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Self-Compassion for 2022!

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston

I believe that everybody should be kinder to themselves

I’ve been overweight and had body issues since I was about 5yrs old, although I want to lose some weight, I also want to stop feeling disgusted at myself over the extra lbs and my body shape

What do you want to cut yourself a little slack over for 2022?

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman  over a year ago

evesham

You don't look after things you don't love x love yourself and the self care will come x

I want to be able to know I am enough. I constantly worry things are going on behind my back and obsess that people don't like me and are always looking for better

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman  over a year ago

King's Crustacean

Best thread today.

Love thyself.... but in a good way.

Seriously people do not make enough time for themselves.

Great thread. x

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman  over a year ago

King's Crustacean


"You don't look after things you don't love x love yourself and the self care will come x

I want to be able to know I am enough. I constantly worry things are going on behind my back and obsess that people don't like me and are always looking for better "

I love you Evie x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You look fabulous lou, sending lots of positive vibes to reach your goal

Id love to love myself, and stop past choices & decisions ruining my life. I really would love to make this change and feel human again

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By *emorefridaCouple  over a year ago

La la land

Similar to you OP. Stop talking negatively about myself and my body. Start living for the now, not when I've lost x amount of weight.

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By *emorefridaCouple  over a year ago

La la land


"You look fabulous lou, sending lots of positive vibes to reach your goal

Id love to love myself, and stop past choices & decisions ruining my life. I really would love to make this change and feel human again "

Gatsby we all make shit decisions in life, don't beat yourself up none of us are perfect x

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"You don't look after things you don't love x love yourself and the self care will come x

I want to be able to know I am enough. I constantly worry things are going on behind my back and obsess that people don't like me and are always looking for better "

Ohh, I have so many issues! I’ll keep chipping away with the therapy!

I hope you can manage to achieve your goal, it sounds important x

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"Best thread today.

Love thyself.... but in a good way.

Seriously people do not make enough time for themselves.

Great thread. x"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" What do you want to cut yourself a little slack over for 2022?"

Try to not beat myself up about lack of friends and introversion.

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"You look fabulous lou, sending lots of positive vibes to reach your goal

Id love to love myself, and stop past choices & decisions ruining my life. I really would love to make this change and feel human again "

Thank you, those pics were all taken a stone ago, I’ve been avoiding the camera since!

A good starting place is to have a good think about what you need to be able to achieve what you want - I wish you lots of luck with it x

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"Similar to you OP. Stop talking negatively about myself and my body. Start living for the now, not when I've lost x amount of weight. "

Absolutely

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman  over a year ago

evesham


"You don't look after things you don't love x love yourself and the self care will come x

I want to be able to know I am enough. I constantly worry things are going on behind my back and obsess that people don't like me and are always looking for better

I love you Evie x "

Awwwww thanks granny x

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


" What do you want to cut yourself a little slack over for 2022?

Try to not beat myself up about lack of friends and introversion. "

I’m an introvert too, the world would be a very dull place if we were all the same. Wishing you all the best in accepting yourself

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Great idea op

I've been doing work on myself for a few years now.

I had 15 years of really bad luck that almost finished me off. But have spent the last 5 getting my shit together and I'm in a very good place now

Good luck all MM X

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" What do you want to cut yourself a little slack over for 2022?

Try to not beat myself up about lack of friends and introversion.

I’m an introvert too, the world would be a very dull place if we were all the same. Wishing you all the best in accepting yourself "

Thanks L. Hard to accept in the extrovert world in which we live xxx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Self care and self love are massively underrated.

It’s a good thing, and we should all realise that

Love this op

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple  over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight


"You don't look after things you don't love x love yourself and the self care will come x

I want to be able to know I am enough. I constantly worry things are going on behind my back and obsess that people don't like me and are always looking for better "

HNY, the only thing you have any influences on are the ones you have control over. Tell yourself you are great, if others don't share that pov then that is on them. For too long we've wasted time looking from approval of others, and they didn't give a monkeys anyway. This was the single most important message we gave our kids, they both have great lives with good people sharing it.

