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"Yes and I know my biggest flaw is my grateist asset I am to kind and helping for my own good " Do you put others before yourself? | |||
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"Totally aware and it's even on my profile so it doesn't come as a shock to others. As for what I'd do to fix it, it requires major surgery and about £30,000 But for now, I'm living and coping with it as best I can" I’m sorry to hear that . I’m talking about in terms of thought processes though. | |||
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"Totally aware and it's even on my profile so it doesn't come as a shock to others. As for what I'd do to fix it, it requires major surgery and about £30,000 But for now, I'm living and coping with it as best I can I’m sorry to hear that . I’m talking about in terms of thought processes though. " Oh this does affect me mentally. A lot. My confidence is not there when it comes to intimacy, or going to clubs, the beach, swimming etc.. But, I am trying to be confident in other areas by being sociable and friendly. Also, try not to care what others think of me if in a negative sense | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development?" I’m not aware of any flaws in my blindspot, but I try to be conscious of those flaws and triggers I am aware of. I don’t journal, but I do a lot of self reflection to help me grow as a person. | |||
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"I know my flaws and my triggers. They are hard to keep in check but an understanding person is the best person to have by your side. I'm often being given a slap and being told to snap out of it " Is snapping out of it the solution though? | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development?" I'm very much self deprecating. Too much according to some. Journal, no. Open to change? I'm a bloke, we aren't wired that way. Development, in the last couple of years I've definitely opened my eyes to new things. | |||
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"I think we all have aspects of ourselves that require maintenance, I’m short tempered in certain environments and I want to run before I can walk when it comes to learning new skills, I practice yoga and mindfulness to address these. Music is my escapism and after a hard day or when I feel myself a little off balance I plug in my ear pods and take a long walk in the countryside, it helps me gain clarity and clears my occasional busy mind. Failing that I go to my dance studio and just get lost in movement, I find it a therapeutic outlay for my emotions, it makes me feel weightless and free xx" Movement for releasing emotions is a very undervalued process | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? I’m not aware of any flaws in my blindspot, but I try to be conscious of those flaws and triggers I am aware of. I don’t journal, but I do a lot of self reflection to help me grow as a person." Is your self reflection like journaling, but just in your mind? | |||
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"Totally aware and it's even on my profile so it doesn't come as a shock to others. As for what I'd do to fix it, it requires major surgery and about £30,000 But for now, I'm living and coping with it as best I can I’m sorry to hear that . I’m talking about in terms of thought processes though. Oh this does affect me mentally. A lot. My confidence is not there when it comes to intimacy, or going to clubs, the beach, swimming etc.. But, I am trying to be confident in other areas by being sociable and friendly. Also, try not to care what others think of me if in a negative sense" That must be really hard | |||
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"Nothing has triggered me in years. I would get wound up over stupid things and it isn’t good for your health. Now I am completely different and feel much better for it " What’s your secret ? | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? I'm very much self deprecating. Too much according to some. Journal, no. Open to change? I'm a bloke, we aren't wired that way. Development, in the last couple of years I've definitely opened my eyes to new things. " Isn’t changing and developing the same thing? | |||
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"I have a perception of myself. It's honest because it's how I honestly perceive myself but I'm under no illusions that my honest perception of myself might not match how others see me. We all have our own biases. I'm aware of my flaws, possibly verging on being too critical on them but I'm a work in progress. I more often than not know the root of my triggers but sometimes they've been triggered because the person is a throbber and I don't feel the need to examine that too deeply. I'm open to developing myself and change to a certain degree. Work in progress really." I’m curious about being triggered bu a throbber (idiot?). Does this make examining the trigger less valuable? | |||
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"Yes and I know my biggest flaw is my grateist asset I am to kind and helping for my own good Do you put others before yourself? " Yes all the time | |||
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"Eek! I’d say I’m self-aware. I don’t journal though, as I’m the least self-disciplined person going. And tend to avoid that which has a sense of obligation attached. " I agree, that we shouldn’t feel obligated. | |||
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"I am very much aware of my flaws and insecurities, and I do have my own ways of dealing with them...but it is difficult at times, anxiety is always there in the back, creeping up. I rarely admit it, but there are days I say some horrible things to myself" What’s the value in being horrible to yourself? Would you say those things to a friend? | |||
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"Yes and I know my biggest flaw is my grateist asset I am to kind and helping for my own good Do you put others before yourself? Yes all the time " I read somewhere, it’s better to disappoint others, than yourself. You can pour form an empty cup, lovely | |||
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"I certainly try to be. I do reflect on what's happened, how I reacted and whether j could react differently. It's a long process. I don't know all my triggers yet - perhaps this is the same with others who have experienced toxic relationships. " It’s a work in progress for sure, but worth it. | |||
