FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Being straight
Being straight
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because unfortunately transgender and TV/cross dresser are lumped in to the same category. And without checking in to it can be viewed as the same thing. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Firstly don't let what other people do on here bother you. Secondly a lot of men and women are on a journey of self discovery. Kinks can change as you experience more things. It really annoys me that we have to 'box' ourselves on here and in life in general.
Also there still is a massive social stigma attached to guys who do list themselves as bi or bi curious , not only from men but from women too who simply will not meet a bi/bi curious male, so they stay listed as straight.
We are all on our own journeys, live and let live and only concentrate on your self rather than what anyone else is doing on here (Mrs) |
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"Some men will argue that they can suck 1000 cocks but as they are only attracted to women they are 100 per cent straight. Ive never unstood that one tbh."
If a cock has been sucked your at least bi surely ? |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me "
Why a straight person would be worried about the sexual preferences of another straight person baffles me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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More importantly - why is it seen as ok to make fun of or criticise people that experiment or experience more?
Deffo vibes of superiority complex in certain comments whenever this topic is brought up. As if being “pure straight” is top of the hierarchy and everything else is lesser.
I find it a bit saddening and disheartening. I feel sorry for men that get criticised and looked down upon for enjoying themselves |
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me
Why a straight person would be worried about the sexual preferences of another straight person baffles me."
AND THIS. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some men will argue that they can suck 1000 cocks but as they are only attracted to women they are 100 per cent straight. Ive never unstood that one tbh.
If a cock has been sucked your at least bi surely ?"
Why does it matter to you? |
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Not everyone will see things in the same way as you. For me, being straight means only being attracted to, and engaging sexually to women. But for other people, it might be different. Its not a big deal to me. People can do what they like |
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"Some men will argue that they can suck 1000 cocks but as they are only attracted to women they are 100 per cent straight. Ive never unstood that one tbh.
If a cock has been sucked your at least bi surely ?
Why does it matter to you? "
Oh it doesn't matter to me, just seems odd that people are so scared of admitting to being at least bi curious, surely theres worst things to be. I know for a fact if I was a man or even a woman who engaged in sexual activity with the same sex I'd be openly bi, not try so hard not to be labelled as that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some men will argue that they can suck 1000 cocks but as they are only attracted to women they are 100 per cent straight. Ive never unstood that one tbh.
If a cock has been sucked your at least bi surely ?
Why does it matter to you?
Oh it doesn't matter to me, just seems odd that people are so scared of admitting to being at least bi curious, surely theres worst things to be. I know for a fact if I was a man or even a woman who engaged in sexual activity with the same sex I'd be openly bi, not try so hard not to be labelled as that."
I was replying to the response to your comment. I could have been clearer with my quoting. Apologies. |
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"Firstly don't let what other people do on here bother you. Secondly a lot of men and women are on a journey of self discovery. Kinks can change as you experience more things. It really annoys me that we have to 'box' ourselves on here and in life in general.
Also there still is a massive social stigma attached to guys who do list themselves as bi or bi curious , not only from men but from women too who simply will not meet a bi/bi curious male, so they stay listed as straight.
We are all on our own journeys, live and let live and only concentrate on your self rather than what anyone else is doing on here (Mrs) "
The policing of other people's identities is very tiresome. |
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There’s different types of verifications they’re not all after sex. Could easily have just met up in a club or in a social setting.
Also they may have met up with a Trans Woman as they get lumped in to the TV/TS category.
Either way it’s their profile, their sexuality and their business. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Firstly don't let what other people do on here bother you. Secondly a lot of men and women are on a journey of self discovery. Kinks can change as you experience more things. It really annoys me that we have to 'box' ourselves on here and in life in general.
Also there still is a massive social stigma attached to guys who do list themselves as bi or bi curious , not only from men but from women too who simply will not meet a bi/bi curious male, so they stay listed as straight.
We are all on our own journeys, live and let live and only concentrate on your self rather than what anyone else is doing on here (Mrs) "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Maybe they didn’t realise it was a cock in their hand. Or maybe they were ambushed by the penis.
I mean if the guy was assured by his advisors it wasn’t a party and no rules were being broken… err I mean friends, not advisors. And penis not party. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because unfortunately transgender and TV/cross dresser are lumped in to the same category. And without checking in to it can be viewed as the same thing. "
Totally this!!! X  |
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"Because unfortunately transgender and TV/cross dresser are lumped in to the same category. And without checking in to it can be viewed as the same thing.
Totally this!!! X "
Totally agree!
