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Socially acceptable
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Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty? |
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"I just get weary of people wondering why people are so concerned about other people's sexual preferences."
Im more intrigued as to why it has to be a sexual preference rather than what a person finds attractive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everybody has a preference who they like to spend time with. That's their choice. Everyone will have an opinion on something and will be offended by something. That's life. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
I find it strange that anyone thinks it is acceptable to have preferences. We should all just shag anyone we see. Regardless of who they are, what they look like, what they are like and whether they want to or not.
Because that's the equality way of doing things.
 |
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"I just get weary of people wondering why people are so concerned about other people's sexual preferences.
Im more intrigued as to why it has to be a sexual preference rather than what a person finds attractive."
It is a preference, nobody has to justify it. People just need to crack on and find people within their own preferences. People see different things as attractive. Nobody complains when someone posts an attraction of redheads. |
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"I find it strange that anyone thinks it is acceptable to have preferences. We should all just shag anyone we see. Regardless of who they are, what they look like, what they are like and whether they want to or not.
Because that's the equality way of doing things.
"
Damn right! Gimme all the shags! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it percieved as a fetish? I’d see it the same as all the others you mentioned, their preference?
I guess so, but I don't see at as demonised as the later. Hence my question"
Where is it demonised? |
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"I just get weary of people wondering why people are so concerned about other people's sexual preferences.
Im more intrigued as to why it has to be a sexual preference rather than what a person finds attractive.
It is a preference, nobody has to justify it. People just need to crack on and find people within their own preferences. People see different things as attractive. Nobody complains when someone posts an attraction of redheads. "
Thats exactly my point. Why is there more of a negative perception of white men who like black women? Why is it automatically put into a fetish box rather than being accepted as thats what they consider to be beautiful. Not beautiful for a black woman. Beautiful, period. |
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"I just get weary of people wondering why people are so concerned about other people's sexual preferences.
Im more intrigued as to why it has to be a sexual preference rather than what a person finds attractive.
It is a preference, nobody has to justify it. People just need to crack on and find people within their own preferences. People see different things as attractive. Nobody complains when someone posts an attraction of redheads.
Thats exactly my point. Why is there more of a negative perception of white men who like black women? Why is it automatically put into a fetish box rather than being accepted as thats what they consider to be beautiful. Not beautiful for a black woman. Beautiful, period."
By who? This is literally the first I've heard about it being stigmatised since I was a teen and that was many years ago. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Say what you like an people should respond accordingly. The whole idea of stating a preference is to quickly sort what you want from what you don't - "isms" doesn't really come into sexual attraction as you can't help what you like and o matter how inclusive and open people these days think you should be, its not a choice its a desire outwith your own control. It's only a problem when you start to make a great big thing about it whilst being detrimental to all others, which I don't think you was saying at all. I certainly won't judge someone being honest about what they're after. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?"
No not really , everybody has their own thing going on . |
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"Sometimes I have sex with somebody who wasn’t of British origins and then I don’t post a thread about it.
Bum who you like.
Live long and prosper.
You've presumed a lot here but ok mate lol.
Im born n raised in London. Its one big mix of culture here and its something I've noticed more of on sites like these, so I'm merely trying to get a better understanding of the collective consciousness on this matter to see if there is something I've missed
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am mixed race and have never been with a mixed race woman. Does this mean I have a fetish for non-mixed race women?
Just let people like what they like. |
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"Say what you like an people should respond accordingly. The whole idea of stating a preference is to quickly sort what you want from what you don't - "isms" doesn't really come into sexual attraction as you can't help what you like and o matter how inclusive and open people these days think you should be, its not a choice its a desire outwith your own control. It's only a problem when you start to make a great big thing about it whilst being detrimental to all others, which I don't think you was saying at all. I certainly won't judge someone being honest about what they're after."
^^^All of this!^^^ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sometimes I have sex with somebody who wasn’t of British origins and then I don’t post a thread about it.
Bum who you like.
Live long and prosper.
You've presumed a lot here but ok mate lol.
Im born n raised in London. Its one big mix of culture here and its something I've noticed more of on sites like these, so I'm merely trying to get a better understanding of the collective consciousness on this matter to see if there is something I've missed
"
But who is judging you for liking or preferring black women?
You’re attracted to what you’re attracted to.
Who cares. |
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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago
Up North |
"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?"
No never seen that |
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"I just get weary of people wondering why people are so concerned about other people's sexual preferences.
Im more intrigued as to why it has to be a sexual preference rather than what a person finds attractive.
