FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Would you feel insulted if…

Would you feel insulted if…

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

To put into context, another guy that I’ve previously had dealings with has recently boomeranged back to me which puts my return rate to a clean 100% which I declined the offer. But then came the why’s and the sorry’s and bollocks. I told them that they would be good boyfriend material but not someone I’d want to have a one off fuck with.

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

For a one off fuck I want a guy that will piss in my mouth, let me stick my tongue up his arse and fuck him with a strap on. I just wouldn’t want a boyfriend who would want to do those things to me.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

My first ever Fab meet was a social. The girl said that if she was looking for a fella she'd consider me for a second date but as she was looking to have someone fuck her brains out, she said no. Since then I've learned, less chit chat, just piss in her mouth and rim her arse.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I understand what ur saying

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By *agneto.Man over a year ago

Bham

Just the way it is. Lots of women fuck around with the bad boys and settle down with the decent guys.

Same as some guys would have sex with some women but wouldn't date them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Nope. Can’t relate to that (mr).

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I’d take the opposite as an insult: namely that I’d be good enough for a shag, but not to have a relationship with.

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By *rMojoRisinMan over a year ago

Sheffield

"I’d take the opposite as an insult: namely that I’d be good enough for a shag, but not to have a relationship with."

Fancy a shag?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’d take the opposite as an insult: namely that I’d be good enough for a shag, but not to have a relationship with.

Fancy a shag?

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By *ndreisabelCouple over a year ago

wigan

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

Doesn't make sense to me. I need a guy that's is compatible with me in a relationship (same goals, principles, etc..) but also sexualy. Obviously the perfect match is almost impossible but as close as possible to it.

Isabel

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By *rMojoRisinMan over a year ago

Sheffield

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

Isabel"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

Well you’re absolutely amazing looking so I’d be delighted if you told me that you consider me relationship material and equally delighted if you considered me on off fuck material. I’m pretty sure there’s absolutely no chance you’d consider me worthy of either and I’d completely understand that as someone who looks as incredible as you do can do way, way better than me.

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple over a year ago

Basingstoke

"For a one off fuck I want a guy that will piss in my mouth, let me stick my tongue up his arse and fuck him with a strap on. I just wouldn’t want a boyfriend who would want to do those things to me.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

Honestly... no. But you do you.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

Isabel"

I wouldn’t want a boyfriend who would want to piss in my face or do sexually degrading things to me or me to him. Just feel like it would be a lack of respect thing.

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By *y Favorite PornstarCouple over a year ago

Basingstoke

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

Isabel

I wouldn’t want a boyfriend who would want to piss in my face or do sexually degrading things to me or me to him. Just feel like it would be a lack of respect thing. "

Sounds like you have the Madonna–whore complex...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What do I know, as I’m a boring fucker who doesn’t really have kinks like that! But I would imagine that if you’re both happy in the situation, then it wouldn’t be disrespectful. I suppose the trick is to find someone who ticks all the compatibility boxes, and that’s no easy feat at the best of times!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

You should tell him this, even if it's just for the shock value and to see the expression on his face lol. Seriously though, you never know, he might just be game and you could have the best of both worlds....

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By *olourpurpleMan over a year ago

Waterford

" Doesn't make sense to me. I need a guy that's is compatible with me in a relationship (same goals, principles, etc..) but also sexualy. Obviously the perfect match is almost impossible but as close as possible to it.

Isabel"

I’d be more in line with this where I’d be looking for someone who is a match in all departments. I wouldn’t see it as a negative if we both liked something unusual.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So he's a one of fuck then but not someone you would want to date?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"So he's a one of fuck then but not someone you would want to date?"

No. The opposite.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So he's a one of fuck then but not someone you would want to date?

No. The opposite. "

Is it the kid from the warehouse who has a wife abroad?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So he's a one of fuck then but not someone you would want to date?

No. The opposite. "

When you said you had ‘dealings’ with him, do you mean you had sex with him?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"So he's a one of fuck then but not someone you would want to date?

No. The opposite.

Is it the kid from the warehouse who has a wife abroad?"

Oh god not him. Although he also has tried to come back. He didn’t have a wife abroad either. He’s a 23 year old child. We’re strictly friends. I put that down to stupidity on my part.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So he's a one of fuck then but not someone you would want to date?

No. The opposite.

Is it the kid from the warehouse who has a wife abroad?

