FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Type of messages ….
Type of messages ….
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"As I've said before, a message that shows that, without a shadow of a doubt they 100% have:
1) Read my profile
2) Match what my profile says I am looking for
 "
Not necessarily type of guy … but what they write. How they word their message, if they give you all the details etc in the first message or if they say hi little chat then wait to progress from there if you respond. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"As I've said before, a message that shows that, without a shadow of a doubt they 100% have:
1) Read my profile
2) Match what my profile says I am looking for
^ this "
Again, if they tick your ‘type of man (single, hair, tattoos, height etc) is not what I’m saying…. What I’m asking is what should they put in their message…. Do you want their life story straight away or just a little about themselves to intrigue you in  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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It seems I didn’t get across what I was getting at…. It’s not if the guy necessarily fits what you’re asking for but instead what he writes in his message. Compliments to your profile it seems are wanted, but what else should he say? Do you want to k ow about his swinger experiences? Do you want to know all the ins & outs or everything? Or do you just want a little introduction and then go from there ? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I like my messages to come from hot guys.
Yeah tbf if I don’t fancy you it doesn’t really matter what you wrote in a message. "
So a face pic will be the decider… so just go with that ? |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Honestly, there is no one answer. It depends entirely on my mood at the time.
Assuming that they tick even some of my boxes (which really is hard enough because my boxes are pesky and move anyway), a "Hi" can be enough if I'm in the mood to chat. And sometimes I want a bit more.
This is the big problem with asking about what kind of initial messages we like..... a lot of us either can't put our finger on it or change out minds too much to be able to answer.
Women are pesky  |
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"As I've said before, a message that shows that, without a shadow of a doubt they 100% have:
1) Read my profile
2) Match what my profile says I am looking for
Not necessarily type of guy … but what they write. How they word their message, if they give you all the details etc in the first message or if they say hi little chat then wait to progress from there if you respond. "
If they haven't read the profile and/or do not match they can offer me £ million but I'll still ignore.
I'm not giving you your opening lines.
If you don't know how to talk to people yourself you will struggle anyway. |
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"I like my messages to come from hot guys.
Yeah tbf if I don’t fancy you it doesn’t really matter what you wrote in a message.
So a face pic will be the decider… so just go with that ? "
Face pic definitely helps. But a nice body goes down well too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like my messages to come from hot guys.
Yeah tbf if I don’t fancy you it doesn’t really matter what you wrote in a message.
So a face pic will be the decider… so just go with that ?
Face pic definitely helps. But a nice body goes down well too. "
I second the hot naked body |
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Messages written in English, not in lazy text speak. My all time best is still "U FK NOW".
Also, as has been mentioned, a message which shows they've read my profile. It clearly states "NO BEARDS OR FACIAL HAIR". Yet I constantly get messages from members of ZZ TOP and bearded monthly. Then THEY get upset when I don't reply! Go figure. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Honestly, there is no one answer. It depends entirely on my mood at the time.
Assuming that they tick even some of my boxes (which really is hard enough because my boxes are pesky and move anyway), a "Hi" can be enough if I'm in the mood to chat. And sometimes I want a bit more.
This is the big problem with asking about what kind of initial messages we like..... a lot of us either can't put our finger on it or change out minds too much to be able to answer.
Women are pesky "
And there it is…. There’s no right answer so it’s a roulette  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As I've said before, a message that shows that, without a shadow of a doubt they 100% have:
1) Read my profile
2) Match what my profile says I am looking for
^this
"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"As I've said before, a message that shows that, without a shadow of a doubt they 100% have:
1) Read my profile
2) Match what my profile says I am looking for
Not necessarily type of guy … but what they write. How they word their message, if they give you all the details etc in the first message or if they say hi little chat then wait to progress from there if you respond.
If they haven't read the profile and/or do not match they can offer me £ million but I'll still ignore.
I'm not giving you your opening lines.
If you don't know how to talk to people yourself you will struggle anyway."
Haha I’m not asking for opening lines…. I’m asking peoples opinions…. Because some reply to a short message where as others ask for more detail… it was a simple pole not an ‘in’  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Messages written in English, not in lazy text speak. My all time best is still "U FK NOW".