It is a preference, nobody has to justify it. People just need to crack on and find people within their own preferences. People see different things as attractive. Nobody complains when someone posts an attraction of redheads.
Thats exactly my point. Why is there more of a negative perception of white men who like black women? Why is it automatically put into a fetish box rather than being accepted as thats what they consider to be beautiful. Not beautiful for a black woman. Beautiful, period.
By who? This is literally the first I've heard about it being stigmatised since I was a teen and that was many years ago."
You're a white woman, so I'd be very surprised if you'd experienced this talking to black women on here as a white male lol.
I travel a lot with work too. Sometimes to rural parts of our country and the comments I get when people see my exgfs like "I could never sleep with a black woman" have confused me as I've never felt the need to perceive things in that way. I dont see anyones preference for who they like as anything more than that.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?
No never seen that"
There was a thread last week, possibly week before. He got slated but if I recall he worded it in the most dehumanising terms possible. |
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"I am mixed race and have never been with a mixed race woman. Does this mean I have a fetish for non-mixed race women?
Just let people like what they like."
Nah and thats my point bruv. It seems to be if your a white man and you like black or any other ethnicity other than white it must be a fetish of some kind lol |
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"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?
No never seen that
There was a thread last week, possibly week before. He got slated but if I recall he worded it in the most dehumanising terms possible. "
Then he's a fucking donut and clearly dosent understand the point of this matter. I've grown in a very mixed environment and I dont have black, brown, yellow, straight or gay mates. They're just my mates. Our gen grew different n we don't av much time for the foolishness.
Saying that as I wrote this I've just realised I am on a swing site, so maybe thats why I'm finding more black women challenging me to see if I am fetishising them as evidently there seems to be a lot of white men on here doing so lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I am mixed race and have never been with a mixed race woman. Does this mean I have a fetish for non-mixed race women?
Just let people like what they like.
Nah and thats my point bruv. It seems to be if your a white man and you like black or any other ethnicity other than white it must be a fetish of some kind lol"
I haven’t seen anything like that on here but I don’t doubt it happens. Just ignore it. You can’t help what you find attractive and if people have a problem with it it says more about them than you  |
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"I just get weary of people wondering why people are so concerned about other people's sexual preferences.
Im more intrigued as to why it has to be a sexual preference rather than what a person finds attractive.
It is a preference, nobody has to justify it. People just need to crack on and find people within their own preferences. People see different things as attractive. Nobody complains when someone posts an attraction of redheads.
Thats exactly my point. Why is there more of a negative perception of white men who like black women? Why is it automatically put into a fetish box rather than being accepted as thats what they consider to be beautiful. Not beautiful for a black woman. Beautiful, period.
By who? This is literally the first I've heard about it being stigmatised since I was a teen and that was many years ago.
You're a white woman, so I'd be very surprised if you'd experienced this talking to black women on here as a white male lol.
I travel a lot with work too. Sometimes to rural parts of our country and the comments I get when people see my exgfs like "I could never sleep with a black woman" have confused me as I've never felt the need to perceive things in that way. I dont see anyones preference for who they like as anything more than that.
"
You're right, I haven't experienced that as a white woman. (Or as I prefer to be called, a woman. Although you are making assumptions I'm not mixed race which many folk think I am)
What I have experienced though, is people sniffing around in my inbox wanting to fuck me BECAUSE I'm "white pussy". That feels like shit. I'm more than a cunt and more than my skin colour, so I do feel those who voice their preference in such a crude way are arseholes. Shitty, hairy, clinker laden arseholes. You can have sexual preferences yet be respectful with it, the 2 can and should go hand in hand. |
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"I am mixed race and have never been with a mixed race woman. Does this mean I have a fetish for non-mixed race women?
Just let people like what they like.
Nah and thats my point bruv. It seems to be if your a white man and you like black or any other ethnicity other than white it must be a fetish of some kind lol
I haven’t seen anything like that on here but I don’t doubt it happens. Just ignore it. You can’t help what you find attractive and if people have a problem with it it says more about them than you "
Haha fair point mate |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?
No never seen that
There was a thread last week, possibly week before. He got slated but if I recall he worded it in the most dehumanising terms possible.
Then he's a fucking donut and clearly dosent understand the point of this matter. I've grown in a very mixed environment and I dont have black, brown, yellow, straight or gay mates. They're just my mates. Our gen grew different n we don't av much time for the foolishness.
