FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Adulting…. did you ever think??
Adulting…. did you ever think??
Jump to: Newest in thread
 | |||
| |||
| |||
 | |||
  | |||
 | |||
| |||
| |||
LvM | |||
 | |||
| |||
"Do what we did and have children nearly 15 yrs apart in age. Absolutely zero time in private "I trump you on that.., kids age 13-22 I spent literally 15 yrs at the school gates! 
At one point I had 4 separate nativities//carol services! :l | |||
| |||
"One of many reasons we're not planning to have kids
LvM"The sensible ones!! | |||
"Actually, that's not quite true for me. However , you can guarantee I want to take a phone call and every bugger wants me "Or go for a shower | |||
"Actually, that's not quite true for me. However , you can guarantee I want to take a phone call and every bugger wants me "Yep any phone call is usually overheard by the masses regardless how late at night! | |||
| |||
"I completely feel you! My youngest moved back after the breakup of a long term relationship. His daughter, my granddaughter has a home here for half of the week. My eldest is always around...he likes us to catch a film. My daughter and her family...one son, my grandson and they are here often. I have an open door. My little house was once tidy and quiet. Now it is chaos and full of life. I have no space of my own and if I want some I have to plan it and kick the youngest out for the night. I may have no space but I do have a caring family who would do anything for me. I do though look forward to having my house back, soon. " Yeah but you can kick them out for the evening if needed! | |||
"Four teens here and not only is there is there always one or more around, they eat ALL the food. "Don't get me started on empty packets put back in the cupboard... | |||
"Do what we did and have children nearly 15 yrs apart in age. Absolutely zero time in private
I trump you on that.., kids age 13-22 I spent literally 15 yrs at the school gates!
At one point I had 4 separate nativities//carol services! :l "Our 19yo son is nocturnal and since he's moved home, it's back to stuffing pillows over one's face at critical moments 
Fuck knows if he recognises the sound of a belt hitting flesh too | |||
"Four teens here and not only is there is there always one or more around, they eat ALL the food. "I did have four at home at one point & the food consumption was huge!! Down to 2 now thankfully! | |||
"Do what we did and have children nearly 15 yrs apart in age. Absolutely zero time in private
I trump you on that.., kids age 13-22 I spent literally 15 yrs at the school gates!
At one point I had 4 separate nativities//carol services! :l
Our 19yo son is nocturnal and since he's moved home, it's back to stuffing pillows over one's face at critical moments
Fuck knows if he recognises the sound of a belt hitting flesh too "My walls are paper thin.. plus I’m not in an established relationship..makes life tricky! | |||
"Four teens here and not only is there is there always one or more around, they eat ALL the food.
Don't get me started on empty packets put back in the cupboard... "The smallest amount of squash left in a bottle is my sons expertise… | |||
| |||
"Four teens here and not only is there is there always one or more around, they eat ALL the food.
Don't get me started on empty packets put back in the cupboard... "The rage!  | |||
"Four teens here and not only is there is there always one or more around, they eat ALL the food.
I did have four at home at one point & the food consumption was huge!!
Down to 2 now thankfully!"I love them dearly but sometimes I want to scream. | |||
"Four teens here and not only is there is there always one or more around, they eat ALL the food.
Don't get me started on empty packets put back in the cupboard...
