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Assertive women
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"Being assertive or sticking up for one's self as a woman on fab often results in being called a bitch or being misread as someone that is unkind. How do other women handle this? It's one of the most disheartening things about fab for me. Also, would love to hear from men who enjoy or can handle an assertive woman. Also, I feel like the dynamics of fab mean that women have to be more Frank in their interactions. I've often been told that women on here are up their own arses without any recognition of what it's like to actually be a woman on here. And don't get me wrong I know it's Very though to be a guy on here too. I feel like misogyny plays a massive part in what makes ffab a less than fabulous experience for many of us. " Apologies for typos, fab has been mad glitchy for me and I can't read what I'm typing. | |||
"Being assertive or sticking up for one's self as a woman on fab often results in being called a bitch or being misread as someone that is unkind. How do other women handle this? It's one of the most disheartening things about fab for me. Also, would love to hear from men who enjoy or can handle an assertive woman. Also, I feel like the dynamics of fab mean that women have to be more Frank in their interactions. I've often been told that women on here are up their own arses without any recognition of what it's like to actually be a woman on here. And don't get me wrong I know it's Very though to be a guy on here too. I feel like misogyny plays a massive part in what makes ffab a less than fabulous experience for many of us. " As long as the objective is to maintain your self respect in that circumstance and you do not become disrespectful yourself ... I met a few women that called themselves assertive, yet their attitude was arrogant and pushy and sometimes abusive. I feel many people use the word assertive as an excuse to boast themselves in a superior position and put others down. | |||
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"Being assertive or sticking up for one's self as a woman on fab often results in being called a bitch or being misread as someone that is unkind. How do other women handle this? It's one of the most disheartening things about fab for me. Also, would love to hear from men who enjoy or can handle an assertive woman. Also, I feel like the dynamics of fab mean that women have to be more Frank in their interactions. I've often been told that women on here are up their own arses without any recognition of what it's like to actually be a woman on here. And don't get me wrong I know it's Very though to be a guy on here too. I feel like misogyny plays a massive part in what makes ffab a less than fabulous experience for many of us. As long as the objective is to maintain your self respect in that circumstance and you do not become disrespectful yourself ... I met a few women that called themselves assertive, yet their attitude was arrogant and pushy and sometimes abusive. I feel many people use the word assertive as an excuse to boast themselves in a superior position and put others down." Most definitely agree with this. It is very similar to confidence and arrogance at times. | |||
"I prefer to just troll them. If I'm going to get abuse I at least want the chance to be a dick amd it's funnier than arguing. " Yes, one guy was rude and abusive and entitled to my body today so I was rude back. Sometimes I just block but it felt quite gratifying to tell him that his head was so far stuck up his own ass it had come out of his mouth. Hee hee. Naughty H! | |||
"I prefer to just troll them. If I'm going to get abuse I at least want the chance to be a dick amd it's funnier than arguing. Yes, one guy was rude and abusive and entitled to my body today so I was rude back. Sometimes I just block but it felt quite gratifying to tell him that his head was so far stuck up his own ass it had come out of his mouth. Hee hee. Naughty H! " It's kind of fun because it is so terribly out of character for me as I'm conflict avoident and a total people pleaser in my life outside of fab. | |||
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"Being assertive or sticking up for one's self as a woman on fab often results in being called a bitch or being misread as someone that is unkind. How do other women handle this? It's one of the most disheartening things about fab for me. Also, would love to hear from men who enjoy or can handle an assertive woman. Also, I feel like the dynamics of fab mean that women have to be more Frank in their interactions. I've often been told that women on here are up their own arses without any recognition of what it's like to actually be a woman on here. And don't get me wrong I know it's Very though to be a guy on here too. I feel like misogyny plays a massive part in what makes ffab a less than fabulous experience for many of us. As long as the objective is to maintain your self respect in that circumstance and you do not become disrespectful yourself ... I met a few women that called themselves assertive, yet their attitude was arrogant and pushy and sometimes abusive. I feel many people use the word assertive as an excuse to boast themselves in a superior position and put others down."  | |||
"I prefer to just troll them. If I'm going to get abuse I at least want the chance to be a dick amd it's funnier than arguing. Yes, one guy was rude and abusive and entitled to my body today so I was rude back. Sometimes I just block but it felt quite gratifying to tell him that his head was so far stuck up his own ass it had come out of his mouth. Hee hee. Naughty H! " That doesn't sound like assertiveness to me  | |||
