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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've seen this word being used a lot recently.
However - people appear to be using this as a covert way of insulting/mocking other people.
You can't say well people are too sensitive as you aren't that person or know how that person feels.
I believe people of all ages in society nowadays lack the word - respect.
Have a good week.   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've seen this word being used a lot recently.
However - people appear to be using this as a covert way of insulting/mocking other people.
You can't say well people are too sensitive as you aren't that person or know how that person feels.
I believe people of all ages in society nowadays lack the word - respect.
Have a good week. "
Good observation, and this is why I will only have light banter with strangers and go for the throat with close friends.
I’ve always said - know your audience. |
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"I've seen this word being used a lot recently.
However - people appear to be using this as a covert way of insulting/mocking other people.
You can't say well people are too sensitive as you aren't that person or know how that person feels.
I believe people of all ages in society nowadays lack the word - respect.
Have a good week. "
I agree, Banter is a playful ribbing between mates that know it is all "just a laugh". If peoples' feelings are hurt, then that's just insulting.
Cal |
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"I've seen this word being used a lot recently.
However - people appear to be using this as a covert way of insulting/mocking other people.
You can't say well people are too sensitive as you aren't that person or know how that person feels.
I believe people of all ages in society nowadays lack the word - respect.
Have a good week.
Good observation, and this is why I will only have light banter with strangers and go for the throat with close friends.
I’ve always said - know your audience. "
Exactly this |
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It's in the same basket as someone saying they are a cnut but that's just who they are and people need to accept that!
Some confuse that with being a strong character.
It's often the same people using these words that claim they don't give a fuck what others think of them but in doing so they prove that they don't give a fuck what they say to others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im from a team sport background spent my life surrounded by lad banter knobhead comments and practical jokes like deep heat in the undies
excess shampooing
shoes in the showers its all like a bad police academy movie sometimes its taken well sometimes it ends in fights but this is the tinternet things can be said things can be read but the good news is most of it isnt personal and nobodies privates are on fire
Suppose you have to go by how someone takes it |
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I’ve seen an increasing number of people use it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card after they’ve gone too far. Banter is based on unspoken consent - you know how far you can go with your friends, and they know your limits too.
Ripping into someone or harassing them and then claiming “it was only banter, lighten up” is the sign of a bully. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve seen an increasing number of people use it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card after they’ve gone too far. Banter is based on unspoken consent - you know how far you can go with your friends, and they know your limits too.
Ripping into someone or harassing them and then claiming “it was only banter, lighten up” is the sign of a bully. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’ll always happen in here
It always has
If you don’t agree etc just add a respectful comment, but no need to carry on if it becomes personal etc. You don’t fuel a fire , unless it’s a bbq or bonfire  |
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The word banter used to send shivers down my spine, especially when it was used by Eton and rugger boys. Then suddenly everyone starting using it.
In the old days it was just called taking the piss.
Growing up in Ireland so much, slagging is just normal, it's how you talk to each other, some people can't handle it though. People are far too sensitive these days. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The word banter used to send shivers down my spine, especially when it was used by Eton and rugger boys. Then suddenly everyone starting using it.
In the old days it was just called taking the piss.
Growing up in Ireland so much, slagging is just normal, it's how you talk to each other, some people can't handle it though. People are far too sensitive these days. "
But the ‘slagging’ was with people you knew well ??
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The word banter used to send shivers down my spine, especially when it was used by Eton and rugger boys. Then suddenly everyone starting using it.
In the old days it was just called taking the piss.
Growing up in Ireland so much, slagging is just normal, it's how you talk to each other, some people can't handle it though. People are far too sensitive these days. "
Eton used "banter"?  I believe it was "repartee", surely.  |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"The word banter used to send shivers down my spine, especially when it was used by Eton and rugger boys. Then suddenly everyone starting using it.
In the old days it was just called taking the piss.
Growing up in Ireland so much, slagging is just normal, it's how you talk to each other, some people can't handle it though. People are far too sensitive these days.
But the ‘slagging’ was with people you knew well ??
"
This
Context and audience are the two important factors.
Banter between total strangers is nigh on impossible.
Between friends you'll know their likely reaction, the subjects to avoid and how far to go without risking offence.
With online acquaintances you'll eventually find a middle ground but even then there'll be times when things are sad that aren't recieved as just banter. Because much as you think you might, you don't necessarily know them as well as you think you do.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So many great posts on this thread I’d like quote.
I can’t bear the words banter, as other have said, it’s quite often used as an excuse to be shitty. "
Bants? |
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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"I’ve seen an increasing number of people use it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card after they’ve gone too far. Banter is based on unspoken consent - you know how far you can go with your friends, and they know your limits too.
Ripping into someone or harassing them and then claiming “it was only banter, lighten up” is the sign of a bully. "
This is known as the "Schrodingers Arsehole"
Step 1. Be a dick.
Step 2. Wait for reaction
Step 3(a). If reaction is positive/ambivalent then carry on.
Step 3(b). If reaction is negative then backpedal and claim "bants" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So many great posts on this thread I’d like quote.
I can’t bear the words banter, as other have said, it’s quite often used as an excuse to be shitty. "
What about craic?
I don't mind the word, I mind when people gaslight me saying abuse is banter. See misogyny reworded as banter quite a lot here. |
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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"As far as I’m concerned if you're having to explain something was only a bit of banter then you’ve already gone way too far"
As said, it has to be contextual and agreeable to all concerned. I once explained to a counsellor who was running a course (who had never worked with military before) that what we would often describe as workplace banter would be classed as systemic bullying anywhere else. It is definitely a huge adjustment for many leaving the services. |
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"I’ve seen an increasing number of people use it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card after they’ve gone too far. Banter is based on unspoken consent - you know how far you can go with your friends, and they know your limits too.