Without looking at the guys veris you simply don't know if he has done the deed with a TS, a TV or as others have said met people socially only.
If he's had sex with a TS like Kylie above then he can genuinely and justifiably say he is straight, however if he is having sex with a TV like me who lives as a guy and dresses for whatever reason then by my own personal reckoning he can't say he is straight as I'm not a TS no matter what has gone off in my head at various times in my life, I'm a bloke.
The big problem with all of this isn't the labels or lack of them, it's the way judgementalism works which is why many feel the need to hide parts of themselves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Consider this - absolutely 100% straight men wouldn't allow themselves to be in the same room with other sexually aroused men and presumable wouldn't be able to stay aroused themselves. This isn't my belief, I'm just thinking in extremes.
All we're talking about is a spectrum of expected behaviour. Everyone is at different points of the spectrum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me "
Question is, you're a straight guy who clearly says "not looking for single guys" on your profile...So why are you looking at other guys profiles? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Consider this - absolutely 100% straight men wouldn't allow themselves to be in the same room with other sexually aroused men and presumable wouldn't be able to stay aroused themselves. This isn't my belief, I'm just thinking in extremes.
All we're talking about is a spectrum of expected behaviour. Everyone is at different points of the spectrum. "
Not true, straight men can have MMF 3somes or be in a club room with other couples fucking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because unfortunately transgender and TV/cross dresser are lumped in to the same category. And without checking in to it can be viewed as the same thing.
Totally this!!! X
Totally agree!
Without looking at the guys veris you simply don't know if he has done the deed with a TS, a TV or as others have said met people socially only.
If he's had sex with a TS like Kylie above then he can genuinely and justifiably say he is straight, however if he is having sex with a TV like me who lives as a guy and dresses for whatever reason then by my own personal reckoning he can't say he is straight as I'm not a TS no matter what has gone off in my head at various times in my life, I'm a bloke.
The big problem with all of this isn't the labels or lack of them, it's the way judgementalism works which is why many feel the need to hide parts of themselves."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me "
No means no. Just accept he doesn’t want to meet you. There’s no point in trying to argue him round. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me
No means no. Just accept he doesn’t want to meet you. There’s no point in trying to argue him round. "
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me
Question is, you're a straight guy who clearly says "not looking for single guys" on your profile...So why are you looking at other guys profiles? "
Maybe he's just nosey. I'm straight and not looking for couples. I look at everyone's profiles. |
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As so one who has this on there profile me personally isn't the fact of the tvs I am straight and wether that person be ts mtf I still see them as exactly that a women wether it be pre op trans or post op I enjoy playing with women and to me that is exactly what they are even if they may still have male genitals. |
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I'd guess that in a lot of cases, it's because they are only physically and romantically attracted to the opposite sex. In other words, they wouldn't want to be in a relationship with another man, nor would their head turn if they walked past an attractive one the street.
As much as they may be turned on by gay sex, or sex with a TV/TS, they probably see it more as just a fetish, than part of their broader identity.
This being said, regardless of what they broadly identify as, it would probably make more sense for them to use the term 'bi' on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Because, in the absence of an available woman, some men would shag a damp loaf
I know this might rattle a few cages, but some TV's here are men who simply dress to fuck guys who wouldn't shag them in mens clothes
Dressed as a woman but with the same 'shag a damp loaf' attitude
Sometimes their worlds collide |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because, in the absence of an available woman, some men would shag a damp loaf
I know this might rattle a few cages, but some TV's here are men who simply dress to fuck guys who wouldn't shag them in mens clothes
Dressed as a woman but with the same 'shag a damp loaf' attitude
Sometimes their worlds collide"
Shag a damp loaf  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’ve had sex with more than one other woman but consider myself straight. I’m not bisexual, I wouldn’t have a relationship with a woman and definitely prefer men. I’m not bicurious, I’ve tried it and know what I do and don’t like. |
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By *ickJMan
over a year ago
Hemel Hempstead |
Are the veris by meet or by cam? It's possible to have a "meet" veri from a social gathering or club without actually playing with that person.
Likewise cam veris can mean "this is a real person" rather than "I had sex with this person" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me "
He can say what he likes, it's his profile. But if he's sucked a cock (regardless of who it's attached to) I wouldn't say he's straight.
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"Firstly don't let what other people do on here bother you. Secondly a lot of men and women are on a journey of self discovery. Kinks can change as you experience more things. It really annoys me that we have to 'box' ourselves on here and in life in general.
Also there still is a massive social stigma attached to guys who do list themselves as bi or bi curious , not only from men but from women too who simply will not meet a bi/bi curious male, so they stay listed as straight.