Oh god not him. Although he also has tried to come back. He didn’t have a wife abroad either. He’s a 23 year old child. We’re strictly friends. I put that down to stupidity on my part. "

Oh, I thought he had a child and a wife. You have too many stories and experiences teabgs I'm getting lost!

Which guy is this guy then

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"So he's a one of fuck then but not someone you would want to date?

No. The opposite.

Is it the kid from the warehouse who has a wife abroad?

Oh god not him. Although he also has tried to come back. He didn’t have a wife abroad either. He’s a 23 year old child. We’re strictly friends. I put that down to stupidity on my part.

Oh, I thought he had a child and a wife. You have too many stories and experiences teabgs I'm getting lost!

Which guy is this guy then

The guy is irrelevant it’s the content I wanted to discuss not the person.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So he's a one of fuck then but not someone you would want to date?

No. The opposite.

Is it the kid from the warehouse who has a wife abroad?

Oh god not him. Although he also has tried to come back. He didn’t have a wife abroad either. He’s a 23 year old child. We’re strictly friends. I put that down to stupidity on my part.

Oh, I thought he had a child and a wife. You have too many stories and experiences teabgs I'm getting lost!

Which guy is this guy then

The guy is irrelevant it’s the content I wanted to discuss not the person."

Did you have sexy with him? You say you had ‘dealings’ with him and he ‘boomeranged’ back to you which I’m assuming mean you had sex with him although it’s not totally clear whether you did or not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What does it matter? If she wanted to reply to that question, she’d have done it the first time you asked.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I agree with you actually, I'd categorise into 'would fuck'/'would date', but I'd hate to be on the receiving end of someone else saying it. It'd make me feel like I was about as sexy as a granny cardigan when I'd want to be stockings and suspenders.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"What does it matter? If she wanted to reply to that question, she’d have done it the first time you asked."

I thought she may have missed the first time I asked.

Well, she’s saying she wouldn’t consider him for a one off fuck so it’s a bit of a contradiction if she’s had a one off fuck with him.

Unless I’m missing something?

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By *aylonMan over a year ago

Earlsfield

I think you should be able to go there with your life partner, that's a sexy life bond. The girl I end up with we'll do allsorts of crazy shit, rimming would be standard and I'm definitely pissing on her body during a mad freaky night

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

Isabel

I wouldn’t want a boyfriend who would want to piss in my face or do sexually degrading things to me or me to him. Just feel like it would be a lack of respect thing. "

Totally make sense!!!!!

Like I think boyfriend material and somebody you can have the dirtiest/nastiest sex with don’t particularly

Mix either.

Okay you can have amazing sex with your boyfriend but I also would see him differently to “dirty” sex.

Like If I was in the mood of something very filthy and carnal with a hot guy that I barely know.

It’s kinda like wanting/needing that DISGUSTING but so good greasy take away at 4am after a night out where you basically d*unk everything, including the clubs toilet water

I get you Annie

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just the way it is. Lots of women fuck around with the bad boys and settle down with the decent guys.

Same as some guys would have sex with some women but wouldn't date them. "

Or plainly are silly bitches like myself and still try settle down with the bad boys and end up in messy situations. Still me…. *insert clown gif*

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just the way it is. Lots of women fuck around with the bad boys and settle down with the decent guys.

Same as some guys would have sex with some women but wouldn't date them.

Or plainly are silly bitches like myself and still try settle down with the bad boys and end up in messy situations. Still me…. *insert clown gif*

"
well it's because you're attractive and bad boys love the way you look

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’d take the opposite as an insult: namely that I’d be good enough for a shag, but not to have a relationship with."

This is all I get nowadays

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By *yesgreenMan over a year ago

north and south

"I’d take the opposite as an insult: namely that I’d be good enough for a shag, but not to have a relationship with.

This is all I get nowadays

"
I agree the lady you have the best sexual chemistry with , You can’t always agree the tedious stuff , Not saying that about everyone!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just the way it is. Lots of women fuck around with the bad boys and settle down with the decent guys.

Same as some guys would have sex with some women but wouldn't date them.

Or plainly are silly bitches like myself and still try settle down with the bad boys and end up in messy situations. Still me…. *insert clown gif*

well it's because you're attractive and bad boys love the way you look "

They just know they can take advantage of me being too nice .. and I let them because I think I can change them …. x

thanks btw x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just the way it is. Lots of women fuck around with the bad boys and settle down with the decent guys.