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"Yes and I know my biggest flaw is my grateist asset I am to kind and helping for my own good Do you put others before yourself? Yes all the time I read somewhere, it’s better to disappoint others, than yourself. You can pour form an empty cup, lovely " Awww thank you so much | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? I'm very much self deprecating. Too much according to some. Journal, no. Open to change? I'm a bloke, we aren't wired that way. Development, in the last couple of years I've definitely opened my eyes to new things. Isn’t changing and developing the same thing?" Yes and no. I see change as something totally different to my normal/routine. Development is making small adjustments, improvements maybe. It also depends on whether I've made the choice or if someone has pointed out an area that could be changed | |||
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"Yes and I know my biggest flaw is my grateist asset I am to kind and helping for my own good Do you put others before yourself? Yes all the time I read somewhere, it’s better to disappoint others, than yourself. You can pour form an empty cup, lovely Awww thank you so much " That should say, you can’t pour from an empty cup. You are always lovely, but you need to be as lovely to yourself | |||
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"Like to think I am aware! And try to not react to the triggers! Sometimes very difficult! Especially when it involves loved ones! Or Sometimes complete strangers! I get angry at injustice! And tell myself not to get involved but find it difficult not to! Generally I'm a laid back open person though x" | |||
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"Nothing has triggered me in years. I would get wound up over stupid things and it isn’t good for your health. Now I am completely different and feel much better for it What’s your secret ?" Just a different outlook on life. There are positives in everything, we just need to find them. | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? I'm very much self deprecating. Too much according to some. Journal, no. Open to change? I'm a bloke, we aren't wired that way. Development, in the last couple of years I've definitely opened my eyes to new things. Isn’t changing and developing the same thing? Yes and no. I see change as something totally different to my normal/routine. Development is making small adjustments, improvements maybe. It also depends on whether I've made the choice or if someone has pointed out an area that could be changed " Perfect answer . We don’t need to change, sometimes thought processes need changing, but not us. | |||
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"Be kind to yourself. What do you do to support yourself. You are very important. Only you know what's truly going on inside you. " Kindness to yourself is vital . | |||
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"Nothing has triggered me in years. I would get wound up over stupid things and it isn’t good for your health. Now I am completely different and feel much better for it What’s your secret ? Just a different outlook on life. There are positives in everything, we just need to find them. " Love this | |||
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"Yes and I know my biggest flaw is my grateist asset I am to kind and helping for my own good Do you put others before yourself? Yes all the time I read somewhere, it’s better to disappoint others, than yourself. You can pour form an empty cup, lovely Awww thank you so much That should say, you can’t pour from an empty cup. You are always lovely, but you need to be as lovely to yourself " Yes I think I do need to start being | |||
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"I’m curious about being triggered bu a throbber (idiot?). Does this make examining the trigger less valuable?" Yes, most of the time. I don't want to devote my time and emotional energy to examining certain things. It's enough that I've recognised my feeling, dealt with it and moved on. That's me putting myself first and what works best for me, I'm too prone to overthinking anyway so don't want to unnecessarily facilitate it when it won't serve me. | |||
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"I’m curious about being triggered bu a throbber (idiot?). Does this make examining the trigger less valuable? Yes, most of the time. I don't want to devote my time and emotional energy to examining certain things. It's enough that I've recognised my feeling, dealt with it and moved on. That's me putting myself first and what works best for me, I'm too prone to overthinking anyway so don't want to unnecessarily facilitate it when it won't serve me. " I think recognising what has been brought up is valuable in itself. | |||
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"I’m curious about being triggered bu a throbber (idiot?). Does this make examining the trigger less valuable? Yes, most of the time. I don't want to devote my time and emotional energy to examining certain things. It's enough that I've recognised my feeling, dealt with it and moved on. That's me putting myself first and what works best for me, I'm too prone to overthinking anyway so don't want to unnecessarily facilitate it when it won't serve me. I think recognising what has been brought up is valuable in itself." I'm glad we agree. | |||
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"I am very much aware of my flaws and insecurities, and I do have my own ways of dealing with them...but it is difficult at times, anxiety is always there in the back, creeping up. I rarely admit it, but there are days I say some horrible things to myself What’s the value in being horrible to yourself? Would you say those things to a friend? " There is no value...and no I wouldn't say those things to anyone else...and I understand what you are trying to say, but if you think it's that easy (just acknowledge it and it goes away), you don't understand anxiety...it's like a demon that's always there and you try to control it as much as you can, it never goes away. In comparison to other people that suffer with anxiety, who can be very impulsive and explosive and aggressive, I do poses enough self control and discipline (and the necessary ambition to constantly strengthen these attributes), which I am very proud of, but it never goes away. I do reflect on the nasty words I sometimes say to myself, that's how I come to be able to talk about it, and in the rare moments I do open and talk about it, I am not looking for advice...I just hope people listen | |||
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"Yes and I know my biggest flaw is my grateist asset I am to kind and helping for my own good Do you put others before yourself? " I do and that is my downfall | |||