Saying that as I wrote this I've just realised I am on a swing site, so maybe thats why I'm finding more black women challenging me to see if I am fetishising them as evidently there seems to be a lot of white men on here doing so lol"
There is racism here. As in real life. And no doubt someone will come along to completely deny this is true. As on every thread about race. I don't blame black women for thinking you maybe have a fetish because they may well have encountered that attitude from other men here. |
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"I just get weary of people wondering why people are so concerned about other people's sexual preferences.
Im more intrigued as to why it has to be a sexual preference rather than what a person finds attractive.
It is a preference, nobody has to justify it. People just need to crack on and find people within their own preferences. People see different things as attractive. Nobody complains when someone posts an attraction of redheads.
Thats exactly my point. Why is there more of a negative perception of white men who like black women? Why is it automatically put into a fetish box rather than being accepted as thats what they consider to be beautiful. Not beautiful for a black woman. Beautiful, period.
By who? This is literally the first I've heard about it being stigmatised since I was a teen and that was many years ago.
You're a white woman, so I'd be very surprised if you'd experienced this talking to black women on here as a white male lol.
I travel a lot with work too. Sometimes to rural parts of our country and the comments I get when people see my exgfs like "I could never sleep with a black woman" have confused me as I've never felt the need to perceive things in that way. I dont see anyones preference for who they like as anything more than that.
You're right, I haven't experienced that as a white woman. (Or as I prefer to be called, a woman. Although you are making assumptions I'm not mixed race which many folk think I am)
What I have experienced though, is people sniffing around in my inbox wanting to fuck me BECAUSE I'm "white pussy". That feels like shit. I'm more than a cunt and more than my skin colour, so I do feel those who voice their preference in such a crude way are arseholes. Shitty, hairy, clinker laden arseholes. You can have sexual preferences yet be respectful with it, the 2 can and should go hand in hand."
Clinker laden arseholes hahahahha that is officially the quote of the day and I need to find a way to work that into a convo lol |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"There is racism here. As in real life. And no doubt someone will come along to completely deny this is true. As on every thread about race. I don't blame black women for thinking you maybe have a fetish because they may well have encountered that attitude from other men here. "
You might not have a fetish OP but other men do. And it's not so much about you (general you, not specific you) liking black women, it's about being desired and seen as more than the colour of my skin. Like some people have a particular thing for fat women - I'm more than my fat and I find that I'm not compatible with people who do fetishize one particular feature of mine while discounting the others.
The way I'm approached matters. I don't want to be told I'm exotic (I'm as exotic as jam roly poly), the person wants to experience their first black woman, asked if black women are really sluts (because yes, that belief exists), so many other things. In threads where black women are dehumanised and spoken about in derogatory terms, it's no surprise some, some black women don't care for it.
Please note, I'm not saying you can have a preference - everyone is entitled to do so.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it ok to just want a pulse still or is that now frowned upon too?? 
FUCKS SAKE! Men and their demands.
"
Fine pulse be optional but still warm at least |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it ok to just want a pulse still or is that now frowned upon too??
FUCKS SAKE! Men and their demands.
Fine pulse be optional but still warm at least"
Ok FINE! You can have a warm body. Happy now? |
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"Is it ok to just want a pulse still or is that now frowned upon too??
FUCKS SAKE! Men and their demands.
Fine pulse be optional but still warm at least
Ok FINE! You can have a warm body. Happy now? "
Just drill a hole in a mannequin, stuff a hot water bottle up its fresh fanny hole and job's a good un.
All he's gotta do is spit on it then it's wet AND warm. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it ok to just want a pulse still or is that now frowned upon too??
FUCKS SAKE! Men and their demands.
Fine pulse be optional but still warm at least
Ok FINE! You can have a warm body. Happy now?
Just drill a hole in a mannequin, stuff a hot water bottle up its fresh fanny hole and job's a good un.
All he's gotta do is spit on it then it's wet AND warm."
genius  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it ok to just want a pulse still or is that now frowned upon too??
FUCKS SAKE! Men and their demands.
Fine pulse be optional but still warm at least
Ok FINE! You can have a warm body. Happy now?
Just drill a hole in a mannequin, stuff a hot water bottle up its fresh fanny hole and job's a good un.
All he's gotta do is spit on it then it's wet AND warm."
Bow to the Queen!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it ok to just want a pulse still or is that now frowned upon too??
FUCKS SAKE! Men and their demands.
Fine pulse be optional but still warm at least
Ok FINE! You can have a warm body. Happy now?