Happiness begins from within, and as if by magic, those feelings are picked up by likeminded souls and life becomes enjoyable.

Knockbacks are moments in time, not definitive states of perminant feelings. Have a great life.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

"

It makes me so sad that you feel like this . Can you start a gratitude journal, and start very small, and build up? It can be as small as “I’m grateful for my comfy bed’

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

"

I’m sorry to hear that, that all sounds overwhelming and upsetting, it can be hard to find self-compassion when you’re hearing all these things. My therapist gave me an exercise to do where every day you list what you did and then in the next column you put the positive personal qualities that shows you have e.g caring, reliable, honest etc. Maybe doing something like this would be helpful for you?

Also, happy birthday! Go and do something for yourself xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

yep its okay to recognize you need to work on things but without any slef love it will not get any better. Also nothing wrong with a bigger women as there is more to love.

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"Great idea op

I've been doing work on myself for a few years now.

I had 15 years of really bad luck that almost finished me off. But have spent the last 5 getting my shit together and I'm in a very good place now

Good luck all MM X"

Good for you! That makes me happy x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/01/22 10:20:36]

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


" What do you want to cut yourself a little slack over for 2022?

Try to not beat myself up about lack of friends and introversion.

I’m an introvert too, the world would be a very dull place if we were all the same. Wishing you all the best in accepting yourself

Thanks L. Hard to accept in the extrovert world in which we live xxx"

I’ve no idea if you’re a reader, but there’s a book by Susan Cain called ‘Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking’

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

"

Happy birthday.

It's not you that needs to change, it's the people or person saying this shit about you.

You deserve better. Xx

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By *elloIntrigueMan  over a year ago

North West UK

In support of this fully.

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"yep its okay to recognize you need to work on things but without any slef love it will not get any better. Also nothing wrong with a bigger women as there is more to love. "

It’s all tied up together! It’s not easy to wake up and decide you’re going to start loving yourself, if you don’t it’s usually pretty deep-rooted, but what you can do is wake up and decide to be kinder to yourself!

I absolutely agree there’s nothing wrong with bigger women, this is about being happy though. I’ve been quite a bit bigger than I am now and I know when I’m at my happiest and for me it’s when I’m lighter than I am now x

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"Self care and self love are massively underrated.

It’s a good thing, and we should all realise that

Love this op "

Absolutely!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" What do you want to cut yourself a little slack over for 2022?

Try to not beat myself up about lack of friends and introversion.

I’m an introvert too, the world would be a very dull place if we were all the same. Wishing you all the best in accepting yourself

Thanks L. Hard to accept in the extrovert world in which we live xxx

I’ve no idea if you’re a reader, but there’s a book by Susan Cain called ‘Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking’ "

Yes, I read that years ago - light bulb moment! x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You don't look after things you don't love x love yourself and the self care will come x

I want to be able to know I am enough. I constantly worry things are going on behind my back and obsess that people don't like me and are always looking for better "

All this for me too. I'm binning all my 'friends' and colleagues as they don't bring any good.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

Happy birthday.

It's not you that needs to change, it's the people or person saying this shit about you.

You deserve better. Xx"

Also, absolutely this. The problem isn’t you.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Love this and been working on this for the last year. There is some amazing books out there.

At moment listening to "know your worth" Anna Mathur, it's very good.

I keep a gratitude journal and fill it out most days.

You need to appreciate yourself to be able to accept appreciation, show yourself compassion to be able to accept compassion, I love the explanation why on a flight your told to put your oxygen mask on first you have to help yourself first if you want to help everyone else. It took me a long time to realise that, I spent so long been a people pleaser napkin sure everyone was happy and loved without giving myself the same level of love.

Sending you all hugs and love, we are all enough.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Great idea op

I've been doing work on myself for a few years now.

I had 15 years of really bad luck that almost finished me off. But have spent the last 5 getting my shit together and I'm in a very good place now

Good luck all MM X

Good for you! That makes me happy x"

Thank you that means a lot

I hope it all works out for you also x

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By *eliWoman  over a year ago

.

