FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I nearly did it! I was very nearly a proper Fabber. But disappointment, alas …
I nearly did it! I was very nearly a proper Fabber. But disappointment, alas …
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I’ve been chatting to an attractive (and tall!) young guy, who is in my city this week. We arranged for me to visit him in his apartment tomorrow.
Now, I’m a crap swinger. I live like a fucking nun (not a nun who fucks  ) and haven’t had sex with anyone I haven’t cared for, let alone a total stranger! But a part of me was excited by this new departure from my usual ‘good girl’ self. This is what joining Fab was all about for me. And I couldn’t wait for a good seeing to 
Then he asked me what I’d be looking for. Honest as always, I told him. And then it became clear that oral was his thing, and that there was no point holding out for anything else  I mean, oral is fine, but it will never hit the spot for me like sex does. And that is irrespective of a guy’s skill level.
Man, I’m disappointed, I cannot lie. I know that there are others out there, but a part of me liked the thought of doing this and then not seeing the person again. I wouldn’t have to worry about my performance, my wobbly bits, or ‘catching’ feelings, as they say on here.
Guy was lovely, and of course he’s entitled to his preferences. I just wish it had been apparent from the start. He is still asking to spend time with me this week, but I ain’t in the mood to be sociable.
What has been your biggest Fab disappointment … and do other women on here find that oral is a real fixation for many?
Thanks everyone x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is this guy on something?? Gets the chance to have some hot sex with a very desirable woman and just wants oral??? His loss as you are just fantastic."
Very kind, thank you x |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I’ve not had a Fab disappointment but I do tend to chat to them for months before hand so can scope out their weaknesses first.
Any whiff of preferring oral over penetration then it’s no use. I’m all about the dicking and not the licking.
Most will compromise though. I mean they say they will lick for hours but at most it’s 10 minutes before they start saying their tongue aches. That’s a risk you have to take sometimes. Depends how much you want them I guess.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Seems a shame that all the good chat still hinged on one deal breaking preference, but I guess holding out for exactly what you want will naturally mean it’s less available to you. Will you still message if you’re not up for a social? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’ve not had a Fab disappointment but I do tend to chat to them for months before hand so can scope out their weaknesses first.
Any whiff of preferring oral over penetration then it’s no use. I’m all about the dicking and not the licking.
Most will compromise though. I mean they say they will lick for hours but at most it’s 10 minutes before they start saying their tongue aches. That’s a risk you have to take sometimes. Depends how much you want them I guess.
"
The dicking not the licking  
You can consider that expression well and truly stolen  |
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Oral is a very popular past time on here, the old I can lick for hours pops up very frequently.
In the 3 years of playing with various tounge twisters I have only ever met 1 man who could push my buttons like a artist, so I kept him  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did he want to just give you oral or receive?
Give it to me, I think."
It bores me when a guy just talks about that. Really not into it. In this scenario - is this more for him? Sounds a little like it. Sorry your legs remain closed  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Seems a shame that all the good chat still hinged on one deal breaking preference, but I guess holding out for exactly what you want will naturally mean it’s less available to you. Will you still message if you’re not up for a social?"
Nah, I know what I want, and it wasn’t a cosy chat. This is so not like me! But it’s a bit like going to the sweet shop for strawberry bonbons, only to be told that you can only have liquorice allsorts. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Did he want to just give you oral or receive?
Give it to me, I think.
It bores me when a guy just talks about that. Really not into it. In this scenario - is this more for him? Sounds a little like it. Sorry your legs remain closed "
Thanks It’s honestly just my luck! |
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By *adeiteWoman
over a year ago
Stafford |
So many guys want to spend hours between these thighs, personally I couldn't think of many things worse.
Doesn't do anything for me. After max 5 mins I'm bored.
Can't count the amount of times I've genuinely fallen asleep during. I make it very clear about my thoughts on oral, both ways.
I just don't get the fascination around it.
