FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > It's not just about sex
It's not just about sex
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Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that. "
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By *byeguysCouple (MM)
over a year ago
Paisley |
It’s a mix of both for us. The end goal is sexual adventure, but we love socials and romancing the person we’re meeting first. Even if it’s just a one time thing, there’s something to be gained from having coffee, going for dinner, or meeting for drinks and having a good old flirt.
I think it’s that it builds the attraction and the sexual tension ahead of the act. |
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"Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that. "
exactly this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s a mix of both for us. The end goal is sexual adventure, but we love socials and romancing the person we’re meeting first. Even if it’s just a one time thing, there’s something to be gained from having coffee, going for dinner, or meeting for drinks and having a good old flirt.
I think it’s that it builds the attraction and the sexual tension ahead of the act."
You are rare.  |
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I do think over the last 18 months the site has attracted and is now awash with guys/men and …. Boys  who believe this is a ‘fuck and go’ site
Anyone with manners, morals and principles….. and the obligatory kinky fuckery is quite rare! |
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"Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that. "
Arh, what an incredibly condescending smug statement. Carrying on with the condescension, we'll assume you have access to information and an amazing insight into the minds of men on here and your right, single straight guys do view the site as a way to purley get laid, and so what? I mean i don't like it when they whinge complain about why they don't get more success, it looks pithy and lame. But i dont have a problem the fact that someone is just here for sex, because believe me there are single straight women and couples that share similar views. This air of Sexual superiority that you kinda waft about citing what Alice did, and your reaction been giddy romantic, You choose a piss poor example. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that.
Arh, what an incredibly condescending smug statement. Carrying on with the condescension, we'll assume you have access to information and an amazing insight into the minds of men on here and your right, single straight guys do view the site as a way to purley get laid, and so what? I mean i don't like it when they whinge complain about why they don't get more success, it looks pithy and lame. But i dont have a problem the fact that someone is just here for sex, because believe me there are single straight women and couples that share similar views. This air of Sexual superiority that you kinda waft about citing what Alice did, and your reaction been giddy romantic, You choose a piss poor example. "
Whilst this could have been phrased in a less confrontational way, I more or less agree with the premise. Seems a pattern on the forums that you don’t experience when just chatting to people individually *shrug* |
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"I do think over the last 18 months the site has attracted and is now awash with guys/men and …. Boys who believe this is a ‘fuck and go’ site
Anyone with manners, morals and principles….. and the obligatory kinky fuckery is quite rare! "
Especially young guys. I have never had so many messages from 20 somethings...x |
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By *agic.MMan
over a year ago
Orpington |
"Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that. "
OK, but fab isn't just for swingers...it can be a swinging site, a dating site, a hook-up site, a socializing site...there are plenty of singles here that don't want to interact with couples. I agree most men here just want to have a quick shag with any woman...any random woman...single woman, married woman... or even with Alice. That's all they care about and you won't be able to change their perspective anytime soon |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Where does Alice shop???
I think any website that is sexually related will always draw those that believe that a one liner of"Do you finger your ahole"
Will have women dropping there panties. It's just how things are these days it seems.
It's just down to understanding how things work. Personally I enjoy the company of a couple and ensuring that everyone has had fun. |
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"OK, but fab isn't just for swingers...it can be a swinging site, a dating site, a hook-up site, a socializing site...there are plenty of singles here that don't want to interact with couples. I agree most men here just want to have a quick shag with any woman...any random woman...single woman, married woman... or even with Alice. That's all they care about and you won't be able to change their perspective anytime soon "
I have neither the time, nor the energy to change anyone's perspective. My post wasn't mwant as a whinge, as much as a celebration of the lifestyle. |
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"100% agree it's not just about sex. But--if you are so turned on about her snogging a random guy, how can you expect other random guys to not think it's just about sex?"
I'm not sure I follow your logic? However, I did not say I was turned-on. My specific focus was on the loving/caring/affectionate feelings it evokes. |
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"Arh, what an incredibly condescending smug statement. Carrying on with the condescension, we'll assume you have access to information and an amazing insight into the minds of men on here and your right, single straight guys do view the site as a way to purley get laid, and so what? I mean i don't like it when they whinge complain about why they don't get more success, it looks pithy and lame. But i dont have a problem the fact that someone is just here for sex, because believe me there are single straight women and couples that share similar views. This air of Sexual superiority that you kinda waft about citing what Alice did, and your reaction been giddy romantic, You choose a piss poor example. "
I'm not sure I see the smugness or sexual superiority in what I wrote, but you're welcome to.