You're right OP, we should be kinder to ourselves. I hope that in the coming year you're able to show yourself the compassion and thought you've demonstrated in this thread.

In terms of slack cutting, yes, I'm going to continue losing weight but I'm also going to stop not living, feeling like I'm less than so shouldn't do x, y and z. I'm not getting any younger and might as well live rather than exist.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You can only control 2 things

1 what you put in your body

2 what you think of yourself

Thats it,so dont worry about everything else you have no control over x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

It makes me so sad that you feel like this . Can you start a gratitude journal, and start very small, and build up? It can be as small as “I’m grateful for my comfy bed’"

Thank you i will do that xx

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By *evil-AngelWoman  over a year ago

...


"I believe that everybody should be kinder to themselves

I’ve been overweight and had body issues since I was about 5yrs old, although I want to lose some weight, I also want to stop feeling disgusted at myself over the extra lbs and my body shape

What do you want to cut yourself a little slack over for 2022?"

I think I need to treat myself how I treat others. I'm always willing to see the good in other people and give them the benefit of the doubt when they mess up. I struggle to do this myself though, I'm very critical of the things I do.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

I’m sorry to hear that, that all sounds overwhelming and upsetting, it can be hard to find self-compassion when you’re hearing all these things. My therapist gave me an exercise to do where every day you list what you did and then in the next column you put the positive personal qualities that shows you have e.g caring, reliable, honest etc. Maybe doing something like this would be helpful for you?

Also, happy birthday! Go and do something for yourself xx"

Thank you, i will do that xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

Happy birthday.

It's not you that needs to change, it's the people or person saying this shit about you.

You deserve better. Xx"

Thank you xx

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"You don't look after things you don't love x love yourself and the self care will come x

I want to be able to know I am enough. I constantly worry things are going on behind my back and obsess that people don't like me and are always looking for better

All this for me too. I'm binning all my 'friends' and colleagues as they don't bring any good."

I hope you manage to find some peace in doing this x

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"Love this and been working on this for the last year. There is some amazing books out there.

At moment listening to "know your worth" Anna Mathur, it's very good.

I keep a gratitude journal and fill it out most days.

You need to appreciate yourself to be able to accept appreciation, show yourself compassion to be able to accept compassion, I love the explanation why on a flight your told to put your oxygen mask on first you have to help yourself first if you want to help everyone else. It took me a long time to realise that, I spent so long been a people pleaser napkin sure everyone was happy and loved without giving myself the same level of love.

Sending you all hugs and love, we are all enough.

"

Fabulous! I’ve heard the oxygen mask analogy before, it’s spot on

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"You're right OP, we should be kinder to ourselves. I hope that in the coming year you're able to show yourself the compassion and thought you've demonstrated in this thread.

In terms of slack cutting, yes, I'm going to continue losing weight but I'm also going to stop not living, feeling like I'm less than so shouldn't do x, y and z. I'm not getting any younger and might as well live rather than exist."

Thank you! And good luck, that’s absolutely the right way to think

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

"

Happy Birthday! Tell your hubby to stop being an arse - it's your birthday ffs.

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"I believe that everybody should be kinder to themselves

I’ve been overweight and had body issues since I was about 5yrs old, although I want to lose some weight, I also want to stop feeling disgusted at myself over the extra lbs and my body shape

What do you want to cut yourself a little slack over for 2022?

I think I need to treat myself how I treat others. I'm always willing to see the good in other people and give them the benefit of the doubt when they mess up. I struggle to do this myself though, I'm very critical of the things I do."

It’s so much harder to do it for ourselves isn’t it?! I wish you lots of luck x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Love this and been working on this for the last year. There is some amazing books out there.

At moment listening to "know your worth" Anna Mathur, it's very good.

I keep a gratitude journal and fill it out most days.