Used to think I was broken cause I'm not into it, but seems to be a fairly common thing. And we all like what we like. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So many guys want to spend hours between these thighs, personally I couldn't think of many things worse.
Doesn't do anything for me. After max 5 mins I'm bored.
Can't count the amount of times I've genuinely fallen asleep during. I make it very clear about my thoughts on oral, both ways.
I just don't get the fascination around it.
Used to think I was broken cause I'm not into it, but seems to be a fairly common thing. And we all like what we like. "
I’m glad it’s not just me. Although I can’t say I’ve ever fallen asleep during … and I could sleep on a knife edge
I wasn’t even being fussy. Only wanted a good, hard shagging. |
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Get over yourself! There are lots of people that have not found what they want. I've tried to get a social with a couple or lady and don't even get a message back. Boo hoo poor you, didn't get the goods you wanted.
Be grateful that someone met your inflated levels of demand.
You're very attractive and sure you're not short of offers, but don't ask for sympathy when the perfect opportunity didn't end well.
Get over it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Get over yourself! There are lots of people that have not found what they want. I've tried to get a social with a couple or lady and don't even get a message back. Boo hoo poor you, didn't get the goods you wanted.
Be grateful that someone met your inflated levels of demand.
You're very attractive and sure you're not short of offers, but don't ask for sympathy when the perfect opportunity didn't end well.
Get over it"
Inflated levels of demand, my fat arse  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get over yourself! There are lots of people that have not found what they want. I've tried to get a social with a couple or lady and don't even get a message back. Boo hoo poor you, didn't get the goods you wanted.
Be grateful that someone met your inflated levels of demand.
You're very attractive and sure you're not short of offers, but don't ask for sympathy when the perfect opportunity didn't end well.
Get over it"
How nice of you to come on this thread just to have a dig at the OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I plucked up the courage to finally be in a place I was ready to meet guys on my own and had what I think was a wonderful social last week with a view to playing soon and he got some news that he wasn't expecting and slience (which is to he expected under the circumstances) but man was I disappointed I didn't get to get my hands all over him
Danish x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Sorry, but chip on the shoulder responses like that really get on my tits. It’s a bit like saying someone is never entitled to complain, because someone out there will always have it harder!
Or not harder, in my case |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Before you all jump on me, I'm just being honest. I'm sure you want to agree with me, but sit on the fence "
Yeah, sure they all want to agree with you. I’m sorry if past experience has made you bitter, but it ain’t my fault. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So many guys want to spend hours between these thighs, personally I couldn't think of many things worse.
Doesn't do anything for me. After max 5 mins I'm bored.
Can't count the amount of times I've genuinely fallen asleep during. I make it very clear about my thoughts on oral, both ways.
I just don't get the fascination around it.
Used to think I was broken cause I'm not into it, but seems to be a fairly common thing. And we all like what we like.
I’m glad it’s not just me. Although I can’t say I’ve ever fallen asleep during … and I could sleep on a knife edge
I wasn’t even being fussy. Only wanted a good, hard shagging."
You could slap a wet flannel over yourself If you just wanted oral. I am in it for the body on body thrusting too |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I plucked up the courage to finally be in a place I was ready to meet guys on my own and had what I think was a wonderful social last week with a view to playing soon and he got some news that he wasn't expecting and slience (which is to he expected under the circumstances) but man was I disappointed I didn't get to get my hands all over him
Danish x"
Aww, sorry to hear this, and hope you get the chance to hook up again another day x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So many guys want to spend hours between these thighs, personally I couldn't think of many things worse.
Doesn't do anything for me. After max 5 mins I'm bored.
Can't count the amount of times I've genuinely fallen asleep during. I make it very clear about my thoughts on oral, both ways.
I just don't get the fascination around it.
Used to think I was broken cause I'm not into it, but seems to be a fairly common thing. And we all like what we like.
I’m glad it’s not just me. Although I can’t say I’ve ever fallen asleep during … and I could sleep on a knife edge
I wasn’t even being fussy. Only wanted a good, hard shagging.