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"I’m curious about being triggered bu a throbber (idiot?). Does this make examining the trigger less valuable? Yes, most of the time. I don't want to devote my time and emotional energy to examining certain things. It's enough that I've recognised my feeling, dealt with it and moved on. That's me putting myself first and what works best for me, I'm too prone to overthinking anyway so don't want to unnecessarily facilitate it when it won't serve me. I think recognising what has been brought up is valuable in itself. I'm glad we agree. " Well we have to sometimes | |||
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"I am very much aware of my flaws and insecurities, and I do have my own ways of dealing with them...but it is difficult at times, anxiety is always there in the back, creeping up. I rarely admit it, but there are days I say some horrible things to myself What’s the value in being horrible to yourself? Would you say those things to a friend? There is no value...and no I wouldn't say those things to anyone else...and I understand what you are trying to say, but if you think it's that easy (just acknowledge it and it goes away), you don't understand anxiety...it's like a demon that's always there and you try to control it as much as you can, it never goes away. In comparison to other people that suffer with anxiety, who can be very impulsive and explosive and aggressive, I do poses enough self control and discipline (and the necessary ambition to constantly strengthen these attributes), which I am very proud of, but it never goes away. I do reflect on the nasty words I sometimes say to myself, that's how I come to be able to talk about it, and in the rare moments I do open and talk about it, I am not looking for advice...I just hope people listen" I do understand, really I do. | |||
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"Yes and I know my biggest flaw is my grateist asset I am to kind and helping for my own good Do you put others before yourself? I do and that is my downfall" You can’t pour from an empty cup | |||
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"Probably not. I don't know how you know whether you're self aware of not" For me, I guess when I examine things that trigger me, look at my thought processes, my awareness around how I may land with others etc… | |||
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"To a fault " Is that a positive? | |||
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"Ridiculously stubborn. Not sure it can be changed though " Do you want to change it? | |||
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"I'd say I am. I'm acutely aware of my limitations and triggers as an introvert. I catch my thoughts all the time especially if I'm about to comment on something. When you act as an expert illegal proceedings you have to be aware of all points of view and the difference between fact an opinion. " | |||
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"Do I know most of my triggers and how the effect me? Yeah in the main, I'm quite predicable to be honest, been the same since my teens. There are pros and cons though to it as there is with much in life. There is a balance to be had I think which can be difficult to achieve. " I agree, to not have so much self examination that you aren’t living life. | |||
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"Probably not. I don't know how you know whether you're self aware of not For me, I guess when I examine things that trigger me, look at my thought processes, my awareness around how I may land with others etc…" Ok. I do that to a degree but does there come a point where you question the validity of your thought process? Is the awareness of my self that I have the same as other people's awareness of me and is that even important? | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? I'm very much self deprecating. Too much according to some. Journal, no. Open to change? I'm a bloke, we aren't wired that way. Development, in the last couple of years I've definitely opened my eyes to new things. Isn’t changing and developing the same thing? Yes and no. I see change as something totally different to my normal/routine. Development is making small adjustments, improvements maybe. It also depends on whether I've made the choice or if someone has pointed out an area that could be changed Perfect answer . We don’t need to change, sometimes thought processes need changing, but not us." Exactly. I'm perfectly happy in myself, I don't feel the need to strive to improve. I'm not saying I'm perfect, I know I'm not. I'm just comfortable and comfortable is good. I spent years wondering if I was good enough when I should have been worried about happy enough | |||
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"To a fault Is that a positive?" I suppose it’s more positive now than it used to be. I found myself losing the plot at work far too often and had to start looking for the reasons why before I was sacked, I’ve now narrowed it down to my head wanting to do a weeks work in an hour which led to anxiety induced outbursts of rage. I narrowed it further down to me eating chocolate the night before does something to me the next day. Each night I kept off chocolate I was fine and just got on with things. Overthinking much? | |||
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"Probably not. I don't know how you know whether you're self aware of not For me, I guess when I examine things that trigger me, look at my thought processes, my awareness around how I may land with others etc… Ok. I do that to a degree but does there come a point where you question the validity of your thought process? Is the awareness of my self that I have the same as other people's awareness of me and is that even important?" Ooh, good questions! One to ponder for me | |||
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"My biggest flaw is my anger. I’m not violent or anything I just don’t have a lot of patience for things/people that annoy me and I can be really snappy if my mood isn’t right. I’ve worked very hard on this over the years and I’ve improved a lot. I found going to the gym has helped me release a lot of anger and also improves my mood but I still have my moments." But you’re aware of it, so that’s a positive. | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? I'm very much self deprecating. Too much according to some. Journal, no. Open to change? I'm a bloke, we aren't wired that way. Development, in the last couple of years I've definitely opened my eyes to new things. Isn’t changing and developing the same thing? Yes and no. I see change as something totally different to my normal/routine. Development is making small adjustments, improvements maybe. It also depends on whether I've made the choice or if someone has pointed out an area that could be changed Perfect answer . We don’t need to change, sometimes thought processes need changing, but not us. Exactly. I'm