FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Why do men do this?
Why do men do this?
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By *inx.x3 OP Woman
over a year ago
Bath |
Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well 
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
Showing off?
Trying to make conversation?
Trying to see if you get jealous?
I would only do that with friends who I would like to think are interested in what I get up to, and not as a precursor to showing them my almighty penis. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
"
Have you asked him what the bleeping bleep is wrong with him?
Never had that thankfully. I'd just bin him immediately.
Pics, veris and videos on profiles of other meets put me off anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
"
Having never done it myself I'm not entirely sure. However I'll have a guess. I'm gonna guess its because the men so vastly out number women here.
Its like a kind of CV. As if to say "see someone else let me so you should to".
Let's be honest, with how confusing things are between men and women are these days, I can see why some men are trying everything to see what works and what doesn't. Women don't even know what they want half the time so how were expected to know I've never understood. |
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I think it's a different mindset. They possibly view you as a friend first and foremost.
Slightly different but a friend's husband left her for a much younger woman. He then proceeded to email her details of their adventures together. 
"Here we are on holiday horse riding'
"Here's my new lover enjoying a meal" etc
Either he was being deliberately hurtful or was too stupid to realise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it's a different mindset. They possibly view you as a friend first and foremost.
Slightly different but a friend's husband left her for a much younger woman. He then proceeded to email her details of their adventures together.
"Here we are on holiday horse riding'
"Here's my new lover enjoying a meal" etc
Either he was being deliberately hurtful or was too stupid to realise."
Probably both.  |
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"I think it's a different mindset. They possibly view you as a friend first and foremost.
Slightly different but a friend's husband left her for a much younger woman. He then proceeded to email her details of their adventures together.
"Here we are on holiday horse riding'
"Here's my new lover enjoying a meal" etc
Either he was being deliberately hurtful or was too stupid to realise.
Probably both. "
Probably. I really dislikes him after that. He was a lot older than my friend and left her for a woman in her early 20s when he was mid 70s because he " needed to experience life". Maybe he did but why couldn't he experience life with my friend?  he hurt her badly. |
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By *al kalMan
over a year ago
london |
Not judging but seems a bit weird.
How does it make you feel OP?
Perhaps he thinks it’s will impress you some how.
Look at me I can take woman on holiday…
Look at me I can get dates with so many woman…
Look at me I’m such a catch yet I want to spend time with you…
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it's a different mindset. They possibly view you as a friend first and foremost.
Slightly different but a friend's husband left her for a much younger woman. He then proceeded to email her details of their adventures together.
"Here we are on holiday horse riding'
"Here's my new lover enjoying a meal" etc
Either he was being deliberately hurtful or was too stupid to realise.
Probably both.
Probably. I really dislikes him after that. He was a lot older than my friend and left her for a woman in her early 20s when he was mid 70s because he " needed to experience life". Maybe he did but why couldn't he experience life with my friend? he hurt her badly."
Definitely both then.
Hope she was happier without him.  |
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By *inx.x3 OP Woman
over a year ago
Bath |
"I might mention I have a meet if I'm asked what I'm doing that week. Not sure if that's what you mean?"
No… this is I had a date this weekend, it was great… followed by 16 pictures and 1 video of what they did all weekend.
I now know what she looks like, what meal they had, what they did for the weekend etc and a cute little video of them posing together and then smiling at each other lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s kind of showing off isn’t it?
I’ve got some nice memes if that’s your thing, but I would never show a photo of me having sex with someone else, simply why? Is it to set your expectations or make you feel horny somehow? I dunno, but I don’t want to see a guy with you. |
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By *inx.x3 OP Woman
over a year ago
Bath |
"Showing off?
Trying to make conversation?
Trying to see if you get jealous?
I would only do that with friends who I would like to think are interested in what I get up to, and not as a precursor to showing them my almighty penis."
Totally agree I’d send stuff like that to a actual friend.
Ooo… Maybe he sees me as a friend  |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"Is that what someone who was polyamorous might do? "
Yeah; a poly dick/silly sausage who's not checked how you feel about seeing them/if you want to.
It sounds a bit like an odd form of peacocking, has it made you more keen to go on a date with him?