Same as some guys would have sex with some women but wouldn't date them.

Or plainly are silly bitches like myself and still try settle down with the bad boys and end up in messy situations. Still me…. *insert clown gif*

well it's because you're attractive and bad boys love the way you look

They just know they can take advantage of me being too nice .. and I let them because I think I can change them …. x

thanks btw x

I’m 20 years your senior and am still making the mistake of being too nice and thinking I can change them

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’d take the opposite as an insult: namely that I’d be good enough for a shag, but not to have a relationship with."

Sort of this (although it would depend on how it was explained/phrased as to how insulted I would be), but I get the thinking. Sometimes a bit of wild does a person good, but its not what you'd want all the time.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

Makes sense to me, I feel the same. Like I would 100% love to get down and utterly nasty with someone like you for a night...but in all honesty I wouldn't go back for more and I definitely wouldn't want to try and make a gf out of a girl like you.

I mean this with absolutely no disrespect to you or anyone else, I'm sure you're a lovely gal and all that...it's more an issue with me I guess, like after all the nasty filthy fucking, I wouldn't be able to see you as anything but that,a naughty filthy good time girl I had enjoyed some dark desires with. Someone to remain friends with if reciprocated but no more.

The opposite is also true, if I'm in a loving relationship with a girl then I wouldn't want to do the 'nasty out there' stuff with her as, whether right or wrong,it would definitely change the way I see her and maybe more to the point it would change the way I think she would see me...almost as if I'd tainted the relationship with dark desires akin to opening pandoras box I guess.

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two seperate and I just can't combine them

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By *azylivingMan over a year ago

random location

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

Yes /no

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By *orksRockerMan over a year ago

Bradford

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two seperate and I just can't combine them

I think you and OP are heading for a bad relationship then..

Its implying that you like/want/need those sexual aspects but wouldn't want to do those things with your partner, so over time, you'll begin to miss them and go outside the relationship to get them.

If you can't be intimate and honest on every aspect with the one you profess to care about the most, who can you be?

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By *orksRockerMan over a year ago

Bradford

And 'yes', I'd be insulted but I wouldn't continue with someone so shallow. The friendship would end there.

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By *annaBeStrongMan over a year ago

wokingham

Not insulted but not interested

I’m not interested being the “safe” guy on the side while you think of someone else during sex

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"My first ever Fab meet was a social. The girl said that if she was looking for a fella she'd consider me for a second date but as she was looking to have someone fuck her brains out, she said no. Since then I've learned, less chit chat, just piss in her mouth and rim her arse. "

Always the gentleman

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By *a LunaWoman over a year ago

South Wales

I’d want a boyfriend who WOULD do that/be into that. Nothing better than shit hot, exciting, never knowing what is on the cards kind of sex!

Sex is supposed to be about fun. Relationships should happen organically and respect, trust etc should be a key component that grows the longer you are together as a team. Sex should be how you like it, within agreed boundaries.

But I personally don’t categorise my sex life by wether I’m dating or just having a one night stand. My feelings and emotions, yes, but not the sex.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well this is a swingers site so it sort of makes sense . Dull boring boyfriend at home and sexual demon's on the side . Of course ever time you had sex with the boyfriend your probably think something is missing and end up dumping him eventually for a kinky boyfriend who your more compatible with . As for all the pissing and degrading type stuff in my limited experience the more respect and trust you have for your partner the better it is and the further you can push it x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

The power of playing with people your way - sounds like you haven't the minerals to persuade him to think/do kink degradation......

Don't underestimate that with time, people away from here, will experiment some way or another and adapt because they like you!

Depends how patient you are to wait and see!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’d want a boyfriend who WOULD do that/be into that. Nothing better than shit hot, exciting, never knowing what is on the cards kind of sex!

But I personally don’t categorise my sex life by wether I’m dating or just having a one night stand. My feelings and emotions, yes, but not the sex.

I agree with this. What’s the point of having a boyfriend who doesn’t satisfy you sexually? Won’t you be looking for that elsewhere?

You need to have a mutual starting point, and then grow from there.

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By *an4funMan over a year ago

london

"Not insulted but not interested

I’m not interested being the “safe” guy on the side while you think of someone else during sex "

This is what I was thinking.

