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Pointless items of clothing
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Christmas jumpers. Had a Christmas top for work today for Children in Need, got compliments for wearing it mind you.
Still all the same, daft piece of attire. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A gilet. If I’m cold I’d rather just wear a jacket ... with arms."
I never understood the point of these especially the puffy thermal ones.. like why? It has no arms! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A gilet. If I’m cold I’d rather just wear a jacket ... with arms.
I never understood the point of these especially the puffy thermal ones.. like why? It has no arms!"
As above. When they were bodywarmers they did just that. I hate sleeves getting in the way when working so perfect for me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A tie
Theyre just fucking stupid. Here, wear this flat piece of cloth tied in a fancy knot around your neck that serves no purpose "
An emergency tourniquet in an emergency |
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Anything wound around the neck and shoulders, especially if it needs constant re-positioning as the soon as the wearer starts moving about.
Oh, and not forgetting the international idiots' uniform, the baseball cap (particularly over stylised ones with a deliberately short fashion lifespan). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sports bras where you have to take it off like a top.
I made that mistake and had to buy one with a zip down the front the next day.
I wasn't going to dislocate my shoulders trying to peel that off myself every time I wore it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A tie
Theyre just fucking stupid. Here, wear this flat piece of cloth tied in a fancy knot around your neck that serves no purpose "
Woah woah woah hold on now.. theyre perfectly socially acceptable forms of bondage attire for strangulation when tightened |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A tie
Theyre just fucking stupid. Here, wear this flat piece of cloth tied in a fancy knot around your neck that serves no purpose
Woah woah woah hold on now.. theyre perfectly socially acceptable forms of bondage attire for breath play when tightened"
I've amended your choice of word  but yes, ties stay. Also a great blindfold. |
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"A tie
Theyre just fucking stupid. Here, wear this flat piece of cloth tied in a fancy knot around your neck that serves no purpose
Woah woah woah hold on now.. theyre perfectly socially acceptable forms of bondage attire for strangulation when tightened"
•
I think TLS has a point. They're also handy in the boardroom during negotiations... |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"A tie
Theyre just fucking stupid. Here, wear this flat piece of cloth tied in a fancy knot around your neck that serves no purpose
Woah woah woah hold on now.. theyre perfectly socially acceptable forms of bondage attire for strangulation when tightened"
Love my Italian silk ties, even worn them myself a couple of times, so soft |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sports bras where you have to take it off like a top.
I made that mistake and had to buy one with a zip down the front the next day.
I wasn't going to dislocate my shoulders trying to peel that off myself every time I wore it. "
Aren't some of them horrendous! It's a workout in itself just getting them on and off. |
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"A gilet. If I’m cold I’d rather just wear a jacket ... with arms.
I wear body warmers as an inbetweener. Too cold not to wear a coat and too warm not to."
Is there a warehouse somewhere that's full of sleeves just waiting for the next fashion trend? |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"A tie
Theyre just fucking stupid. Here, wear this flat piece of cloth tied in a fancy knot around your neck that serves no purpose "
The Noose. I feckin' hate them. Burn them now!
This is what NHS England have to say about them...
Wear neckties/lanyards (other than bow- ties) during direct patient care activity.
Ties have been shown to be contaminated by pathogens and can accidentally come into contact with patients. They are rarely laundered and play no part in patient care. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A gilet. If I’m cold I’d rather just wear a jacket ... with arms.
Oh...you mean a bodywarmer...as everyone used to call them. Then someone came up with gilet and bumped the prices up!"
They were originally called gilet before body warmer was a term. And also really designed for functional use where the core needs to be kept warm but arms less restricted. They are great as part of an active system for outdoors. Not so good for fashion and mincing about. |
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"The Y front needs to go into Room 101. It's had it's day.
They make the sexiest guy look like his mum still buys his jocks for him  "
I beg to differ, they nicely cup his erection when he gets over excited, now baggy boxers can do one though  |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"A gilet. If I’m cold I’d rather just wear a jacket ... with arms.
I wear body warmers as an inbetweener. Too cold not to wear a coat and too warm not to.
Is there a warehouse somewhere that's full of sleeves just waiting for the next fashion trend?"
Cyclists do have arm and leg warmers, so that's not that ridiculous. There are jackets with zip off sleeves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A tie
Theyre just fucking stupid. Here, wear this flat piece of cloth tied in a fancy knot around your neck that serves no purpose
An emergency tourniquet in an emergency "
Or can double up as a Rambo style bandana in the event of a zombie apocalypse! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The Y front needs to go into Room 101. It's had it's day.
They make the sexiest guy look like his mum still buys his jocks for him
I beg to differ, they nicely cup his erection when he gets over excited, now baggy boxers can do one though "
Fair point.
I'll reconsider |
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"A gilet. If I’m cold I’d rather just wear a jacket ... with arms.
