FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > The Cost of Pretty
The Cost of Pretty
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
What do you think regarding the whole issue when it comes to looking pretty?
I mean, do you think we got brain washed by the media by constant beauty standards? Because let me say, it does cost a lot to “look pretty”
And not only in term of money, also time!
Whether it’s the hair (yup, spent £180 yesterday
At the hair dressers AND was there for 4 and a half hours) or the nails. Or make up, or nice clothes. Maybe some could resort to cosmetic procedures (which is totally fine - I think correcting imperfections is great especially if it does good for your own confidence) and those ARE EXPENSIVE.
Do you feel like you reach a point where you stop giving a fuck ? Is it more to do with personality?
In a world where “beauty privilege” is quite real, how do you feel about the whole issue?
I kind of feel like sometimes I’m kind of shackled to the notion of pretty. I feel it and it can be exhausting sometimes!!
Im not sure if it’s my work background (worked in the fashion industry for 8 years) that conditioned me so much.
Being surrounded by attractive people and attractive things, constantly, Must have certainly “conditioned” me and its hard to let go of that.
Thoughts?
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Please don’t say beauty comes from within!! We all know that beauty and attractiveness comes from how radiant you are and how confident you are. None can take that away really
Or someone can be super pretty but the most repulsive person alive
I wanted to have some thoughts and analyse the more shallow part of “standard beauty” |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
The only thing I do religiously every month is get my hair done and my eyebrows waxed, it’s my thing, almost like a monthly bill! Occasionally I get my nails done - other than that I wear make minimal make up day to day and glam up for a night out.
Buying clothes/shoes has always been something I enjoy but I’m not very stereotypical in that I don’t follow the latest trends or feel I need to keep up with them, I’ve my own kinda quirky style.
That’s said for someone with short hair I’m usually 3/3.5hrs in the hairdressers it’s an upkeep and a half xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Pretty to me doesn't cost. One of my friends is an ex model. She's beyond stunning. She looks amazing when she's in her PJ's hair all scruffy and glammed up with an understed glamour I wish I could manage.
Some people are born pretty, some pay to look done up pretty and then there's people like me who are average looking. And that's good enough for me  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Pretty to me doesn't cost. One of my friends is an ex model. She's beyond stunning. She looks amazing when she's in her PJ's hair all scruffy and glammed up with an understed glamour I wish I could manage.
Some people are born pretty, some pay to look done up pretty and then there's people like me who are average looking. And that's good enough for me "
True some are born naturally pretty x but for the rest of us who need a little help, it comes at a cost and it soon racks up.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
Beauty is definitely time, labour and cost expensive isn't it?
I'm going to be honest, I don't buy in to a lot of it - I'll blame a mother who repeatedly told me I wasn't attractive so needed to focus on my studies instead. Not blame, thank her.
When I see the upkeep my friends go through - weaves, false nails, fake eyelashes, brow lamination, waxing, fake tan... so much. It costs a lot. And the cost of makeup! Holy fuck it mounts up. I think that if people want to do it to celebrate and enjoy experimenting with their looks, that's great. As long as it doesn't come from a place of pressure I'm all for it - people should be able to feel like the best them.
I'm attending a social soon and I'll be very honest. I've contemplated doing all sorts in terms of beauty treatments to try and look less... well me. Good. That's a bit sad I think. Like I feel like I need to be this perfect me with glowing caramel skin and doe eyes and long lashes. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Beauty is definitely time, labour and cost expensive isn't it?
I'm going to be honest, I don't buy in to a lot of it - I'll blame a mother who repeatedly told me I wasn't attractive so needed to focus on my studies instead. Not blame, thank her.
When I see the upkeep my friends go through - weaves, false nails, fake eyelashes, brow lamination, waxing, fake tan... so much. It costs a lot. And the cost of makeup! Holy fuck it mounts up. I think that if people want to do it to celebrate and enjoy experimenting with their looks, that's great. As long as it doesn't come from a place of pressure I'm all for it - people should be able to feel like the best them.
I'm attending a social soon and I'll be very honest. I've contemplated doing all sorts in terms of beauty treatments to try and look less... well me. Good. That's a bit sad I think. Like I feel like I need to be this perfect me with glowing caramel skin and doe eyes and long lashes."
I think tho Meli, it might not come from pressure from others but we are so “brain washed” into it, that it’s become a mix between a do it of us but also because “I need to look pretty”
They go hand in hand, but holy molesss. Expensive much??
And the time spent for it all, even just time spent working out to achieve the “perfect summer bod” 
This also applies to guys |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Beauty is definitely time, labour and cost expensive isn't it?
I'm going to be honest, I don't buy in to a lot of it - I'll blame a mother who repeatedly told me I wasn't attractive so needed to focus on my studies instead. Not blame, thank her.