You could slap a wet flannel over yourself If you just wanted oral. I am in it for the body on body thrusting too "
You and me both! |
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"Before you all jump on me, I'm just being honest. I'm sure you want to agree with me, but sit on the fence
Yeah, sure they all want to agree with you. I’m sorry if past experience has made you bitter, but it ain’t my fault."
I like giving oral. But only as the first part of the time together. It does seem a bit weird, but it's fab xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Before you all jump on me, I'm just being honest. I'm sure you want to agree with me, but sit on the fence "
Just because it’s your honest opinion doesn’t mean it’s not worth jumping on for being shit |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Before you all jump on me, I'm just being honest. I'm sure you want to agree with me, but sit on the fence
Yeah, sure they all want to agree with you. I’m sorry if past experience has made you bitter, but it ain’t my fault.
I like giving oral. But only as the first part of the time together. It does seem a bit weird, but it's fab xx"
True x |
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By *adeiteWoman
over a year ago
Stafford |
"Get over yourself! There are lots of people that have not found what they want. I've tried to get a social with a couple or lady and don't even get a message back. Boo hoo poor you, didn't get the goods you wanted.
Be grateful that someone met your inflated levels of demand.
You're very attractive and sure you're not short of offers, but don't ask for sympathy when the perfect opportunity didn't end well.
Get over it"
I don't think wanting to fuck is an inflated level of demand. Considering there's at least 100 men for every woman on here, with the majority just wanting to fuck.
If you don't have anything nice to say, didn't your mother teach you to just be quiet, but in this case to just keep scrolling  |
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By *avie65Man
over a year ago
In the west. |
"Get over yourself! There are lots of people that have not found what they want. I've tried to get a social with a couple or lady and don't even get a message back. Boo hoo poor you, didn't get the goods you wanted.
Be grateful that someone met your inflated levels of demand.
You're very attractive and sure you're not short of offers, but don't ask for sympathy when the perfect opportunity didn't end well.
Get over it
Inflated levels of demand, my fat arse "
I didn't read the OP's message as having any demands or looking for sympathy. She was asking about dissapointments as she was clearly looking for more that just oral.
I wouldn't say it was the perfect opportunity either, if it had been both of their desires would have been met. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Before you all jump on me, I'm just being honest. I'm sure you want to agree with me, but sit on the fence "
Nope. I think other people just aren't rude. I'm not finding what I want either, but I don't need to have a bash at someone else to make me feel better. |
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"Before you all jump on me, I'm just being honest. I'm sure you want to agree with me, but sit on the fence
Nope. I think other people just aren't rude. I'm not finding what I want either, but I don't need to have a bash at someone else to make me feel better. "
Ah Beryl. The forum is normally such a nice place. Get em told x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oral is a very popular past time on here, the old I can lick for hours pops up very frequently.
In the 3 years of playing with various tounge twisters I have only ever met 1 man who could push my buttons like a artist, so I kept him "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did he offer you oral with sex though?
Doesn't look like it. Oral one way only it seems. Bit odd x"
I only asked because she said oral was his thing, that didn't state no sex |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Before you all jump on me, I'm just being honest. I'm sure you want to agree with me, but sit on the fence
Nope. I think other people just aren't rude. I'm not finding what I want either, but I don't need to have a bash at someone else to make me feel better.
Ah Beryl. The forum is normally such a nice place. Get em told x"
Geraldine, Scotty. Geraldine! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hugs op I am shour the right one will come along
As I was reading I was about to comment go do it have a grate time and let loose till I found the hang up
I get what you mean about the never seeing them again thing
I definitely like one nights for that I can let loose say and do things and then not need to see them again and think to my self ooo god did I read say and do those things i must apologise I feel a bit embarrassed now ha ha
Yes when it comes to one night stands I just go wild as I don’t need to see them again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If a guy just wanted to meet for oral only on him then I wouldn't meet him. That's only doing for him and not giving me any sexual satisfaction for myself. Just saying |
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"Hope he doesn't read the forums.