perfectly happy in myself, I don't feel the need to strive to improve. I'm not saying I'm perfect, I know I'm not. I'm just comfortable and comfortable is good. I spent years wondering if I was good enough when I should have been worried about happy enough" | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development?" God yes . The last 18 months or so I've learned way more about myself than the previous 46 odd years haha.. I've kinda found my niche , my preferred lifestyle , my social life has improved hugely , and for the first time in around 20 years I'm living life the way I want not what others deem fit for me | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? I'm very much self deprecating. Too much according to some. Journal, no. Open to change? I'm a bloke, we aren't wired that way. Development, in the last couple of years I've definitely opened my eyes to new things. Isn’t changing and developing the same thing? Yes and no. I see change as something totally different to my normal/routine. Development is making small adjustments, improvements maybe. It also depends on whether I've made the choice or if someone has pointed out an area that could be changed Perfect answer . We don’t need to change, sometimes thought processes need changing, but not us. Exactly. I'm perfectly happy in myself, I don't feel the need to strive to improve. I'm not saying I'm perfect, I know I'm not. I'm just comfortable and comfortable is good. I spent years wondering if I was good enough when I should have been worried about happy enough" | |||
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"Ridiculously stubborn. Not sure it can be changed though " i don’t know. I think maybe it protects me. I’m not even sure stubborn is the right word. | |||
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"To a fault Is that a positive? I suppose it’s more positive now than it used to be. I found myself losing the plot at work far too often and had to start looking for the reasons why before I was sacked, I’ve now narrowed it down to my head wanting to do a weeks work in an hour which led to anxiety induced outbursts of rage. I narrowed it further down to me eating chocolate the night before does something to me the next day. Each night I kept off chocolate I was fine and just got on with things. Overthinking much? " | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? God yes . The last 18 months or so I've learned way more about myself than the previous 46 odd years haha.. I've kinda found my niche , my preferred lifestyle , my social life has improved hugely , and for the first time in around 20 years I'm living life the way I want not what others deem fit for me " That’s great | |||
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"Ridiculously stubborn. Not sure it can be changed though i don’t know. I think maybe it protects me. I’m not even sure stubborn is the right word. " Protective? | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? I'm very much self deprecating. Too much according to some. Journal, no. Open to change? I'm a bloke, we aren't wired that way. Development, in the last couple of years I've definitely opened my eyes to new things. Isn’t changing and developing the same thing? Yes and no. I see change as something totally different to my normal/routine. Development is making small adjustments, improvements maybe. It also depends on whether I've made the choice or if someone has pointed out an area that could be changed Perfect answer . We don’t need to change, sometimes thought processes need changing, but not us. Exactly. I'm perfectly happy in myself, I don't feel the need to strive to improve. I'm not saying I'm perfect, I know I'm not. I'm just comfortable and comfortable is good. I spent years wondering if I was good enough when I should have been worried about happy enough" I like this. | |||
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"Ridiculously stubborn. Not sure it can be changed though i don’t know. I think maybe it protects me. I’m not even sure stubborn is the right word. Protective?" Over myself I think yeah | |||
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"My biggest flaw is my anger. I’m not violent or anything I just don’t have a lot of patience for things/people that annoy me and I can be really snappy if my mood isn’t right. I’ve worked very hard on this over the years and I’ve improved a lot. I found going to the gym has helped me release a lot of anger and also improves my mood but I still have my moments. But you’re aware of it, so that’s a positive." Yeah usually if I’m arguing or being snappy with someone I’m quick to realise it’s probably me being unreasonable or overreacting and I can take myself away from the situation. I also think my wife has helped me with it because she’s so laid back and she has a way of just calming me instantly | |||
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"Ridiculously stubborn. Not sure it can be changed though i don’t know. I think maybe it protects me. I’m not even sure stubborn is the right word. Protective? Over myself I think yeah " Does it bother you? | |||
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"My biggest flaw is my anger. I’m not violent or anything I just don’t have a lot of patience for things/people that annoy me and I can be really snappy if my mood isn’t right. I’ve worked very hard on this over the years and I’ve improved a lot. I found going to the gym has helped me release a lot of anger and also improves my mood but I still have my moments. But you’re aware of it, so that’s a positive. Yeah usually if I’m arguing or being snappy with someone I’m quick to realise it’s probably me being unreasonable or overreacting and I can take myself away from the situation. I also think my wife has helped me with it because she’s so laid back and she has a way of just calming me instantly " (or tell some Dad jokes ) | |||
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"My biggest flaw is my anger. I’m not violent or anything I just don’t have a lot of patience for things/people that annoy me and I can be really snappy if my mood isn’t right. I’ve worked very hard on this over the years and I’ve improved a lot. I found going to the gym has helped me release a lot of anger and also improves my mood but I still have my moments. But you’re aware of it, so that’s a positive. Yeah usually if I’m arguing or being snappy with someone I’m quick to realise it’s probably me being unreasonable or overreacting and I can take myself away from the situation. I also think my wife has helped me with it because she’s so laid back and she has a way of just calming me instantly (or tell some Dad jokes )" I’ve got a couple ready for the next thread | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? God yes . The last 18 months or so I've learned way more about myself than the previous 46 odd years haha.. I've kinda found my niche , my preferred lifestyle , my social life has improved hugely , and for the first time in around 20 years I'm living life the way I want not what others deem fit for me That’s great " Thankyou xx | |||
