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Would you tell??
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes, I'd tell them. I'd want them to make funeral arrangements with me so they didn't have those decisions to think about after I passed wondering if what they chose is what I would have wanted. Obviously the goodbyes would be important too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I most definitely would so we could make the most of the time we had left together. I'd also struggle to carry that secret around by myself, I think it would cause some major anxiety and depression. I'm lucky enough to know my loved ones would want to know so they could support me through the end of life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would tell them.
My Father in Law was terminally ill with pancreatic cancer which had spread. He kept it from us right until the week he passed, it was heartbreaking, we had no time to come to terms with it at all. What can you do or say to that?
I just couldn't put my kids through it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Let them live blissfully unaware my body is being donated to orgen transplant and medical science anyway
Wouldn’t want them to worry and fuss over me
But what I would do is spend as much time with them as possible and make happy memories for them
Unknownly so that when I do go they can look back on those joyist memories and realise I was doing it so they had happy memories off me
And not the end sick me off looking after me and being a burden on them |
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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago
Hull |
I’d definitely tell them. I’d need mental support and practical support getting my affairs in order. Plus I’d probably be acting a little erratic at times so would want people to know why and not think it was their fault etc |
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That’s a difficult one …..
As soon as you share it with someone else - family or friend it then becomes their burden too. It automatic additional worry for someone else.
I’d need to offload it somewhere but I’d be tempted to go to someone impartial initially. If it where ‘C’ I’d need to get over the shock first and find out how to deal with it before I involve anyone else. |
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"That’s a difficult one …..
As soon as you share it with someone else - family or friend it then becomes their burden too. It automatic additional worry for someone else.
I’d need to offload it somewhere but I’d be tempted to go to someone impartial initially. If it where ‘C’ I’d need to get over the shock first and find out how to deal with it before I involve anyone else. "
Yes I think this is what I’d do too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Very difficult one !
When my wife died in 2012 I was there all the way through would not let her go in to hospital or hospice so cared for her at home she died in my arms with her family around her upsetting but good to know I looked after her the best I could.
So the answer to you’re question is personally from me I’d dissapear I wouldn’t tell anyone  |
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I would tell them. I witnessed and supported my best friend die of cancer at the age of 34. It was heartbreaking, used to drive her to the hospital for chemo appointments and sit and wait with her (her family lived a long way away). Spoke to her about her fears about what was to come. I hope I made a difference to her and I'd have felt bad as a friend if she had suffered it all alone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The people closest to me I'd tell. They have a right to know so they have time to process and we have time to make some lovely memories I can leave them with. I'd want to sort my funeral, get everything in order and give certain things away to people too so that my kids and family weren't left to deal with it all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would tell them. My dad and friend told the people important to them. You never know how you are going to react. My dad was angry at being robbed of his years as he only had 6 months but my mate just wanted it over, as it had been a long time coming. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nah.
Reckon I’d have one last mega weekend with them all, major sure they know how much I love them and that I was happy and then go die alone on my own terms so they’d remember me as I was.
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I'd tell them, I used to live next to someone who had terminal cancer and told nobody the family were full of guilt after because they she went through it alone her husband never got over it and it took years for her son to come to terms with it. |
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"it would depend but I'd only tell adults if I knew with 100% certainty that they wanted to know. I'm trying to imagine a scenario where I'd know and they didn't though "
I've read the op completely wrong  .
If it was me I wouldn't be able to hide it I don't think. I probably wouldn't tell my parents though |
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Just wanted to say sorry for all those who've lost someone firstly x
Secondly I'd have to tell them so they could come along for the hell of a journey I'd have before I croaked. Make some serious memories and allow them to process it with me rather than blindside them with the loss x
Hubby already knows what I want in case I get hit by a bus so hopefully he'd do me proud x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wasn't told the truth straight away about a very close family member who was terminally ill. It really messed with my head, big style. Please don't put your loved ones through that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Been watching a documentary about dying and its got me wondering...
Would you tell loved ones/friends if you found out you had a terminal illness or just let them live blissfully unaware? "
Id tell some, depending on the relationship |
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By *avie65Man
over a year ago
In the west. |
I'm not sure as I wouldn't like the questions about an illness or people trying to act normally around me.
My mates wife didn't tell many people. I only found out the day she died, from my mate. I did quite like that she didn't tell many people which made it her thing and she controlled it. She was a very quite and reserved person and it was her to a T. |
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Depends on the individual.....
Certainly a partner. Children I'd give more consideration to depending on their age and perceived ability to cope.
If I was going to alter drastically/quickly i'd tell all the family. |
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I’d hold off telling them until I’ve got my head around it, understand what is likely to happen, get arrangements in place, etc. That way I am better prepared to support them and answer the inevitable questions. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Kinda illness related. Ive been hiding the true about me for 10yrs... i broke and had to say as it was pinching me all the time... now i feel way better and she accept it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Be very hard to come to terms with a diagnosis that meant you were terminally ill without being able to tell close family, that would tear you up. What a question to ask!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm not sure as I wouldn't like the questions about an illness or people trying to act normally around me.
My mates wife didn't tell many people. I only found out the day she died, from my mate. I did quite like that she didn't tell many people which made it her thing and she controlled it. She was a very quite and reserved person and it was her to a T. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That’s a difficult one …..
As soon as you share it with someone else - family or friend it then becomes their burden too. It automatic additional worry for someone else.
I’d need to offload it somewhere but I’d be tempted to go to someone impartial initially. If it where ‘C’ I’d need to get over the shock first and find out how to deal with it before I involve anyone else. "
I can relate to what this lady says. |
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I was diagnosed once as having a stage 4 cancer and given less than 6 months, there was no way of avoiding family knowing as I was only 20yrs old and the support I recieved helped me prove every doctor wrong. I'm 52 now 
However 11 months ago I thought for a time I'd got something that had no chance of walking away from, I deleted my profile and only confided in 2 fab friends and to this day still haven't told family.
I'm fine now but I personally wouldn't put anyone through the trauma, I'd rather see them happy in their ignorance than destroyed with knowledge.
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