Oh...you mean a bodywarmer...as everyone used to call them. Then someone came up with gilet and bumped the prices up!
They were originally called gilet before body warmer was a term. And also really designed for functional use where the core needs to be kept warm but arms less restricted. They are great as part of an active system for outdoors. Not so good for fashion and mincing about. "
As a kid they were bodywarmers. Always have been and always will be! I just couldn't bring myself to ask for a gilet in a shop. Not without laughing anyway |
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"A gilet. If I’m cold I’d rather just wear a jacket ... with arms.
I wear body warmers as an inbetweener. Too cold not to wear a coat and too warm not to.
Is there a warehouse somewhere that's full of sleeves just waiting for the next fashion trend?
Cyclists do have arm and leg warmers, so that's not that ridiculous. There are jackets with zip off sleeves."
They also wear some other ridiculous looking gear to be fair! I remember the first time I went out on my bike in cycling shorts in the eighties. I thought I was going to get arrested! |
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"Christmas jumpers. Had a Christmas top for work today for Children in Need, got compliments for wearing it mind you.
Still all the same, daft piece of attire."
That reminds me must get the xmas t shirts out and wash them can start wearing them at work soon x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Uggs.
Surely your feet will be more comfortable in proper boots?
What about when it rains, won't it just seep into the Uggs? "
Surely they’re designed for shufflers who wear onzies and never leave the house? |
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Cumberbands... just what?  "
At the last formal dinner where I was a guest after dinner speaker, the subject of cumberbands came up, and me being my usual self, I said that it was a misspelling over the years, they were really called cummerbands, and were a throwback to the days when you had regiment dining in nights where each officer would escort another officers lady in to the dining hall, and they would sit together to engage in stimulating conversation. However if the conversation became so stimulating that the said officers next to each lady got horny, she could unbutton his fly, take his cock out, and play with it till he shot his muck into the waistband between the top of the trousers and the shirt. Hence they became known as cummerbands, but as political correctness came into fashion, they then became refered to as cumberbands. If you believe that load of shit you'll believe anything but it makes for good after dinner conversation at black tie do's |
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"
Cumberbands... just what?
At the last formal dinner where I was a guest after dinner speaker, the subject of cumberbands came up, and me being my usual self, I said that it was a misspelling over the years, they were really called cummerbands, and were a throwback to the days when you had regiment dining in nights where each officer would escort another officers lady in to the dining hall, and they would sit together to engage in stimulating conversation. However if the conversation became so stimulating that the said officers next to each lady got horny, she could unbutton his fly, take his cock out, and play with it till he shot his muck into the waistband between the top of the trousers and the shirt. Hence they became known as cummerbands, but as political correctness came into fashion, they then became refered to as cumberbands. If you believe that load of shit you'll believe anything but it makes for good after dinner conversation at black tie do's"
you had me going great yarn |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"A gilet. If I’m cold I’d rather just wear a jacket ... with arms.
Oh...you mean a bodywarmer...as everyone used to call them. Then someone came up with gilet and bumped the prices up!
They were originally called gilet before body warmer was a term. And also really designed for functional use where the core needs to be kept warm but arms less restricted. They are great as part of an active system for outdoors. Not so good for fashion and mincing about.
As a kid they were bodywarmers. Always have been and always will be! I just couldn't bring myself to ask for a gilet in a shop. Not without laughing anyway "
I always thought that a gilet was a dyslexic's razor. |
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"
Cumberbands... just what?
At the last formal dinner where I was a guest after dinner speaker, the subject of cumberbands came up, and me being my usual self, I said that it was a misspelling over the years, they were really called cummerbands, and were a throwback to the days when you had regiment dining in nights where each officer would escort another officers lady in to the dining hall, and they would sit together to engage in stimulating conversation. However if the conversation became so stimulating that the said officers next to each lady got horny, she could unbutton his fly, take his cock out, and play with it till he shot his muck into the waistband between the top of the trousers and the shirt. Hence they became known as cummerbands, but as political correctness came into fashion, they then became refered to as cumberbands. If you believe that load of shit you'll believe anything but it makes for good after dinner conversation at black tie do'syou had me going great yarn "
Here's another one for you on pointless items of clothing, and that's knickers worn under nurse's scrubs. Some of us old coffin dodgers, as a few of the under 30's who think that they invented sex see us as, can remember the days when nurses uniforms were dresses. However, a little known fact is that they got offered the choice of tights or stockings. Very sexy either way you might think either way, and Ann Summers made a fortune out of the idea. However we are in the 21st century now where nurses scrubs shouldn't come across as fetish wear... Wrong!!! I get the district nurses coming in to see my mum every week, and I can always tell which ones aren't wearing knickers because, the one's who aren't wearing knickers have their scrubs sliding right into the crack of their curvy bums. I get seriously horny watching the girls walking up the driveway, and see their scrubs clinging to the cheeks of their bums showing that they are so obviously not wearing knickers. Pay attention to that detail next time you visit a hospital, and raise your glasses and give a cheer to those gorgeous nurses with the curvy bums who prefer not to wear underwear. |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"A tie
Theyre just fucking stupid. Here, wear this flat piece of cloth tied in a fancy knot around your neck that serves no purpose
An emergency tourniquet in an emergency "
Nah, that's what belts are for. |
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By *orny PTMan
over a year ago
Peterborough |
"
Cumberbands... just what?