Op, your desires and kinks won't go away when you meet and have a relationship with Mr Nice. So when you are in the mood for drinking piss etc what then? Have a one off with Mr Bad on a night out while Mr Nice sits at home babysitting?

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By *annaBeStrongMan over a year ago

wokingham

"Not insulted but not interested

I’m not interested being the “safe” guy on the side while you think of someone else during sex

This is what I was thinking.

Infidelity is my biggest fear in a relationship and posts like this make me wonder if relationships are even worth it anymore

Your either the bad boy she wants to fuck or the provider that sits at home while she’s on a “girls night out” looking for excitement. And I don’t think I’m the bad boy

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By *hrista BellendWoman over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Makes total sense Annie

Swinging and kinks are all about being enrichment to your sexual life, they don't have to BE your sexual life

Find a nice boyfriend to love and cherish and a few sexual deviants to play with

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Relationships are a waste of time if you aren't willing to be patient and find out about each other.

People are in a hurry these days and won't take their time on a journey of discovery!(experimenting etc)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’d want a boyfriend who WOULD do that/be into that. Nothing better than shit hot, exciting, never knowing what is on the cards kind of sex!

But I personally don’t categorise my sex life by wether I’m dating or just having a one night stand. My feelings and emotions, yes, but not the sex.

I know and ideally that’s true but there’s some really kinky shit that I don’t know if my brain can handle and merge the two…

It’s like compartmentalise… so I can have amazing sex with my bf but not too too freaky stuff that my brain goes like… okay this is borderline stuff you do with a hotty u barely know and you are being a total fucking hoe.

I’m probably doing it wrong but I see what Annie means and I used to/do kinda the same

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By *ools and the brainCouple over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

It's possible to have both.

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

This is so one of those posts where if a man had posted it ……..

Why would you not want a boyfriend who did those things though? What are the reasons?

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By *ackandtheunicornCouple over a year ago

liverpool

I don't understand why you wouldn't want filthy dirty sex with your boyfriend, why wouldn't you want that on tap if that's what you're into? I don't get get it. Why date someone who's nice but not really sexually compatible? Mr

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By *essie.Woman over a year ago

Serendipity

"This is so one of those posts where if a man had posted it ……..

Yep he would have got ripped to pieces.

I don’t have a answer, but I’ve had relationships with what I’d class as kinky sex involved.

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By *anilla switchWoman over a year ago

Hampshire

Bookmarking this thread

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate. "

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Remember that guy I was meeting end of 2017 for a few months. He actually said to me “I wish I met you on a night out and not here”. When I questioned him on that he said I’d be the perfect girlfriend but he couldn’t get over the fact I’m on a fuck site with pictures of my tits for all to see!

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate.

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

You’re still right though, he’s a closed minded dick head

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate.

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

Oh it is a common belief with some men. They probably wouldn’t admit it on here but it is with a lot of them. It’s easy to suss those sort out too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate.

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

Exactly, and sometimes you can’t wash that stain off you no matter what you do. Especially when it comes to people who do Etero normal things and would see the world of swinging or crazy sex as too much to handle.

I myself would struggle to agree to a relationship with someone on here who loves sex parties etc because I’d think I’d never keep up and what if he misses those days etc etc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" I need a guy that's is compatible with me in a relationship (same goals, principles, etc..) but also sexualy. Obviously the perfect match is almost impossible but as close as possible to it.

Isabel"

^ this. However, I too, would be insulted that I'd not be good relationship material and only good enough for sex.

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By *acey_RedWoman over a year ago

Liverpool

Personally no. If those were my kinks, I'd want them in a relationship too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But as casual fun where you know where you/they stand?

Hell yes!!

I see this super fit guy who clearly get so much vagina it’s disgusting, best sex ever.. but I’d not trust him to even let him go fetch me a Capuccino from the local Nero…

So it’s so not boyfriend material.. (and he’s like the hottest and nicest guy too!!)

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By *acey_RedWoman over a year ago

Liverpool

"Personally no. If those were my kinks, I'd want them in a relationship too. "

Sorry I meant no I can't relate.

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By *annaBeStrongMan over a year ago

wokingham

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate.

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

You’re still right though, he’s a closed minded dick head "

Isn’t he doing exactly what this thread is about? Choosing a patterned based on what they do sexually?