Also, as has been mentioned, a message which shows they've read my profile. It clearly states "NO BEARDS OR FACIAL HAIR". Yet I constantly get messages from members of ZZ TOP and bearded monthly. Then THEY get upset when I don't reply! Go figure. "
Lol at ZZ Top  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I like my messages to come from hot guys.
Yeah tbf if I don’t fancy you it doesn’t really matter what you wrote in a message.
So a face pic will be the decider… so just go with that ?
Face pic definitely helps. But a nice body goes down well too. "
Makes sense…. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"But of course I’m only speaking for me. So not really helpful for messaging anyone else. "
Oh I’m aware there isn’t a one fits all…. I’m just being curious |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It’s not if the guy necessarily fits what you’re asking for
Then he has no business messaging me.
OP you are misunderstanding what women/couples want."
I think you are misunderstanding what I was getting at… ah well maybe I didn’t get across my question properly …. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"That they’ve read my profile and don’t just ignore the parts they don’t match. I also like to know a bit about them and why they’re interested in me. "
Thank you…. My point came across it seems as to what I was asking |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
"
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer."
Great response .. thanks for the tips |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I appreciate a well-written message, with a bit of time and effort put in. I like when it refers to something in my profile, rather than a generic message sent out to loads of people!
Good spelling, grammar and humour. A face pic too. And I’m all yours |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer."
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I appreciate a well-written message, with a bit of time and effort put in. I like when it refers to something in my profile, rather than a generic message sent out to loads of people!
Good spelling, grammar and humour. A face pic too. And I’m all yours "
Seems straight forward enough ha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?"
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that  |
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By *azzle99Woman
over a year ago
Edinburgh |
Hate it when guys say I look beautiful/pretty etc when you can’t see any face pics, that’s a bigger eye roll than expecting an instant meet.
Love it when someone takes time to make it relevant to my profile name, has read between the lines and makes it relevant to me. That will always get a reply even if it’s a thanks but no thanks.
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"As I've said before, a message that shows that, without a shadow of a doubt they 100% have:
1) Read my profile
2) Match what my profile says I am looking for "
This and to not immediately assume because of number 2 I'm going to be waiting with my knickers round my ankles |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that "
Well if it's a first message I'd block him! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that "
Really? That’s an opening line? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"As I've said before, a message that shows that, without a shadow of a doubt they 100% have:
1) Read my profile
2) Match what my profile says I am looking for
This and to not immediately assume because of number 2 I'm going to be waiting with my knickers round my ankles "
Noted |
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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago
Coventry |
Everyone is different but for us personally a message should be with pics that are recent and they have read your profile first. Just a polite intro and genuine and honest from the start. |
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I like an interesting message. If they show something of themselves and aspects of their interests in me.
It's great to get a feel for someone as an individual. I don't want a formula that's obvious. I certainly don't want a micro effort 'hi' etc.
Men need realistic expectations and to behave accordingly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that
Well if it's a first message I'd block him! "
We do |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that
Really? That’s an opening line? "
That’s one of the better opening lines we receive |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I personally like,
1) a few tasteful pics, face & body.
2) a well written message that gives me something to respond to, ie, equal effort in conversation.
3) maybe one genuine compliment. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that
Really? That’s an opening line?
That’s one of the better opening lines we receive "
Delightful  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I personally like,
1) a few tasteful pics, face & body.
2) a well written message that gives me something to respond to, ie, equal effort in conversation.
3) maybe one genuine compliment. "
Makes sense I guess …. A mixture |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that
Really? That’s an opening line?
That’s one of the better opening lines we receive
Delightful "
Within minutes of that we just received a “suck and go” message |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always write a specific message to the profile I'm messaging, don't always get a response but least I know I have read their profile and messaged appropriately as long as I fit their criteria of course. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that
Really? That’s an opening line?
That’s one of the better opening lines we receive
Delightful
Within minutes of that we just received a “suck and go” message "
And of course you agreed to it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I always write a specific message to the profile I'm messaging, don't always get a response but least I know I have read their profile and messaged appropriately as long as I fit their criteria of course. "
Sounds good |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that
Really? That’s an opening line?
That’s one of the better opening lines we receive
Delightful
Within minutes of that we just received a “suck and go” message
And of course you agreed to it "
We’re at his house now |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"What do you like when it comes to getting messages ?
Do you like a guy to be direct? Do you like them to tell you about their experiences?
Do you want to k ow about them in the first message?
Keep it short and then go from there?