We are all on our own journeys, live and let live and only concentrate on your self rather than what anyone else is doing on here (Mrs) "
Well said! |
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The problem here I think is that society (and fab) require folks to pigeon hole themselves into a very narrow description. You could describe yourself as bi-curious but what if you don't find yourself attracted at all to men, I think accepting that there is likely to be a varying amount of sexual fluidity in everyone so let's stop trying to pigeon hole folks and allow exploration without stigma  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Firstly don't let what other people do on here bother you. Secondly a lot of men and women are on a journey of self discovery. Kinks can change as you experience more things. It really annoys me that we have to 'box' ourselves on here and in life in general.
Also there still is a massive social stigma attached to guys who do list themselves as bi or bi curious , not only from men but from women too who simply will not meet a bi/bi curious male, so they stay listed as straight.
We are all on our own journeys, live and let live and only concentrate on your self rather than what anyone else is doing on here (Mrs)
Well said!"
Thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Consider this - absolutely 100% straight men wouldn't allow themselves to be in the same room with other sexually aroused men and presumable wouldn't be able to stay aroused themselves. This isn't my belief, I'm just thinking in extremes.
All we're talking about is a spectrum of expected behaviour. Everyone is at different points of the spectrum. "
I know lots of straight men who'd be fine being in the room with other sexually aroused men. It doesn't mean they want to start sucking the cocks of those men.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because, in the absence of an available woman, some men would shag a damp loaf
I know this might rattle a few cages, but some TV's here are men who simply dress to fuck guys who wouldn't shag them in mens clothes
Dressed as a woman but with the same 'shag a damp loaf' attitude
Sometimes their worlds collide"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me
He can say what he likes, it's his profile. But if he's sucked a cock (regardless of who it's attached to) I wouldn't say he's straight.
"
suck my cock |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me
Question is, you're a straight guy who clearly says "not looking for single guys" on your profile...So why are you looking at other guys profiles?
Maybe he's just nosey. I'm straight and not looking for couples. I look at everyone's profiles."
I look at everyone's profiles - male & female - as well (yours is great by the way, no gray areas, leaves a no doubt), but wouldn't question why someone has veris from same sex or says they're looking for same sex as well.
I'll talk to anyone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m openly bisexual but understand guys who say straight on their profile as they are not attracted to men ( but will happily receive oral and possibly fuck)"
Because straight men fuck each other. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The problem here I think is that society (and fab) require folks to pigeon hole themselves into a very narrow description. You could describe yourself as bi-curious but what if you don't find yourself attracted at all to men, I think accepting that there is likely to be a varying amount of sexual fluidity in everyone so let's stop trying to pigeon hole folks and allow exploration without stigma "
People pigeon hole themselves.
We live in a society where there are supposedly approximately 72 different genders (depending on what sources you look at).
Just fuck who you want to fuck and don't give people a hard time if they don't want to fuck you. It's that simple. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"He is fab-straight?
They really should have this as an option on here!!! "
Could call it “bi-fold”.
A bit like the doors. Sometimes closed and straight. Other times wide open and a little ‘bent’ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because, in the absence of an available woman, some men would shag a damp loaf
I know this might rattle a few cages, but some TV's here are men who simply dress to fuck guys who wouldn't shag them in mens clothes
Dressed as a woman but with the same 'shag a damp loaf' attitude
Sometimes their worlds collide"
I’ll be totally honest - that’s why I dress. It doesn’t do anything for me personally, but I know a LOT of men like it and the attention I get turns me on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because, in the absence of an available woman, some men would shag a damp loaf
I know this might rattle a few cages, but some TV's here are men who simply dress to fuck guys who wouldn't shag them in mens clothes
Dressed as a woman but with the same 'shag a damp loaf' attitude
Sometimes their worlds collide
I’ll be totally honest - that’s why I dress. It doesn’t do anything for me personally, but I know a LOT of men like it and the attention I get turns me on "
for the honesty. |
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I guess it depends on what way they are straight.
There are guys that would never dream of dating a guy or having a relationship with them, but enjoy sexual activities with them.
So relationship wise, I guess they would say straight but sexually bi.
Fab is a bit restrictive in it's terms and definitions though.
My question is, as a straight guy, why does it bother you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I guess it depends on what way they are straight.
There are guys that would never dream of dating a guy or having a relationship with them, but enjoy sexual activities with them.
So relationship wise, I guess they would say straight but sexually bi.
Fab is a bit restrictive in it's terms and definitions though.