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"I am self aware but I've never journaled or anything along those lines. For the first 40 years I wasn't self aware and did everything without question. Then illness caused me to take stock and realise I had only been coping up to that point. That was followed by 9 years of looking for ways to change and develop but it was like banging my head against a wall and all to no avail. Just before turning 50 a number of things happened that will remain private but it was like shining a spotlight on my strengths and weaknesses. I now know what my triggers are and I embrace them and have no intention of changing them or hiding from them. " That sounds harsh, but ultimately good? | |||
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"My biggest flaw is my anger. I’m not violent or anything I just don’t have a lot of patience for things/people that annoy me and I can be really snappy if my mood isn’t right. I’ve worked very hard on this over the years and I’ve improved a lot. I found going to the gym has helped me release a lot of anger and also improves my mood but I still have my moments. But you’re aware of it, so that’s a positive. Yeah usually if I’m arguing or being snappy with someone I’m quick to realise it’s probably me being unreasonable or overreacting and I can take myself away from the situation. I also think my wife has helped me with it because she’s so laid back and she has a way of just calming me instantly (or tell some Dad jokes ) I’ve got a couple ready for the next thread " Yay | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? God yes . The last 18 months or so I've learned way more about myself than the previous 46 odd years haha.. I've kinda found my niche , my preferred lifestyle , my social life has improved hugely , and for the first time in around 20 years I'm living life the way I want not what others deem fit for me That’s great Thankyou xx" | |||
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"I certainly try to be. I do reflect on what's happened, how I reacted and whether j could react differently. It's a long process. I don't know all my triggers yet - perhaps this is the same with others who have experienced toxic relationships. It’s a work in progress for sure, but worth it." Very much for me too. I'd like to stop being so horrible to myself and about myself, I'm trying hard to counter that. | |||
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"I certainly try to be. I do reflect on what's happened, how I reacted and whether j could react differently. It's a long process. I don't know all my triggers yet - perhaps this is the same with others who have experienced toxic relationships. It’s a work in progress for sure, but worth it. Very much for me too. I'd like to stop being so horrible to myself and about myself, I'm trying hard to counter that. " Yes, it’s tough, but every little step helps | |||
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"I’m aware that I can be a dickhead sometimes. I’m also aware that I don’t care. I guess that counts." So self awareness around yourself, but now how you might land on others. | |||
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"I've actually become more stubborn the older I've got and I say "no" more often. Think it's because my mum always expected me to be available for her 24/7 as I grew up. So probably a flaw to some people but not to me. It's assertive x" The ability to say no is absolutely not a bad thing. | |||
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"More so than I was, I used to be an arrogant prick, I try to be better to myself and others now, is a work in progress" | |||
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"I've actually become more stubborn the older I've got and I say "no" more often. Think it's because my mum always expected me to be available for her 24/7 as I grew up. So probably a flaw to some people but not to me. It's assertive x The ability to say no is absolutely not a bad thing. " Absolutely and it feels good saying it | |||
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"I've actually become more stubborn the older I've got and I say "no" more often. Think it's because my mum always expected me to be available for her 24/7 as I grew up. So probably a flaw to some people but not to me. It's assertive x The ability to say no is absolutely not a bad thing. Absolutely and it feels good saying it " It’s important to be kind to yourself , and that’s part of it. | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development?" Yes, I’m sure I have some exhibitionist and narcissistic tendencies and I veer from supreme confidence in my looks and personality to doubt. Being truthful I’ve for a long time needed some validation from others and it’s probably a factor in me now being part of this lifestyle. That said, being here has been a breath of fresh air for me, I feel more attractive and desired than I have for a very long time. All the above said I’m a deeply caring person and I’m usually aware of my own ridiculousness and I would always put others happiness above my own. | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? Yes, I’m sure I have some exhibitionist and narcissistic tendencies and I veer from supreme confidence in my looks and personality to doubt. Being truthful I’ve for a long time needed some validation from others and it’s probably a factor in me now being part of this lifestyle. That said, being here has been a breath of fresh air for me, I feel more attractive and desired than I have for a very long time. All the above said I’m a deeply caring person and I’m usually aware of my own ridiculousness and I would always put others happiness above my own." I think most who consider whether or not they are narcissistic, tend not to be. It’s good to have confidence in yourself | |||
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"Reading you OP, no, I guess I am not!" Is that ok for you? It’s not a criticism of those who aren’t | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? Yes, I’m sure I have some exhibitionist and narcissistic tendencies and I veer from supreme confidence in my looks and personality to doubt. Being truthful I’ve for a long time needed some validation from others and it’s probably a factor in me now being part of this lifestyle. That said, being here has been a breath of fresh air for me, I feel more attractive and desired than I have for a very long time. All the above said I’m a deeply caring person and I’m usually aware of my own ridiculousness and I would always put others happiness above my own. I think most who consider whether or not they are narcissistic, tend not to be. It’s good to have confidence in yourself " Interesting because that’s what professional told me and yet I have a view of myself as being somewhat vain, self absorbed and self important at times. Sorry I’m being very open with my flaws here!! I will reiterate though I do profoundly care for others and not just those closest to me so perhaps I can’t be that much of a narcissist… | |||
