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bar is open
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I'm sat in a hotel room trying to finish my final report before I head home (yeah, yeah so why am I on here...  ) And after perusing the room service menu I'd like a Mai Tai please 
Think I'll have to sit in the bar later and apply my usual all men are idiots technique - low cut dress and "would you like to buy me a drink?" (haven't been paid yet) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ill have a babysham please
Whaaat? 
You are so in touch with your feminine side ain't ya chuck Get a pint down your neck!"
I was going to ask for a snowball but thought better of it! Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ill have a babysham please
Whaaat?
You are so in touch with your feminine side ain't ya chuck Get a pint down your neck!
I was going to ask for a snowball but thought better of it! Lol "
Hehe |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"A pint of fosters cold please.....very boring I know but its a school nite so the stella has to wait until the weekend "
Well if you can get your request attended to... can I have a bit? |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Sorry I bumped into my cousin and she talks for fun  ok I'm back, anyone for nuts?
Only like salty ones
Me too, can't beat em!"
Dont want to beat anybody's nuts... would just like to suck off the coating... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Sorry I bumped into my cousin and she talks for fun ok I'm back, anyone for nuts?
Only like salty ones
Me too, can't beat em!"
I'm sat here with some jumbo ones
After being poorly all week and not drinking in what seems like ages (last Friday), I am having a glass of wine, it could go one way or the other |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Sorry I bumped into my cousin and she talks for fun ok I'm back, anyone for nuts?
Only like salty ones
Me too, can't beat em!
I'm sat here with some jumbo ones
After being poorly all week and not drinking in what seems like ages (last Friday), I am having a glass of wine, it could go one way or the other "
Well I'm letting the side down and just having diet x cooking dinner and don't drink much indoors |
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" I am having a glass of wine, it could go one way or the other
I thought wine was comsumed through the mouth and oesophagus etc? Have you invented a different way? "
It's usually vodka which is administered the other way...
Quicker into the bloodstream and no alcohol on breath! |
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"Would not mind a glass of dry chilled champagne if that s on offer?
Me too please Thank god my champagne guzzling mate is here - I am being bullied you know! "
Oi leave my mate alone, just pass the bottle sweety  |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
" I am having a glass of wine, it could go one way or the other
I thought wine was comsumed through the mouth and oesophagus etc? Have you invented a different way?
It's usually vodka which is administered the other way...
Quicker into the bloodstream and no alcohol on breath! "
Ah! Am thinking of the Natwest ad - there is another way |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Would not mind a glass of dry chilled champagne if that s on offer?
Me too please Thank god my champagne guzzling mate is here - I am being bullied you know!
Oi leave my mate alone, just pass the bottle sweety "
Thanks, much appreciated |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Would not mind a glass of dry chilled champagne if that s on offer?
Me too please Thank god my champagne guzzling mate is here - I am being bullied you know! "
We have a lovely bottle chilling, was going to offer you a glass but not now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" I am having a glass of wine, it could go one way or the other
I thought wine was comsumed through the mouth and oesophagus etc? Have you invented a different way? "
Refer to my comment re champers, and you're sacked already for taking the pee |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Would not mind a glass of dry chilled champagne if that s on offer?
Me too please Thank god my champagne guzzling mate is here - I am being bullied you know!
We have a lovely bottle chilling, was going to offer you a glass but not now "
Oy, what have I done now? |
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" I am having a glass of wine, it could go one way or the other
I thought wine was comsumed through the mouth and oesophagus etc? Have you invented a different way?
It's usually vodka which is administered the other way...
Quicker into the bloodstream and no alcohol on breath! Ah! Am thinking of the Natwest ad - there is another way "
Ahhhhh Sweetie, there's ALWAYS another way.
But some of them only occur to the freakishly open minded lateral thinkers |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
" I am having a glass of wine, it could go one way or the other
I thought wine was comsumed through the mouth and oesophagus etc? Have you invented a different way?
It's usually vodka which is administered the other way...
Quicker into the bloodstream and no alcohol on breath! Ah! Am thinking of the Natwest ad - there is another way
Ahhhhh Sweetie, there's ALWAYS another way.
But some of them only occur to the freakishly open minded lateral thinkers "
Oh life is so hard when you have an innocent and unblemished mind |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" I am having a glass of wine, it could go one way or the other
I thought wine was comsumed through the mouth and oesophagus etc? Have you invented a different way?