My question is, as a straight guy, why does it bother you? "
I don't understand the link between fancying men, not wanting to be in a relationship with them and their sexuality
Plenty of guys lead a straight lifestyle and occasionally shag guys, therefore they are bi-sexual
The act is a homosexual act - they indulge in homosexual acts, therefore they are bi-sexual
It has zero to do with lifestyle, the term relates to the sexual act
The exception of course is having the curiosity, going there, realising it isn't for you and not going there again
Going there time and again is bi-sexual |
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"I guess it depends on what way they are straight.
There are guys that would never dream of dating a guy or having a relationship with them, but enjoy sexual activities with them.
So relationship wise, I guess they would say straight but sexually bi.
Fab is a bit restrictive in it's terms and definitions though.
My question is, as a straight guy, why does it bother you?
I don't understand the link between fancying men, not wanting to be in a relationship with them and their sexuality
Plenty of guys lead a straight lifestyle and occasionally shag guys, therefore they are bi-sexual
The act is a homosexual act - they indulge in homosexual acts, therefore they are bi-sexual
It has zero to do with lifestyle, the term relates to the sexual act
The exception of course is having the curiosity, going there, realising it isn't for you and not going there again
Going there time and again is bi-sexual "
Yes, that is how you see it, but not everyone has the same opinions.
Some people I've met have no interest at all with men apart from in a group situation, and don't want to classify them as bi-sexual as it doesn't define who they are well enough.
People can call themselves whatever they like, it really doesn't matter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am herteexible but unfortunately I have to put myself down as bisexual as there’s no option for it.
My understanding of this label is it is for someone who will have sex with both men and women but is only romantically attracted and emotionally attracted to a woman. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am herteexible but unfortunately I have to put myself down as bisexual as there’s no option for it.
My understanding of this label is it is for someone who will have sex with both men and women but is only romantically attracted and emotionally attracted to a woman. "
Heteexible. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am herteexible but unfortunately I have to put myself down as bisexual as there’s no option for it.
My understanding of this label is it is for someone who will have sex with both men and women but is only romantically attracted and emotionally attracted to a woman.
Heteexible. "
H. E. T. E. R. O. F. L. E. X. I. B. L. E. No idea why it won’t let me type it |
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By *lexV16Man
over a year ago
Welling |
"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me "
The question is why does it bother you at all, OP!?
What on earth are you as a straight man stating not looking for single guys are doing on straight single guy page checking their verifications?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I guess it depends on what way they are straight.
There are guys that would never dream of dating a guy or having a relationship with them, but enjoy sexual activities with them.
So relationship wise, I guess they would say straight but sexually bi.
Fab is a bit restrictive in it's terms and definitions though.
My question is, as a straight guy, why does it bother you?
I don't understand the link between fancying men, not wanting to be in a relationship with them and their sexuality
Plenty of guys lead a straight lifestyle and occasionally shag guys, therefore they are bi-sexual
The act is a homosexual act - they indulge in homosexual acts, therefore they are bi-sexual
It has zero to do with lifestyle, the term relates to the sexual act
The exception of course is having the curiosity, going there, realising it isn't for you and not going there again
Going there time and again is bi-sexual
Yes, that is how you see it, but not everyone has the same opinions.
Some people I've met have no interest at all with men apart from in a group situation, and don't want to classify them as bi-sexual as it doesn't define who they are well enough.
People can call themselves whatever they like, it really doesn't matter. "
It matters so, so, much
I am not denying anyone their place on the spectrum, but regularly indulging in sex with members of the same sex (group or not) is not heterosexual behaviour
Recognising and representing male bi-sexuality (in particular) is a step towards breaking down centuries of social and cultural shame
Mis-labelling or denying such behaviour just helps to keep it underground and seen ad socially unacceptable
No one has to shout it from the rooftops, but recognising it, accepting, rolling with it and discussing it with those that don't find it acceptable are all steps forward
I will also introduce the concept of internalised homophobia into play. This is certainly something that weighs very strongly with (some) guys who engage in same sex activities - and you often hear their partners use it in their 'defence' too
... "Internalised homophobia applies to conscious or un-conscious behaviors which a person feels the need to promote or conform to cultural expectations of heteronormativity or heterosexism. This can include extreme repression and denial coupled with forced outward displays of heteronormative behavior for the purpose of appearing or attempting to feel "normal" or "accepted."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am herteexible but unfortunately I have to put myself down as bisexual as there’s no option for it.
My understanding of this label is it is for someone who will have sex with both men and women but is only romantically attracted and emotionally attracted to a woman. "
Why "unfortunately"? There is nothing wrong with being bisexual. |
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"I am herteexible but unfortunately I have to put myself down as bisexual as there’s no option for it.
