FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > What have you learned about people..
What have you learned about people..
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
..in a general way by being here and how do you deal with it.
Involving something that is important to your principles.
Forget ratios as we have all encountered others on here.
I'll start you off:
I have learnt that my truth is often not others truth and their truth is weird.
It sometimes cracks me up and I find it hilarious. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Not everyone means what they say - most people can talk the talk but that's it.
How do I deal with it? Take none of it in any way seriously and assume everyone is full of shit until events prove otherwise! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away."
I was guilty of this today, so stupid  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
 you’re right, of course, we all think that we’re the sane ones and it’s everybody else that is slightly weird or wrong.
Like it’s other people’s houses that always have a bit of a smell about them but mine doesn’t.
And my decor is spot on but everyone else’s is, well, a bit off.
For example, I can’t fathom why my inbox isn’t dropping in pussy. It’s clearly all the women that are wrong!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
A lot of people get the entire way through their life without ever really living. They just sort of exist and plod along. But if they're good with that then more power to them.
Dunning Kruger is very real
Most people when push comes to shove think they'll do the right thing even if it means going against the crowd. But they won't
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not everyone means what they say - most people can talk the talk but that's it.
How do I deal with it? Take none of it in any way seriously and assume everyone is full of shit until events prove otherwise!"
A powerful way of putting it and experience is a great teacher. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I’ve learnt that anyone who lies to others on a regular basis will think nothing of lying to me too. I should avoid those people.
I often wonder if those people even know theyre lying any more"
I don’t think they do.. it’s just part of who they are. Not even always maliciously.. just completely oblivious to the word truth. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away."
I'm not seeing the reasoning behind this?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *illy999TV/TS
over a year ago
Taunton |
"I’ve learnt that anyone who lies to others on a regular basis will think nothing of lying to me too. I should avoid those people.
I often wonder if those people even know theyre lying any more"
Exactly , my sentiments aussi.. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"A lot of people get the entire way through their life without ever really living. They just sort of exist and plod along. But if they're good with that then more power to them.
Dunning Kruger is very real
Most people when push comes to shove think they'll do the right thing even if it means going against the crowd. But they won't
"
Thanks for an interesting observation. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away. I'm not seeing the reasoning behind this?"
It's my own opinion, do I need to reason it with you? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
" you’re right, of course, we all think that we’re the sane ones and it’s everybody else that is slightly weird or wrong.
Like it’s other people’s houses that always have a bit of a smell about them but mine doesn’t.
And my decor is spot on but everyone else’s is, well, a bit off.
For example, I can’t fathom why my inbox isn’t dropping in pussy. It’s clearly all the women that are wrong! "
I kind of think of it as the alphabet is A to Z and if you use certain lettering you should know the potential of the meaning behind them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away.
I was guilty of this today, so stupid "
It happens, sometimes it can overwhelm you where you just have to say something. But the energy that goes into the replies after is something I don't get |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away.
I was guilty of this today, so stupid "
You know I did the same this weekend!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away. I'm not seeing the reasoning behind this?
It's my own opinion, do I need to reason it with you?"
Are you thinking generally here or possibly forum alone?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Fab bas distorted my perception and I now assume that there's limited honesty and faithfulness in relationships generally.  "
Gained perceptions can be a hard one to deal with..keep the faith! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away.
I was guilty of this today, so stupid
It happens, sometimes it can overwhelm you where you just have to say something. But the energy that goes into the replies after is something I don't get"
I gave up, it was a pointless exercise  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away."
Yep, seen a lot of that over the last week or so. I've typed out responses a couple of times only to think better of it and step away.
I value differing opinions and don't want to live in an echo chamber, but when someone is just trolling because they desperately crave any attention, even if it's negative, the forum would be much more fun if I could just hide their posts. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away.
I'm not seeing the reasoning behind this?
It's my own opinion, do I need to reason it with you?
Are you thinking generally here or possibly forum alone?
"
Mostly the forum alone I guess as this is where I spend most of my Fab time. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"People bite at the most obvious wind-ups going which leads to so much unnecessary arguing and sniping. It baffles how people don't realise that if they just ignore it and say nothing, it goes away.
I'm not seeing the reasoning behind this?
It's my own opinion, do I need to reason it with you?
Are you thinking generally here or possibly forum alone?
Mostly the forum alone I guess as this is where I spend most of my Fab time."
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have learnt to accept that we are all different, all individuals and all have a different reason to be on Fab. I have learnt to embrace everyone but not everyone will accept me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"That their actions rarely match their words.
Hello and welcome..it's been a while x
It has, hope all is well in your world x"
It is, and I'll call you this week x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have learnt to accept that we are all different, all individuals and all have a different reason to be on Fab. I have learnt to embrace everyone but not everyone will accept me "
Great stuff and something that has to be confronted regularly.