The rage! "Its real isn't it ?? | |||
"I completely feel you! My youngest moved back after the breakup of a long term relationship. His daughter, my granddaughter has a home here for half of the week. My eldest is always around...he likes us to catch a film. My daughter and her family...one son, my grandson and they are here often. I have an open door. My little house was once tidy and quiet. Now it is chaos and full of life. I have no space of my own and if I want some I have to plan it and kick the youngest out for the night. I may have no space but I do have a caring family who would do anything for me. I do though look forward to having my house back, soon. Yeah but you can kick them out for the evening if needed! "Yes...my granddaughter is not here till a Sunday so I kick the youngest out for the night and ban the others...it works | |||
| |||
"I blame the parents "Me too | |||
"I blame the parents "Yep… we’re all slatterns | |||
"I blame the parents
Yep… we’re all slatterns "Including Mr M. ESPECIALLY Mr M | |||
| |||
"That becoming an adult.. owning your own home would result in you Never Having Free Time and Privacy ever again! So.., more for us full time single parents… did you ever imagine you would have so little free time! My kids are teens.. it’s supposed to be easier.. but fuck me. They Are Always At Home!! At least when they were little they went to bed at 7pm! Teen one.. has her boyfriend round.. they decamp to her room and I give them space… Teen 2, homebird loves for us to sit & watch films… I love my kids dearly but ffs…I would love to have time in my own house to kinda do fun stuff that grown ups do! Lighthearted as I know parenting is a privilege but sometimes…., "ah the old issues of being a parent. You will 100% miss them though when they all leave the nest. In the meantime you have to options 1) bribe them with money to go out and not return till day after. 2) send them there dads for weekend | |||
"I can totally relate! And why do mine have to be such homebodies?! I am literally never shot of the buggers "I was never at home as a teen.. I wanted to be the furthest away from my parents as I could be. We’ve taken parenting to a new level.. the buggers like is too much! | |||
| |||
And yes they eat EVERYTHING and ours are old enough to drink everything too lol
Love them too but omg for a bit of empty house time
x
| |||
"Haha! Yep, I get this. Though this coming year I'll be getting a place of my own and only seeing the kids every other week. It'll be great having my own space, but I'll miss the little fuckers like crazy at the same time. " Yeah every other week… you still get a week to yourself though! | |||
"Haha! Yep, I get this. Though this coming year I'll be getting a place of my own and only seeing the kids every other week. It'll be great having my own space, but I'll miss the little fuckers like crazy at the same time. " It’s chaos when both mine are here and I’m pulling my hair out. But as soon as they go back to their mums I sit there and miss them like mad… it’s like a weird reversed Stockholm syndrome!  | |||
"That becoming an adult.. owning your own home would result in you Never Having Free Time and Privacy ever again! So.., more for us full time single parents… did you ever imagine you would have so little free time! My kids are teens.. it’s supposed to be easier.. but fuck me. They Are Always At Home!! At least when they were little they went to bed at 7pm! Teen one.. has her boyfriend round.. they decamp to her room and I give them space… Teen 2, homebird loves for us to sit & watch films… I love my kids dearly but ffs…I would love to have time in my own house to kinda do fun stuff that grown ups do! Lighthearted as I know parenting is a privilege but sometimes…., ah the old issues of being a parent. You will 100% miss them though when they all leave the nest. In the meantime you have to options
1) bribe them with money to go out and not return till day after.
2) send them there dads for weekend "Under item 2, what do you do when "their dad's" is the same place you are?! Do we send 'em out the front and back in the back?! Send Help | |||
"… and they kid you about how long they’ll be out so you get all giddy with the things you’re doing … ahem … then their key jangles in the lock soooo much earlier than you thought it would and you look at each other like shiiiiit
And yes they eat EVERYTHING and ours are old enough to drink everything too lol
Love them too but omg for a bit of empty house time
x
Ha ha .. it really is like ffs fuck off!! We love you dearly but…..
" | |||
I know kids are a blessing and I’m u love em but listening to this I’m glad I don’t have one
Or any that “I know” of  | |||
"I hunk you should’ve swallowed instead Jokes
I know kids are a blessing and I’m u love em but listening to this I’m glad I don’t have one
Or any that “I know” of "I think* you should have swallowed (Had to correct that to make it and sense lol) | |||
| |||
"That becoming an adult.. owning your own home would result in you Never Having Free Time and Privacy ever again! So.., more for us full time single parents… did you ever imagine you would have so little free time! My kids are teens.. it’s supposed to be easier.. but fuck me. They Are Always At Home!! At least when they were little they went to bed at 7pm! Teen one.. has her boyfriend round.. they decamp to her room and I give them space… Teen 2, homebird loves for us to sit & watch films… I love my kids dearly but ffs…I would love to have time in my own house to kinda do fun stuff that grown ups do! Lighthearted as I know parenting is a privilege but sometimes…., ah the old issues of being a parent. You will 100% miss them though when they all leave the nest. In the meantime you have to options
1) bribe them with money to go out and not return till day after.
2) send them there dads for weekend
Under item 2, what do you do when "their dad's" is the same place you are?! Do we send 'em out the front and back in the back?!
Send
Help
"oh yeh I never thought of that , you will have to excuse me for my scatterbrain its late | |||
| |||
 | |||
| |||
"I can totally relate! And why do mine have to be such homebodies?! I am literally never shot of the buggers
I was never at home as a teen.. I wanted to be the furthest away from my parents as I could be.
We’ve taken parenting to a new level.. the buggers like is too much! "This is very true I believe that the norm is for kids to stay at home much longer particularly guys. I know of some parents with 30 year olds still at home - wtf! | |||
| |||
| |||
"I can totally relate! And why do mine have to be such homebodies?! I am literally never shot of the buggers
I was never at home as a teen.. I wanted to be the furthest away from my parents as I could be.