Ripping into someone or harassing them and then claiming “it was only banter, lighten up” is the sign of a bully.
This is known as the "Schrodingers Arsehole"
Step 1. Be a dick.
Step 2. Wait for reaction
Step 3(a). If reaction is positive/ambivalent then carry on.
Step 3(b). If reaction is negative then backpedal and claim "bants""
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The word banter used to send shivers down my spine, especially when it was used by Eton and rugger boys. Then suddenly everyone starting using it.
In the old days it was just called taking the piss.
Growing up in Ireland so much, slagging is just normal, it's how you talk to each other, some people can't handle it though. People are far too sensitive these days. "
This.
My wee Granny could tear strips off you taking the piss and it was hilarious, just part of growing up.
On a night out, if I'm talking to a guy and I can't slag him or he doesn't give a wee bit of chat back I get bored very, very easily.
There's a clear distinction between taking the piss/banter and just being cruel though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve seen an increasing number of people use it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card after they’ve gone too far. Banter is based on unspoken consent - you know how far you can go with your friends, and they know your limits too.
Ripping into someone or harassing them and then claiming “it was only banter, lighten up” is the sign of a bully.
This is known as the "Schrodingers Arsehole"
Step 1. Be a dick.
Step 2. Wait for reaction
Step 3(a). If reaction is positive/ambivalent then carry on.
Step 3(b). If reaction is negative then backpedal and claim "bants""
When people REPEATEDLY pronounce their derogatory opinions about a certain group of people's preference in threads under the guise that it's a joke or banter and their friends claiming that those who say enough is enough are playing 'victim'. |
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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"I’ve seen an increasing number of people use it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card after they’ve gone too far. Banter is based on unspoken consent - you know how far you can go with your friends, and they know your limits too.
Ripping into someone or harassing them and then claiming “it was only banter, lighten up” is the sign of a bully.
This is known as the "Schrodingers Arsehole"
Step 1. Be a dick.
Step 2. Wait for reaction
Step 3(a). If reaction is positive/ambivalent then carry on.
Step 3(b). If reaction is negative then backpedal and claim "bants"
When people REPEATEDLY pronounce their derogatory opinions about a certain group of people's preference in threads under the guise that it's a joke or banter and their friends claiming that those who say enough is enough are playing 'victim'."
That is another issue where people will defend those with bad takes, just because they are either popular or in with the right clique.
Although there are definitely no cliques I'm the forums. Honest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’ve seen an increasing number of people use it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card after they’ve gone too far. Banter is based on unspoken consent - you know how far you can go with your friends, and they know your limits too.
Ripping into someone or harassing them and then claiming “it was only banter, lighten up” is the sign of a bully.
This is known as the "Schrodingers Arsehole"
Step 1. Be a dick.
Step 2. Wait for reaction
Step 3(a). If reaction is positive/ambivalent then carry on.
Step 3(b). If reaction is negative then backpedal and claim "bants"
When people REPEATEDLY pronounce their derogatory opinions about a certain group of people's preference in threads under the guise that it's a joke or banter and their friends claiming that those who say enough is enough are playing 'victim'."
Oh, but they are so innocent though. They aren’t doing anything wrong 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’ve seen an increasing number of people use it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card after they’ve gone too far. Banter is based on unspoken consent - you know how far you can go with your friends, and they know your limits too.
Ripping into someone or harassing them and then claiming “it was only banter, lighten up” is the sign of a bully.
This is known as the "Schrodingers Arsehole"
Step 1. Be a dick.
Step 2. Wait for reaction
Step 3(a). If reaction is positive/ambivalent then carry on.
Step 3(b). If reaction is negative then backpedal and claim "bants"
When people REPEATEDLY pronounce their derogatory opinions about a certain group of people's preference in threads under the guise that it's a joke or banter and their friends claiming that those who say enough is enough are playing 'victim'.
Oh, but they are so innocent though. They aren’t doing anything wrong
"
Aren't they just? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’ve seen an increasing number of people use it as a ‘get out of jail free’ card after they’ve gone too far. Banter is based on unspoken consent - you know how far you can go with your friends, and they know your limits too.
Ripping into someone or harassing them and then claiming “it was only banter, lighten up” is the sign of a bully.
This is known as the "Schrodingers Arsehole"
Step 1. Be a dick.
Step 2. Wait for reaction
Step 3(a). If reaction is positive/ambivalent then carry on.
Step 3(b). If reaction is negative then backpedal and claim "bants"
When people REPEATEDLY pronounce their derogatory opinions about a certain group of people's preference in threads under the guise that it's a joke or banter and their friends claiming that those who say enough is enough are playing 'victim'.
Oh, but they are so innocent though. They aren’t doing anything wrong
Aren't they just?"
Yep |
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"Wouldn’t get on with me if you don’t like banter I like a woman who you can have banter "
It's not actually banter that's the problem, it's the people who don't know what banter is and just insult people and "call it banter". A bit of banter is only that if the person getting insulted knows it's a joke.
Cal |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've seen this word being used a lot recently.
However - people appear to be using this as a covert way of insulting/mocking other people.
You can't say well people are too sensitive as you aren't that person or know how that person feels.
I believe people of all ages in society nowadays lack the word - respect.
Have a good week. "
Well said. Cannot stand the term 'banter' followed by - it was a joke! Can't you take a joke? God You're so sensitive!
I called someone out for it recently, they thought it was ok to mock someone else - it was a joke! No mate.
People know exactly what they're doing when they do it
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wouldn’t get on with me if you don’t like banter I like a woman who you can have banter
It's not actually banter that's the problem, it's the people who don't know what banter is and just insult people and "call it banter". A bit of banter is only that if the person getting insulted knows it's a joke.
Cal"
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