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By *ools and the brainCouple over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

" I need a guy that's is compatible with me in a relationship (same goals, principles, etc..) but also sexualy. Obviously the perfect match is almost impossible but as close as possible to it.

Isabel

^ this. However, I too, would be insulted that I'd not be good relationship material and only good enough for sex. "

From our experience there's plenty of men who are happy to be "only good enough for sex"

And not a relationship.

They can live out fantasies then go back to their partners and carry on with vanilla life.

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By *dam1971Man over a year ago

Bedford

Run your relationship as you want (I agree that getting kink on tap is a good thing) , but why didn’t you tell him the truth and ask him what he wants?

Are you afraid of finding someone who can be a great boyfriend as well as a good fuck, and you can’t make it work?

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By *an4funMan over a year ago

london

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate.

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

Oh it is a common belief with some men. They probably wouldn’t admit it on here but it is with a lot of them. It’s easy to suss those sort out too. "

That would make the OP a dickhead too then wouldn't it?

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate.

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

Oh it is a common belief with some men. They probably wouldn’t admit it on here but it is with a lot of them. It’s easy to suss those sort out too.

That would make the OP a dickhead too then wouldn't it?"

I didn’t call anyone a dickhead!

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By *an4funMan over a year ago

london

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate.

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

Oh it is a common belief with some men. They probably wouldn’t admit it on here but it is with a lot of them. It’s easy to suss those sort out too.

That would make the OP a dickhead too then wouldn't it?

I didn’t call anyone a dickhead!"

Ok, whatever you mean by "those sort" then surely not that will apply to the OP too

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate.

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

Oh it is a common belief with some men. They probably wouldn’t admit it on here but it is with a lot of them. It’s easy to suss those sort out too.

That would make the OP a dickhead too then wouldn't it?

I didn’t call anyone a dickhead!

Ok, whatever you mean by "those sort" then surely not that will apply to the OP too"

Don’t know yet which is why I asked her the question above as to why.

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two separate.

This is such a perfect answer to explain why I feel the way I do.

In a perfect world of course you’d be able to do everything with both, but outside the world of swinging many guys have the above view.

You can’t look at this with your swinging hat on. If you can watch your partner literally fuck another person of course everything in between is gonna be ok.

But your average guy from the real world, not okay.

Now I thought that was the isolated view of a closed minded dick head but it’s quite a common belief.

Oh it is a common belief with some men. They probably wouldn’t admit it on here but it is with a lot of them. It’s easy to suss those sort out too.

That would make the OP a dickhead too then wouldn't it?

I didn’t call anyone a dickhead!

Ok, whatever you mean by "those sort" then surely not that will apply to the OP too

Don’t know yet which is why I asked her the question above as to why. "

You saying it’s not then? Just a few examples :

If I wanted vanilla I can get that at home.

How can people fall in love on fab!

I could never have a relationship with someone from fab.

“It’s purely a sex site”

Those sort ^^

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I may separate out would date/would fuck but it writing be based on different criteria. Someone could be fun to fuck but (for example) I know would say annoy or frustrate me longer term.

I don't understand the idea of wanting kink from a fuck that you wouldn't want from a partner. Don't get me wrong, a great deal of our sex life is plain vanilla but one of the best things about her ladyship is that absolutely nothing is off the table when it comes to talking about/acting out our fantasies.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Makes sense to me. Different people work for different kinds of sex things.

Relationship for one type of sex and a one night fuck for the other stuff.

I think I would be offended. Good enough for boring relationship sex but not good enough for the wild stuff.

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By *ackandtheunicornCouple over a year ago

liverpool

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

For whatever reason,my mind wants to keep the two seperate and I just can't combine them

I think you and OP are heading for a bad relationship then..

Its implying that you like/want/need those sexual aspects but wouldn't want to do those things with your partner, so over time, you'll begin to miss them and go outside the relationship to get them.

If you can't be intimate and honest on every aspect with the one you profess to care about the most, who can you be? "

I agree with this 100%. Makes no sense to have a partner you can't be 100% sexually compatible and honest with.

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By *ookie46Woman over a year ago

Deepest darkest Peru

"Personally no. If those were my kinks, I'd want them in a relationship too. "

This

Also every time you were intimate say in the relationship would you be wanting him to piss in your mouth etc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Op. If I wanted to do all of that to a woman I’d be expected to have it done to me.

