FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Being stood up with no explanation.

Being stood up with no explanation.

By *ruit OP Woman over a year ago

near kings lynn

Was stood up last night after arranging to met a single guy. I had txt an mailed him and called him a number of times but he hasnt responded to any of them. A simple text would have been enough to say sorr I cant meet or sorry I have changed my mind. Why on earth do people do this?

Question is now do I leave a comment allbeit a polite one on his comments or is that wrong. Never been in this situation before and really love to hear from anyone with exerience of this. Or is it best to just accept that he is not a nice person with good manners and just forget it. Should I contact the people who run the site to inform them or are they not inrested/not able to do or say anything. I guess its his word against mine.

Not to self to not be so trusting lol

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

hey hun sry 2 hear u were stood up..this seems to happen an awful lot wiv everyone myself included ..i just delete them and move on i never leave a comment if they havent turned up ..plenty more genuine and lovely guys on this site

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ouvakMan over a year ago

clacton on sea

this kind of thing often comes onto the forums' and the only real advise seems to be to move on and mark it up to expirence, i'm sorry that this guy has treated you in such an ungentlemanly manor and i hope this wont put you off contacting other single men in the future, wishing you better luck in the future

regards touvy

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *heekychezzaWoman over a year ago

warrington

This unfortunately happens to just about everyone...females. males and couples...it's just one of the down sides of swinging. Yes it make you feel crap, I certainly believe that there are very few acceptable excuses for not even informing you, let alone not explaining or apologizing, but you just have to learn to let it go. At the end of the day would you really want to spend time with someone who doesn't even possess basic good manners.

Forget about him and have fun elsewhere...there are lots of lovely, genuine guys on the site. But it does help to have a bit of a rant about it I find...lol

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Was stood up last night after arranging to met a single guy. I had txt an mailed him and called him a number of times but he hasnt responded to any of them. A simple text would have been enough to say sorr I cant meet or sorry I have changed my mind. Why on earth do people do this?

Not to self to not be so trusting lol"

sorry to hear that you had ya time wasted... its an occupational hazard of swinging and I am sure we have all had it from time to time......

with regards to leaving a comment... i wouldn't bother.. as because they decide what is and isn't shown they will never show any negative feedback....

maybe its a case of working out how you are choosing the people you play with, and maybe tweeking that a bit.. your swinging radar will get better with time...honest....

sean xxx

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ruit OP Woman over a year ago

near kings lynn

Thanks everyone, yes I guess your right, best to forget it and dont bother with a comment. I have been doing this on and off for 3 years now and neve been stood uo before so guess I was doing well.

As for contacting single males again lol I have a meet arrnaged with a single male friday so deffinately still will have fun

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

well it aint happened to me yet. a guy kept me waiting yday coz he got lost. i thought if he aint coming i will just attack patrick instead.

but yes its not nice standing people up. its just bad manners

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ouvakMan over a year ago

clacton on sea

sadly it's guy's like that the give the single male on these sites a bad name, but i'd hope the genuine one's put number the timewaster's and that we can somehow them out and make the site respect those of us who are genuine

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ortheastcoupleukCouple over a year ago

easington were the sun dont shine

well like say it does happen to all ,just hope ya didnt have to travle far for this , has the emails been read ? if not give him the benefit of the dout just in case something had happened ie family wise and give a few days just in case he contact with a good excuse if the emails have been read do the same just hope this is the case ,has the user been vertifyed as been met by others ? if not it mite seem he mite of lost his bottle then he should of texted emailed telling you he felt nervy bout the meet ,end of day you have a nice profile and there will be lots of other meets hunni chin up xxx

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ruit OP Woman over a year ago

near kings lynn

I didnt have to travel luckily but had to stay at my parents with the kids for them to sit for them as dad cant now drive. So had to put myself and my kids and disturb my parents for the night which isnt good. He is verified and have a comment and chatted on msn. I dont know if he has read the texts or listned to the may voicemails I left, he has been n the site a number of times but still not read the mail Isent him, as am sure he will use it as an excuse to say he idnt read the mail. But I think prob a total of 8 emails/texts and voicemails from me to him means he shoul be able to respond to one or another. Strangely Ihavent seen him on msn so assume he has blocked me to avoid explaning. O well, life lol.

Thanks for the nice profile comment tho xx

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A guy stands up a lady? He's obviously an idiot and not worth your time!

Of course things can crop up at the last minute, but still no message and apology?

