FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Should i tell my new girlfriend
Should i tell my new girlfriend
Jump to: Newest in thread
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
I always advocate for honesty in a relationship, so yes you should definitely tell her. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You probably should be honest about everything, including your profile on here.
Deception and lies will kill any potential relationship faster than anything else"
Agree
NBVN x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
Maybe hide profile on here and just focus on what's happening with her. If it looks like it's going somewhere then you can decide how you'll tell her. Not advocating deceit but rather either you give it a real go with her or not. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes you should.
Isn’t that obvious? ide stop this but would like tell her about my past..she might run a mile "
Or tell you she is also bi? If she is right for you then she won't run a mile. If she isn't then better to know now. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes you should.
Isn’t that obvious? ide stop this but would like tell her about my past..she might run a mile "
A new girlfriend probably won't want to know of your past sexual exploits |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Absolutely tell her, so misleading otherwise and what if it’s something that’s an issue for her then it’s something already started under a false pretence, I’ve zero time for that. Be upfront x"
Ditto |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Actually kind of shocking this is a legitimate question, just saying, not attacking the OP, but these are reasons people have trust issues and prefer having nsa sex |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Actually kind of shocking this is a legitimate question, just saying, not attacking the OP, but these are reasons people have trust issues and prefer having nsa sex" i know what you mean i would stop this activity..not that much happens lol..but ide like be honest with her..just scared she will run a mile
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"yes 100% your be surprised how many women are sexually open about things
as long as your safe and honest I can't see it being a issue x "
I mean if she freaks out at least you know now and it saves the lies |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Your fondness for cock will hardly go way just because you've met a new woman. It's up to you obviously lots of males on here like cock and also have a female partner who is unaware.
Unless you've walked in their shoes it's far too easy to say yes be honest. Honesty isn't always the best policy, playing safe and respecting yourself is.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"yes 100% your be surprised how many women are sexually open about things
as long as your safe and honest I can't see it being a issue x
I mean if she freaks out at least you know now and it saves the lies " thanks yes true.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
Yes
Don't be scared of being you
A life half led isn't one I'd advocate
If it turns her off, find someone who will roll with it or even promote it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Well your profile says that you're looking for a match
Do you think this person could be a long term thing ?
If it's not going anywhere then why bother but if you think it could be more then definitely tell her, if she's cool with it then either tell her about fab also or quit this and hopefully have a great life |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
I think with a brand new relationship it’s up to you both how much you reveal and when about your kinks, fetishes,,sexuality, hobbies,, political views and anything that’s YOUR business, you might not want to download it all on the first date.
But if you’re having sex or thinking of having sex with others, I think you should tell her it’s non monogamous, assuming she doesn’t know isn’t poly etc. But whether it’s with men or women , if you think it’s relevant or not
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *.D.I.D.A.SMan
over a year ago
London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact |
"Yes you should.
Isn’t that obvious? "
Yeah I never really understand these threads sometimes where there only appears to be one type of reasonable reply.
Hmmm... No, don't tell her, it's your business. Hmmm, perhaps surprise her with it one day further down the line. Actually out of sight out of mind.
OK, tell her I guess. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Yes be honest it's not fair on her if you're not. Your status suggests she's not the one or you would have hidden/deleted your profile by now....your fear is not a reason to not tell her. If she finds out later it could all be ruined anyway. Live with a clear conscience.... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
I think yes, be honest from the outset. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"I wouldn't say anything to someone I hadn't known for long.
They might dump you in a few weeks and know everything about you they don't need to know.
"
But, if you're thinking of seeing other people while you're with her, then tell her now. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wouldn't say anything to someone I hadn't known for long.
They might dump you in a few weeks and know everything about you they don't need to know.
"
I agree with this. Be sure of her first. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Not a good start if you don't tell her.
I have always waited until I and I felt she, was feeling that things were right between us and then was totally open, not just about sexual issues but other important issues as well.
Do not hide it and tell yourself that your sexual inclinations will go away or be able to suppress them. You won't! They will come back and then you will be into the all too common deceit scenario...... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
Bloody right you should tell her - the truth always comes out eventually - be fair to her and be honest with yourself OP |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Figure out what she thinks of bi guys before you say anything. If she's homophobic you will need to decide what to do.
Also are you 'out' to your friends/ family/ people in your town?
If it goes wrong she may out you so be careful. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
If you tell her, you risk losing her.
Depends on the state of your relationship. People are not 100% open at the beginning. If it gets towards serious relationship make a decision then.
Vic x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
100% tell her, be true to yourself that's all that matters |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ...
100% tell her, be true to yourself that's all that matters " thanks mate |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *AYENCouple
over a year ago
Lincolnshire |
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
Are you really asking this?
If you haven't worked out by now that honesty is crucial in any relationship, then I think you should leave that 'nice woman' alone.