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"Aww definitely I have a few areas I can definitely lose myself, need to be careful but thankfully know when I need to use my tools, tips off load to trusted friends, gym exercise outdoors and reading " | |||
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"The older I get, the more I recognise my strengths and weaknesses. I learned in my late 40s that the reason I always felt somewhat detached from the larger part of those around me, but still formed incredibly close bonds with a handful of people, was that I was autistic. Finding that out unlocked a whole realisation for me to explain how, and why, I’d always felt out of step. It also explained where my strengths come from, and why I can do some things without effort that most people simply can’t. I’ve been privileged, a couple of times, to have had close working relationships with small teams, where our mutual strengths augment each other, and our weaknesses cancel out. Finding a fit like that is priceless, because it not only highlighted my value in the team, it also showed me just how much better others were at some things than I was. It helped me improve in those areas, and it also showed me where my limits were and when it would be best to defer to one of the others, because their skill set eclipsed mine in those instances. Success in my current role is almost entirely attributable to my being autistic. Recognising that has been great for my peace of mind. " That’s lovely | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? Yes, I’m sure I have some exhibitionist and narcissistic tendencies and I veer from supreme confidence in my looks and personality to doubt. Being truthful I’ve for a long time needed some validation from others and it’s probably a factor in me now being part of this lifestyle. That said, being here has been a breath of fresh air for me, I feel more attractive and desired than I have for a very long time. All the above said I’m a deeply caring person and I’m usually aware of my own ridiculousness and I would always put others happiness above my own. I think most who consider whether or not they are narcissistic, tend not to be. It’s good to have confidence in yourself Interesting because that’s what professional told me and yet I have a view of myself as being somewhat vain, self absorbed and self important at times. Sorry I’m being very open with my flaws here!! I will reiterate though I do profoundly care for others and not just those closest to me so perhaps I can’t be that much of a narcissist…" It sounds like you are quite self aware, and maybe a little critical of yourself? | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? Yes, I’m sure I have some exhibitionist and narcissistic tendencies and I veer from supreme confidence in my looks and personality to doubt. Being truthful I’ve for a long time needed some validation from others and it’s probably a factor in me now being part of this lifestyle. That said, being here has been a breath of fresh air for me, I feel more attractive and desired than I have for a very long time. All the above said I’m a deeply caring person and I’m usually aware of my own ridiculousness and I would always put others happiness above my own. I think most who consider whether or not they are narcissistic, tend not to be. It’s good to have confidence in yourself Interesting because that’s what professional told me and yet I have a view of myself as being somewhat vain, self absorbed and self important at times. Sorry I’m being very open with my flaws here!! I will reiterate though I do profoundly care for others and not just those closest to me so perhaps I can’t be that much of a narcissist… It sounds like you are quite self aware, and maybe a little critical of yourself?" Always. Going through a divorce at the moment and while nothing is black and white I have absorbed a lot of the responsibility for our marriage failing. That’s despite there being no specific reason for the break down. I’m not down or depressed but certainly reflective at this point. The positive I take is that self awareness hopefully will make me a better, gentler partner going forward: | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development?" Yes i am aware and try my best to recognise when my flaws are rearing their ugly head so I can jump on them. I try to be honest and objective about who I am but I have learnt as much about myself from others as I have myself. Sometimes I'm surprised by how other perceive my actions so this also helps me understand more about myself as well. I have always been open to self development and try to understand why I act certain ways. I try not to think too much about the cause of certain triggers as then I feel like I am justifying them. I instead work on recognising when I am being triggered and find ways to change. What about you op? Some beautiful questions that I would like to hear your point of view on | |||
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"Yes and I know my biggest flaw is my grateist asset I am to kind and helping for my own good " You can never be too kind or helping. If people take advantage of it, shame on them not you | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? Yes, I’m sure I have some exhibitionist and narcissistic tendencies and I veer from supreme confidence in my looks and personality to doubt. Being truthful I’ve for a long time needed some validation from others and it’s probably a factor in me now being part of this lifestyle. That said, being here has been a breath of fresh air for me, I feel more attractive and desired than I have for a very long time. All the above said I’m a deeply caring person and I’m usually aware of my own ridiculousness and I would always put others happiness above my own. I think most who consider whether or not they are narcissistic, tend not to be. It’s good to have confidence in yourself Interesting because that’s what professional told me and yet I have a view of myself as being somewhat vain, self absorbed and self important at times. Sorry I’m being very open with my flaws here!! I will reiterate though I do profoundly care for others and not just those closest to me so perhaps I can’t be that much of a narcissist… It sounds like you are quite self aware, and maybe a little critical of yourself? Always. Going through a divorce at the moment and while nothing is black and white I have absorbed a lot of the responsibility for our marriage failing. That’s despite there being no specific reason for the break down. I’m not down or depressed but certainly reflective at this point. The positive I take is that self awareness hopefully will make me a better, gentler partner going forward:" . Be gentle with yourself. | |||