No, I’d never have posted this if he was on the forums. I am a sensitive soul, honest!  "
It's all a matter of degrees, one-offs can be fun if you are both looking for the same degree of giving pleasure, but if one or the other party cannot articulate their wants, or heaven forbid, one is selfish at the expense of the other, disappointment can result.
At least by clearly discussing what you were both looking for you are saved an uncomfortable evening, as is he.
On a school night too! Tsk. . . . |
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"Before you all jump on me, I'm just being honest. I'm sure you want to agree with me, but sit on the fence
Nope. I think other people just aren't rude. I'm not finding what I want either, but I don't need to have a bash at someone else to make me feel better.
Ah Beryl. The forum is normally such a nice place. Get em told x
Geraldine, Scotty. Geraldine! "
Noted x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Before you all jump on me, I'm just being honest. I'm sure you want to agree with me, but sit on the fence
Nope. I think other people just aren't rude. I'm not finding what I want either, but I don't need to have a bash at someone else to make me feel better.
Ah Beryl. The forum is normally such a nice place. Get em told x
Geraldine, Scotty. Geraldine!
Noted x"
I changed my Fab name to Beryl so now I am getting messages addressed to her.  |
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"Did he offer you oral with sex though?
Doesn't look like it. Oral one way only it seems. Bit odd x
I only asked because she said oral was his thing, that didn't state no sex "
I just don't understand. You get naked, you get busy, and if it's a one off, you both get what you want. Just saying he's giving oral, and wants nothing in return is really odd x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Honestly, I haven’t really had any disappointments.
I’m sure there’s some lady’s I’ve disappointed but hey… I had my fun.
How could you disappoint anyone with such an inviting arse? "
The disappointment begins around two inches further forward… |
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"Honestly, I haven’t really had any disappointments.
I’m sure there’s some lady’s I’ve disappointed but hey… I had my fun.
How could you disappoint anyone with such an inviting arse? "
I thought you were going to go for the pants x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Honestly, I haven’t really had any disappointments.
I’m sure there’s some lady’s I’ve disappointed but hey… I had my fun.
How could you disappoint anyone with such an inviting arse?
The disappointment begins around two inches further forward…"
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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago
Chinese Takeaway near you |
I am just curious (just a genuine question) if everything else had been going so well, was the oral thing really that much a deal breaker? Or maybe subconsciously you got nervous & your fight or flight instinct decided to play safe and just cancel?
Just an observation and genuine question  |
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"Oh and thanks for the pms, offering to help me get over my disappointment
Opportunity knocks for that lad xx
He got 4 big red X's. "
We asked one hundred people if they wanted a meet with Dieu, and one norbert blew it |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"Honestly, I haven’t really had any disappointments.
I’m sure there’s some lady’s I’ve disappointed but hey… I had my fun.
How could you disappoint anyone with such an inviting arse?
The disappointment begins around two inches further forward…"
Your prostate? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Honestly, I haven’t really had any disappointments.
I’m sure there’s some lady’s I’ve disappointed but hey… I had my fun.
How could you disappoint anyone with such an inviting arse?
The disappointment begins around two inches further forward…
Your prostate?"
Bad nanna… you’re really fucking bad! |
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By *avie65Man
over a year ago
In the west. |
"Oh and thanks for the pms, offering to help me get over my disappointment
Opportunity knocks for that lad xx
He got 4 big red X's.
We asked one hundred people if they wanted a meet with Dieu, and one norbert blew it "
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am just curious (just a genuine question) if everything else had been going so well, was the oral thing really that much a deal breaker? Or maybe subconsciously you got nervous & your fight or flight instinct decided to play safe and just cancel?
Just an observation and genuine question "
It’s a very fair question!