You need to appreciate yourself to be able to accept appreciation, show yourself compassion to be able to accept compassion, I love the explanation why on a flight your told to put your oxygen mask on first you have to help yourself first if you want to help everyone else. It took me a long time to realise that, I spent so long been a people pleaser napkin sure everyone was happy and loved without giving myself the same level of love.

Sending you all hugs and love, we are all enough.

Fabulous! I’ve heard the oxygen mask analogy before, it’s spot on "

I love that one, and also ‘you can’t fill from an empty cup’

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

"

have you ever stopped to think that the people around you are the crap 1s. Instead of helping and support you all they do is put you down

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By *a LunaWoman  over a year ago

South

I’m going to try and stop being a worrier and to just chill the fuck out and smile more, to focus on the here and now and not worry about what the future may hold. I’m going to try and be more healthy and more sensible with my money and try and save a bit more.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

Happy Birthday! Tell your hubby to stop being an arse - it's your birthday ffs. "

Will do x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

have you ever stopped to think that the people around you are the crap 1s. Instead of helping and support you all they do is put you down"

I need to change my thinking x

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By *nfin8yWoman  over a year ago

Newcastle-under-Lyme


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

"

It’s no surprise you find it difficult to be positive when you are constantly being told all these negative things. It sounds like quite a toxic environment to be in to the point where you start to believe in these things yourself. But just because you are told these things doesn’t make it so.

Have a Happy Birthday. Take time out for You. Do something You enjoy for yourself, by yourself. You deserve it. Be with people who value you. Not just today, but every day. Just one thing to nurture you. Xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

It’s no surprise you find it difficult to be positive when you are constantly being told all these negative things. It sounds like quite a toxic environment to be in to the point where you start to believe in these things yourself. But just because you are told these things doesn’t make it so.

Have a Happy Birthday. Take time out for You. Do something You enjoy for yourself, by yourself. You deserve it. Be with people who value you. Not just today, but every day. Just one thing to nurture you. Xx"

Thank you, i will xx

I've just had a game of hungry hippos with my grandson (he's not the one that thinks I'm a bad grandmother), it's cheered me up, as have the lovely thoughts and messages here xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I want to say thank you to all the kind people who reached out to me. I am in a much better state of mind now. Thank you xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I want to try and stop worrying about what people think , even people I don’t even know..

But it’s a hard thing to break after doing it most my life…

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think for me, it's feeling worthy regardless of what some others may think.

Only yesterday I was told that having untidy lazy teenagers is not something they could ever live with.

Well, they might be that but they are kind, good people and I'd rather have their laziness than be without them.

If people cannot see the good in yourselves or others, then what's the point in letting it get to you?

That's their issue, not yours

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I agree their issue not yours , easy to say not so easy to do

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I agree their issue not yours , easy to say not so easy to do "

It's not and it does hurt but then I'd rather be happy knowing you can't be everything to everyone but out there, someone will appreciate you, even if it is your mum

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I want to stop myself from overthinking so much. I'm always worried about offending people and saying sorry all the time. Most of the time I'm okay but every once in a while my brain goes into overdrive!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Stop overthinking and worrying what people think if me.

Im quiet a shy person, introvert, but when u know me, im far from it. So many folk judge me for being quiet and i get left out.

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"I want to say thank you to all the kind people who reached out to me. I am in a much better state of mind now. Thank you xx"

This is good news

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"I want to try and stop worrying about what people think , even people I don’t even know..

But it’s a hard thing to break after doing it most my life… "

It’s difficult but not impossible! Good luck x

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"I think for me, it's feeling worthy regardless of what some others may think.

Only yesterday I was told that having untidy lazy teenagers is not something they could ever live with.

Well, they might be that but they are kind, good people and I'd rather have their laziness than be without them.

If people cannot see the good in yourselves or others, then what's the point in letting it get to you?

That's their issue, not yours "

Completely! People only project out what’s going on inside them x

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"I want to stop myself from overthinking so much. I'm always worried about offending people and saying sorry all the time. Most of the time I'm okay but every once in a while my brain goes into overdrive!!! "

I’ve been trying to stop apologising for myself too! It helps that I’m training to be a counsellor and my tutor doesn’t let me get away with it!