When I see the upkeep my friends go through - weaves, false nails, fake eyelashes, brow lamination, waxing, fake tan... so much. It costs a lot. And the cost of makeup! Holy fuck it mounts up. I think that if people want to do it to celebrate and enjoy experimenting with their looks, that's great. As long as it doesn't come from a place of pressure I'm all for it - people should be able to feel like the best them.
I'm attending a social soon and I'll be very honest. I've contemplated doing all sorts in terms of beauty treatments to try and look less... well me. Good. That's a bit sad I think. Like I feel like I need to be this perfect me with glowing caramel skin and doe eyes and long lashes."
Having said that, I’m sure you will feel so good looking at yourself all nicely done up.
It does feel good when you look at yourself and think
“Holy smokes, I’m actually looking pretty”
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
To be honest I can be arsed with all the faff! I'd rather people see the natural me rather than a made up version. I know I'm not pretty (but I'll do) and no amount of beauty products are going to change that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Pretty to me doesn't cost. One of my friends is an ex model. She's beyond stunning. She looks amazing when she's in her PJ's hair all scruffy and glammed up with an understed glamour I wish I could manage.
Some people are born pretty, some pay to look done up pretty and then there's people like me who are average looking. And that's good enough for me
True some are born naturally pretty x but for the rest of us who need a little help, it comes at a cost and it soon racks up.
"
But is it worth all that cost? Don't know maybe I've gotten to a point in my life I actually kinda like my face after hating it for so long. Do I have wrinkles hell yeah I do, do I have white hair yep. But whose version of pretty do we adhere to?
My best mate who clearly is prettier than me, will bang on how pretty my eyes are, how soft my skin is and that nobody will forget my hair.
I think commercial pretty is different to pretty. If something makes you feel good go do it. But on the same note you don't have to conform to beauty standards if that's not your thing either. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It’s very easy to make a pretty person look prettier. And you can spend a lot of money doing that with diminishing returns. It could be confirmation bias but I often think that the ones who spend the most, actually need it the least.
I’m terms of who you do it for, it’s probably one of 4 main reasons (in order of how I see it your mileage may vary)
Because you’re expected to
To look good I’m front of your female peers
For yourself
To impress men/a man
Usual cliches apply but I love a girl who can go out without nails, lashes and 3 coats of gloss on. Being able to really go to town on occasion is great, makes you stand out on that day/occasion but being expected to always? Does nothing for me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It’s very easy to make a pretty person look prettier. And you can spend a lot of money doing that with diminishing returns. It could be confirmation bias but I often think that the ones who spend the most, actually need it the least.
Absolutely
I’m terms of who you do it for, it’s probably one of 4 main reasons (in order of how I see it your mileage may vary)
Because you’re expected to
To look good I’m front of your female peers
For yourself
To impress men/a man
Usual cliches apply but I love a girl who can go out without nails, lashes and 3 coats of gloss on. Being able to really go to town on occasion is great, makes you stand out on that day/occasion but being expected to always? Does nothing for me "
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It’s very easy to make a pretty person look prettier. And you can spend a lot of money doing that with diminishing returns. It could be confirmation bias but I often think that the ones who spend the most, actually need it the least.
I’m terms of who you do it for, it’s probably one of 4 main reasons (in order of how I see it your mileage may vary)
Because you’re expected to
To look good I’m front of your female peers
For yourself
To impress men/a man
Usual cliches apply but I love a girl who can go out without nails, lashes and 3 coats of gloss on. Being able to really go to town on occasion is great, makes you stand out on that day/occasion but being expected to always? Does nothing for me "
I see your point! And I agree with you said , and there’s one or two points of what you mentioned in the 4 main reasons that feel that apply to my own personal situation my Ill let you wonder which  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
I've not invested that much money to pretty myself up, over the years.
A couple of hairdressers appointments a year when I was much younger.
Now my niece does it for ¼ of a salon price.
Don't do my nails and only wear makeup to the pub or special occasions.
I'm very low maintenance now.
I don't even bother moisturising my face now I'm old.
I seem to have got very lazy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"To be honest I can be arsed with all the faff! I'd rather people see the natural me rather than a made up version. I know I'm not pretty (but I'll do) and no amount of beauty products are going to change that."
And you look stunning |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think that society puts a lot of pressure on women to look pretty all the time, whereas men can get away with not bothering a lot of the time. It’s a sad reflection of the way society has always favoured men in general. It’s slowly improving over time, but I’m not sure full equality will ever be reached  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think that society puts a lot of pressure on women to look pretty all the time, whereas men can get away with not bothering a lot of the time. It’s a sad reflection of the way society has always favoured men in general. It’s slowly improving over time, but I’m not sure full equality will ever be reached "
And this is kinda why I think it's important to give genuine compliments to people. Why don't people take back pretty from companies trying to make money from us? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"
It does feel good when you look at yourself and think
“Holy smokes, I’m actually looking pretty”
"
But I'm happy when I have that feeling without losing how I look naturally if that makes sense? Like day to day I don't wear makeup and if I'm having a good hair day, just coconut oil on my curls and I feel good. That's pretty. Or the just fucked face, all flushed glowing skin.
