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Do you apologise ….
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do. All the time with small things like someone bumping into me. But I’m getting better at not apologising for leaning on friends or being myself unless there’s a genuine need.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Those if you that do, could you try to cut down on one apology?
Pick a time where you do it (it was taking up space in a shop for me), and work on that as a starting point (if you want to obv). |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yep. Frequently.
I'm more aware of it now though and slowly stopping because I shouldn't apologise for existing. Feeling. Using my voice. Being me. "
Love this, this is exactly it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I apologise when I’m in the wrong or when it is polite too, but the mrs is a nightmare, she apologises for everything, even her friends tell her to stop saying sorry.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No I don't.
Saying sorry is often a facilitator for more devious means. Like jumping queues or making your requirements more important than others. Or disguising the fact that you actually meant something. |
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By *errocaWoman
over a year ago
Shropshire |
50p in the pot, every time you say sorry for no particular reason.. You'll soon stop.
I only apologise when I know I'm in the wrong.. I constantly say "no need to apologise " when people say sorry for silly things. |
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By *inx.x3Woman
over a year ago
Bath |
When you shouldn’t? No.
When you take up space somewhere you’re entitled to be (I.e a shop). No.
Asking for help… no
Saying no… sometimes il say no, sorry. As No just seems too harsh sometimes.
Stating how you feel? I rarely say how I feel.
I only really say sorry if I think I’m in the wrong so when I say it I mean it. |
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"I used to all the time. Then someone pointed out to me what I was doing, so I've tried to cut it back a bit. I do think about it more now."
Kind of this, but rather than someone pointing it out, I noticed it in others and thought it was unnecessary most of the time … then realised I did it myself ! |
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I used to but I'm trying to check myself now. When I remember to do so, I use substitutions such as:
I'm sorry, could you say that again? --- could you repeat that please?
Sorry, can I get passed? --- Excuse me, can I get passed?
Sorry, could you pass me the *** please? --- Hi, could you pass me the *** please? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm one of those annoying people who take up space in the shop and ask for help without a second thought because that's what it's for. People can always say excuse me if they need to get past.
I only say sorry if I am in the wrong |
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I try to say sorry only when I am at fault
The occasional unwarranted sorry does sneak out though.
I also use it sometimes when someone’s behaviour or comment is bang out of order and they appear oblivious too it.
I’ll say ‘ Sorry?’in a very distinct tone.
I might not have explained that very well. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm one of those annoying people who take up space in the shop and ask for help without a second thought because that's what it's for. People can always say excuse me if they need to get past.
I only say sorry if I am in the wrong"
It’s not annoying, you’re entitled to be there. |
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"I used to but I'm trying to check myself now. When I remember to do so, I use substitutions such as:
I'm sorry, could you say that again? --- could you repeat that please?
Sorry, can I get passed? --- Excuse me, can I get passed?
Sorry, could you pass me the *** please? --- Hi, could you pass me the *** please?"
This  |
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Don’t apologise for something you haven’t done or how you are feeling.
The exception to this is, as an example, if someone bumps into me in the supermarket or if trying to change direction as they are heading straight for you & and you both end up doing the two step dance shuffle a few times, then yes I will say sorry as just basic manners. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I used to but I'm trying to check myself now. When I remember to do so, I use substitutions such as:
I'm sorry, could you say that again? --- could you repeat that please?
Sorry, can I get passed? --- Excuse me, can I get passed?
Sorry, could you pass me the *** please? --- Hi, could you pass me the *** please?"
Love this  |
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When you take up space somewhere you’re entitled to be (I.e a shop) - No
Asking for help… - No, I always open this sort of interaction with excuse me.
Saying no… - Yes. It softens the blow of being told no in my mind
Stating how you feel? - No
I do over apologise in other areas not listed here like going to the same side as someone walking towards you when you try to avoid walking into each other etc.
Sorry for the long post |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm one of those annoying people who take up space in the shop and ask for help without a second thought because that's what it's for. People can always say excuse me if they need to get past.
I only say sorry if I am in the wrong
It’s not annoying, you’re entitled to be there. "
Thank you. I never thought about it until you posted this but I've always felt it was normal to simply feel comfortable being in that public space but thinking about it, people say sorry and move out of the way when I haven't even asked to pass yet. They see me approaching and move out of the way and say sorry at the same time. Sorry for what? They weren't in my way, especially if they move out of the way before I even got there. Sometimes, I'm not even looking to go past and there's that awkward "no, it's ok, I'm not going that way" moment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When you shouldn’t?
When you take up space somewhere you’re entitled to be (I.e a shop)
Asking for help…
Saying no…
Stating how you feel?
"
Did before just for Peace sake but not anymore , you learn the hard way ,some other people just don't give a fuck what way they act , the most dangerous person is one that is never wrong , believe me , totally dangerous . |
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"I may use sorry interchangeably with excuse me, but its not an apology.
I only apologise where I feel one is warranted, otherwise its just empty."
Irritates me when people do that. They say 'sorry' to you and expect you to know what they want! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr |
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"When you shouldn’t?
When you take up space somewhere you’re entitled to be (I.e a shop)
Asking for help…
Saying no…
Stating how you feel?
Did before just for Peace sake but not anymore , you learn the hard way ,some other people just don't give a fuck what way they act , the most dangerous person is one that is never wrong , believe me , totally dangerous ."
Oh I dunno ........... |
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Yes. I apologised yesterday for obstructing the aisle of a shoe shop. It's not my fault it's not designed with wheelchairs in mind, but still, I apologised. I also apologised for inconveniencing the nice lady who helped me get down a steep kerb on Saturday. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Obviously I say sorry when I know I'm wrong. I get that from my dad, not my mother. I've never had a problem apologising but when it comes to saying no, I say that more than ever now x |
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"When you shouldn’t?
When you take up space somewhere you’re entitled to be (I.e a shop)
Asking for help…
Saying no…
Stating how you feel?
"
Yes I do, it's an inherent British trait. My kids dont do it though! |
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If I’m in my own world (listening to a podcast or deep in thought) and some minor issue arises, then I’ll probably apologise without considering if I’m in the wrong or not.
But if I’m fuller aware I’m not doing anything wrong or inconsiderate I won’t apologise for no reason. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"All the damn time. My partner has started spanking me for unnecessary apologies. In a playful way though as he recognises it is common in abuse survivors. "
That’s sad  , but makes sense to me too. |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"Always I was built by manners and I add a smile in doing so
I don't think it's a measure of good manners to say sorry for no reason at all?"
But it becomes sarcastic when it's someone else whom should be saying it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm bad for it, I apologise when things are clearly outwith my control or obviously the other person's blame. I need to call out cuntish behaviour more really!! |
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Think its a very English thing to do, I am forever having to re read messages and amend. As rightly Basque has pointed out never start with sorry unless your in the wrong. Unfortunetly speach isnt that easy.  |
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