If you can’t take it, you can’t give it.

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Op. If I wanted to do all of that to a woman I’d be expected to have it done to me.

If you can’t take it, you can’t give it. "

To be fair you actually can. People can want what they want on here. Whether they get it or not is different but there’s no rules that say you have to give what you take.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Op. If I wanted to do all of that to a woman I’d be expected to have it done to me.

If you can’t take it, you can’t give it. "

Yes you can. As long as there’s consent, anything goes. I like things done to me that I don’t want to do, and vice versa.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don’t understand why you can’t have both from the same person… a dirty one night fuck do everything you want situation and a loving relationship…I think they’re extremely difficult to find, but the emotional bond and trust you get is immense.

You’re a long time married/ together ( or that’s how it’s meant to be)… starting off with someone you know might not be all you want sexually is not great - that’s why there’s so many married folks without their partners on here!!

Other scenario… if the guys good in every other way… you don’t know that he might not enjoy whatever you want to do… just might be afraid to bring it up… try!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Op. If I wanted to do all of that to a woman I’d be expected to have it done to me.

If you can’t take it, you can’t give it.

To be fair you actually can. People can want what they want on here. Whether they get it or not is different but there’s no rules that say you have to give what you take. "

I’m talking from the op point of view as per being asked about wanting a relationship not just a fuck. Men get it very one sided I think being one myself. If you want to do stuff to your woman then at least let her know your serious by allowing her to do what she wants to you.

After all, you’re in it together aren’t you?

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By *utlongjohnMan over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

Isabel

I wouldn’t want a boyfriend who would want to piss in my face or do sexually degrading things to me or me to him. Just feel like it would be a lack of respect thing. "

I thought this would be perfect? Someone you can truly care about and have a deep meaningful connection with but also live out your dirtiest fantasies aswell.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

Isabel

I wouldn’t want a boyfriend who would want to piss in my face or do sexually degrading things to me or me to him. Just feel like it would be a lack of respect thing.

I thought this would be perfect? Someone you can truly care about and have a deep meaningful connection with but also live out your dirtiest fantasies aswell.

See you get it… I’m thinking the same way.

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By *o new WinksMan over a year ago

BAE

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

The downside to this outlook is that, when you settle with a guy and he doesn't fulfill your darker desires, you will either cheat or split up.

Looks fade, but personality and compatability don't.

So just find a hot guy who wants to piss on you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

For what it’s worth, I understand where the op is coming from.

There was a quote in a film I can’t remember where the guy had a wife and a mistress. When asked why he needed the mistress, he replied “my wife kisses my kids when they go to school!” (I might have paraphrased)

Does he respect her? Should she be flattered You tell me.

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By *uriousscouserWoman over a year ago

Wirral

I'm not looking for a relatuonship, but I think I wouldn't be insulted but also wouldn't be interested. I don't want to be the nice but dull partner sitting at home knowing you were out with other people for your kink fix.

If I'm just the pleasant person you quite like at home that would make me feel like it was more of a friendship than a relationship - I would want a partner where I can explore the seedier side of my sexuality within the trust of a relationship.

If it was a non-monogamous thing and we could both live our fantasies elsewhere before coming together to share experiences that makes a difference.

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By *utlongjohnMan over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

Isabel

I wouldn’t want a boyfriend who would want to piss in my face or do sexually degrading things to me or me to him. Just feel like it would be a lack of respect thing.

I thought this would be perfect? Someone you can truly care about and have a deep meaningful connection with but also live out your dirtiest fantasies aswell.

See you get it… I’m thinking the same way. "

Too right, i would love to meet someone i cared enough about to share my every day life with but also someone who loves all the filthy shit i do without having to hold back.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

This thread isn’t about thinking anyone is more or less than any one. Or finding someone more attractive or less attractive.

It’s my experiences thus far. I’ve been here 11 years and spoken to many men. The men who message me that are seeking fun outside their relationships and behind peoples backs. Men that have approached me because of my interests. I do tell them that I’m only looking for single guys but when I’ve been in the mood for conversation I ask them questions. Take something aa simple as rimming, I say why can’t you aak your wife to do that and I get responses like “I wouldn’t want my wife to stick her tongue up my arse and then kiss my kids goodnight. Or I wouldn’t want to piss over my girlfriend. Or I wouldn’t want to do xyz because I wouldn’t be able to look at her the same.