Just drill a hole in a mannequin, stuff a hot water bottle up its fresh fanny hole and job's a good un.
All he's gotta do is spit on it then it's wet AND warm."
Is there a YouTube tutorial for this? Asking for a friend |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Is it ok to just want a pulse still or is that now frowned upon too??
FUCKS SAKE! Men and their demands.
Fine pulse be optional but still warm at least
Ok FINE! You can have a warm body. Happy now?
Just drill a hole in a mannequin, stuff a hot water bottle up its fresh fanny hole and job's a good un.
All he's gotta do is spit on it then it's wet AND warm.
Bow to the Queen! "
Drill bit broke  |
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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago
Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds |
"Evidently im the onky one then lol"
The only people who bang on about "fetishisation" are weirdoes. Finding things attractive is natural and part of the circle of life.
C |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Evidently im the onky one then lol
The only people who bang on about "fetishisation" are weirdoes. Finding things attractive is natural and part of the circle of life.
C"
Right. Good to know.  |
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By *AYENCouple
over a year ago
Lincolnshire |
"I just get weary of people wondering why people are so concerned about other people's sexual preferences.
Im more intrigued as to why it has to be a sexual preference rather than what a person finds attractive.
It is a preference, nobody has to justify it. People just need to crack on and find people within their own preferences. People see different things as attractive. Nobody complains when someone posts an attraction of redheads.
Thats exactly my point. Why is there more of a negative perception of white men who like black women? Why is it automatically put into a fetish box rather than being accepted as thats what they consider to be beautiful. Not beautiful for a black woman. Beautiful, period.
By who? This is literally the first I've heard about it being stigmatised since I was a teen and that was many years ago.
You're a white woman, so I'd be very surprised if you'd experienced this talking to black women on here as a white male lol.
I travel a lot with work too. Sometimes to rural parts of our country and the comments I get when people see my exgfs like "I could never sleep with a black woman" have confused me as I've never felt the need to perceive things in that way. I dont see anyones preference for who they like as anything more than that.
"
How do these village people see your ex girlfriends? Do you keep them in the trunk of your car, or do you keep a swatch of photos with you? |
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This is just a variation on all those other threads claiming people won't meet because of the colour of their skin.
If you look hard enough you'll find evidence to prove every argument and with a few sentences anyone can claim to be a victim of preference. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This is just a variation on all those other threads claiming people won't meet because of the colour of their skin.
If you look hard enough you'll find evidence to prove every argument and with a few sentences anyone can claim to be a victim of preference. "
You've previously said that you've been a victim of preference (not that wording) because you're Irish. I'm a bit bemused at this change of tack? |
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"This is just a variation on all those other threads claiming people won't meet because of the colour of their skin.
If you look hard enough you'll find evidence to prove every argument and with a few sentences anyone can claim to be a victim of preference.
You've previously said that you've been a victim of preference (not that wording) because you're Irish. I'm a bit bemused at this change of tack?"
It's not a change of tack at all. I have been a victim on here of xenophobia and religious bias in real life. Those aren't preferences in my eyes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This is just a variation on all those other threads claiming people won't meet because of the colour of their skin.
If you look hard enough you'll find evidence to prove every argument and with a few sentences anyone can claim to be a victim of preference.
You've previously said that you've been a victim of preference (not that wording) because you're Irish. I'm a bit bemused at this change of tack?
It's not a change of tack at all. I have been a victim on here of xenophobia and religious bias in real life. Those aren't preferences in my eyes. "
But you don't feel race can sometimes be a bias rather than a preference? |
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"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?"
You state that as if it is fact. |
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"This is just a variation on all those other threads claiming people won't meet because of the colour of their skin.
If you look hard enough you'll find evidence to prove every argument and with a few sentences anyone can claim to be a victim of preference.
You've previously said that you've been a victim of preference (not that wording) because you're Irish. I'm a bit bemused at this change of tack?
It's not a change of tack at all. I have been a victim on here of xenophobia and religious bias in real life. Those aren't preferences in my eyes.
But you don't feel race can sometimes be a bias rather than a preference? "
I've never claimed either to be true. I said this is a thread where the op feels his preference is being fetished. My point was that if you are overly sensitive about something it's easy to find offence and if you go looking to be offended you won't have to dig too deep.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"This is just a variation on all those other threads claiming people won't meet because of the colour of their skin.
If you look hard enough you'll find evidence to prove every argument and with a few sentences anyone can claim to be a victim of preference.
You've previously said that you've been a victim of preference (not that wording) because you're Irish. I'm a bit bemused at this change of tack?