I was genuinely disappointed when it didn’t happen. I’m fairly self-aware, and would be able to recognise if I were subconsciously sabotaging something. I would also acknowledge any feelings of relief that there may have been, when it didn’t work out. But there were none, not in this instance anyway!
I am always up for a friendly social, but felt that this wasn’t what I’d signed up for on this occasion. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just goes to show that it's worth chatting properly in the first place xx"
Totally. And to be fair, that is usually me Good communication has always been important to me in the past … and now will be once more! |
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By *rispyDuckMan
over a year ago
Chinese Takeaway near you |
"I am just curious (just a genuine question) if everything else had been going so well, was the oral thing really that much a deal breaker? Or maybe subconsciously you got nervous & your fight or flight instinct decided to play safe and just cancel?
Just an observation and genuine question
It’s a very fair question!
I was genuinely disappointed when it didn’t happen. I’m fairly self-aware, and would be able to recognise if I were subconsciously sabotaging something. I would also acknowledge any feelings of relief that there may have been, when it didn’t work out. But there were none, not in this instance anyway!
I am always up for a friendly social, but felt that this wasn’t what I’d signed up for on this occasion."
Fair enough, sometimes things just don't workout. Wish you best of luck on your next meet venture (whoop whoop lol) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is he married? Or partner sounds very strange he didn't want sex?
I had the exact same thought!  "
Who knows, eh? I’d never knowingly get with anyone married or attached though x |
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By *adyBugsWoman
over a year ago
cognito |
"Is he married? Or partner sounds very strange he didn't want sex?
I had the exact same thought! "
Or maybe doesn’t have confidence in the penis department? I knew a guy once who would prefer oral to penetration because he didn’t feel confident about his bits n pieces. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am just curious (just a genuine question) if everything else had been going so well, was the oral thing really that much a deal breaker? Or maybe subconsciously you got nervous & your fight or flight instinct decided to play safe and just cancel?
Just an observation and genuine question
It’s a very fair question!
I was genuinely disappointed when it didn’t happen. I’m fairly self-aware, and would be able to recognise if I were subconsciously sabotaging something. I would also acknowledge any feelings of relief that there may have been, when it didn’t work out. But there were none, not in this instance anyway!
I am always up for a friendly social, but felt that this wasn’t what I’d signed up for on this occasion.
Fair enough, sometimes things just don't workout. Wish you best of luck on your next meet venture (whoop whoop lol) "
Thanks and best of luck to you too!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’ve been chatting to an attractive (and tall!) young guy, who is in my city this week. We arranged for me to visit him in his apartment tomorrow.
Now, I’m a crap swinger. I live like a fucking nun (not a nun who fucks ) and haven’t had sex with anyone I haven’t cared for, let alone a total stranger! But a part of me was excited by this new departure from my usual ‘good girl’ self. This is what joining Fab was all about for me. And I couldn’t wait for a good seeing to
Then he asked me what I’d be looking for. Honest as always, I told him. And then it became clear that oral was his thing, and that there was no point holding out for anything else I mean, oral is fine, but it will never hit the spot for me like sex does. And that is irrespective of a guy’s skill level.
Man, I’m disappointed, I cannot lie. I know that there are others out there, but a part of me liked the thought of doing this and then not seeing the person again. I wouldn’t have to worry about my performance, my wobbly bits, or ‘catching’ feelings, as they say on here.
Guy was lovely, and of course he’s entitled to his preferences. I just wish it had been apparent from the start. He is still asking to spend time with me this week, but I ain’t in the mood to be sociable.
What has been your biggest Fab disappointment … and do other women on here find that oral is a real fixation for many?
Thanks everyone x"
We are confused your veri's say 4 meets by 2 men did nothing happen at these meets ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Trust me, there'll be a lot of long, dark nights of the soul when you finally do go through with it. You might regret trading in your virtue "
Ha ha, we’ll see! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If a guy just wanted to meet for oral only on him then I wouldn't meet him. That's only doing for him and not giving me any sexual satisfaction for myself. Just saying "
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