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Does sex go downhill after having children?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We all hope it doesn't but you have to realistic.
I'd say it depends entirely on the dynamics of couple's relationship, the demands of life in general as kids do put a strain on parents'energies. Communication is key. |
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I think for most people there is definitely less opportunity and when you do get it, it tends to be quick. I know when my two were young sex wasn’t my priority. It wasn’t that I went off sex, it just wasn’t something I thought about that much. When we had time on our own we were doing practical stuff or just chilling out together more.
It’s a lot different know they are a bit older. Time can still be the issue but we take every little opportunity we get. I have found the last few years I’ve had more time to focus on myself and enjoy my life more in many ways including sex.
Kx |
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You have to alter your expectations once you have children.
From daily sex to yearly 
Seriously it's about patience and understanding.
But it's possible to still have a good sex life but it's about being opportunistic. |
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There are loads of dynamics in play that could affect this.. tiredness, opportunity, qualities in your partner, good or bad, that you haven’t seen before that you now prize or resent, the effect of the birth on both parties, physical changes and psychological changes, postnatal depression (for both parties). Overall that all sounds quite negative but could also have positive outcomes depending on different factors and the people involved |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are loads of dynamics in play that could affect this.. tiredness, opportunity, qualities in your partner, good or bad, that you haven’t seen before that you now prize or resent, the effect of the birth on both parties, physical changes and psychological changes, postnatal depression (for both parties). Overall that all sounds quite negative but could also have positive outcomes depending on different factors and the people involved "
Great answer xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No heh. I started having vaginal orgasms more intensely and became more confident. After first one when I had (forced on me) episiotomy it has been bit painful for few months but pleased to report that's gone away. I had a quick recovery after next and never looked back since.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Initially it does, but as the kids get older. Then things start to pick back up. I think you become a lot more open with each other and less self conscious. More like finding one another again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When I sat down with the ex and we decided not to have kids, it was a great weight off my mind. But I was not sure what we were gonna do with them and when to tell them… |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I sat down with the ex and we decided not to have kids, it was a great weight off my mind. But I was not sure what we were gonna do with them and when to tell them…"
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Question I have for men who resent their partners for lack of sex after having a child.
If your dick got ripped open, had to be stitched back up, or emergency surgery in a lot of cases, your body changed dramatically for over a year, your life changed forever and you were on a roller coaster of emotions as a result of having sex, would you be wanting to jump straight back into having sex again or would you be cautious and be yearning for understanding and support?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Question I have for men who resent their partners for lack of sex after having a child.
If your dick got ripped open, had to be stitched back up, or emergency surgery in a lot of cases, your body changed dramatically for over a year, your life changed forever and you were on a roller coaster of emotions as a result of having sex, would you be wanting to jump straight back into having sex again or would you be cautious and be yearning for understanding and support?
"
If a guy resents his partner for having their baby he needs his dick cut off with rusty scissors. |
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"Question I have for men who resent their partners for lack of sex after having a child.
If your dick got ripped open, had to be stitched back up, or emergency surgery in a lot of cases, your body changed dramatically for over a year, your life changed forever and you were on a roller coaster of emotions as a result of having sex, would you be wanting to jump straight back into having sex again or would you be cautious and be yearning for understanding and support?
If a guy resents his partner for having their baby he needs his dick cut off with rusty scissors. "
Seen it on here time after time. "My wife has gone off sex, it's unfair, that's why I'm here" only to find out she's not long since given birth. |
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"Question I have for men who resent their partners for lack of sex after having a child.
If your dick got ripped open, had to be stitched back up, or emergency surgery in a lot of cases, your body changed dramatically for over a year, your life changed forever and you were on a roller coaster of emotions as a result of having sex, would you be wanting to jump straight back into having sex again or would you be cautious and be yearning for understanding and support?
If a guy resents his partner for having their baby he needs his dick cut off with rusty scissors. "
I remember aged 18, a guy I knew gave me a lift home one night, we got jiggy.
I said "I didn't realise you and XXXXX had split up" (yes, that's how naive I was) and he replied "we haven't, she's pregnant and not giving me any, why else would I be here?"
I felt like a dirty stupid fool and guilty as hell. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I remember aged 18, a guy I knew gave me a lift home one night, we got jiggy.
I said "I didn't realise you and XXXXX had split up" (yes, that's how naive I was) and he replied "we haven't, she's pregnant and not giving me any, why else would I be here?"
I felt like a dirty stupid fool and guilty as hell."
Wasn't your fault the guy was a sleeze |
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It’s a big adjustment to make .Being tired all the time being emotional body changes .That’s where it helps to have 2 people on the same page and talk through it all together and make time for each other as that’s very important also. |
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By *8v3nCouple
over a year ago
Coventry |
"Your thoughts/ experience?  "
Not really. It requires a bit of effort to plan for everything, but on flipside getting naughtier and thinking.. why we haven't done it earlier.
Fire always is on for us. |
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O.P.
What do you mean by 'down hill' .... ?
That's a serious question.
I don't know what you mean by 'down hill'
Change is inevitable..... down hill is very subjective.
What's happened for you to ask ? |
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"Question I have for men who resent their partners for lack of sex after having a child.
If your dick got ripped open, had to be stitched back up, or emergency surgery in a lot of cases, your body changed dramatically for over a year, your life changed forever and you were on a roller coaster of emotions as a result of having sex, would you be wanting to jump straight back into having sex again or would you be cautious and be yearning for understanding and support?
If a guy resents his partner for having their baby he needs his dick cut off with rusty scissors.
I remember aged 18, a guy I knew gave me a lift home one night, we got jiggy.
I said "I didn't realise you and XXXXX had split up" (yes, that's how naive I was) and he replied "we haven't, she's pregnant and not giving me any, why else would I be here?"
I felt like a dirty stupid fool and guilty as hell."
'not giving me any' ......  phrases like tell all about attitudes....
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Our sexlife is actually getting better year on year...  I can imagine as our children start to enter there teens and become a little more sexually aware we may have to calm down somewhat...
But on the other hand when they become old enough that they can take care of themselves then we can certainly take our fun on the road for a few hours |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You learn to fuck quietly
This is so true Unless you have a shit, noisy mattress lkke mine right now  
Going for a drive after dark is an option "
That's what my wife & I did. Get somebody to watch the kids while we go late night shopping |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a much better sex life now than I did before I had a child. But I don't think that's due to having a child, I just think sex is something that gets better as we grow older and understand our needs more.
I do think having a child changes your sex life in ways and quite often it's something women lose interest in but I completely understand why and see myself as fortunate that I haven't felt that way. If having a child has changed me, it's more so in a way I've learned to be quiet and quick. |
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