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"Being assertive or sticking up for one's self as a woman on fab often results in being called a bitch or being misread as someone that is unkind. How do other women handle this? It's one of the most disheartening things about fab for me. Also, would love to hear from men who enjoy or can handle an assertive woman. Also, I feel like the dynamics of fab mean that women have to be more Frank in their interactions. I've often been told that women on here are up their own arses without any recognition of what it's like to actually be a woman on here. And don't get me wrong I know it's Very though to be a guy on here too. I feel like misogyny plays a massive part in what makes ffab a less than fabulous experience for many of us. " Never apologise for being yourself. We are who we are and people that don’t accept it can move on. Be yourself and embrace it  | |||
"She sat at the back and they said she was shy, She led from the front and they hated her pride, They asked her advice and then questioned her guidance, They branded her loud, then were shocked by her silence, When she shared no ambition they said it was sad, So she told them her dreams and they said she was mad, They told her they’d listen, then covered their ears, And gave her a hug while they laughed at her fears, And she listened to all of it thinking she could, Be the girl they told her to be, best as she could, But one day she asked what was best for herself, Instead of trying to please everyone else, So she walked to the forest and stood with the trees, She heard the wind whisper and dance with the leaves, She spoke to the willow, the elm and the pine, And she told them what she’d been told time after time, She told them she felt she was never enough, She was either too little or far far too much, Too loud or too quiet, too fierce or too weak, Too wise or too foolish, too bold or too meek, Then she found a small clearing surrounded by firs, And she stopped….and she heard what the trees said to her, And she sat there for hours not wanting to leave, For the forest said nothing, it just let her breathe. (Becky Hemsley - Talking to the wild) " Lovely  | |||
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"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational. " I remember that video was doing the rounds of the woman who refused to be the one to move out the way when walking through New York and started recording how many men and women she collided with as a result (many men and zero women). It made me so much more aware of it and I've noticed it ever since. It's shocking how often you're even forced to stop completely because someone doesn't move over even if there's plenty of room for you both to keep walking yet I sometimes must walk double the distance weaving back and forth and even stepping off the pavement to let people past because they don't want to give up their place in the centre of the empty pavement. | |||
"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational. I remember that video was doing the rounds of the woman who refused to be the one to move out the way when walking through New York and started recording how many men and women she collided with as a result (many men and zero women). It made me so much more aware of it and I've noticed it ever since. It's shocking how often you're even forced to stop completely because someone doesn't move over even if there's plenty of room for you both to keep walking yet I sometimes must walk double the distance weaving back and forth and even stepping off the pavement to let people past because they don't want to give up their place in the centre of the empty pavement. " Yep! I’m not advocating being rude obviously, but women are as entitled to take space up as anyone else. | |||
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"Op I don't really care If someone mistakes my assertiveness for being bitchy. That's their issue not mine " Damn right! | |||
"Being assertive or sticking up for one's self as a woman on fab often results in being called a bitch or being misread as someone that is unkind. How do other women handle this? It's one of the most disheartening things about fab for me. Also, would love to hear from men who enjoy or can handle an assertive woman. Also, I feel like the dynamics of fab mean that women have to be more Frank in their interactions. I've often been told that women on here are up their own arses without any recognition of what it's like to actually be a woman on here. And don't get me wrong I know it's Very though to be a guy on here too. I feel like misogyny plays a massive part in what makes ffab a less than fabulous experience for many of us. " You’re 100% spot on about the misogyny issue on here.. there’s been a definite push buck in society against so called “woke” topics and a rise in anti-feminist behaviour is part of that. Unfortunately there are a growing number of men that feel entitled to something and feel threatened by the thought of women being equal in all aspects of life, who then perceive anyone who declines their advances as being in the wrong… these ignorant guys are also growing on here as well. Not enough of them get called out on this by other men unfortunately… but there are some of us that do like assertive and empowered women on here! | |||
