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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Now there are several layers to unpack in this post. It starts off last weekend, Saturday night, I'm in a pub with some mates and a plethora of beautiful young women come in. I mean like a few dozen, they were all in a group (not a bridal party but I'm keeping this a bit vague) a few of them start to flirt with me, ask me for my number, take pics with me etc.
They were teasing me saying I looked like a very good looking Caucasian celebrity and I was just laughing it off. I was later chatting with two of them and I said if they really wanted me to take them seriously you could flatter me by saying I looked like Idris if I cut off the dreads lol. So I was teasing them saying that their's was the worst pick up line ever.
So both of them turn around and ask me "So what's your go-to pick up line" and I was stumped, and they saw it on my face. I tried my best not to sound too cocky by saying "Hmm, hmm, I don't actually use pick up lines" they started to watch me was like "Oh, you're one of those types of guys" and I was like ok, I mean you guys approached me, a few of your friends already asked for my contact details etc. I'm not trying to be cocky or anything I just don't really approach women in public.
She gave me her number and we spoke more about it on Sunday and I told her the honest truth why i don't approach women in the Uk.
Within my first 2 months of being in the Uk, I went out on a Uni night to a club (now I didn't know much about these things tbh) anyway, I thought most of then women looked young and despite they being over 18 I was like, I'm just going to vibe to the music. I didn't talk to anyone, didn't approach anyone, I don't think I ever stared down anyone to be honest.
I leave the club, about 2 weeks later my flatmate from Uni accommodation and I visited the club, to cut a long story short they were like some girls complained about me the last time I was there. The bouncer though (bless him) came to my defence and said he was observing me and he reported then to the manager that the guy (me) was not talking to anyone, doing anything, he was just listening to the music and sipping a drink, he wasn't d*unk or anything of the sort.
Basically (and this was before I even started the gym across here, because I had injured my tail bone a week before my flight) they thought I looked threatening because of my height, size, dreadlocs.
That was about 2 years ago, I actually went back to the place earlier this year as they had converted the upstairs part to a beer garden and I was on a date with a girl and the bouncer remembered me, told us he's not charging a cover for us, we can go in free. I then explained the whole thing to my date and then the bouncer came across and met with us and told us how the way I was treated was very unfair and that as long as he's working there I don't ever have to pay to go in.
So ever since that particular incident within the first couple of months of being in the UK I don't ever approach women across here. It doesn't really affect me tbh because most times when I go out women do approach me, but my mates especially my white ones don't understand my reasoning etc. I've posted abut this before on the social media because I get tired of people asking me that. Some think I'm shy, but when you experience those types of things that remind you that you're a black guy living in a country when you're a minority, it does change who you are, and in effect does scar you a bit.
Oh and I did ask the bouncer specifically what was their complaint and he said that they said they felt threatened by you.
So yea, that's why I don't have a go-to pick up line (I didn't use pick up lines back in Trinidad either tbh) and why I don't approach women.
(I know it's a lot, please be respectful with the comments) |