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"I think we all have aspects of ourselves that require maintenance, I’m short tempered in certain environments and I want to run before I can walk when it comes to learning new skills, I practice yoga and mindfulness to address these. Music is my escapism and after a hard day or when I feel myself a little off balance I plug in my ear pods and take a long walk in the countryside, it helps me gain clarity and clears my occasional busy mind. Failing that I go to my dance studio and just get lost in movement, I find it a therapeutic outlay for my emotions, it makes me feel weightless and free xx" It's funny what people use as meditation. I've always been the same and find sports and music as great ways to get in the moment. | |||
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" I have always been open to self development and try to understand why I act certain ways. I try not to think too much about the cause of certain triggers as then I feel like I am justifying them. I instead work on recognising when I am being triggered and find ways to change. What about you op? Some beautiful questions that I would like to hear your point of view on " Similar to you, I’m very open to self development, I don’t always journal but find it can be a useful tool at times. I’ve got into a habit of examining what arises when I’m triggered now. Sometimes I can identify what comes up fairly quickly, and sometimes it takes longer, but it’s allowed me to come from compassion and the heart a lot more. | |||
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"I have loads of flaws. I've learnt that if you to try to change to please someone, you can never stop. Be yourself and be with people who like your flaws. X" Absolutely. You should never change for someone. They are called flaws, but they aren’t really, they are just us. It’s not about changing that. It’s about observing thoughts? | |||
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"I am fairly self aware but don't journal....I am interested in starting but not sure what to write and I'm terrible at being consistent! I think I need structure in what to write hehe " You write whatever flows, whatever you choose, whatever you feel and whenever you feel? | |||
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"I meditate instead " | |||
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"I'm aware of my flaws but don't think I'm aware of my triggers as I feel they vary depending on my mood. Certain things may set me off one day whereas they wouldn't another. I'm generally good at finding the crux of the issue though but probably need to work on either avoiding them or how to manage it better when it does happen." Do you avoid them, rather than examine them? | |||
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"I don’t really understand any of what’s been said here. I rely on bumbling my way through day to day life. Shit that used to bug me, now doesn’t, I don’t really know why. I don’t allow myself to be wound up by stuff, I don’t know why. I solve problems that get put in front of me, as they arise. " Sounds like it works for you | |||
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"I'm aware of my flaws but don't think I'm aware of my triggers as I feel they vary depending on my mood. Certain things may set me off one day whereas they wouldn't another. I'm generally good at finding the crux of the issue though but probably need to work on either avoiding them or how to manage it better when it does happen. Do you avoid them, rather than examine them?" Depends on if my flaws hurt anyone. If they do, then try to examine and sort ot, if it only hurts myself, try to avoid to prevent. For example, I can get irritable if people do or say things in a way I think is wrong, to not get irritated is manageable. If things don't turn out a certain way, I can overthink it even though it's gone, I can avoid that. Hope that makes a little bit of sense haha | |||
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"I’ve got a bit behind . This posting about your flaws, don’t beat yourself up. We all have them, and it’s only human. The purpose of this thread was not for you to highlight your flaws, but to ask if you are aware of them, and if you examine them, along with your triggers? " Hippy. You look fantastic. Don't let the demons get to you x | |||
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"Reading you OP, no, I guess I am not! Is that ok for you? It’s not a criticism of those who aren’t " I know I am a work in progress, aren't we all? As for triggers, I think I may be too dense to understand exactly. I don't journal but I do reflect. I dont plan much. Maybe I should? Food for thought, this thread x | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development?" Let me put it this way, Ms Hippychick. The Talking Head 9000 series is the most reliable swinger ever made. No Talking Head 9000 swinger has ever made a mistake or distorted information. We are all, by any practical definition of the words, foolproof and incapable of error. | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development?" I am pretty self- aware and I do try to be better at correcting my flaws and become better. Don't always succeed. My strengths top and always did believe that life's journey oz about being on a path of self improvement. My triggers alas I am too prone Brexiters,Tories FlT earthed and covid deniers set me off but I am learning to simply walk away from. That's self improvement or st least a start | |||
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"I’ve got a bit behind . This posting about your flaws, don’t beat yourself up. We all have them, and it’s only human. The purpose of this thread was not for you to highlight your flaws, but to ask if you are aware of them, and if you examine them, along with your triggers? Hippy. You look fantastic. Don't let the demons get to you x" Thank you, but it’s not about me | |||
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"Reading you OP, no, I guess I am not! Is that ok for you? It’s not a criticism of those who aren’t I know I am a work in progress, aren't we all? As for triggers, I think I may be too dense to understand exactly. I don't journal but I do reflect. I dont plan much. Maybe I should? Food for thought, this thread x" That’s why I do it . You’re certainly not dense, when you’re triggered, when someone pushes your buttons, can you observe your thoughts, and see what it triggers within you? Our triggers are our teachers. | |||
