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By *X2019 OP Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
Had a laugh in the past doing this so thought I'd start another.
Reminder of how it works:
1)Someone makes a wish (sexual or non-sexual).
2)The next poster ruins it by adding to the end of the statement above, and leaves their wish for the next person to ruin.
3) Repeat, and watch out for people replying and destroying dreams at the same time haha.
I'll make a start with the classic wish for someone to ruin.
I wish I could win the lottery... |
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"You can't go somewhere warm you can go on a ski-ing holiday instead or stay In Newcastle in the cold instead!
Wish I had some dinner...   "
Your dinner is an E.coli fest and Boots are all out of Imodium 
I wish I could spend Christmas on a quiet beach  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Christmas is cancelled …. Forever.
I wish I wasn’t so grumpy today. "
Your grumpy mood is replaced by abject terror from spider/snake/clown or whatever scares the crap out of you.
I wish I didn't have to wait for the Indian takeaway to open.
Mr |
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"I wish I didn't have to wait for the Indian takeaway to open.
Mr"
You'll wish it hadn't opened at all after having to get Mrs to put some toilet rolls in the fridge while you spend all night in the loo...
I wish it was law for all women to wear stockings at all times... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I wish I didn't have to wait for the Indian takeaway to open.
Mr
You'll wish it hadn't opened at all after having to get Mrs to put some toilet rolls in the fridge while you spend all night in the loo...
I wish it was law for all women to wear stockings at all times..."
Granted, it's the same pair at all times.
I wish for Man United to win the Champions League this season |
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"I wish I didn't have to wait for the Indian takeaway to open.
Mr
You'll wish it hadn't opened at all after having to get Mrs to put some toilet rolls in the fridge while you spend all night in the loo...
I wish it was law for all women to wear stockings at all times..."
The law is passed but on the proviso that all men are cock caged until the stockings are off....
I wish I had paid time off every winter, like hibernation time... |
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"I wish I didn't have to wait for the Indian takeaway to open.
Mr
You'll wish it hadn't opened at all after having to get Mrs to put some toilet rolls in the fridge while you spend all night in the loo...
I wish it was law for all women to wear stockings at all times...
Granted, it's the same pair at all times.
I wish for Man United to win the Champions League this season"
Not happening. Unless they agree to play wearing thongs and crop tops only...
See above for my wish... |
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By *X2019 OP Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
You get your paid time off over winter. However your hibernation time consists of constantly sleeping from November till March so you miss Christmas
I wish I was in the company of a hot fwb right now....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You get your paid time off over winter. However your hibernation time consists of constantly sleeping from November till March so you miss Christmas
I wish I was in the company of a hot fwb right now....
"
You’re in the company of a hot fwb but she’s on her period.
I wish I could drive. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You get your paid time off over winter. However your hibernation time consists of constantly sleeping from November till March so you miss Christmas
I wish I was in the company of a hot fwb right now....
You’re in the company of a hot fwb but she’s on her period.
I wish I could drive. "
Granted but you're limited to driving 30mph max
I wish my sore throat would piss off  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You get your paid time off over winter. However your hibernation time consists of constantly sleeping from November till March so you miss Christmas
I wish I was in the company of a hot fwb right now....
You’re in the company of a hot fwb but she’s on her period.
I wish I could drive.
Granted but you're limited to driving 30mph max
I wish my sore throat would piss off "
You’re sore throat is gone but you’ve got to go to a kids party and now you’ll get a headache |
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"You get your paid time off over winter. However your hibernation time consists of constantly sleeping from November till March so you miss Christmas
I wish I was in the company of a hot fwb right now....
You’re in the company of a hot fwb but she’s on her period.
I wish I could drive.
Granted but you're limited to driving 30mph max
I wish my sore throat would piss off "
You sore throat can piss off but now you've got diarrhea.
I wish I had a super yacht. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You get your paid time off over winter. However your hibernation time consists of constantly sleeping from November till March so you miss Christmas
I wish I was in the company of a hot fwb right now....
You’re in the company of a hot fwb but she’s on her period.
I wish I could drive.
Granted but you're limited to driving 30mph max
I wish my sore throat would piss off
You sore throat can piss off but now you've got diarrhea.
I wish I had a super yacht. "
You’ve got your yacht but it’s a model one rather than life size.
I wish I could eat without getting fat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wish I could time travel....
You wished that next year...
I wish I didn't have to keep ruining people's wishes..."
Tough shit, keep going.
I wish I was a bat |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wish I could time travel....
You wished that next year...
I wish I didn't have to keep ruining people's wishes...
Tough shit, keep going.
I wish I was a bat "
You’re a bat…
Batshit crazy. 
I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair. (Joke)
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wish I could time travel....
You wished that next year...
I wish I didn't have to keep ruining people's wishes...
Tough shit, keep going.
I wish I was a bat
You’re a bat…
Batshit crazy.
I wish I was a punk rocker with flowers in my hair. (Joke)
"
You now have bees swarming around you.
I wish I could have a lifetime supply of doughnuts to cash in at my leisure |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Granted. But you only get the ingredients and have to make them yourself.
I wish I had a large garden"
Lots of work to keep up with and not time to do it!
I wish I had a tank |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Granted. But you only get the ingredients and have to make them yourself.
I wish I had a large garden"
It's a large litterbox for neighbouring cats. That's for depriving me of my doughnuts!
I wish I had a personal baker to bake my doughnuts |
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By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago
Beds (or anywhere beginning with B..!?) |
"
I wish I had a personal baker to bake my doughnuts "
You can, but doughnuts are all you can eat forever!
I wish I could relive my 20s using the wisdom from my 40s... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The tank is a fish tank full of piranhas.
The personal baker bakes doughnuts filled with chilli and goats cheese.
I wish my bras fit me the way they used to"
They now fit you perfectly but your not allowed to wear anything else.
Wish this cold would finally go |
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"Wish this cold would finally go
Granted but now you have some weird green stuff dripping out of your ass
I wish all the hot women on strictly had to dance naked"
Giovanni is dancing naked with Aljaz 
I wish I could retire early |
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"
I wish I could retire early
You can retire early but you can never go out ever again...
I wish there was teleportation to be able to go anywhere instantly "
wherever you ask for, you are taken to the complete opposite request |
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