This isn’t me saying a guy I’d have a relationship wouldn’t be worthy of my doing all my kinks and sexual desires with. This is me adapting and learning from my own experiences. I’d happily wear different hats for a relationship, I could be a filth bag, I could cook a Sunday roast and bake cakes, can be a mum, run a home, make packed lunches, be on the PTA. I can’t help that my experiences of being on here and the thousands of men that I’ve interacted with, not necessarily from meeting but through messages, reading forum contributions, just being aware of mens views, it’s brought me to how I feel today. That men do struggle to separate someone they’d make a girlfriend from someone they’d just have a filthy fuck with.

So the ideal would be to have a partner that WOULD do every single kinky thing I’m into but I think it’s too hard to find.

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By *dam1971Man over a year ago

Bedford

"So the ideal would be to have a partner that WOULD do every single kinky thing I’m into but I think it’s too hard to find. "

That makes more sense.

Sounds like you’ve met a lot of the wrong guys, I get that it makes you question yourself after a while

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"This thread isn’t about thinking anyone is more or less than any one. Or finding someone more attractive or less attractive.

So the ideal would be to have a partner that WOULD do every single kinky thing I’m into but I think it’s too hard to find. "

I think you explained it better there than you did in your op

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I would never have sex with a woman who I wouldn't consider suitable for a relationship/dating. I have to like her as a person. The fact that I may not be looking for a relationship/dating, just sex (ie fwb) is another matter. Is that fucked up?..

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"I would never have sex with a woman who I wouldn't consider suitable for a relationship/dating. I have to like her as a person. The fact that I may not be looking for a relationship/dating, just sex (ie fwb) is another matter. Is that fucked up?..

No that’s kinda how I feel. I’m not looking for a relationship and never will be but it would still and has pissed me off if someone said it’s just a fuck. Each to their own though, plenty people here for that. Tis why I rarely meet.

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By *utlongjohnMan over a year ago

It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

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By *affron40Woman over a year ago

manchester

Same. This thread reinforces the idea that people with kink or comfortable with seeking good sex in any way are less attractive because of it. That’s exactly what I seek from someone I like and want to spend time with. It’s not a ‘fab’ thing. Anyone who think like this is not my cup of tea.

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By *reeneyes1983Man over a year ago

Hyde

"This thread isn’t about thinking anyone is more or less than any one. Or finding someone more attractive or less attractive.

So the ideal would be to have a partner that WOULD do every single kinky thing I’m into but I think it’s too hard to find. "

The last couple of lines here are what heaven must be like....a gorgeous kinky girlfriend who can also bake cakes and have mum thinking she was an angel xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

It’s not as simple as having a shower though is it. For some men once they’ve seen their partner do a certain thing they can’t just shower away that image or how they view them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

It’s not as simple as having a shower though is it. For some men once they’ve seen their partner do a certain thing they can’t just shower away that image or how they view them. "

The maybe they are the wrong man?

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

It’s not as simple as having a shower though is it. For some men once they’ve seen their partner do a certain thing they can’t just shower away that image or how they view them. "

And those some men aren’t my type of men.

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By *dam1971Man over a year ago

Bedford

"It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

It’s not as simple as having a shower though is it. For some men once they’ve seen their partner do a certain thing they can’t just shower away that image or how they view them. "

But that’s because they see those bits of sex as bad or dirty. It’s because they have an immature attitude.

Good, consensual, freeing, wonderful sex isn’t a bad thing. Seeing it that way is controlling

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Unfortunate geography is a real bastard..

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

It’s not as simple as having a shower though is it. For some men once they’ve seen their partner do a certain thing they can’t just shower away that image or how they view them.

But that’s because they see those bits of sex as bad or dirty. It’s because they have an immature attitude.

Good, consensual, freeing, wonderful sex isn’t a bad thing. Seeing it that way is controlling "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Youre such a tease....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

. Take something aa simple as rimming, I say why can’t you aak your wife to do that and I get responses like “I wouldn’t want my wife to stick her tongue up my arse and then kiss my kids goodnight. Or I wouldn’t want to piss over my girlfriend. Or I wouldn’t want to do xyz because I wouldn’t be able to look at her the same.

I’d expect the kids to be in bed before anything like that happens…lol

If you find someone who respects you for you and can embrace your kinky side I’d find that horny as hell and wouldn’t need to go looking anywhere else.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don’t want my cake and eat it… I want to share my cake with someone who is just a weird as me and eat it together, in bed, off each other.