Maybe you're just good friends and he's sharing it as friends. |
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"I think it's a different mindset. They possibly view you as a friend first and foremost.
Slightly different but a friend's husband left her for a much younger woman. He then proceeded to email her details of their adventures together.
"Here we are on holiday horse riding'
"Here's my new lover enjoying a meal" etc
Either he was being deliberately hurtful or was too stupid to realise.
Probably both.
Probably. I really dislikes him after that. He was a lot older than my friend and left her for a woman in her early 20s when he was mid 70s because he " needed to experience life". Maybe he did but why couldn't he experience life with my friend? he hurt her badly.
Definitely both then.
Hope she was happier without him. "
She got her life back on an even keel. He even suggested that him and his new lady came and stayed with my friend.  .
My friends first language is not English. I taught her a new phrase
"There's no fool like an old fool" |
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By *inx.x3 OP Woman
over a year ago
Bath |
"I think it's a different mindset. They possibly view you as a friend first and foremost.
Slightly different but a friend's husband left her for a much younger woman. He then proceeded to email her details of their adventures together.
"Here we are on holiday horse riding'
"Here's my new lover enjoying a meal" etc
Either he was being deliberately hurtful or was too stupid to realise.
Probably both.
Probably. I really dislikes him after that. He was a lot older than my friend and left her for a woman in her early 20s when he was mid 70s because he " needed to experience life". Maybe he did but why couldn't he experience life with my friend? he hurt her badly.
Definitely both then.
Hope she was happier without him. "
Aww I hope your friend is happier now x |
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"Showing off?
Trying to make conversation?
Trying to see if you get jealous?
I would only do that with friends who I would like to think are interested in what I get up to, and not as a precursor to showing them my almighty penis."
I wouldn’t send pics or videos of someone else to anyone not even friends! Does she know he’s sending these? |
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"I think it's a different mindset. They possibly view you as a friend first and foremost.
Slightly different but a friend's husband left her for a much younger woman. He then proceeded to email her details of their adventures together.
"Here we are on holiday horse riding'
"Here's my new lover enjoying a meal" etc
Either he was being deliberately hurtful or was too stupid to realise.
Probably both.
Probably. I really dislikes him after that. He was a lot older than my friend and left her for a woman in her early 20s when he was mid 70s because he " needed to experience life". Maybe he did but why couldn't he experience life with my friend? he hurt her badly.
Definitely both then.
Hope she was happier without him.
Aww I hope your friend is happier now x"
It was a long time ago.  |
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I'd have said to make you jealous maybe? Or he does just see you as a friend.
With my experience guy I was seeing on a more regular basis admitted to me twice he was jealous knowing I had met up with someone else While he was telling me I'm the only one he was meeting sexually with yet I know for fact that's not the case.
I feel its non of my business who the other person meets up with. I've no interest in it. I stop them right there if they try and give me details.
If you're happy to share details with each other kool, if you don't want to need to respect each other boundaries on that |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
"
Beef or lamb?
A |
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"You been friend zoned it seems
It’s not this. He asked me to go and spend the week with him in Oxford last week as he was working away and share his hotel room.
In a non-friend way lol "
If I were you I'd just ask him to stop. I'm willing to bet you 20p and a small bar of Dairy Milk that if you tell him you find it a turn off he'll stop immediately  |
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"Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
Have you asked him what the bleeping bleep is wrong with him?
Never had that thankfully. I'd just bin him immediately.
Pics, veris and videos on profiles of other meets put me off anyway."
Deletes picture of me spuds deep in Jim's mum from message.......
Winston |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You been friend zoned it seems
It’s not this. He asked me to go and spend the week with him in Oxford last week as he was working away and share his hotel room.
In a non-friend way lol
If I were you I'd just ask him to stop. I'm willing to bet you 20p and a small bar of Dairy Milk that if you tell him you find it a turn off he'll stop immediately "
I agree.
I have learnt that if a guy does anything that I don’t like, I tell him I find it a turn off and it stops immediately.
Most guys don’t want to jeopardise the chance of a fuck  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have you asked him?
I wouldn’t give him the satisfaction to think I’m bothered by it.