My understanding of this label is it is for someone who will have sex with both men and women but is only romantically attracted and emotionally attracted to a woman.
Heteexible.
H. E. T. E. R. O. F. L. E. X. I. B. L. E. No idea why it won’t let me type it"
It's because the part turns it into the laughing emoji |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me "
Why?
They like femininity. Ie not into guys so not bisexual, imho.
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"I guess it depends on what way they are straight.
There are guys that would never dream of dating a guy or having a relationship with them, but enjoy sexual activities with them.
So relationship wise, I guess they would say straight but sexually bi.
Fab is a bit restrictive in it's terms and definitions though.
My question is, as a straight guy, why does it bother you?
I don't understand the link between fancying men, not wanting to be in a relationship with them and their sexuality
Plenty of guys lead a straight lifestyle and occasionally shag guys, therefore they are bi-sexual
The act is a homosexual act - they indulge in homosexual acts, therefore they are bi-sexual
It has zero to do with lifestyle, the term relates to the sexual act
The exception of course is having the curiosity, going there, realising it isn't for you and not going there again
Going there time and again is bi-sexual
Yes, that is how you see it, but not everyone has the same opinions.
Some people I've met have no interest at all with men apart from in a group situation, and don't want to classify them as bi-sexual as it doesn't define who they are well enough.
People can call themselves whatever they like, it really doesn't matter.
It matters so, so, much
I am not denying anyone their place on the spectrum, but regularly indulging in sex with members of the same sex (group or not) is not heterosexual behaviour
Recognising and representing male bi-sexuality (in particular) is a step towards breaking down centuries of social and cultural shame
Mis-labelling or denying such behaviour just helps to keep it underground and seen ad socially unacceptable
No one has to shout it from the rooftops, but recognising it, accepting, rolling with it and discussing it with those that don't find it acceptable are all steps forward
I will also introduce the concept of internalised homophobia into play. This is certainly something that weighs very strongly with (some) guys who engage in same sex activities - and you often hear their partners use it in their 'defence' too
... "Internalised homophobia applies to conscious or un-conscious behaviors which a person feels the need to promote or conform to cultural expectations of heteronormativity or heterosexism. This can include extreme repression and denial coupled with forced outward displays of heteronormative behavior for the purpose of appearing or attempting to feel "normal" or "accepted."
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Very well put. |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me "
We have a verification from a TV, believe me I am extremely straight, however extremely social.
I suspect people project that every meet is a sexual encounter, don’t know if it’s lack of experience or nativity.
Still….
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am herteexible but unfortunately I have to put myself down as bisexual as there’s no option for it.
My understanding of this label is it is for someone who will have sex with both men and women but is only romantically attracted and emotionally attracted to a woman.
Heteexible.
H. E. T. E. R. O. F. L. E. X. I. B. L. E. No idea why it won’t let me type it
It's because the part turns it into the laughing emoji"
Thanks for that because I was really curious about why! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am herteexible but unfortunately I have to put myself down as bisexual as there’s no option for it.
My understanding of this label is it is for someone who will have sex with both men and women but is only romantically attracted and emotionally attracted to a woman.
Why "unfortunately"? There is nothing wrong with being bisexual. "
Nothing wrong with being bisexual. Nothing wrong at all. It’s just there isn’t an option for me to choose a label that suits me and I feel comfortable with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me
Why a straight person would be worried about the sexual preferences of another straight person baffles me."
Because they may be feeling slightly unnerved as people can't be trusted to keep their hands to themselves or try to get in too close to the male while meeting as couples. If a male says he's straight and that won't be changed then respect that. |
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"How the hell can a bloke say he's straight when they have veris of Tv's . . Baffles me "
This post says more about you than it does about the people receiving it giving the verifications
What does it matter what someone else has on their profile, the only profile any of us need to think about is our own |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Romantic and sexual attraction are not always differentiated when we talk about sexual attraction. I assume therefore that when men who state that they are straight even though they might be sexually attracted/curious to the same sex is because of the assumption that they might also be romantically attracted to men as well. Perhaps if we could have an option to differentiate between our romantic and sexual preferences on our profiles it might help. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Romantic and sexual attraction are not always differentiated when we talk about sexual attraction. I assume therefore that when men who state that they are straight even though they might be sexually attracted/curious to the same sex is because of the assumption that they might also be romantically attracted to men as well. Perhaps if we could have an option to differentiate between our romantic and sexual preferences on our profiles it might help."
Hence the label I use for me. |
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