It's not a change of tack at all. I have been a victim on here of xenophobia and religious bias in real life. Those aren't preferences in my eyes.
But you don't feel race can sometimes be a bias rather than a preference?
I've never claimed either to be true. I said this is a thread where the op feels his preference is being fetished. My point was that if you are overly sensitive about something it's easy to find offence and if you go looking to be offended you won't have to dig too deep.
"
I will have to examine why I thought you might have a different perspective. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There is racism here. As in real life. And no doubt someone will come along to completely deny this is true. As on every thread about race. I don't blame black women for thinking you maybe have a fetish because they may well have encountered that attitude from other men here.
You might not have a fetish OP but other men do. And it's not so much about you (general you, not specific you) liking black women, it's about being desired and seen as more than the colour of my skin. Like some people have a particular thing for fat women - I'm more than my fat and I find that I'm not compatible with people who do fetishize one particular feature of mine while discounting the others.
The way I'm approached matters. I don't want to be told I'm exotic (I'm as exotic as jam roly poly), the person wants to experience their first black woman, asked if black women are really sluts (because yes, that belief exists), so many other things. In threads where black women are dehumanised and spoken about in derogatory terms, it's no surprise some, some black women don't care for it.
Please note, I'm not saying you can have a preference - everyone is entitled to do so.
"
Oh Meli   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?
No never seen that
There was a thread last week, possibly week before. He got slated but if I recall he worded it in the most dehumanising terms possible.
Then he's a fucking donut and clearly dosent understand the point of this matter. I've grown in a very mixed environment and I dont have black, brown, yellow, straight or gay mates. They're just my mates. Our gen grew different n we don't av much time for the foolishness.
Saying that as I wrote this I've just realised I am on a swing site, so maybe thats why I'm finding more black women challenging me to see if I am fetishising them as evidently there seems to be a lot of white men on here doing so lol
There is racism here. As in real life. And no doubt someone will come along to completely deny this is true. As on every thread about race. I don't blame black women for thinking you maybe have a fetish because they may well have encountered that attitude from other men here. "
 |
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"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?
No never seen that
There was a thread last week, possibly week before. He got slated but if I recall he worded it in the most dehumanising terms possible.
Then he's a fucking donut and clearly dosent understand the point of this matter. I've grown in a very mixed environment and I dont have black, brown, yellow, straight or gay mates. They're just my mates. Our gen grew different n we don't av much time for the foolishness.
Saying that as I wrote this I've just realised I am on a swing site, so maybe thats why I'm finding more black women challenging me to see if I am fetishising them as evidently there seems to be a lot of white men on here doing so lol"
Right so this is comments you're receiving from black women? Honestly having seen the messages a black friend and a mixed race friend receive from white men on here and other sites, I'm not exactly surprised they have walls up about it. Things like how they've "never tried chocolate" asking if they taste different, saying they love the "attitude of sassy black women", calling them exotic, asking what colour their vaginas are... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is a hot potato for sure. I personally don't like to see anyone objectified for the colour of their skin as is often seen on here, though it's dressed as a preference. "
It's good to see others say this. |
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"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?"
Is it?
It's just preference isn't it? |
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By *avie65Man
over a year ago
In the west. |
Personally I can't wait until every one is the same colour, not that I will see it. This will happen some day through procreation and then future generations won't have to put up with this utter bollocks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone else find it strange that its ok for white women to advertise for only liking black men, for black men and women to do the same, but the moment a white man express they onky find black women attractive it automatically is perceived as a fetish rather than an admiration of beauty?
No never seen that
There was a thread last week, possibly week before. He got slated but if I recall he worded it in the most dehumanising terms possible.
Then he's a fucking donut and clearly dosent understand the point of this matter. I've grown in a very mixed environment and I dont have black, brown, yellow, straight or gay mates. They're just my mates. Our gen grew different n we don't av much time for the foolishness.
Saying that as I wrote this I've just realised I am on a swing site, so maybe thats why I'm finding more black women challenging me to see if I am fetishising them as evidently there seems to be a lot of white men on here doing so lol
Right so this is comments you're receiving from black women? Honestly having seen the messages a black friend and a mixed race friend receive from white men on here and other sites, I'm not exactly surprised they have walls up about it. Things like how they've "never tried chocolate" asking if they taste different, saying they love the "attitude of sassy black women", calling them exotic, asking what colour their vaginas are... "
 FFS. How can anyone say that isn't fetishising people.  |
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