven or forgotten?? x
Hmmm from much experience ~ The taking of a good fathers children, property, pension and future income by heavily gender biased, illegal (human and child rights violating), utterly corrupt family courts who totally support bitter, spiteful ex's at whatever cost to the children's mental and psychological health.
Not that you're bitter about it"
maybe if it happened to you...
just saying |
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By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
I guess a lot depends on the person or situation, your partner cheating on you, no way could you forgive, let alone forget, not turning up or doing something when you say you will, different story |
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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago
Durham, North Yorkshire and can travel |
You can definitely forgive but can you totally forget?... I don't think so, but you can decide to leave it in the past where things belong, draw a line and move forwards. It's no good holding on to negative emotions or they destroy you in the end. Forgive, leave it behind and move on. |
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"Forgive and Forget....we all.know the saying but.......
What is one thing that can't be forgiven or forgotten?? x"
Heavy post. Emotional abuse of a child. I'll never forgive or forget. Don't give a shit about what was directed at me, this is unforgivable. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
I forgive easily I don’t want that shit binding me to person in a negative way, it’s very unhealthy and damages you. Try to deal with things and then move on, what’s to be gained by doing anything else? |
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Forgive if they made a genuine mistake or are genuinely sorry. Forget too if they are people close to me.
Forgive if they are evil twats. For my own sake not theirs. Don't forget, unless that is best for myself too.
Though people in the paragraph above will be out of my life forever |
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Begs the question; do you have to forgive and forget to be able to move on? I don't think so, personally. That shit's not living with me and affecting my family life now. I'm very sure though, that there are times when there should be no forgiveness. |
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Recently In our local paper a young lad crashed his car and killed his girlfriend and the parents of the girl pleaded with the courts not to jail him I’m not sure I could if I was in that situation the lad was speeding and showing off and crashed he did get a custodial sentence in the end |
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"Forgive and Forget....we all.know the saying but.......
What is one thing that can't be forgiven or forgotten?? x
Heavy post. Emotional abuse of a child. I'll never forgive or forget. Don't give a shit about what was directed at me, this is unforgivable."
Here here.... |
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"Forgive and Forget....we all.know the saying but.......
What is one thing that can't be forgiven or forgotten?? x
Hmmm from much experience ~ The taking of a good fathers children, property, pension and future income by heavily gender biased, illegal (human and child rights violating), utterly corrupt family courts who totally support bitter, spiteful ex's at whatever cost to the children's mental and psychological health.
Not that you're bitter about it
maybe if it happened to you...
just saying"
Exactly... |
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That is unforgivable 