We’ve taken parenting to a new level.. the buggers like is too much!
This is very true I believe that the norm is for kids to stay at home much longer particularly guys.
I know of some parents with 30 year olds still at home - wtf! "Oh god. My 23 Yr old has just moved back home. Will I ever get some "me time" again? Hotels are going to make a mint out of me. | |||
| |||
| |||
"I always said Dogs are easier than kids.......they give u unconditional love without the college fees
"Kids don’t shit in the garden though | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"I always said Dogs are easier than kids.......they give u unconditional love without the college fees
Kids don’t shit in the garden though" | |||
"I always said Dogs are easier than kids.......they give u unconditional love without the college fees
Kids don’t shit in the garden though" | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
 | |||
"The bins go out more often than my teen so I’m in the same boat. A trip to Chams usually helps, partly because of the obvious but also because it’s a whole period of time with my phone in a locker. Total me time" I’m with you on that.. Chams is the place I get some free time and it’s way cheaper than a hotel! | |||
"This is why I have dual lives Weekdays are family time and weekends are my time to play" I only get 2 weekends a month and lately it seems disasters befall those & kids need me. | |||
"Haha! Yep, I get this. Though this coming year I'll be getting a place of my own and only seeing the kids every other week. It'll be great having my own space, but I'll miss the little fuckers like crazy at the same time. Yeah every other week… you still get a week to yourself though!" In the 15 years of having kids, I've only been away for them for a week once. That was the week before this Xmas. Before that I hardly had anytime away as I had no family willing to babysit. It was definitely odd and will take a while to get used to, but I need to make sure I fill the time. | |||
"This is why I have dual lives Weekdays are family time and weekends are my time to play I only get 2 weekends a month and lately it seems disasters befall those & kids need me." I don't get any weekends. Won't stay with their dad.  | |||
"This is why I have dual lives Weekdays are family time and weekends are my time to play I only get 2 weekends a month and lately it seems disasters befall those & kids need me. I don't get any weekends. Won't stay with their dad. "Oh that sucks.. mine don’t like going to their Dads but at least they do actually go 2 weekends a month. | |||
| |||
"This is why I have dual lives Weekdays are family time and weekends are my time to play I only get 2 weekends a month and lately it seems disasters befall those & kids need me. I don't get any weekends. Won't stay with their dad.
Oh that sucks.. mine don’t like going to their Dads but at least they do actually go 2 weekends a month.
"I used to have 2 days a week free but they're old enough to choose and I won't force them. It's a sad situation though. | |||
| |||
Must be my cooking! | |||
| |||
"you will get privacy again, give it ten years or so "We have been saying that for the last 40 years. We have 3 boys all in their mid to late 30s all who drop "home" any time the choose. Two of them even manage to drop in to our holiday home 260 miles away when we are there. Privacy finishes with pregnancy!! | |||
 | |||
"At 20 years of age my Daughter has a five year plan to carry on living here
Must be my cooking!"Scary thought, five more years! | |||
| |||
| |||
"Don't have kids if you want privacy. Lol pretty simple really you all chose to have kids " I didn't choose to be a single mum with an ex our kids won't see. Cheers | |||
| |||
"One of them situations where you're going to miss them when they're gone! I need my alone time. I'd go crazy without it. " I used to think so but ...you just readjust and cope. Find space in little increments rather than full days or weekends. | |||
| |||
"I can totally relate! And why do mine have to be such homebodies?! I am literally never shot of the buggers
I was never at home as a teen.. I wanted to be the furthest away from my parents as I could be.
We’ve taken parenting to a new level.. the buggers like is too much!
This is very true I believe that the norm is for kids to stay at home much longer particularly guys.
I know of some parents with 30 year olds still at home - wtf! "Ha. My brother will be 40 next year and still lives with my parents. And for those saying that kids don't poo in the garden like dogs, you've clearly never done potty training during the summer. At least the swarming flies give it away as to where to clean up | |||
"I can totally relate! And why do mine have to be such homebodies?! I am literally never shot of the buggers
I was never at home as a teen.. I wanted to be the furthest away from my parents as I could be.
We’ve taken parenting to a new level.. the buggers like is too much!
This is very true I believe that the norm is for kids to stay at home much longer particularly guys.
I know of some parents with 30 year olds still at home - wtf! "Jesus Christ. This scares me now. I have 2 boys aged 3 and 7 and it's so hard to get any me-time, the youngest even sleeps with me!! Was hoping it might get easier but this thread has killed all hope | |||
"I can totally relate! And why do mine have to be such homebodies?! I am literally never shot of the buggers
I was never at home as a teen.. I wanted to be the furthest away from my parents as I could be.