At the last formal dinner where I was a guest after dinner speaker, the subject of cumberbands came up, and me being my usual self, I said that it was a misspelling over the years, they were really called cummerbands, and were a throwback to the days when you had regiment dining in nights where each officer would escort another officers lady in to the dining hall, and they would sit together to engage in stimulating conversation. However if the conversation became so stimulating that the said officers next to each lady got horny, she could unbutton his fly, take his cock out, and play with it till he shot his muck into the waistband between the top of the trousers and the shirt. Hence they became known as cummerbands, but as political correctness came into fashion, they then became refered to as cumberbands. If you believe that load of shit you'll believe anything but it makes for good after dinner conversation at black tie do'syou had me going great yarn
Here's another one for you on pointless items of clothing, and that's knickers worn under nurse's scrubs. Some of us old coffin dodgers, as a few of the under 30's who think that they invented sex see us as, can remember the days when nurses uniforms were dresses. However, a little known fact is that they got offered the choice of tights or stockings. Very sexy either way you might think either way, and Ann Summers made a fortune out of the idea. However we are in the 21st century now where nurses scrubs shouldn't come across as fetish wear... Wrong!!! I get the district nurses coming in to see my mum every week, and I can always tell which ones aren't wearing knickers because, the one's who aren't wearing knickers have their scrubs sliding right into the crack of their curvy bums. I get seriously horny watching the girls walking up the driveway, and see their scrubs clinging to the cheeks of their bums showing that they are so obviously not wearing knickers. Pay attention to that detail next time you visit a hospital, and raise your glasses and give a cheer to those gorgeous nurses with the curvy bums who prefer not to wear underwear. "
Best advert ever for 'private healthcare', oooh Matron!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Flip flops. I mean really what is the bloody point.
Yes crocs might be ugly but I see a use for them, regarding use in surgical theatres, but what use is a flip flop besides as a make shift device to conduct some spanking.., |
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"Kilts and a fucking sporran….
Red won't agree."
Neither would I agree, and if he had pulled the number of times that I have at different events, and in hotels abroad at Christmas and New Year as a result of wearing full highland dress, then he'd be the first one to get kitted out, and never leave home without one. On the other hand though, we all know that wherever you go wearing a kilt, there's always women, especially abroad who feel the need to investigate what's underneath the kilt. This leads me to believe that negative comments about kilts are coming from Wee Willy Shrinkie's who wouldn't dare wear one for having to face the humiliation of having a manhood that looks like something off a winkle stall. |
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"Sports bras where you have to take it off like a top.
I made that mistake and had to buy one with a zip down the front the next day.
I wasn't going to dislocate my shoulders trying to peel that off myself every time I wore it.
Aren't some of them horrendous! It's a workout in itself just getting them on and off."
Yes I agree! But on the other hand sports bras that don't hold anything in place and result in me wearing an actual bra underneath- absolutely pointless!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sports bras where you have to take it off like a top.
I made that mistake and had to buy one with a zip down the front the next day.
I wasn't going to dislocate my shoulders trying to peel that off myself every time I wore it.
Aren't some of them horrendous! It's a workout in itself just getting them on and off.
Yes I agree! But on the other hand sports bras that don't hold anything in place and result in me wearing an actual bra underneath- absolutely pointless! "
Her ladyship no longer wears sports bras with a front zip after I had to help her winch the two halves together mid run when her zip came undone and her boobs made a run for it.
Mr |
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"A jacket without a hood...when you live in Scotland umbrellas are no good when it's blowing a hooley outside!
All of your clothes are pointless...take them all off  "
Oh thanks lovely  but I could say the same about you! |
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"Sports bras where you have to take it off like a top.
I made that mistake and had to buy one with a zip down the front the next day.
I wasn't going to dislocate my shoulders trying to peel that off myself every time I wore it.
Aren't some of them horrendous! It's a workout in itself just getting them on and off.
Yes I agree! But on the other hand sports bras that don't hold anything in place and result in me wearing an actual bra underneath- absolutely pointless!
Her ladyship no longer wears sports bras with a front zip after I had to help her winch the two halves together mid run when her zip came undone and her boobs made a run for it.
Mr"
Oh god I could only imagine! Hope you used your head as measurement tool to ensure they were close enough together   |
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