Saying nothing is acceptance of it
"
Not sure that would stand up in court. |
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By *avie65Man
over a year ago
In the west. |
"You been friend zoned it seems
It’s not this. He asked me to go and spend the week with him in Oxford last week as he was working away and share his hotel room.
In a non-friend way lol
If I were you I'd just ask him to stop. I'm willing to bet you 20p and a small bar of Dairy Milk that if you tell him you find it a turn off he'll stop immediately
I agree.
I have learnt that if a guy does anything that I don’t like, I tell him I find it a turn off and it stops immediately.
Most guys don’t want to jeopardise the chance of a fuck "
Surely you don't mean men are shallow and they'd do anything to get their anaconda inside woman's lady garden? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You been friend zoned it seems
It’s not this. He asked me to go and spend the week with him in Oxford last week as he was working away and share his hotel room.
In a non-friend way lol
If I were you I'd just ask him to stop. I'm willing to bet you 20p and a small bar of Dairy Milk that if you tell him you find it a turn off he'll stop immediately
I agree.
I have learnt that if a guy does anything that I don’t like, I tell him I find it a turn off and it stops immediately.
Most guys don’t want to jeopardise the chance of a fuck
Surely you don't mean men are shallow and they'd do anything to get their anaconda inside woman's lady garden? "
Noooooo, as if I would imply such a thing  |
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By *inx.x3 OP Woman
over a year ago
Bath |
"Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
Beef or lamb?
A"
Haha …Looks like lamb and she had chicken.
Looks like a terrible restaurant roast though… There’s peas on the plate. Eugh. |
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By *inx.x3 OP Woman
over a year ago
Bath |
"You been friend zoned it seems
It’s not this. He asked me to go and spend the week with him in Oxford last week as he was working away and share his hotel room.
In a non-friend way lol
If I were you I'd just ask him to stop. I'm willing to bet you 20p and a small bar of Dairy Milk that if you tell him you find it a turn off he'll stop immediately
I agree.
I have learnt that if a guy does anything that I don’t like, I tell him I find it a turn off and it stops immediately.
Most guys don’t want to jeopardise the chance of a fuck "
We went on a single date in Jan 2021 (no sex). He’s been waiting a long time for his shag |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
Have you asked him what the bleeping bleep is wrong with him?
Never had that thankfully. I'd just bin him immediately.
Pics, veris and videos on profiles of other meets put me off anyway.
Deletes picture of me spuds deep in Jim's mum from message.......
Winston"
 (spud) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You been friend zoned it seems
It’s not this. He asked me to go and spend the week with him in Oxford last week as he was working away and share his hotel room.
In a non-friend way lol
If I were you I'd just ask him to stop. I'm willing to bet you 20p and a small bar of Dairy Milk that if you tell him you find it a turn off he'll stop immediately
I agree.
I have learnt that if a guy does anything that I don’t like, I tell him I find it a turn off and it stops immediately.
Most guys don’t want to jeopardise the chance of a fuck
We went on a single date in Jan 2021 (no sex). He’s been waiting a long time for his shag "
Are you going to shag him?
He will be sharing the pics of you fucking and eating to all his other women. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some guys do like to know so I think they assume women want to know. Going back a couple of years I had 3 FWB and one of them was very interested in what I was getting up to. He wanted me to enjoy myself. He liked that I was experimenting. I didn't share any prurient details, but he would tell me a bit about who he was seeing as well. No personal details from either of us, it was more about the experience. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is that what someone who was polyamorous might do?
No they'd probably bang on about it. Much like vegans and members of the territorial army."
You don't know a soul who's poly, do you? |
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Surely be should be enjoying her company and far too busy to be taking all those photos to send to you... If a guy did that on a date with me, I'd be seriously put off. It's just weird. I never take photos on dates.
Maybe just put him out of his misery and block him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is that what someone who was polyamorous might do?
No they'd probably bang on about it. Much like vegans and members of the territorial army.
You don't know a soul who's poly, do you? "
The idea that poly people tell everyone they’re poly is so far from the truth that even as a joke it doesn’t make sense.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t and I can’t see why someone would.