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"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational. I remember that video was doing the rounds of the woman who refused to be the one to move out the way when walking through New York and started recording how many men and women she collided with as a result (many men and zero women). It made me so much more aware of it and I've noticed it ever since. It's shocking how often you're even forced to stop completely because someone doesn't move over even if there's plenty of room for you both to keep walking yet I sometimes must walk double the distance weaving back and forth and even stepping off the pavement to let people past because they don't want to give up their place in the centre of the empty pavement. Yep! I’m not advocating being rude obviously, but women are as entitled to take space up as anyone else." Yep. I have started to occasionally refuse to be bullied out the way. I was going through the automatic doors to leave my tesco the other week and they're wide enough for 4 or 5 people to walk through at the same time (think big main entrance doors) and I was at the very edge of them and ended up face to face with a guy who was slightly to the side of me so he was further into the doorway and he genuinely looked to me to move over even though in the position we were in, me moving over would mean me moving and waiting to the side of the door so he could pass through a huge, empty doorway as his position was blocking me from moving to the side where there was more doorway. What kind of madness is that!? | |||
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"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational. I remember that video was doing the rounds of the woman who refused to be the one to move out the way when walking through New York and started recording how many men and women she collided with as a result (many men and zero women). It made me so much more aware of it and I've noticed it ever since. It's shocking how often you're even forced to stop completely because someone doesn't move over even if there's plenty of room for you both to keep walking yet I sometimes must walk double the distance weaving back and forth and even stepping off the pavement to let people past because they don't want to give up their place in the centre of the empty pavement. Yep! I’m not advocating being rude obviously, but women are as entitled to take space up as anyone else. Yep. I have started to occasionally refuse to be bullied out the way. I was going through the automatic doors to leave my tesco the other week and they're wide enough for 4 or 5 people to walk through at the same time (think big main entrance doors) and I was at the very edge of them and ended up face to face with a guy who was slightly to the side of me so he was further into the doorway and he genuinely looked to me to move over even though in the position we were in, me moving over would mean me moving and waiting to the side of the door so he could pass through a huge, empty doorway as his position was blocking me from moving to the side where there was more doorway. What kind of madness is that!? " It is ridiculous. I’ve started doing the same. | |||
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"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational. "
People walking 2 side by side on pavements and expect me to walk in the road rather than them just walking single file for 5 seconds.
I don't move anymore. Or I walk on the inside so they have to step in the road. | |||
"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational.
People walking 2 side by side on pavements and expect me to walk in the road rather than them just walking single file for 5 seconds.
I don't move anymore. Or I walk on the inside so they have to step in the road. "I just stop lol. I get quite miffed when dog walkers expect me to step off the path into mud so that their dog doesn't have to   | |||
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"I feel on fab I have to be assertive as so many don't read profile before they message etc. If its clear by there message they haven't read my profile then I always reply, please read my profile. This is often replied to with abuse and being called names. " Strange how quickly their perceptions change when doubt is cast upon their intentions | |||
"I feel on fab I have to be assertive as so many don't read profile before they message etc. If its clear by there message they haven't read my profile then I always reply, please read my profile. This is often replied to with abuse and being called names. Strange how quickly their perceptions change when doubt is cast upon their intentions " . Indeed! I suppose they're doing you a favour in the long run. I sometimes wonder if I'm suitably thick skinned for fab. | |||
"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational.
People walking 2 side by side on pavements and expect me to walk in the road rather than them just walking single file for 5 seconds.
I don't move anymore. Or I walk on the inside so they have to step in the road. "I fake cough now, that soon sends them scurrying out the way | |||
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"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational.
People walking 2 side by side on pavements and expect me to walk in the road rather than them just walking single file for 5 seconds.
I don't move anymore. Or I walk on the inside so they have to step in the road.
I just stop lol. I get quite miffed when dog walkers expect me to step off the path into mud so that their dog doesn't have to "Sometimes I stop. Especially if they are oblivious chatting or looking at their phone. They can walk into me, I'm like a grumpy brick wall.  | |||
"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational.
People walking 2 side by side on pavements and expect me to walk in the road rather than them just walking single file for 5 seconds.
I don't move anymore. Or I walk on the inside so they have to step in the road.
I fake cough now, that soon sends them scurrying out the way " | |||
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"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational.
People walking 2 side by side on pavements and expect me to walk in the road rather than them just walking single file for 5 seconds.
I don't move anymore. Or I walk on the inside so they have to step in the road.