Refer to my comment re champers, and you're sacked already for taking the pee Jeeze, hired, fired and stuffed within 15 minutes.. takes some HR expertise LMAO... "
You're on your first and final warning, I like to crack my whip, but don't tell Obi that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ill have a babysham please
Whaaat?
You can have a lemonade and lump it son... now go sit in the pub garden with the others "
Who is going to push him on the swings |
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"Ive just got 3 litres of white wine here.. woo
Is it in one of those plastic jugs?
You can't be accusing Sassy of having plastic jugs..... "
How dare you put words into my mouth!
You could at least wait till the litre of cosmopolitans kicks in and I'll be incapable of riposte |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"One glass down woop
In two hours????
This could be a long night if you've got nearly 3 Ltrs left! "
I do wish you would take that suit off, its very distracting |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Ive just got 3 litres of white wine here.. woo
Is it in one of those plastic jugs?
You can't be accusing Sassy of having plastic jugs..... "
haha just seen this.. they are real |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"One glass down woop
In two hours????
This could be a long night if you've got nearly 3 Ltrs left! "
dont encourage me.. ill be taking advantage of the hot guy next door if i drink any quicker |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"One glass down woop
In two hours????
This could be a long night if you've got nearly 3 Ltrs left!
dont encourage me.. ill be taking advantage of the hot guy next door if i drink any quicker "
Piss head! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"One glass down woop
In two hours????
This could be a long night if you've got nearly 3 Ltrs left!
dont encourage me.. ill be taking advantage of the hot guy next door if i drink any quicker "
You have a hot guy next door?! Where do you live again?! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Walks in "Guiness please" pinches cute n sassys bum , asks her why she's just complained about the nob next door, was it to small? And Gives peaches a hug even though she probably don't remember me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"One glass down woop
In two hours????
This could be a long night if you've got nearly 3 Ltrs left!
dont encourage me.. ill be taking advantage of the hot guy next door if i drink any quicker
You have a hot guy next door?! Where do you live again?! "
Next door to me! |
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"One glass down woop
In two hours????
This could be a long night if you've got nearly 3 Ltrs left!
dont encourage me.. ill be taking advantage of the hot guy next door if i drink any quicker
Piss head!"
You're only bitter cos you don't live next door to Sassy.
And yes, we all know you're currently on rightmove looking for houses near to her...  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"One glass down woop
In two hours????
This could be a long night if you've got nearly 3 Ltrs left!
dont encourage me.. ill be taking advantage of the hot guy next door if i drink any quicker
You have a hot guy next door?! Where do you live again?!
Next door to me! "
Ha! |
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Looks like I've d*unk a litre of cocktails in an hour!
Time to change my location and see if any local boys want to buy me more?
Is that mercenary? Even when I'm really open about it? Will socialise for cocktails |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Currently in a hotel room
dave if you lived next door to me id wanna move.. i dont understand your language lol
I speak the queens english perfectly!!"
is that so?? Lmfao |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Please tell me the bars shut now?
There's only so much vodka and red bull someone can consume without physically exploding!! "
I'm still standing! What are you a man or a mouse?!? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Please tell me the bars shut now?
There's only so much vodka and red bull someone can consume without physically exploding!!
I'm still standing! What are you a man or a mouse?!?"
Squeak!
Have moved on to coffee now! |
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"Please tell me the bars shut
Squeak!
Have moved on to coffee now! "
Thank god for the coffee!
I don't drink coffee but am busily working my way through a full pot - got to make the final presentation at 11, the moneymaker, and oooh god I want to crawl under a stone and die |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I need a drink now . Think I have just seen a mankini "
I was bribed!
And three quarters of a bottle of stilly later - it doesn't take much persuading !! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I need a drink now . Think I have just seen a mankini
I was bribed!
And three quarters of a bottle of stilly later - it doesn't take much persuading !! "
You are so easy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I need a drink now . Think I have just seen a mankini
I was bribed!
And three quarters of a bottle of stilly later - it doesn't take much persuading !!
You are so easy "
You are so right!!!
In the right company of course!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I need a drink now . Think I have just seen a mankini
I was bribed!
And three quarters of a bottle of stilly later - it doesn't take much persuading !!
You are so easy "
he does anything for cake |
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