What’s people’s preference …. Couples & females let us know …
Just a couple of sentences. We don’t want a life story just something to show they’ve read our profile, a little about themselves and maybe a question that give us something to reply to. Avoid questions that can just have a yes/no answer or statements that don’t require an answer.
Spot on! The majority of the ones I get are of the "Can I tell you about my fantasy" "Love your profile" "Can we chat". What am I supposed to do with those?
Or “I’d love to eat your ass”… I don’t even know how to respond to that
Really? That’s an opening line?
That’s one of the better opening lines we receive
Delightful
Within minutes of that we just received a “suck and go” message
And of course you agreed to it
We’re at his house now "
Lucky guy …. ‘Takes self away to write great opening messages ‘…. |
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By *byeguysCouple (MM)
over a year ago
Paisley |
Any that show they have read our profile. We’re only really looking for women or m/f couples but the amount of messages from single guys who want threesomes shows that they rarely look beyond the top of the page. |
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There’s no winning formula but what doesn’t work is one liners, FaF, in your area today, cock pics attached, no pics or nothing in their profile, types.
If the message intrigues then we’ll open the profile and look at pics and what they’ve written.
It all goes hand in hand…first impressions count.
K |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There’s no winning formula but what doesn’t work is one liners, FaF, in your area today, cock pics attached, no pics or nothing in their profile, types.
If the message intrigues then we’ll open the profile and look at pics and what they’ve written.
It all goes hand in hand…first impressions count.
K"
It seems what should be the ‘givens’ are the go too… appreciate you take on it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"To say hi, what part of your profile they thought they'd matched with and questions they may have....something that actually requires a response and if there's banter too xT "
Not asking too much there |
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"Everyone is different but for us personally a message should be with pics that are recent and they have read your profile first. Just a polite intro and genuine and honest from the start."
This for sure |
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"Write to me like I'm a person, an individual that you like the look of. Not a set of holes with "nice tits". Humour is good."
Oh god, can't agree more with this!
I'll also add I don't do graphic sex talk, so anything of that sort will turn me straight off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't copy and paste ( that includes men who start the message with our names, but have clearly copy and pasted the rest)
READ OUR PROFILE
See if you are what we are looking for.
READ OUR PROFILE
See if we are actively looking for meets at that time.
READ OUR PROFILE
Don't automatically assume which one of us you are talking to.
READ OUR PROFILE
A brief introduction about yourself and see where we go from there.
Oh and READ OUR PROFILE. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Don't copy and paste ( that includes men who start the message with our names, but have clearly copy and pasted the rest)
READ OUR PROFILE
See if you are what we are looking for.
READ OUR PROFILE
See if we are actively looking for meets at that time.
READ OUR PROFILE
Don't automatically assume which one of us you are talking to.
READ OUR PROFILE
A brief introduction about yourself and see where we go from there.
Oh and READ OUR PROFILE."
Seems straight forward enough |
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To be honest, unless it's regarding a forum game, it doesn't really matter unless I find the sender attractive because I'm not even going to read it. If I do read it then it depends entirely on my mood, but a message that makes me laugh will generally get a reply. I don't ever really want to hear how gorgeous I am because I don't for one second believe that at least 95% of men on here aren't just throwing the same lines out to every woman and couple they message, and I take all compliments on here with a huge pinch of salt (how do you know I'm beautiful? I could have a face like a bag of spanners!) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I dont want War and Peace, just something light that shows a little of their personality.
Thats probably why I don't meet much, if they are just after a one off, they are unlikely to want to put the effort in. |
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Bit of humour, more than three words, nothing crude, a bit about the sender without an essay and some reflection of what is on my profile to show you have looked at who I am and not just chancing it…. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"To be honest, unless it's regarding a forum game, it doesn't really matter unless I find the sender attractive because I'm not even going to read it. If I do read it then it depends entirely on my mood, but a message that makes me laugh will generally get a reply. I don't ever really want to hear how gorgeous I am because I don't for one second believe that at least 95% of men on here aren't just throwing the same lines out to every woman and couple they message, and I take all compliments on here with a huge pinch of salt (how do you know I'm beautiful? I could have a face like a bag of spanners!) "
Well if the spanners are snap-on then they are beautiful :p |
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Or the ones that ask if I fancy being banged 
Overexposure to anything becomes boring as hell after a while.