Not always easy! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
On the flip side I’ve learnt that fab is as good a place as any to meet beautiful souls that become very real friends. There are many that are part of my life and welcome in my home anytime. I wouldn’t have met them any other way so that is a blessing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I’ve learnt that anyone who lies to others on a regular basis will think nothing of lying to me too. I should avoid those people.
I often wonder if those people even know theyre lying any more
Exactly , my sentiments aussi.. "
I do think lying doesn't get the censorship it deserves at times. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"That hidden in the darkest corners of fab there are some truly beautiful people who restore my faith and make me smile.
I know what you mean. I have found this too "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I've learned that people are flawed, inherently so. Every single person who posts on here is and sometimes these people have bad days. I've also learned that they are perfect in all their flawed ways. People are brilliant. Fascinating, complicated. Irritating yet heartwarming.
I didn't have much time for people before the forums, I preferred to keep my distance. Now, I don't actually mind them. I love some of them. For all the negativity that can crop up, the positivity outshines it and that's why I'm still on here. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"On the flip side I’ve learnt that fab is as good a place as any to meet beautiful souls that become very real friends. There are many that are part of my life and welcome in my home anytime. I wouldn’t have met them any other way so that is a blessing."
An excellent and true flip side! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"On the flip side I’ve learnt that fab is as good a place as any to meet beautiful souls that become very real friends. There are many that are part of my life and welcome in my home anytime. I wouldn’t have met them any other way so that is a blessing."
Yes this. . I am grateful to fab for that. Something I never thought I’d find and honestly wasn’t even looking for. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I've learned that people are flawed, inherently so. Every single person who posts on here is and sometimes these people have bad days. I've also learned that they are perfect in all their flawed ways. People are brilliant. Fascinating, complicated. Irritating yet heartwarming.
I didn't have much time for people before the forums, I preferred to keep my distance. Now, I don't actually mind them. I love some of them. For all the negativity that can crop up, the positivity outshines it and that's why I'm still on here."
Thank you Meli..as always great food for thought.
I'm not certain if I have your patience though. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"On the flip side I’ve learnt that fab is as good a place as any to meet beautiful souls that become very real friends. There are many that are part of my life and welcome in my home anytime. I wouldn’t have met them any other way so that is a blessing.
Yes this. . I am grateful to fab for that. Something I never thought I’d find and honestly wasn’t even looking for. "
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
The only difference from here and real life is that you can normal make facial & body language judgments on people, how they act & what / how they say something. Here everything is easily masked and the truth hidden.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Fab bas distorted my perception and I now assume that there's limited honesty and faithfulness in relationships generally.
Exactly this x "
There are some who have those qualities I assure you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"The only difference from here and real life is that you can normal make facial & body language judgments on people, how they act & what / how they say something. Here everything is easily masked and the truth hidden.
"
An important observation.
Talking on the phone cam be a great help when/if possible.
Especially with long-distance friends. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"The only difference from here and real life is that you can normal make facial & body language judgments on people, how they act & what / how they say something. Here everything is easily masked and the truth hidden.
An important observation.
Talking on the phone cam be a great help when/if possible.
Especially with long-distance friends."
phone can...etc |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The only difference from here and real life is that you can normal make facial & body language judgments on people, how they act & what / how they say something. Here everything is easily masked and the truth hidden.
An important observation.
Talking on the phone cam be a great help when/if possible.
Especially with long-distance friends."
Sometimes but things still easily hidden by those that want / need too |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"The only difference from here and real life is that you can normal make facial & body language judgments on people, how they act & what / how they say something. Here everything is easily masked and the truth hidden.
An important observation.
Talking on the phone cam be a great help when/if possible.
Especially with long-distance friends.
Sometimes but things still easily hidden by those that want / need too "
If your talking about relative strangers? YES!!!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have found that there are many more accepting, encouraging and believe it or not NON judgemental people in this World than I thought. People who have shown me that the years of shame, self doubt and self loathing were nor necessary. Better late than never.
I am grateful to the good folk on here who have done more for my inner strength than they can possibly know.
.
.
That said there are some wankers out there too! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I have found that there are many more accepting, encouraging and believe it or not NON judgemental people in this World than I thought. People who have shown me that the years of shame, self doubt and self loathing were nor necessary. Better late than never.
I am grateful to the good folk on here who have done more for my inner strength than they can possibly know.
.
.
That said there are some wankers out there too!"
You may have some that will not see your way but they will love you nonetheless! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have found that there are many more accepting, encouraging and believe it or not NON judgemental people in this World than I thought. People who have shown me that the years of shame, self doubt and self loathing were nor necessary. Better late than never.
I am grateful to the good folk on here who have done more for my inner strength than they can possibly know.
.
.
That said there are some wankers out there too! You may have some that will not see your way but they will love you nonetheless!"
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"The only difference from here and real life is that you can normal make facial & body language judgments on people, how they act & what / how they say something. Here everything is easily masked and the truth hidden.
An important observation.
Talking on the phone cam be a great help when/if possible.
Especially with long-distance friends.