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"Stop overthinking and worrying what people think if me.

Im quiet a shy person, introvert, but when u know me, im far from it. So many folk judge me for being quiet and i get left out.

"

I hope you can manage to do that for yourself x

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By *elloIntrigueMan  over a year ago

North West UK


"I want to say thank you to all the kind people who reached out to me. I am in a much better state of mind now. Thank you xx"

I am so glad to hear it

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By *elloIntrigueMan  over a year ago

North West UK


"I want to stop myself from overthinking so much. I'm always worried about offending people and saying sorry all the time. Most of the time I'm okay but every once in a while my brain goes into overdrive!!!

I’ve been trying to stop apologising for myself too! It helps that I’m training to be a counsellor and my tutor doesn’t let me get away with it! "

Hope that training goes well for you Lou

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"I want to stop myself from overthinking so much. I'm always worried about offending people and saying sorry all the time. Most of the time I'm okay but every once in a while my brain goes into overdrive!!!

I’ve been trying to stop apologising for myself too! It helps that I’m training to be a counsellor and my tutor doesn’t let me get away with it!

Hope that training goes well for you Lou "

Thanks! I’m loving it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm planning to be kinder to myself too.

I'm having to remind myself of it a lot.

It means reminding myself to put me first and that it's OK to do that.

It means allowing myself to want more to believe I deserve more.

It means placing value on myself rather than seeking it from others.

It means setting boundaries and not compromising for the sake of it because its expected of me.

And its meaning working to stop some really damaging habits and ending some toxic relationships. X

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I’m seeing myself in a whole different way these days. A way that I haven’t realised before. I’m embracing that.

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"I'm planning to be kinder to myself too.

I'm having to remind myself of it a lot.

It means reminding myself to put me first and that it's OK to do that.

It means allowing myself to want more to believe I deserve more.

It means placing value on myself rather than seeking it from others.

It means setting boundaries and not compromising for the sake of it because its expected of me.

And its meaning working to stop some really damaging habits and ending some toxic relationships. X"

It’s good you’ve recognised what you need to do. Good luck! x

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By *tarflyLou OP   Woman  over a year ago

Preston


"I’m seeing myself in a whole different way these days. A way that I haven’t realised before. I’m embracing that.

"

Good for you! x

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By *nfin8yWoman  over a year ago

Newcastle-under-Lyme


"I find it impossible to be positive about myself in any way.

I'm told i don't work well enough.

I'm told my ill health is caused by being fat, a bad diet and being a hypocondriac (can't spell it)

I'm told I'm a bad mother, sister, grandmother.

I'm told I'm a crap cook and crap at looking after the house and garden.

It now appears that I'm a crap wife too, it's my birthday today, hubby didn't bother to wrap my present, although at least he had bought me one, when i sat to open cards and presents he didn't bother to sit with me, he stayed in a different room.

It’s no surprise you find it difficult to be positive when you are constantly being told all these negative things. It sounds like quite a toxic environment to be in to the point where you start to believe in these things yourself. But just because you are told these things doesn’t make it so.

Have a Happy Birthday. Take time out for You. Do something You enjoy for yourself, by yourself. You deserve it. Be with people who value you. Not just today, but every day. Just one thing to nurture you. Xx

Thank you, i will xx

I've just had a game of hungry hippos with my grandson (he's not the one that thinks I'm a bad grandmother), it's cheered me up, as have the lovely thoughts and messages here xx"

That’s great. Being with my grandson always gives me a lift up too. Be kind to yourself and do something positive for you every day. All the best xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm planning to be kinder to myself too.

I'm having to remind myself of it a lot.

It means reminding myself to put me first and that it's OK to do that.

It means allowing myself to want more to believe I deserve more.

It means placing value on myself rather than seeking it from others.

It means setting boundaries and not compromising for the sake of it because its expected of me.

And its meaning working to stop some really damaging habits and ending some toxic relationships. X"

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