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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I would like to offer myself as a person's new low.
Have you become tired of telling the same story of your worst sexual experience? If so, meet with me and I can be your new low and give you a fresh story to tell.
Have your sexual senses become dulled by all the good sex your having? If so, meet me and after becoming your new low, the good sex will feel all the better. After all, to truly appreciate the peaks, you have to experience the troughs.
*Available at all good toy stores.
**Batteries not included.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What's the refund policy? Try before you buy??"
No refunds, only exchanges. I currently stock a mouldy cucumber, Lionel Ritchie’s snooker cue and a horse shoe.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So satisfaction is not guaranteed??
You’re right. The tagline line is: Double down on disappointing dick.
Thats certainly a mouthful  "
I wish it was. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would like to offer myself as a person's new low.
Have you become tired of telling the same story of your worst sexual experience? If so, meet with me and I can be your new low and give you a fresh story to tell.
Have your sexual senses become dulled by all the good sex your having? If so, meet me and after becoming your new low, the good sex will feel all the better. After all, to truly appreciate the peaks, you have to experience the troughs.
*Available at all good toy stores.
**Batteries not included.
"
 love it x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's always good to have a friend to patronise .... I'll have a good think about this "
Don’t dilly dally and dither. Buy today. Waiters become haters. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I would like to offer myself as a person's new low.
Have you become tired of telling the same story of your worst sexual experience? If so, meet with me and I can be your new low and give you a fresh story to tell.
Have your sexual senses become dulled by all the good sex your having? If so, meet me and after becoming your new low, the good sex will feel all the better. After all, to truly appreciate the peaks, you have to experience the troughs.
*Available at all good toy stores.
**Batteries not included.
love it x"
Thank you. I’m not great but I try to put a smile on people’s faces. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would like to offer myself as a person's new low.
Have you become tired of telling the same story of your worst sexual experience? If so, meet with me and I can be your new low and give you a fresh story to tell.
Have your sexual senses become dulled by all the good sex your having? If so, meet me and after becoming your new low, the good sex will feel all the better. After all, to truly appreciate the peaks, you have to experience the troughs.
*Available at all good toy stores.
**Batteries not included.
"
That’s ok notch on the bedpost is a notch on the bedpost regardless is it was a good or bad the shag is it all ads to the end total 
Oooo god hopefully everyone gets I am make jokes lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"These are big claims with the bar already being ridiculously low on here!"
This is a new one. This is the first time I’ve felt pressure to perform badly. Usually I’d just rock up, do my thing, disappoint and leave in shame. Should I go into training, have a Rocky type montage? What if I actually got an erection this time? I’d be so ashamed of myself. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I would like to offer myself as a person's new low.
Have you become tired of telling the same story of your worst sexual experience? If so, meet with me and I can be your new low and give you a fresh story to tell.
Have your sexual senses become dulled by all the good sex your having? If so, meet me and after becoming your new low, the good sex will feel all the better. After all, to truly appreciate the peaks, you have to experience the troughs.
*Available at all good toy stores.
**Batteries not included.
That’s ok notch on the bedpost is a notch on the bedpost regardless is it was a good or bad the shag is it all ads to the end total
Oooo god hopefully everyone gets I am make jokes lol "
I don’t have any notches…..in fact I don’t even have a bedpost. I barely have a bed but I do come with a free roll-up yoga mat.
*Yoga mat limited time offer. Available while stocks last. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I would like to offer myself as a person's new low.
Have you become tired of telling the same story of your worst sexual experience? If so, meet with me and I can be your new low and give you a fresh story to tell.
Have your sexual senses become dulled by all the good sex your having? If so, meet me and after becoming your new low, the good sex will feel all the better. After all, to truly appreciate the peaks, you have to experience the troughs.
*Available at all good toy stores.
**Batteries not included.
That’s ok notch on the bedpost is a notch on the bedpost regardless is it was a good or bad the shag is it all ads to the end total
Oooo god hopefully everyone gets I am make jokes lol
I don’t have any notches…..in fact I don’t even have a bedpost. I barely have a bed but I do come with a free roll-up yoga mat.
*Yoga mat limited time offer. Available while stocks last. "
I was meaning my bed post ha ha when it comes to guys for me it’s just mostly sex not meet a guy I would say I would date as per say so my dynamic with guys is emmm high number per say that’s not to say I not open to other things just not found someone that I would be open to it with so hence the notches on the bed post reference ha ha lol |
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