Sometimes but things still easily hidden by those that want / need too If your talking about relative strangers? YES!!!!"
Fab folk in general yes, even some that aren’t strangers to you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"The only difference from here and real life is that you can normal make facial & body language judgments on people, how they act & what / how they say something. Here everything is easily masked and the truth hidden.
An important observation.
Talking on the phone cam be a great help when/if possible.
Especially with long-distance friends.
Sometimes but things still easily hidden by those that want / need too If your talking about relative strangers? YES!!!!
Fab folk in general yes, even some that aren’t strangers to you "
Do you mean those who you think of as friends?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"People who need people are the luckiest people in the world. "
 I had to laugh as I get that BUT don't need them too much! UNLESS they understand your (reasonable) need! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"A lot of people get the entire way through their life without ever really living. They just sort of exist and plod along. But if they're good with that then more power to them.
Dunning Kruger is very real
Most people when push comes to shove think they'll do the right thing even if it means going against the crowd. But they won't
"
Thanks Jesus that’s not me. Sometimes I think about that thought as I know some people who just “live” the same ole life and life is passing them by…and it is a TERRIFYING thought to me.
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
That people are very easily manipulated by the 'power force' on here and bullying doesn't end once we are adults.
On a positive note, people are very accepting and open to others on here than in the real world. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
That you can sift through and still find gems, they are not all washed away and really actually do care rather than pretend to care.
Fake friendship is something I find really hard to deal with, but I am getting better at it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Not necessarily from here but here and life in general.
I once believed that reasonable people would come down on the side of what is generally held as morally right over the years i've learned that people don't do that.
They are highly biased in their judgements and most (of either gender) are guided by looks, charm , sexual attraction or peer familiarity and not by what is just or fair.
Does it worry me ? Yes. It's too easy to say , 'Oh this is a sex site, things don't matter here.' I'd agree so far BUT on this forum is a section of wider society. How they behave here is how they behave outside / in life in general.
Scant morals when it comes to making decisions with fairness and thinking being applied less than meaningless tropes like .... well she's me babe innit. He's me mate. She's dead cute tho.....
Far too little thought and too much emotional knee jerk.
Too much belief in Social Media. Too much investment in materialism/consumerism and living via goods and image.
Friendships seem to be based on such superficial criteria rather than if your 'friend' has a sound sense of right and wrong and can be depended on to keep their word. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"A lot of people get the entire way through their life without ever really living. They just sort of exist and plod along. But if they're good with that then more power to them.
Dunning Kruger is very real
Most people when push comes to shove think they'll do the right thing even if it means going against the crowd. But they won't
Thanks Jesus that’s not me. Sometimes I think about that thought as I know some people who just “live” the same ole life and life is passing them by…and it is a TERRIFYING thought to me.
"
A life where things only happen to you and you cannot make things happen for you is one to be avoided AT ALL COSTS: TAKE NOTE! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"That people are very easily manipulated by the 'power force' on here and bullying doesn't end once we are adults.
On a positive note, people are very accepting and open to others on here than in the real world."
"Bullying doesn’t end once we are adults..WOW!"
The second part..yes, in some ways. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"That you can sift through and still find gems, they are not all washed away and really actually do care rather than pretend to care.
Fake friendship is something I find really hard to deal with, but I am getting better at it "
So you are now someone's fake friend? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Not necessarily from here but here and life in general.
I once believed that reasonable people would come down on the side of what is generally held as morally right over the years i've learned that people don't do that.
They are highly biased in their judgements and most (of either gender) are guided by looks, charm , sexual attraction or peer familiarity and not by what is just or fair.
Does it worry me ? Yes. It's too easy to say , 'Oh this is a sex site, things don't matter here.' I'd agree so far BUT on this forum is a section of wider society. How they behave here is how they behave outside / in life in general.
Scant morals when it comes to making decisions with fairness and thinking being applied less than meaningless tropes like .... well she's me babe innit. He's me mate. She's dead cute tho.....
Far too little thought and too much emotional knee jerk.
Too much belief in Social Media. Too much investment in materialism/consumerism and living via goods and image.
Friendships seem to be based on such superficial criteria rather than if your 'friend' has a sound sense of right and wrong and can be depended on to keep their word. "
That last part is the enemy of all the rest written before. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"That you can sift through and still find gems, they are not all washed away and really actually do care rather than pretend to care.
Fake friendship is something I find really hard to deal with, but I am getting better at it So you are now someone's fake friend?"
I have been for a while, it took me a long to realise what they were doing to me before I called them out on it and I am better at recognising and dealing with it now |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"That you can sift through and still find gems, they are not all washed away and really actually do care rather than pretend to care.
Fake friendship is something I find really hard to deal with, but I am getting better at it So you are now someone's fake friend?
I have been for a while, it took me a long to realise what they were doing to me before I called them out on it and I am better at recognising and dealing with it now"
OK, sounds like you took the time to sus them out. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