I'm sorry that my example was insufficient to convey the point you think I was making. I merely wanted to share how positive swinging is for us as a couple and how it brings us closer together romantically, rather than just something we do to get our rocks off. You can choose to appreciate that and be happy for us, or get offended and read all sorts of tone into my post. |
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"We enjoy the social side of swinging but as far as our relationship with other people goes it *is* just about sex. We don't feel romantically towards them and we quite like meeting single men "
Sorry, I appear to have been unclear in my original post. Firstly, I meant it's not just about sex *for us.* Secondly, the romantic feelings I referred to were my feelings for Alice. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that. "
How's that not about sex? |
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"Might Alice go to the "porkie pies" shop ?"
It's possible, though I tend to believe what she tells me. And as I've seen it on at least one occasion, and witnessed her flirting elsewhere, I have no reason to doubt her. |
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"Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that.
How's that not about sex? "
The thread is titled it's not *just* about sex. And in the post you quoted, I share how when Alice has an encounter like that (which was just meant as an example), I don't immediately want to jump her. It actually evokes romantic/soppy feelings in me. |
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By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago
Bognor Regis |
"Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that. "
I'm confused- where was the romance when Alice was out playing tonsil tennis with some rando?? I think you're the one who doesn't understand... |
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"I'm confused- where was the romance when Alice was out playing tonsil tennis with some rando?? I think you're the one who doesn't understand..."
What don't I understand? When I learn of Alice snogging some guy, or watch her flirt, or have threesomes with her etc. it evokes romantic feelings from me towards her. |
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"People can have open relationships without being swingers. "
You're absolutely right! [Looking for a Slaps My Own Forehead emoji.] I was typing quickly and with a narrow focus, so wasn't considering other forms of non-monogamy that might enjoy compersion.
Thanks for picking me up on it. |
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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago
Hull |
Judging by my local status updates there’s a lot of new men joining expecting to instantly meet lots of women willing to have sex with them straight away and they are rather disgruntled that they can’t even get a reply to their messages. One said something about he was told he could meet local ladies for nsa sex but no one is interested. I wonder if fab is advertised on porn sites implying it is that easy to get laid? It would explain the exasperated statuses and the blanket faf messages from a lot of single guys. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people on Fab - to generalise, mainly single males - seem to think this is just a hook up site. Yet, as part of a couple, I can honestly say that swinging is also kinda romantic.
When Alice comes back from e.g. the shops and says she's snogged some random stranger, I actually feel a burst of lovey-dovey feelings for her.
I don't think anyone other than swingers would understand that.
How's that not about sex?
The thread is titled it's not *just* about sex. And in the post you quoted, I share how when Alice has an encounter like that (which was just meant as an example), I don't immediately want to jump her. It actually evokes romantic/soppy feelings in me. "
Ah, I see what you mean. It's the type of non-sexual feelings you have when Alice has a sexual encounter with someone else. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ah, I see what you mean. It's the type of non-sexual feelings you have when Alice has a sexual encounter with someone else.
Yeah. Sorry, I have clearly written a very *unclear* post!  "
No worries. |
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"I can see Northampton centre being busy at the weekend.
Full of guys wearing t-shirts saying' is your name Alice?'"
She tends to go for nice eyes, a cheeky smile and a good bum - oh, and the ability to flirt - so I'm not sure a t-shirt would get you very far. By all means, give it a go though! ?? |
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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"I can see Northampton centre being busy at the weekend.
Full of guys wearing t-shirts saying' is your name Alice?'
She tends to go for nice eyes, a cheeky smile and a good bum - oh, and the ability to flirt - so I'm not sure a t-shirt would get you very far. By all means, give it a go though! ??"
It's an icebreaker.
Not sure my bum is upto her standards.  |
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For us it’s all about the socialising and getting to know the single or couples we are hoping to play with
We are in an open relationship, but we ie each other still want to see /meet the person our other half is going to have a single date with
And yes the reclaim sex is amazing and I get really turned on watching my hubby pleasuring another women and seeing her left satisfied  |
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