We’ve taken parenting to a new level.. the buggers like is too much!
This is very true I believe that the norm is for kids to stay at home much longer particularly guys.
I know of some parents with 30 year olds still at home - wtf!
Jesus Christ. This scares me now. I have 2 boys aged 3 and 7 and it's so hard to get any me-time, the youngest even sleeps with me!! Was hoping it might get easier but this thread has killed all hope "This thread is frightening the shit out of me as well. I plan on working hard enough to just give him a flat when he turns 18 and he can bugger off then | |||
"I feel now like I'm living the life I did as a teenager but in reverse. Back then I was trying to find opportunities whenever I could and hide my shenanigans from my parents. Now. I'm the parent doing the same thing but hiding from my teenagers. "This.. it’s exactly how it is! | |||
| |||
"I feel now like I'm living the life I did as a teenager but in reverse. Back then I was trying to find opportunities whenever I could and hide my shenanigans from my parents. Now. I'm the parent doing the same thing but hiding from my teenagers.
This.. it’s exactly how it is!
"My wife and I have to keep the noise down... It's tough! | |||
"… and they kid you about how long they’ll be out so you get all giddy with the things you’re doing … ahem … then their key jangles in the lock soooo much earlier than you thought it would and you look at each other like shiiiiit
And yes they eat EVERYTHING and ours are old enough to drink everything too lol
Love them too but omg for a bit of empty house time
x
"Omg yes... The key in the door! Strikes fear into your heart. I had a lovely time planned while mine was at work, only to get a call saying he was coming home as it had only been staff training. Luckily we were still in the pub at that point. So had to change locations! | |||
"Don't have kids if you want privacy. Lol pretty simple really you all chose to have kids " Wow... | |||
"Ha ha I was only thinking this yesterday.... It was much easier when my son was little and I could send him to Grandma's for the weekend! Currently home from uni for a month.... So that's all my fun out the window. I do love him really and am very proud of him. " You can love him from afar
Thats our plan | |||
"Ha ha I was only thinking this yesterday.... It was much easier when my son was little and I could send him to Grandma's for the weekend! Currently home from uni for a month.... So that's all my fun out the window. I do love him really and am very proud of him. You can love him from afar
Thats our plan"Make sure they go far enough away not to want to come home every birthday/half term/holiday | |||
| |||
| |||
"I feel now like I'm living the life I did as a teenager but in reverse. Back then I was trying to find opportunities whenever I could and hide my shenanigans from my parents. Now. I'm the parent doing the same thing but hiding from my teenagers. " | |||
Don't worry - we wouldn't be without the kids. One reason we don't really do many meets. It takes alot of planning to have them both looked after and a house/dog sitter if we go away. I'm seeing this as an opportunity to get to know people, research and learn | |||
| |||
"[adulthood Removed by poster at 30/12/21 12:08:04]" | |||
| |||
 | |||
| |||
"This year I sat eating a pasta dish with Ben on Christmas day, with a wry smile on my face. Couldn't be arsed to do the usual fare. I was reflecting on Christmas's past: my daughters and their husbands, noise and mayhem, way too much food and booze, my day starting at 4am when I put the turkey on, dreaming of the day when they had kids and stayed in their own homes so I could have some me time. Guess what? I now have what I wanted, me time in abundance. Can't even do the tour of visiting my kids and have them fuss over me because of covid. Be careful what you wish... " | |||
"I feel now like I'm living the life I did as a teenager but in reverse. Back then I was trying to find opportunities whenever I could and hide my shenanigans from my parents. Now. I'm the parent doing the same thing but hiding from my teenagers. "give it time and they'll be feeding you and changing you.
| |||
| |||
"I feel now like I'm living the life I did as a teenager but in reverse. Back then I was trying to find opportunities whenever I could and hide my shenanigans from my parents. Now. I'm the parent doing the same thing but hiding from my teenagers. give it time and they'll be feeding you and changing you.
"I hope you are right. At the moment they are more like the don't carers more than carers | |||
| |||
| |||
"I feel now like I'm living the life I did as a teenager but in reverse. Back then I was trying to find opportunities whenever I could and hide my shenanigans from my parents. Now. I'm the parent doing the same thing but hiding from my teenagers. give it time and they'll be feeding you and changing you.