You are right, there seems to be an innate desire in some of us to want to strive to be prettier. Brainwashing is an apt word to describe it.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The only thing I spend a reasonable amount of money on is skincare. I never bothered with any until last year, and I wish I had started 25 years ago as the difference is huge.
I do my own eyebrows, I haven't been in a hairdressers for more than 12 years (had a wonderful mobile hairdresser) , I very very occasionally have my nails done, and I don't wear a lot of make up unless I'm going out so my spend there is extremely minimal.
If I had a large disposable income , the above may well be different, but I don't think so, as that's just how I have always been. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It’s very easy to make a pretty person look prettier. And you can spend a lot of money doing that with diminishing returns. It could be confirmation bias but I often think that the ones who spend the most, actually need it the least.
I’m terms of who you do it for, it’s probably one of 4 main reasons (in order of how I see it your mileage may vary)
Because you’re expected to
To look good I’m front of your female peers
For yourself
To impress men/a man
Usual cliches apply but I love a girl who can go out without nails, lashes and 3 coats of gloss on. Being able to really go to town on occasion is great, makes you stand out on that day/occasion but being expected to always? Does nothing for me
I see your point! And I agree with you said , and there’s one or two points of what you mentioned in the 4 main reasons that feel that apply to my own personal situation my Ill let you wonder which "
There’s a quote, something like the last 5% of getting something write takes 95% of the effort (horribly mangled quote) but I think it’s true, most woman are able to look great with reasonable/moderate effort (often none, it’s all confidence as you say really and all this work is purely for propping up that confidence) but to be totally happy is not going to come cheap in time or money. Compromise is key, get that £200 hair cut once every two months, instead of every month, and go spend the £1200 you saved on experiences |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I don't spend much on beauty stuff but still look OK. I was going out last weekend and stayed in a hotel with my fab friend. Before we went out he asked how long it would take me to get ready and I said 10mins. Think I got ready in 5. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I've never worn make up, get my hair cut when I remember which is usually about 3 times a year and only have painted nails when my 6 year old decides to paint them.
I'm very low maintenance and have no real interest in clothes and shoes either. Clothes shopping is a form of torture for me.
I've never wanted to 'look pretty' as such. I'm quite comfortable as I am.
It might be to do with my mum never wearing make up. I never read women's magazines, not even as a teenager. I don't watch reality programs or anything where they wear a lot of make up. It just holds no interest for me.
My husband is very happy with me as I am. I don't know where people find the time for make up, I'd rather spend my morning snuggled up in bed.
Each to their own though. Do what makes you happy |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
For me prettiness radiates from the eyes, that sparkle that comes from within. You can spend as much time and money as you want on make-up, hair, clothes, jewellery... if the eyes aren't alive then it just doesn't work IMO  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think that society puts a lot of pressure on women to look pretty all the time, whereas men can get away with not bothering a lot of the time. It’s a sad reflection of the way society has always favoured men in general. It’s slowly improving over time, but I’m not sure full equality will ever be reached "
Yes, and the OP mentions the price of looking pretty. There is also a price to be paid for those that can't achieve those Instagram looks, and don't feel pretty.
A much higher price I would suggest.
Society seems to go in cycles, and at present we are in a pretty unhealthy one in regards to looks. Driven, I believe, by the reach of social media.
It used to be if you didn't bother with the fashion magazines etc. you could avoid some of the pressure, now it's constantly in people's faces as everyone they know are posting make overs, and how tos etc. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I've been bringing up four kids and running a business - making myself pretty is not on my agenda. I've never had my nails done, or eyelashes or any other beauty treatments. I go to a good hairdressers every 3 months. £50 round here. I wear minimal makeup. I rarely buy clothes.
I'm told I am pretty by men. Could I look better? Sure. But I don't feel the pressure to. I like my face. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I spend £70 on my hair every 4-6 weeks. £50-70 on beauty in the same time, which depends on if I have a half leg wax as well as Zen pedicure and eyebrow waxing. Other than that, nothing costs much. They're my only luxuries. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I kind of had bit of an eye opener when I started buying makeup and stuff. Like £30 for a single mac eyeliner!! I have grown my hair long and kinda dreading how much it may cost me to get it cut at a more female/unisex place. The Turkish barbers I used to go, do a full hair cut, sort out your eyebrows and nose and stuff for £8 lol.
A bit like the thread about what you think is a waste of money I guess its massively subjective on what's important to you and not others.
I do think women are kinda preyed upon to spend money on there appearance by marketing though, more than men atleast. It also doesnt help with people on tik tok/Instagram flogging their products to a younger generation either plus the problems with body image |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes right to the bone! "
That’s true. I’ve seen the ugliest people who had a beautiful exterior . No procedure can fix that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I've never given a monkey about make up, dancing in the clubs would have sweated it off and having animal muck on your cheek make it a ridiculous notion.
I did used to watch my mates go for the whole spray tan, fake eyelashes and nails etc and be intrigued but it's just not me.
So I have my eyelashes tinted because I can't wear mascara and have facial waxing done because I like being pampered apart from that the minimalistic look is my choice
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I like when a girl feels comfortable with no make up, PJs and a messy bun.
Couldn't care if she didn't shave/wax either (unless she had a mustache like Tom Selleck). I like natural looks x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Surely ‘enhanced’ beauty is a manufactured state of mind that humans have nurtured under the much larger banner of consumerism. And, to balance the point it applies almost equally to male as well as female sexes. The elephant in the room will be revealed when the current sky-rocketing prices that many in this thread have quoted become unaffordable. Perhaps the next question could ask, “would the costs of beauty ever override your costs of paying bills, buying food, supporting dependents etc.? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think that society puts a lot of pressure on women to look pretty all the time, whereas men can get away with not bothering a lot of the time. It’s a sad reflection of the way society has always favoured men in general. It’s slowly improving over time, but I’m not sure full equality will ever be reached
Yes, and the OP mentions the price of looking pretty. There is also a price to be paid for those that can't achieve those Instagram looks, and don't feel pretty.
A much higher price I would suggest.
Society seems to go in cycles, and at present we are in a pretty unhealthy one in regards to looks. Driven, I believe, by the reach of social media.
It used to be if you didn't bother with the fashion magazines etc. you could avoid some of the pressure, now it's constantly in people's faces as everyone they know are posting make overs, and how tos etc."
That's a really good point the cost of pretty/beauty for those who can't afford it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Personally, I think you are born pretty or you’re not. You can use make up and change your hair to try and enhance your appearance but I don’t think it changes whether you are pretty or not. "
Yes, I mean there’s only so much that make up can do anyway as it only enhances.
Cosmetic surgery can only fix but can’t really change that much to make someone that isn’t born with a specific foundation to work on.
I mean, some celebs or models had some fixes but they were born already with a pretty base. They are just upping things a notch |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Surely ‘enhanced’ beauty is a manufactured state of mind that humans have nurtured under the much larger banner of consumerism. And, to balance the point it applies almost equally to male as well as female sexes. The elephant in the room will be revealed when the current sky-rocketing prices that many in this thread have quoted become unaffordable. Perhaps the next question could ask, “would the costs of beauty ever override your costs of paying bills, buying food, supporting dependents etc.?"
I dont think it necessarily a product of consumerism. Consumerism just leverages something already there.As the idea of beauty and beauty ideals have been around for alot longer than that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Surely ‘enhanced’ beauty is a manufactured state of mind that humans have nurtured under the much larger banner of consumerism. And, to balance the point it applies almost equally to male as well as female sexes. The elephant in the room will be revealed when the current sky-rocketing prices that many in this thread have quoted become unaffordable. Perhaps the next question could ask, “would the costs of beauty ever override your costs of paying bills, buying food, supporting dependents etc.?
I dont think it necessarily a product of consumerism. Consumerism just leverages something already there.As the idea of beauty and beauty ideals have been around for alot longer than that. "
I agree beauty as a vehicle to ‘hook-up and reproduce’ has been a fundamental aspect of human behaviour since day dot. But, the acceleration of beauty as a business is a relatively recent human development. Even more current is the advertising (hence consumer manipulation) and having to pay through the nose to ‘be’ whatever the advertiser, or bringing it right upto date, ‘influencer’ deems to be beautiful. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *lairekTV/TS
over a year ago
Manchester |
Most of the chat here refers to women, for obvious reasons.
What do people think about Rylan on TV?
Is he pretty? It's certainly a heavily manufactured image. I confess, it feels artificial to me, but no more than the female presenters I guess. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have my hair cut every 3/4 months, and it’s £15, occasionally get my eyebrows waxed, and I wear eyeliner and mascara usually, but that’s it for me (unless I’m going out)
I would quite like to have my nails done, but it’s expensive.
I think the standards of beauty are ridiculous, and they aren’t attainable because they generally aren’t even real.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The whole beauty industry depends on our insecurites to thrive but let's face it we wouldn't do half the stuff we do if society didn't influence us to. Yes of course a part of it makes us feel good about ourselves but mostly we are all seeking that acceptance from others. The world is a very visual place and we just live in it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"
I kind of feel like sometimes I’m kind of shackled to the notion of pretty.
"
That’s the only bit of what you said I would worry about.
If you have the money and it’s important to you do it - hair, clothes, make up, cosmetic surgery we live in an age where how you feel is what matters, so changing yourself to look on the outside to match how you feel on the inside makes sense , it’s living authentically , it often gives you an advantage too!
But you can’t do it forever , looks fade , hair drops out or goes white, lines and saggy bits will come. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have quite a few products to keep my teeth v. clean. (I seem to get compliments on my teeth a lot.)
My old dentist told me to get a waterpick, which i use about once a week. That was about 50 quid, got it few years ago and still going strong.
About once a month I'll use a crochet hook (which i got for about 2 quid) to tidy my hair, which takes about 10 mins.
So my regime is quite cheap really.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I get my haircut when it starts to look a mess usually for about £25 or less. I colour my own hair when the kids tell me I’m getting too grey. Last time I had a manicure must have been about 12 years ago, very rarely where nail varnish apart from on my toes. Do my own eyebrows every now and then. Bought false lashes but never wear them in fear of them falling off. I wear makeup most days but look pretty natural but if I’m going out then I’ll make more of an effort with the makeup. I have friends that spend a fortune on beauty treatments but I just think it’s a waste of money. I’d much prefer to buy myself a new outfit or something x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Most of the chat here refers to women, for obvious reasons.
What do people think about Rylan on TV?
Is he pretty? It's certainly a heavily manufactured image. I confess, it feels artificial to me, but no more than the female presenters I guess."
He looks like a Ken doll tbh.
His beard looks like its drawn on with a sharpie pen |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Depends on the definition of pretty really, doesn't it.
I was 10 in 1970 and 20 in 1980 so grew up in eras vastly changing and very fast.
I've watched my chdren and grandchildren subjected to beauty standards that are ridiculous, horrifying and even ugly.
If anyone is happy to spend vast quantities of money to define themselves as pretty/beautiful or no money at all, then who really cares.
I'm in the latter group, I'm too busy with life and little money to waste on anything frivolous or with labels or claims based on profit making to call myself pretty.
I'm a pretty nice human and that's fine by me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I now only cut my hair (trimmed) twice a year as growing it. I stopped colouring my hair just over two years ago now and I’m embracing the grey.
I don’t wax or shave (apart from shaving my legs).
Do I look immaculately groomed? No. But would I want to? No. I am a big fan of the wild and carefree look. It’s not for everyone but it suits me.
What a bit of makeup can’t coverup and/or improve I just don’t worry about now. Life is far too short.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Whoever said that we mostly live in a visual world and it’s undeniable. He/she really did hit The nail on the head.
As sad and superficial as it may be |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'd never heard of 'beauty privilege' but I guess that's a real thing.
Whilst me, and others may not be able to afford certain treatments, I think that it shows if you take time and care in your appearance. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I have never been influenced by the media or peers as to what I should wear or look like.
I was brought uo to be independent and am comfortable in my own skin. I rarely wear makeup, wear clothes I like and hate that so many seem to need filters and fillers to feel good about themselves. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What do you think regarding the whole issue when it comes to looking pretty?
I mean, do you think we got brain washed by the media by constant beauty standards? Because let me say, it does cost a lot to “look pretty”
And not only in term of money, also time!
Whether it’s the hair (yup, spent £180 yesterday
At the hair dressers AND was there for 4 and a half hours) or the nails. Or make up, or nice clothes. Maybe some could resort to cosmetic procedures (which is totally fine - I think correcting imperfections is great especially if it does good for your own confidence) and those ARE EXPENSIVE.
Do you feel like you reach a point where you stop giving a fuck ? Is it more to do with personality?
In a world where “beauty privilege” is quite real, how do you feel about the whole issue?
I kind of feel like sometimes I’m kind of shackled to the notion of pretty. I feel it and it can be exhausting sometimes!!
Im not sure if it’s my work background (worked in the fashion industry for 8 years) that conditioned me so much.
Being surrounded by attractive people and attractive things, constantly, Must have certainly “conditioned” me and its hard to let go of that.
Thoughts?
"
The whole beauty/fashion/magazine/movie industry is a racket to drive spending on such things. That’s been the way fir over a century. Combined Fashion & beauty id a Trillion $ annual industry. So of course it is going to be expensive. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"What do you think regarding the whole issue when it comes to looking pretty?
I mean, do you think we got brain washed by the media by constant beauty standards? Because let me say, it does cost a lot to “look pretty”
And not only in term of money, also time!
Whether it’s the hair (yup, spent £180 yesterday
At the hair dressers AND was there for 4 and a half hours) or the nails. Or make up, or nice clothes. Maybe some could resort to cosmetic procedures (which is totally fine - I think correcting imperfections is great especially if it does good for your own confidence) and those ARE EXPENSIVE.
Do you feel like you reach a point where you stop giving a fuck ? Is it more to do with personality?
In a world where “beauty privilege” is quite real, how do you feel about the whole issue?
I kind of feel like sometimes I’m kind of shackled to the notion of pretty. I feel it and it can be exhausting sometimes!!
Im not sure if it’s my work background (worked in the fashion industry for 8 years) that conditioned me so much.
Being surrounded by attractive people and attractive things, constantly, Must have certainly “conditioned” me and its hard to let go of that.
Thoughts?
The whole beauty/fashion/magazine/movie industry is a racket to drive spending on such things. That’s been the way fir over a century. Combined Fashion & beauty id a Trillion $ annual industry. So of course it is going to be expensive. "
Very true and I had inside knowledge too. But at the end of the day, when everyone around you acts and looks a certain part, you can’t help but sort of be conditioned too x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have never been influenced by the media or peers as to what I should wear or look like.
I was brought uo to be independent and am comfortable in my own skin. I rarely wear makeup, wear clothes I like and hate that so many seem to need filters and fillers to feel good about themselves. "
I have always been comfortable in my skin, but as I have got older there are certain things that I'd change. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have never been influenced by the media or peers as to what I should wear or look like.
I was brought uo to be independent and am comfortable in my own skin. I rarely wear makeup, wear clothes I like and hate that so many seem to need filters and fillers to feel good about themselves. "
That’s good! X I don’t think if someone is influenced isn’t thinking with its own mind tho. Sometimes things are so subtle and constant that it becomes the norm.
Very much like DWP movie where Andy didn’t really care about the way she looks till she actually did because of what went on around her. That film depicts the industry quite correctly |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have never been influenced by the media or peers as to what I should wear or look like.
I was brought uo to be independent and am comfortable in my own skin. I rarely wear makeup, wear clothes I like and hate that so many seem to need filters and fillers to feel good about themselves.
I have always been comfortable in my skin, but as I have got older there are certain things that I'd change."
I don't love everything about myself but would never consider cosmetic surgery or botox myself. I find a lot of people whi try to stay looking young just end up looking slightly wrong. Lines are a sign of a life well lived
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I would also never pay £100 for a hair do 
If gets cut infrequently and I dye ir myself. "
I do this too..I do pay a bit for the cut, bet he is really good and I am always happy.
I tried someone cheaper but I wasn't happy with the cut |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have never been influenced by the media or peers as to what I should wear or look like.
I was brought uo to be independent and am comfortable in my own skin. I rarely wear makeup, wear clothes I like and hate that so many seem to need filters and fillers to feel good about themselves.
That’s good! X I don’t think if someone is influenced isn’t thinking with its own mind tho. Sometimes things are so subtle and constant that it becomes the norm.
Very much like DWP movie where Andy didn’t really care about the way she looks till she actually did because of what went on around her. That film depicts the industry quite correctly "
I don't get the reference I'm afraid 
What is DWP? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I do my own eyebrows ,nails only wear make up when going out like parties ,clubs the only thing I got done was my hair at the hairdressers when I went In brown and came out red .Didn't want to do it myself in case I messed it up and payed £80 pounds .x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Most of the chat here refers to women, for obvious reasons.
What do people think about Rylan on TV?
Is he pretty? It's certainly a heavily manufactured image. I confess, it feels artificial to me, but no more than the female presenters I guess.
He looks like a Ken doll tbh.
His beard looks like its drawn on with a sharpie pen"
I'm not a fan of the current artificial beauty look on men or women. So many women look like carbon copies of each other, I prefer individuality. I see makeup as something to enhance what you have. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have never been influenced by the media or peers as to what I should wear or look like.
I was brought uo to be independent and am comfortable in my own skin. I rarely wear makeup, wear clothes I like and hate that so many seem to need filters and fillers to feel good about themselves.
That’s good! X I don’t think if someone is influenced isn’t thinking with its own mind tho. Sometimes things are so subtle and constant that it becomes the norm.
Very much like DWP movie where Andy didn’t really care about the way she looks till she actually did because of what went on around her. That film depicts the industry quite correctly
I don't get the reference I'm afraid
What is DWP?"
Devil wears Prada x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have never been influenced by the media or peers as to what I should wear or look like.
I was brought uo to be independent and am comfortable in my own skin. I rarely wear makeup, wear clothes I like and hate that so many seem to need filters and fillers to feel good about themselves.
That’s good! X I don’t think if someone is influenced isn’t thinking with its own mind tho. Sometimes things are so subtle and constant that it becomes the norm.
Very much like DWP movie where Andy didn’t really care about the way she looks till she actually did because of what went on around her. That film depicts the industry quite correctly
I don't get the reference I'm afraid
What is DWP?"
Think it's Devil Wears Prada x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *urio77Man
over a year ago
northampton |
.be your own person and don’t buy into the media’s perception of beauty. Everything that you have mentioned that you spend money on,to maintain the standard that your happy with is crazy. For me personally,I find no appeal in any woman done up to the ‘9’s’as it just stinks of fake. No/minimal make up,good dress sense,believing in yourself and a fantastic personality is beauty in my eyes. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Most of the chat here refers to women, for obvious reasons.
What do people think about Rylan on TV?
Is he pretty? It's certainly a heavily manufactured image. I confess, it feels artificial to me, but no more than the female presenters I guess.
He looks like a Ken doll tbh.
His beard looks like its drawn on with a sharpie pen
I'm not a fan of the current artificial beauty look on men or women. So many women look like carbon copies of each other, I prefer individuality. I see makeup as something to enhance what you have."
No I really dont either. It all looks so artificial. And everyone does look the same.
He gives me that uncanny valley feeling type thing, he looks more like an android or sexdoll made to look as human as possible, but they didnt get it quite right lol. But I quite enjoy him and his mum on gogglebox
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The media is hugely to blame because it makes society believe we should look a certain way. Prim, proper, hair and make up.
I was definitely suckered in when I was younger but since being in a comfortable relationship I've learnt to love my "natural beauty". Since having children it's also heightened it.
I don't want our daughter to think girls wear make up and have their hair done all the time. I also don't want our son to grow up thinking girls and women should be at those standards.
I don't wear any makeup. I rarely run a brush through my hair (as seen on many pictures where my hair looks like it's been dipped in a hedgerow) My last hair appointment was a year ago and that was just a birthday treat.
It also makes for very easy maintenance too.
Am I dressed? Yes
Are my teeth clean? Yes
OK, ready to go |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Even on here when I sent face pics I don't put makeup on. You see the raw and unfiltered version of me because that's what you'd get in real life (maybe minus the clothing) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Even on here when I sent face pics I don't put makeup on. You see the raw and unfiltered version of me because that's what you'd get in real life (maybe minus the clothing) "
Well you look fabulous raw, even if your armpit hair is longer than mine |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *urio77Man
over a year ago
northampton |
"Even on here when I sent face pics I don't put makeup on. You see the raw and unfiltered version of me because that's what you'd get in real life (maybe minus the clothing) "
Yep just had a gander at the lack of clothing on your profile and it looked ace |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"The media is hugely to blame because it makes society believe we should look a certain way. Prim, proper, hair and make up.
I was definitely suckered in when I was younger but since being in a comfortable relationship I've learnt to love my "natural beauty". Since having children it's also heightened it.
I don't want our daughter to think girls wear make up and have their hair done all the time. I also don't want our son to grow up thinking girls and women should be at those standards.
I don't wear any makeup. I rarely run a brush through my hair (as seen on many pictures where my hair looks like it's been dipped in a hedgerow) My last hair appointment was a year ago and that was just a birthday treat.
It also makes for very easy maintenance too.
Am I dressed? Yes
Are my teeth clean? Yes
OK, ready to go "
I love what you wrote! Literally every single thing x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"My only expenses for looking pretty are razor blades once a year, which is maybe like £35 and hair paste which is like £12 a year."
What about your gym membership tho x I mean, guys do have the “gym bod” and that might cost money x
I mean, well spent money as there’s so many benefits to working out apart and the good body is just the natural end result of going to the gym |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I mean, do you think we got brain washed"
Yes I do.
And beauty does come from within
If one needs to spend money to feel good, other than a basic haircut, then they are trying too hard in my opinion |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"My only expenses for looking pretty are razor blades once a year, which is maybe like £35 and hair paste which is like £12 a year.
What about your gym membership tho x I mean, guys do have the “gym bod” and that might cost money x
I mean, well spent money as there’s so many benefits to working out apart and the good body is just the natural end result of going to the gym "
That's not a "pretty" expense to me. I personally would count that as a mental and physical health expense |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The media is hugely to blame because it makes society believe we should look a certain way. Prim, proper, hair and make up."
I don't agree, do we really have to do everything we see in the media, including social media?
No we do not.
If anyone truly believes they do, then they only have themselves to blame |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"That's not a "pretty" expense to me. I personally would count that as a mental and physical health expense
I agree, exercise and caked on makeup are nothing like."
Not necessarily. Make up for some can boost mental health like the gym does for me. So in a way it can count as health expense |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The media is hugely to blame because it makes society believe we should look a certain way. Prim, proper, hair and make up.
I don't agree, do we really have to do everything we see in the media, including social media?
No we do not.
If anyone truly believes they do, then they only have themselves to blame "
The ones aimed at young girls would make them believe that's how they should look. Simple things like "my little pony" adverts or similar, the girl in the ad usually has makeup on. Yes, maybe subtly but it's still there and doesn't portray the right example. In my mind anyway. The skimpy clothing in the pre teen section of the clothes shop, the two piece swim suits etc etc. It all comes down to manipulating young girls who grow into insecure pre teens, teens who could be a pro MUA but it's not a good example. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The media is hugely to blame because it makes society believe we should look a certain way. Prim, proper, hair and make up.
I don't agree, do we really have to do everything we see in the media, including social media?
No we do not.
If anyone truly believes they do, then they only have themselves to blame
The ones aimed at young girls would make them believe that's how they should look. Simple things like "my little pony" adverts or similar, the girl in the ad usually has makeup on. Yes, maybe subtly but it's still there and doesn't portray the right example. In my mind anyway. The skimpy clothing in the pre teen section of the clothes shop, the two piece swim suits etc etc. It all comes down to manipulating young girls who grow into insecure pre teens, teens who could be a pro MUA but it's not a good example. "
So so this the preconditioning of girls that pretty is important is worrying. We're a blended family, we asked the kids what they wanted to be as grown ups, the boys an engineer and a footballer the girl pretty |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
1)
Do any of us have a say of how we look. ?
2) looks are akin deep. And a mere shell.
3) over importance is put along looks and not the Content of any person.
4) looks & appearance is what we first set eye's on. Then the Gob opens and the mindset gets revealed.
5)
How many of us have been Deceived by looks alone??
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have opposing thoughts on this
If being 'pretty' makes you feel better about yourself, if being 'pretty' gives you the confidence that you need to go about your week, I think that as long as it is something you can afford and control, you can't put a ceiling price on it
If being pretty is an addiction or is something that you need to feel to function on a basic level, then I don't feel it is necessarily healthy
Like all addictions, it has a source that needs identifying and working
There is always, of course, the middle ground
All I would say if you are doing 'pretty' do it for you and not for others |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *urio77Man
over a year ago
northampton |
The whole concept of beauty is surely a reflection of how strong your mind is. Weak minded fickle folk follow the latest trends as they think it makes them cool and relevant. There happy to go along with a herd mentality and all look exactly the same because it’s current. Then change a month later when a celebrity walks into a club with a lampshade on their head. Strong minded folk see pass the bullshit and just rock there own look. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"£180 on hair . I got pissed off when mine went up £10 a cut
it wasn’t just a cut . I had to do highlights and stuff
But yeah, prices in London  "
Esp if you use Tony n guy. Lol snip snip |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"£180 on hair . I got pissed off when mine went up £10 a cut
it wasn’t just a cut . I had to do highlights and stuff
But yeah, prices in London "
Esp if you use Tony n guy. Lol snip snip  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have opposing thoughts on this
If being 'pretty' makes you feel better about yourself, if being 'pretty' gives you the confidence that you need to go about your week, I think that as long as it is something you can afford and control, you can't put a ceiling price on it
If being pretty is an addiction or is something that you need to feel to function on a basic level, then I don't feel it is necessarily healthy
Like all addictions, it has a source that needs identifying and working
There is always, of course, the middle ground
All I would say if you are doing 'pretty' do it for you and not for others "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Oh wow, your haircut price could have bought my car and filled the tank full of fuel ! Sure it looks amazing, and a damn sight better than mine haha! For me, I’m a no frills kind of lady, and couldn’t justify the time or finance to treat myself to products and salon visits. But if folk can do it, and it makes them feel good about themselves, then why the heck not Miss pc |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I only really go for a haircut monthly which costs like £7 and I was annoyed when they uped it from £5
Everything else I do myself when it comes to grooming. Tweezers for the eyebrows, exfoliating facial scrub, cut and file my own nails. Don't really think I need anything else to be honest |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *urio77Man
over a year ago
northampton |
Oh how the other half live hey. Your profile clearly shows a beautiful body and I imagine that you are fully aware of it as well. The OP has posted a question and been hit with some fairly close to the bone remarks from ladies in a similar position. Then you rock up,Miss look at me and undo all the good work. Ever heard of humility? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I spend very little on my appearance. My hair cut costs about £45 (which I think is EXTORTIONATE) and I buy nice shampoo and conditioner in massive bottles that last me for about 6 months. Other than that, I don't do nails, makeup, skin care, eyebrows, eyelashes or anything else. I buy clothes/footwear highly infrequently.
However, I have pride my appearance and I think anyone who has met me in person would say I'm well presented. I'm just probably wearing clothes I bought in 2010 or possibly even 2002 *shrug*
I bought a new dress and a belt for the MLS, the first new clothes I've bought since COVID started, I think. I do buy skin colour tights relatively often but out of necessity - they get caught on my wheelchair frame and ladder all the fucking time |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Beauty doesn't cost a penny. Trying to make yourself look like something you aren't because you believe this equates to beauty is extortionate. Why is this? Because the same companies that make millions from selling beauty shit are the ones marketing what beauty should look like. If you buy into their nonsense then more fool you.
Mr |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
My idea of pretty isn't all that dogshit. I see what I see. Yet I still look at myself and want to be attractive. This makes me hate myself. SO fuck it I'll just stay in |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago
Shrewsbury |
I can't remember when I had my hair cut at a salon, fear of hairdresser!, colour at home £5.50
Are we going the full face routine?
cleanse, tone, moisturiser plus elixar all from tropic so £100
every 4+ months |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I don’t spend a fortune on my appearance compared to some of the figures quoted, I get my hair done about every 2-3 months. I do like wearing makeup but not top end products. I like to treat myself to new clothes, think that’s a product of having to wear second hand clothes when I was a child.
I do these things for myself, but I do think the media puts a lot of pressure on people to look perfect as they see it x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I spent very little on beauty. Probably the biggest cost is hair dye, which I redo about 4 weekly. I get my hair cut roughly 6 monthly and pay around £20 and use Aldi moisturiser, as it's better than many much more expensive brands. I do buy makeup but infrequently. Other than that it's just everyday shampoo, conditioner and showergel.
I buy the majority of my clothes second hand.
I'd rather spend my money on doing things and visiting places. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