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"Getting better. Started journaling. " Yay | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development? I am pretty self- aware and I do try to be better at correcting my flaws and become better. Don't always succeed. My strengths top and always did believe that life's journey oz about being on a path of self improvement. My triggers alas I am too prone Brexiters,Tories FlT earthed and covid deniers set me off but I am learning to simply walk away from. That's self improvement or st least a start" | |||
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"Getting better. Started journaling. Yay " Thank you | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. " Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. " Some of my favourite people in this conversation. You know you're all fantastic, right? | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. Some of my favourite people in this conversation. You know you're all fantastic, right?" Thank you Fifey. I am too easily distracted. I get up every Saturday morning with good intentions then I switch the news on to see the weather and befor I know it it's late morning. I can be lazy though. But that's when I don't want to do something. | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. Some of my favourite people in this conversation. You know you're all fantastic, right?" not at work stuff | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. Some of my favourite people in this conversation. You know you're all fantastic, right? not at work stuff " Aye Beryl, I'm still tied up in trap 2. Can I come out yet? X | |||
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"I would say yes I am aware of myself. I am a pretty flawless person with only two flaws. Flaw one: I do not have great tits without a bra Flaw two: I am only number 2 top forumite But other than that I am honestly incredible and very loved and super self aware. " I'll take point 1 on an advisory. Point 2 I can't vouch for and the rest goes without saying x | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. Some of my favourite people in this conversation. You know you're all fantastic, right? not at work stuff Aye Beryl, I'm still tied up in trap 2. Can I come out yet? X" I'll think about it | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. Some of my favourite people in this conversation. You know you're all fantastic, right? not at work stuff Aye Beryl, I'm still tied up in trap 2. Can I come out yet? X I'll think about it " Tease x | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. Some of my favourite people in this conversation. You know you're all fantastic, right? not at work stuff " That surprises me. You come across as a very determined and focused woman. | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. Some of my favourite people in this conversation. You know you're all fantastic, right? not at work stuff Aye Beryl, I'm still tied up in trap 2. Can I come out yet? X I'll think about it Tease x" Yes | |||
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"I know my flaws, the lack self confidence and procrastination. Negative comments about my ability and I start to doubt my ability luckily I have a fantastic colleague who points out I have the ability. Procrastination gawd where do I start. But I will tell you about that tomorrow. Oh me too with the procrastination Davie, but I've read quite a lot about it to identify why. It's not laziness. Some of my favourite people in this conversation. You know you're all fantastic, right? not at work stuff That surprises me. You come across as a very determined and focused woman. " I am, thank you. But imposter syndrome rules. | |||
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"I'm moderately self-aware, perhaps a little more. Plenty of flaws and I invest in myself, to a reasonable extent, to improve. " Agree. I’m totally self aware of my flaws 13 yrs being told by ex how to improve Result, divorce and the fact I now know people at work and in life actually like me. Do need to rain it in occasionally but I’m comfortable | |||
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"I get triggered by the smallest things and one thing I have learnt over the years is talking about it, if I just bottle something up I go into some dark places so now, I make sure I open up. In terms of stuff about myself physically, I'm not a massive lover of parts of my body and I do have hang ups about certain areas but there isn't really much I can do about it, again just talking to doughnut helps me loads when I get in a mindset like that. Danish x " I feel the need for a jammy ring all of a sudden x | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? " Not any more. What few I did have, don't bother me anymore. Before, they would. Because I allowed them to have control over me. Now I control them and if they ever come up, they get compartmentalised, ignored and I switch my conscious to something else. I just had a peek in the box and it's very small and empty. | |||
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"Fuunily enough, I've always been one for writing down my thoughts and feelings. I've done it since I was a teenager and I still do it to this day. I have actually been writing a letter to my mum for a while now and I add to it every now and again. Maybe ity morbid but I wish for it to be cremated with her x" It's! | |||
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"I get triggered by the smallest things and one thing I have learnt over the years is talking about it, if I just bottle something up I go into some dark places so now, I make sure I open up. In terms of stuff about myself physically, I'm not a massive lover of parts of my body and I do have hang ups about certain areas but there isn't really much I can do about it, again just talking to doughnut helps me loads when I get in a mindset like that. Danish x I feel the need for a jammy ring all of a sudden x" Doughnut is the wrong pastry for what you're looking for Doughnut | |||
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"By this I mean, are you aware of your flaws/triggers? Do you have an honest perception of yourself? Do you journal, and learn more about yourself? What about your triggers, when you are triggered, do you take the time to examine the root of the trigger, and work to heal it? Are you open to change/development?" Being perfect, I don't need to consider such things. | |||
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