As has been said, it's these clowns who give the rest of us a bad name!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago
Forum Mod

This is why we prefer a first meet at a club if we don't know people,it makes no odds to me if they don't turn up then

Actually we had never been let down until saturday when a guy that had wanted to meet us and was meant to meet us did'nt turn up

I did'nt even realise until a few hrs into the night as we were having fun anyway, he had our number and could have contacted us if he wanted to,I certainly was'nt going to contact him

He has been online since then and has given no explanation so ive just deleted him and blocked him,I won't lose sleep over it and it did'nt lessen the fun we had on the night anyway

interesting though that all over his profile is the "im genuine I won't waste your time" rubbish that means Zilch

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

you should have mailed us we live ner swaffham and be happy too meet,, lol I have been lucky over 10 years only one time ,,,, I had meet this man before very good looking fire man ,, and he had mailed asking me again ,,,,, but i found out was not him but his mate at work on his name so Could not turn up as not him ,, lol I was hurt and mad x so dont take it too heat we live and learn even on sites like this ..... KISSES JO XXXX loads of lovelys here not all like him xxx

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *imfromGlasgowMan over a year ago

er...guess

"Should I contact the people who run the site to inform them or are they not inrested/not able to do or say anything. I guess its his word against mine.

Not to self to not be so trusting lol"

Tell everyone on your friends list and ask them tell everyone on theirs. Word will spread quickly enough.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *harpDressed ManMan over a year ago

Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else

Great, more guilt, cheers all.

I let down a lady last night too (was late - she'd left), and although I have been in touch since and she's been lovely about it, what I haven't done is explain - it would be a boring series of mundane little issues that would achieve nothing. I can't imagine she'd be that interested!

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago
Forum Mod

"Great, more guilt, cheers all.

I think the fact that you have been in touch and shes ok with it is fine,these things happen to the best of us

Its when there is no explanation and messages are ignored that its frustrating for people

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

Thankfully i have yet to be stood up. I meet at home so it wouldnt matter just would mean id got ready for nothing.

When my son was younger and lived at home when he was away and i had to plana my free time if ever i had arranged a meet i always had a back up plan in case they didnt turn up, like arranging to possibly catch up with friends down the pub. So if they hadnt have shown i wouldnt of wasted my spare timexxkarenx

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i personally dont think theres any excuse at all for not letting people know, i get a lot of guy cancel last min and by last min i mean ive been at arranged meeting place waiting for them when they have text, still annoying but whats the cost of a text? most net works give them away not excuse for not using them, i remember one guy i was meeting called me to say he couldnt come cause his mum had died, i thought bloody hell fancy thinking of me at a time like that, turned out it was a lie and he made it up to get out of meeting me lol

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I got stood up twice by 2 married men on separate occassions, without a text or phone call to say why or sorry!

That was over 7y ago

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *irtyduoCouple over a year ago

nr stirling

obviously the wife didnt know and he couldnt get away to meet ya????

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

thats what id say too

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *ruit OP Woman over a year ago

near kings lynn

I think I will deffinately try to meet some men on my weekend free at a club as its a damn good idea. It doesnt cost me very much to get in as a single fem and if they don turn up then your right there may be other people to play with. Maybe I should mail the people I am wanting to meet and say I am going to a club that eve and love to see them there if they want to then you never know hopefully one or two may turn up and that sounds like some group fun, although I am sure that alot of single men will complain at the cost involved for them and that it wouldnt be a 1 on 1 meet. But it is still a damn good idea. It saves wasting my very limited time. Yes to maybe his wife didnt know, strange isnt it that a man suddenly cant answer the many voicemails I left and texts over a weekend!! Yes maybe his wife wouldnt let him.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The day your going to the club put "at xxxxx club tonight and would like to meet some nice guys" then add yourself to the MEET TODAY section.

NEVER leave negative verifications for someone as this will help them, they can opt not to show the text of your verification but thier profile will still read "verified" and this will make people think that they are a good guy

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *averiMan over a year ago

Swindon to bristol

it happends...most times to us blokes I guess.

I got 'cancelled' this week but did recieve a nice text explaining why with the offer of another day. This is fine as 'stuff happens'to us all making us change plans.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I stand upp quite often with no reason other than I'm sick of sitting.

Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote or View forums list

By *heekychezzaWoman over a year ago

warrington

I got stood up last night....no explanation or apology....until this morning when I found an offline instant message on msn saying "shit, I forgot"

......