 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
During my travels across the Siberian Steppes, some years ago, I chanced upon a team of Russian palaeontologists, who were clearly in a state of heightened exuberance.
Apparently, an unseasonable deluge had washed away a section of river bank, exposing the perfectly preserved carcass of a woolly mammoth. The beast was frozen in a running posture and looked as fresh as the proverbial daisy. The Russian greybeards were quite beside themselves with glee, considering this to be the find of the century. Somehow they had got it into their heads that the specimen was at least fifteen thousand years old. I introduced myself and upon learning my identity they naturally begged me to examine their treasure and offer an authoritative opinion. I was pleased to do so, having nothing else planned for the morning. I perused the beast and proclaimed that it was indeed a woolly mammoth, of the genus Mammuthus primigenius. And that it had been dead for at least half an hour! The woolly mammoth, I explained to them, is a burrowing animal, which lives exclusively beneath the ground and is very common in these parts. It tunnels with its enormous tusks and dies instantly upon exposure to sunlight. ‘You have a nice fresh one here,’ I told them, ‘and it would be a shame to waste it.’ Without further ado I had my servants haul the carcass back to the village where I was staying and get the fire stoked up. The greybeards made a quite unnecessary fuss about this and I was forced to employ my stout stick. With typical bad grace they did not attend the barbecue. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