K |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Perhaps have a read of the initial post in this thread to demonstrate how damaging not being honest can be
https://m.fabswingers.com/forum/lounge/1244437 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Tell her! It's not healthy keeping secrets in a relationship and if she found out further down the line when both of you become more attached, it will make things a hell of a lot worse. She has a right to know now while it's still early days, then she can make up her mind. Good luck OP x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I tried being honest about being bi on a dating site profile once. It was a very quick way to find out how truely nasty a lot of women are. "
yep.
easy to talk about what's Obvious when you're in the 'fab' bubble. esp if you're lucky enough to be in a relationship with someone who understands your kinks/fetish/sexuality when they stray from the norm.
the single biggest reason why so so many bi-men are closeted and in the shadows is because the vast majority of women out there in the world, no matter how nice they may be, will not touch you with a stick if you admit to being a bi-man.
am i in favour of dishonesty, cheating, sneaking ? no. i am not. But, i also know that when you get older your dating options become limited. being open about Everything without solid relationship foundation can be a sure route to dying alone.
not blowing smoke here, it's my experience. even on supposedly safe and sexually liberated sites the reactions can be heart-breaking, esp when you've been Honest and Open and generally improved your own mental health by being your true self.
it's not as Obvious as you think.
that's all
x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *xydadbodMan
over a year ago
Milton keynes |
"I tried being honest about being bi on a dating site profile once. It was a very quick way to find out how truely nasty a lot of women are.
yep.
easy to talk about what's Obvious when you're in the 'fab' bubble. esp if you're lucky enough to be in a relationship with someone who understands your kinks/fetish/sexuality when they stray from the norm.
the single biggest reason why so so many bi-men are closeted and in the shadows is because the vast majority of women out there in the world, no matter how nice they may be, will not touch you with a stick if you admit to being a bi-man.
am i in favour of dishonesty, cheating, sneaking ? no. i am not. But, i also know that when you get older your dating options become limited. being open about Everything without solid relationship foundation can be a sure route to dying alone.
not blowing smoke here, it's my experience. even on supposedly safe and sexually liberated sites the reactions can be heart-breaking, esp when you've been Honest and Open and generally improved your own mental health by being your true self.
it's not as Obvious as you think.
that's all
x"
I get that and understandably it's not as straight forward to say to someone you like, especially if you don't know how the other person would react but would you want to start a relationship with someone by hiding something though? Personally I wouldn't want to be in that position where you are battling yourself to either to tell or not and it's more a individual choice and decision. Like you said.. there are likely various scenarios it could lead by being open and honest but I can honestly say to OP is just do what you think is right end of the day. Good luck though |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yes you should.
Isn’t that obvious?
ide stop this but would like tell her about my past..she might run a mile "
If she can't deal with your past then she shouldn't get to be in your future
Doughnut |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Wait...but not for long. If it feels real, then have a chat about your preferences.
She need not know about here if you leave, but she will have to understand your sexuality...to ever get to know the real you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *G LanaTV/TS
over a year ago
Gosport |
"yep.
easy to talk about what's Obvious when you're in the 'fab' bubble. esp if you're lucky enough to be in a relationship with someone who understands your kinks/fetish/sexuality when they stray from the norm.
the single biggest reason why so so many bi-men are closeted and in the shadows is because the vast majority of women out there in the world, no matter how nice they may be, will not touch you with a stick if you admit to being a bi-man.
am i in favour of dishonesty, cheating, sneaking ? no. i am not. But, i also know that when you get older your dating options become limited. being open about Everything without solid relationship foundation can be a sure route to dying alone.
not blowing smoke here, it's my experience. even on supposedly safe and sexually liberated sites the reactions can be heart-breaking, esp when you've been Honest and Open and generally improved your own mental health by being your true self.
it's not as Obvious as you think.
that's all
x"
Pretty much sums up why I have withdrawn from conventional dating and expect to be single the rest of my life. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
Yes! She might love that about you and then think where you might be. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ...
Maybe hide profile on here and just focus on what's happening with her. If it looks like it's going somewhere then you can decide how you'll tell her. Not advocating deceit but rather either you give it a real go with her or not. "
Yeah, if its a very new relationship as suggested I dont think you have to bring it up straight away. but if ye are talking about exclusivity, or even assuming ye are entering 'coupledom' she deserves to know then |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
OP Definitely tell her and be open , I was a closet bisexual guy since my early twenties , It caused two failed marriages and a lot of pain along the way, with the lies I was telling my self to try and justify my actions , the guilt destroys you inside in the end ... Many months of professional counseling later and lots of years down the line and I'm now married to the most amazing lady , we have the best open honest relationship I can imagine , she embraces my bi side , to be loved for who you really are and to be able to lead an open and honest life is the most amazing and liberated thing ... So yes tell her |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *erlins5Man
over a year ago
South Fife |
Definitely be honest with her otherwise you will probably find your self being unfaithful with a guy further down the line if it is kept a secret... And also honest with your self and change your profile from bi curious to bi sexual.... if you know you like cock then surely you are no longer curious |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Of course you need to tell her. You can't go into a relationship with her not knowing the 'real' you. Your life would be a lie, which would be totally unfair on yourself and your girlfriend. Honesty from the start. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just started dating a nice woman..should i be honest about how i like cock?..i like her dont want scare her away ... "
Definitely tell her yes. You never know she may be like me and find it a turn on. Depends if you want her to join in or not. X |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I would say please do every time you meet a guy that guilt will eat you up you will feel like crap when I told my wife I was so scared and her "response was I kind of guessed you can't shock me I've done things only you can dream about" our relationship is much stronger for it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
No. This is a new relationship. You don't have to spill your guts on the first meet. Who is to say it'll still be all systems go after Christmas ?
I've never met another human being and told them all about myself as if we were entering into a marriage....
WAIT....you'll know when the time is right. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic