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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We haven’t had one for a while. So you know the drill. Pick a mate. Tell them someone you like or something nice about someone and then they’ll post it anonymously… I’ll be postie but the more the merrier.
Say I’m in and voila. Spread some love this cold blustery day
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's been a hard year, but as an optimist and a fool in equal measures, I decided to get a scratch card for the lottery while I was waiting to pay for my breakfast of Caviar and Frosties. Upon completing my repast, I spotted the lottery ticket which I had almost forgotten about. I scratch off the first line with anticipation. Then the 2nd - I had £1000 twice, another and I'd be rich enough to get a free months rent! With trembling fingers I scratched off that last line, only to reveal the fateful words:
"Please tell unicorn sparkles to get on that train and let me entertain her for a couple of days" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was watching some TV, it was just background noise really while I ironed my socks. I'd never seen Anchorman before, so it took a while before I realised something was wrong. Was he...was he talking directly to me? Through the TV? Yes he was, it was as if the whole scene had paused, and he was breaking the 4th wall trying to get my attention! I put down my iron, and heard Ron Burgundy say, directly to me "Would you please let Appletree know that she has an absolutely breathtaking hiney. I mean that thing is good. I want to be friends with it." I reached for the remote to rewind the scene so I could record it, but tripped and hit my head on a bench. I awoke several hours later, wondering if it was all a dream... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was earning a 2nd income putting the jokes into Christmas Crackers, and let me tell you, I thought I had read them all. I mean, I know they are supposed to be bad on purpose, but after reading them and checking for spelling mistakes (and inserting them if there weren't any...) for the 1000th time you soon start to doubt your own mind. So it was with some confusion that I read what looked like a fresh one this morning. There wasn't even a punchline, it just said "The vonmatterhorns are on my hotlist and I'm a fan." Not knowing what to do, I pocketed it, with a view to sticking it in a fortune cookie when my other shift starts later tonight... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's been a hard year, but as an optimist and a fool in equal measures, I decided to get a scratch card for the lottery while I was waiting to pay for my breakfast of Caviar and Frosties. Upon completing my repast, I spotted the lottery ticket which I had almost forgotten about. I scratch off the first line with anticipation. Then the 2nd - I had £1000 twice, another and I'd be rich enough to get a free months rent! With trembling fingers I scratched off that last line, only to reveal the fateful words:
"Please tell unicorn sparkles to get on that train and let me entertain her for a couple of days""
Ooooh yes please need a holiday hahahaha |
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"My gorgeous sexy mate says
Message for the Vonhorns please..
Absolutely stunning couple, what's a girl gotta do to be the third wheel?
"
Slide in to our box and ask nicely Oh and K likes to perv on boobs too... just saying 
LvM |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My gorgeous sexy mate says
Message for the Vonhorns please..
Absolutely stunning couple, what's a girl gotta do to be the third wheel?
Slide in to our box and ask nicely Oh and K likes to perv on boobs too... just saying
LvM"
Damn being too far away  would love to be Ks play thing. But this message genuinely wasn’t from me. Promise. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was watching some TV, it was just background noise really while I ironed my socks. I'd never seen Anchorman before, so it took a while before I realised something was wrong. Was he...was he talking directly to me? Through the TV? Yes he was, it was as if the whole scene had paused, and he was breaking the 4th wall trying to get my attention! I put down my iron, and heard Ron Burgundy say, directly to me "Would you please let Appletree know that she has an absolutely breathtaking hiney. I mean that thing is good. I want to be friends with it." I reached for the remote to rewind the scene so I could record it, but tripped and hit my head on a bench. I awoke several hours later, wondering if it was all a dream..."
It must be a slow day for you Dangermouse! Who is this delight that supposedly isn't friends with it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was watching some TV, it was just background noise really while I ironed my socks. I'd never seen Anchorman before, so it took a while before I realised something was wrong. Was he...was he talking directly to me? Through the TV? Yes he was, it was as if the whole scene had paused, and he was breaking the 4th wall trying to get my attention! I put down my iron, and heard Ron Burgundy say, directly to me "Would you please let Appletree know that she has an absolutely breathtaking hiney. I mean that thing is good. I want to be friends with it." I reached for the remote to rewind the scene so I could record it, but tripped and hit my head on a bench. I awoke several hours later, wondering if it was all a dream...
It must be a slow day for you Dangermouse! Who is this delight that supposedly isn't friends with it?"
A postie never tells.
He might steal birthday cards that have obviously got £20 in them but he never tells about that either |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I was watching some TV, it was just background noise really while I ironed my socks. I'd never seen Anchorman before, so it took a while before I realised something was wrong. Was he...was he talking directly to me? Through the TV? Yes he was, it was as if the whole scene had paused, and he was breaking the 4th wall trying to get my attention! I put down my iron, and heard Ron Burgundy say, directly to me "Would you please let Appletree know that she has an absolutely breathtaking hiney. I mean that thing is good. I want to be friends with it." I reached for the remote to rewind the scene so I could record it, but tripped and hit my head on a bench. I awoke several hours later, wondering if it was all a dream...
It must be a slow day for you Dangermouse! Who is this delight that supposedly isn't friends with it?
A postie never tells.
He might steal birthday cards that have obviously got £20 in them but he never tells about that either"
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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A Christmas veggie friend of mine has slid in my
Box to tell wandawoman
Your pictures are fantastic and you always come over well when I see your posts. Great to see you on the forums |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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A lovely mate has asked me …
Would you be so kind to pass on to the delightfully sexy looking Hotwife, that red is definitely her colour, and could I seduce her with the offer of a candle lit donner kebab and babycham supper? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My sexy mate says
“Could you tell apple tree that I’ll shake her apples if she’d fiddle my stick” 
what a corker. Fiddlesticks, I'm coming for you. "
Can we share him? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A Christmas veggie friend of mine has slid in my
Box to tell wandawoman
Your pictures are fantastic and you always come over well when I see your posts. Great to see you on the forums"
 thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My sexy mate says
“Could you tell apple tree that I’ll shake her apples if she’d fiddle my stick”
what a corker. Fiddlesticks, I'm coming for you.
Can we share him? "
I'd share my last sip of water with you Unicorn  I'd probably result in some very passionate kissing but that's what I'm here for |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My sexy mate says
“Could you tell apple tree that I’ll shake her apples if she’d fiddle my stick”
what a corker. Fiddlesticks, I'm coming for you.
Can we share him?
I'd share my last sip of water with you Unicorn I'd probably result in some very passionate kissing but that's what I'm here for "
Oh hell yes I’m here for that. I’d give you my last rolo. Passionate kisses are my weakness. X |
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A delightful message for WandaWoman has just landed in my box
This rugged individual would like her to know that
"normally I don't like to look down on people but I'll make an exception for her profile pic"
He's a charmer  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A delightful message for WandaWoman has just landed in my box
This rugged individual would like her to know that
"normally I don't like to look down on people but I'll make an exception for her profile pic"
He's a charmer "
Oh my! Thank you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Also a message popped into my box from a pal who needs to tell Sparkles….” I have my speedos on and would love to dive into her cleavage.” "
Ooooohhh |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A message in my box for the lovely woody b. From a gorgeous woman
“Please tell
Woody B he’s hot“. X"
It’s this time of the afternoon, I’ve got the heating on.
*thank you. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A lovely mate has asked me …
Would you be so kind to pass on to the delightfully sexy looking Hotwife, that red is definitely her colour, and could I seduce her with the offer of a candle lit donner kebab and babycham supper?"
If you make it a chinese instead you got a deal |
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"These hot hot hot gentlman wants to give a message to _uriousscouser..
Will you tell _uriousscouser that she makes my eyes googly in a good way."
You want to see me doing jumping jacks with them! |
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