I just stop lol. I get quite miffed when dog walkers expect me to step off the path into mud so that their dog doesn't have to
Sometimes I stop. Especially if they are oblivious chatting or looking at their phone. They can walk into me, I'm like a grumpy brick wall. "I tend to judge the situation. I find the most polite are groups of teenage guys, they tend to stand back or move to let me through. During lockdown they would go out of their way to allow me to walk past them. What I really dislike are the people who walk deliberately slowly in front of my car when crossing the road. These tend to be young men and women of around 15 or 16 or quite old people. I feel I'm asserting my ability to digress here though vie I'll bugger off | |||
" And she stopped….and she heard what the trees said to her, And she sat there for hours not wanting to leave, For the forest said nothing, it just let her breathe. (Becky Hemsley - Talking to the wild) " Beautiful words | |||
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"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational.
People walking 2 side by side on pavements and expect me to walk in the road rather than them just walking single file for 5 seconds.
I don't move anymore. Or I walk on the inside so they have to step in the road.
I just stop lol. I get quite miffed when dog walkers expect me to step off the path into mud so that their dog doesn't have to
Sometimes I stop. Especially if they are oblivious chatting or looking at their phone. They can walk into me, I'm like a grumpy brick wall.
I tend to judge the situation. I find the most polite are groups of teenage guys, they tend to stand back or move to let me through. During lockdown they would go out of their way to allow me to walk past them.
What I really dislike are the people who walk deliberately slowly in front of my car when crossing the road. These tend to be young men and women of around 15 or 16 or quite old people. I feel I'm asserting my ability to digress here though vie I'll bugger off "Good point, I've found teenage boys to be most polite. If it's a couple of old people I'd move but glare at them. A la Micky Flanagan. | |||
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"I recognise a few from the thread where we talked about people pleasers. It strikes me that when women stop being people pleasers, that's when they encounter pushback. (Goes for anyone tbh). But one can be unbending and polite. "Exactly right, you can uphold your boundaries firmly and confidently, without being rude, however some people will still take that as rude, and you can’t do anything about that. | |||
"I feel on fab I have to be assertive as so many don't read profile before they message etc. If its clear by there message they haven't read my profile then I always reply, please read my profile. This is often replied to with abuse and being called names. Strange how quickly their perceptions change when doubt is cast upon their intentions . Indeed! I suppose they're doing you a favour in the long run. I sometimes wonder if I'm suitably thick skinned for fab. " I think we all have times when we feel we aren’t thick skinned enough for fab, I know I have, I’ve found it goes in stages, and has actually been quite helpful in building my ability to be kindly assertive, even though it didn’t feel like that at times. | |||
"In my experience many people mistake being assertive with being rude Being assertive is about being honest with what you want, what you don’t, and being unapologetic in it. It’s about being an adult in the interaction and rising above. Being rude back to someone that’s been rude to you isn’t assertive. It’s childish. Eye for an eye makes the whole world blind etc. To me being assertive isn’t just one thing. It’s a collection of behaviour and mannerisms that all go together to make some assertive " Agreed. I've felt sorry before for people when I've heard/read on here the responses they receive. Sending fuck off, mocking etc to a "how r u?" isn't being assertive, it's rude. I think that women as a whole aren't particularly great for being assertive - years of social conditioning to apologise for taking up too much space, for not being the ideal. That being said, I do think assertion and rudeness can be confused. | |||
"I feel on fab I have to be assertive as so many don't read profile before they message etc. If its clear by there message they haven't read my profile then I always reply, please read my profile. This is often replied to with abuse and being called names. Strange how quickly their perceptions change when doubt is cast upon their intentions " Exactly.but I have come to the point where I can laugh it off, but did appreciate you sticking up for me the last time | |||
"I feel on fab I have to be assertive as so many don't read profile before they message etc. If its clear by there message they haven't read my profile then I always reply, please read my profile. This is often replied to with abuse and being called names. Strange how quickly their perceptions change when doubt is cast upon their intentions . Indeed! I suppose they're doing you a favour in the long run. I sometimes wonder if I'm suitably thick skinned for fab. " I'm such a softy in real life but I know on fab im not simply because I have to be so straight to the point due to others behaviour. | |||
"Exactly.but I have come to the point where I can laugh it off, but did appreciate you sticking it up me the last time "Fixed it  | |||
"There’s a difference between being assertive and being rude. The trouble is that some of the time people take assertive/confident as rude, but that is their perception. I started with refusing to apologise for taking up space I.e. when I’m in a shop and need to get past someone. Don’t need to be sorry for being somewhere I’m entitled to be. I can’t do anything about those who see assertiveness as rude, or those who are misogynistic and expect women to ‘know their place’, it isn’t my problem, I can only continue to be assertive over my own rights, without being rude or confrontational.