Maybe he’s trying to make conversation or think you might be interested in what he has going on in his life. Other people just like to talk about themselves constantly and when they run out of things to say the brain will just come up with anything to keep the subject on them |
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"Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
"
There is a hypothesis that men become more attractive when other women see that women desire them. Being seen talking to an attractive woman increases the males attractiveness by onlooking women. I imagine they are trying to apply this social theory to fab messages |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Reading this thread got me thinking. I have spoken about previous meets when I’ve gone for a social with someone. But only to say I’ve had meets, I don’t go into detail and would never share photos. I may have been a bit enthusiastic thinking about it but that’s because I was nervous and being on a social with someone from fab, you tend to talk about sex stuff to a degree  |
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"Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
There is a hypothesis that men become more attractive when other women see that women desire them. Being seen talking to an attractive woman increases the males attractiveness by onlooking women. I imagine they are trying to apply this social theory to fab messages"
That's interesting I wonder if it's true in some cases. I don't think it works that way with me but I wouldn't be aware of it if it did so ... Is the reverse true? A woman becomes more attractive to men if she talks to a good looking man? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is that what someone who was polyamorous might do?
No they'd probably bang on about it. Much like vegans and members of the territorial army.
You don't know a soul who's poly, do you?
The idea that poly people tell everyone they’re poly is so far from the truth that even as a joke it doesn’t make sense. "
It's just meant to put people down ... |
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"Is that what someone who was polyamorous might do?
No they'd probably bang on about it. Much like vegans and members of the territorial army.
You don't know a soul who's poly, do you?
The idea that poly people tell everyone they’re poly is so far from the truth that even as a joke it doesn’t make sense. "
My comment was a genuine question. I don't know a lot about polyamorous relationships but I thought someone who was in one might tell their other partners about meals out they'd had with one of the others in the relationship. My intention wasn't to suggest that they would tell all and sundry |
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By *avie65Man
over a year ago
In the west. |
"You been friend zoned it seems
It’s not this. He asked me to go and spend the week with him in Oxford last week as he was working away and share his hotel room.
In a non-friend way lol
If I were you I'd just ask him to stop. I'm willing to bet you 20p and a small bar of Dairy Milk that if you tell him you find it a turn off he'll stop immediately
I agree.
I have learnt that if a guy does anything that I don’t like, I tell him I find it a turn off and it stops immediately.
Most guys don’t want to jeopardise the chance of a fuck
Surely you don't mean men are shallow and they'd do anything to get their anaconda inside woman's lady garden?
Noooooo, as if I would imply such a thing "
I didn't think you would imply such a thing. And of course men are not that shallow. |
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"Before I start… I know all men don’t and I’m sure some women do it as well
They tell you about dates they have had with other women and send you pictures of their great weekend together… even when you didn’t ask for them.
While also asking to meet up constantly.
What’s the point in it?
What response am I supposed to give other then a ‘looks like a nice weekend but your roast looks dry’ lol
& no he’s not from fab.
There is a hypothesis that men become more attractive when other women see that women desire them. Being seen talking to an attractive woman increases the males attractiveness by onlooking women. I imagine they are trying to apply this social theory to fab messages
That's interesting I wonder if it's true in some cases. I don't think it works that way with me but I wouldn't be aware of it if it did so ... Is the reverse true? A woman becomes more attractive to men if she talks to a good looking man?"
I dont think it does but i cant remember the ressarch research clearly. It is to do with social status and mens perceived value to women increases when their social status is raised. I assume there is some evolutionary mechanism at play |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sadly OP - because most men that are on here only have one thought - "how quick can I talk this women into bed"
The art of conversation as been overtaken by lust
Or am I being cynical
J xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Totally depends , never if only a once off but if regular and topic crops up , as in both are curious but trust each other well then ya simply because both trust each other and are not jealous which is important. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is that what someone who was polyamorous might do?
No they'd probably bang on about it. Much like vegans and members of the territorial army.
You don't know a soul who's poly, do you?
The idea that poly people tell everyone they’re poly is so far from the truth that even as a joke it doesn’t make sense.
My comment was a genuine question. I don't know a lot about polyamorous relationships but I thought someone who was in one might tell their other partners about meals out they'd had with one of the others in the relationship. My intention wasn't to suggest that they would tell all and sundry"
I wasn't responding to your comment, sorry NC. I believe it would completely depend on what was agreed with one's partners, what level of sharing was needed, consented to by all parties involved. |
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