I hope you are right. At the moment they are more like the don't carers more than carers "it might be their last opportunity to get revenge or rewarded for sending them to The Trunchbol or Merry Poppins as their formative years exposure levels are gauged. And if you've had a pre-school child minder, you've no chance packed away in a nursing home. They're gonna say f*** The money, just as they wished you had as the little darling wished you had back in the day. | |||
"Don't have kids if you want privacy. Lol pretty simple really you all chose to have kids " Not true, B was on the pill with all three and never missed taking it ontime | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"Don't have kids if you want privacy. Lol pretty simple really you all chose to have kids I didn't choose to be a single mum with an ex our kids won't see. Cheers "Snap, three tines a year he sees them and I get some me time | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"As you get older it does get easier. It really helped me with advice from Mum and Dad when I got my own place and started 'adulting'." As we’ve grown older and the family matured often reflected on how little schools prepare for adulthood. The Rs and science etc are all well covered - but unless things have changed there’s not a great deal on the practical that help; how much kids cost to raise, planning, contingency and unforeseen, how tax consequences, how tax system works, avoiding dept and saving and investing etc. So many tips that some are fortunate to receive from parents, but should really be imparted to all through education. | |||
| |||
"Perhaps from a different point of view . No kids of my own. Been married twice. First wife had daughter. We spilt after five years. As she decided , no more children . Second wife due to age could not conceive . My biggest regret . Not having a child / children of own. Yes seen friends and like others have said in previous posts . Can be problem? I would swap places for that . "The OP did make it clear her "complaint" was intended to be taken light heartedly and sure she does understand that for people such as yourself, you might have liked the chance to have no child-free days. We hope you have managed to find peace and satisfaction out of life, despite the fact that children haven't featured for you. | |||
| |||
"As you get older it does get easier. It really helped me with advice from Mum and Dad when I got my own place and started 'adulting'. As we’ve grown older and the family matured often reflected on how little schools prepare for adulthood. The Rs and science etc are all well covered - but unless things have changed there’s not a great deal on the practical that help; how much kids cost to raise, planning, contingency and unforeseen, how tax consequences, how tax system works, avoiding dept and saving and investing etc. So many tips that some are fortunate to receive from parents, but should really be imparted to all through education. " Would you really want some clueless straight out of uni teacher ,trying to teach your kids about life? What do they know? That’s the parents job | |||
"As you get older it does get easier. It really helped me with advice from Mum and Dad when I got my own place and started 'adulting'. As we’ve grown older and the family matured often reflected on how little schools prepare for adulthood. The Rs and science etc are all well covered - but unless things have changed there’s not a great deal on the practical that help; how much kids cost to raise, planning, contingency and unforeseen, how tax consequences, how tax system works, avoiding dept and saving and investing etc. So many tips that some are fortunate to receive from parents, but should really be imparted to all through education. Would you really want some clueless straight out of uni teacher ,trying to teach your kids about life? What do they know? That’s the parents job " I agree it is the parents job. But not all parents are equipped with the knowledge themselves, or even if they are; might not have the time or inclination to teach it. And not all teachers are “fresh out of uni” - though I must say the ones that I’ve dealt with who are in their probationary period are very dedicated and more than capable of teaching such a curriculum which may have been prepared with the experience of more mature academics to develop the materials and content, much the same as any subject. (The do teach this stuff in a lot of private schools btw) | |||
"Don't have kids if you want privacy. Lol pretty simple really you all chose to have kids I didn't choose to be a single mum with an ex our kids won't see. Cheers
Snap, three tines a year he sees them and I get some me time"I don't even get that! Mine fucked off to the far side of the world. He seen them at Christmas for the first time in 2 and a half years. I also didn't choose or ever want to become a single mum | |||
| |||
"That becoming an adult.. owning your own home would result in you Never Having Free Time and Privacy ever again! So.., more for us full time single parents… did you ever imagine you would have so little free time! My kids are teens.. it’s supposed to be easier.. but fuck me. They Are Always At Home!! At least when they were little they went to bed at 7pm! Teen one.. has her boyfriend round.. they decamp to her room and I give them space… Teen 2, homebird loves for us to sit & watch films… I love my kids dearly but ffs…I would love to have time in my own house to kinda do fun stuff that grown ups do! Lighthearted as I know parenting is a privilege but sometimes…., "I hear ya ! It drives me insane the lack of privacy , personal space and silence . we need a private bolt hole flat where you know the toilet will always be clean , the bed made and no interruptions ! | |||
"I feel now like I'm living the life I did as a teenager but in reverse. Back then I was trying to find opportunities whenever I could and hide my shenanigans from my parents. Now. I'm the parent doing the same thing but hiding from my teenagers. "This | |||
| |||