People walking 2 side by side on pavements and expect me to walk in the road rather than them just walking single file for 5 seconds.
I don't move anymore. Or I walk on the inside so they have to step in the road.
I just stop lol. I get quite miffed when dog walkers expect me to step off the path into mud so that their dog doesn't have to
Sometimes I stop. Especially if they are oblivious chatting or looking at their phone. They can walk into me, I'm like a grumpy brick wall.
I tend to judge the situation. I find the most polite are groups of teenage guys, they tend to stand back or move to let me through. During lockdown they would go out of their way to allow me to walk past them.
What I really dislike are the people who walk deliberately slowly in front of my car when crossing the road. These tend to be young men and women of around 15 or 16 or quite old people. I feel I'm asserting my ability to digress here though vie I'll bugger off
Good point, I've found teenage boys to be most polite.
If it's a couple of old people I'd move but glare at them. A la Micky Flanagan. "I suspect I remind teenagers of their nan  .
I've never seen you and Mickey in the same room now I come to think of it... | |||
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"But what I really want to know is when are you heading into the kitchen to make me a sandwich?" In 30 minutes. Mature cheese and Branston pickle? | |||
"But what I really want to know is when are you heading into the kitchen to make me a sandwich? In 30 minutes. Mature cheese and Branston pickle? " Don’t forget to cut the crusts off! | |||
"But what I really want to know is when are you heading into the kitchen to make me a sandwich? In 30 minutes. Mature cheese and Branston pickle? " Sounds good  | |||
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"I do wonder if there has ever been an ‘Assertive men’ post on Fab, started in a similar non-sexual context. Probably not ..." I searched, there hasn’t. | |||
"I do wonder if there has ever been an ‘Assertive men’ post on Fab, started in a similar non-sexual context. Probably not ... I searched, there hasn’t. "I think it'll be the "alpha male" and then you always get the comments like "yeah, I'm an alpha male, I love to throw women round the bedroom and make them gag on my big thick cock" and the room goes....  | |||
"I do wonder if there has ever been an ‘Assertive men’ post on Fab, started in a similar non-sexual context. Probably not ... I searched, there hasn’t.
I think it'll be the "alpha male" and then you always get the comments like "yeah, I'm an alpha male, I love to throw women round the bedroom and make them gag on my big thick cock" and the room goes.... "Usually started by the least alpha type, the one who buys the guys pints hoping they be allowed to sit on the same table. | |||
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"Being assertive or sticking up for one's self as a woman on fab often results in being called a bitch or being misread as someone that is unkind. How do other women handle this? It's one of the most disheartening things about fab for me. Also, would love to hear from men who enjoy or can handle an assertive woman. Also, I feel like the dynamics of fab mean that women have to be more Frank in their interactions. I've often been told that women on here are up their own arses without any recognition of what it's like to actually be a woman on here. And don't get me wrong I know it's Very though to be a guy on here too. I feel like misogyny plays a massive part in what makes ffab a less than fabulous experience for many of us. " Sorry you feel like that but I’m not surprised. Same at work assertive women are labelled all kinds of nasty things. Culture takes a long time to change and fab will be one of the last things to change on this, it’s decades behind. Just carry on , fuck em. I bought my daughters lean in by Cheryl sandberg to prepare them for this at work …. | |||
"I've often seen it said on here that men don't like strong women. As the father of 3 strong independent women and someone who worked for one for 20+ years there seems to be a different interpretation of the words "strong" and "assertive" on here. Being strong and assertive means having the courage of your convictions and being able to stand your ground in any argument without having to resort to insults, name calling or misogyny and misandry. Some people confuse being strong and assertive with people who shout louder and longer than others. A strong assertive woman doesn't belittle others under the guise of being assertive. That's along the lines of saying "I know I'm a dick but that's just who I am" and expecting others to accept that. Some men are intimidated by truly strong assertive women but that's more about their own insecurities. " That’s all true but the issue really is how women are judged when they ex hit the exact same assertive behaviours as men, they are called awkward, pushy, not empathetic etc because society expects them not to be assertive. Assertive is simply knowing very clearly what you want and how to go about getting it, without abusing anyone. It comes very natural to many of us men and women, but it’s acceptable for men to do it, it’s seen as a strength. In west Africa most the women are more assertive than guys here in the U.K. , they have to be to survive. And so it’s more acceptable there. | |||
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