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By *utlongjohnMan over a year ago

"It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

It’s not as simple as having a shower though is it. For some men once they’ve seen their partner do a certain thing they can’t just shower away that image or how they view them. "

I suppose this is true i just cannot get my head around the fact that they obviously see this as degrading perhaps in some way to their baby mother but would be willing to do it some potentially someone elses mum, if that makes sense?

My sex life/kinks and real life are kept totally seperate.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

To go back to my opening post and the guy in question. He’s someone from the real world who I met in quite normal circumstances, who after 2 years of us knowing each other he asked if he could take me out for food which we did, many times, walks as well even went to Thorpe park together then after 6 weeks we started sleeping together and the sex was good. He wasn’t open to rimming though and a couple of other things I suggested he kind of shut them down but I still would have carried on with him and been happy. But he sacked me off. Said his head was all over the place didn’t want a girlfriend yada yada yada. Now 5 months later he pops up again and the tone is he wants sex with me again. Now I don’t ‘just want sex with him’ I don’t want anything from him now, that ship has sailed. BUT if I did just want sex with him I’d want him to do all the filth and sexual kinks that I’m into. So do you see my point? I would’ve had a relationship with him and been satisfied, happy and loyal to him. I wouldn’t feel like I was lacking or missing out on anything because I value love and intimacy more than a kink. I wouldn’t be looking to get my fix from anyone else. But all he wanted and I believe all he’s offering now is a fuck. If I want just a fuck I want it with someone who will tick all my kink boxes.

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By *dam1971Man over a year ago

Bedford

"To go back to my opening post and the guy in question. He’s someone from the real world who I met in quite normal circumstances, who after 2 years of us knowing each other he asked if he could take me out for food which we did, many times, walks as well even went to Thorpe park together then after 6 weeks we started sleeping together and the sex was good. He wasn’t open to rimming though and a couple of other things I suggested he kind of shut them down but I still would have carried on with him and been happy. But he sacked me off. Said his head was all over the place didn’t want a girlfriend yada yada yada. Now 5 months later he pops up again and the tone is he wants sex with me again. Now I don’t ‘just want sex with him’ I don’t want anything from him now, that ship has sailed. BUT if I did just want sex with him I’d want him to do all the filth and sexual kinks that I’m into. So do you see my point? I would’ve had a relationship with him and been satisfied, happy and loyal to him. I wouldn’t feel like I was lacking or missing out on anything because I value love and intimacy more than a kink. I wouldn’t be looking to get my fix from anyone else. But all he wanted and I believe all he’s offering now is a fuck. If I want just a fuck I want it with someone who will tick all my kink boxes. "

So he’s shown himself to be not a great boyfriend.

He’s also not a great fuck.

All he is, is available. I don’t think you should feel bad about giving him the elbow

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By *utlongjohnMan over a year ago

So he’s shown himself to be not a great boyfriend.

He’s also not a great fuck.

All he is, is available. I don’t think you should feel bad about giving him the elbow "

I agree, he doesnt even sound like a compatable fuck as he has very little interest in meeting your sexual needs or kinks. He sounds like he purely wants to have generic vanilla sex to dump his load with zero interest in fulfilling your desires.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

So he’s shown himself to be not a great boyfriend.

He’s also not a great fuck.

All he is, is available. I don’t think you should feel bad about giving him the elbow "

He was a good fuck, I enjoyed myself every time. He had his own shit going on, was 10 months out of a 16 year relationship and don’t really think he knew what he wanted. But regardless I’m out of that equation.

It’s quite a nice feeling to say no to these guys that have previously blown me out. Not in a nasty way. There’s 4 guys in the last 3 years that I’ve had feelings for and was hurt deeply when they sacked me off. Now prior to my counselling I think I would’ve entertained them, met them and slept with them again. But I’d be lying if I didn’t say it felt good to say no to them.

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By *utlongjohnMan over a year ago

So he’s shown himself to be not a great boyfriend.

He’s also not a great fuck.

All he is, is available. I don’t think you should feel bad about giving him the elbow

Good on you for have the power to say no. There will be plenty of men who would love to treat you like the only women on earth but also rim and piss on you when you the mood takes you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So he’s shown himself to be not a great boyfriend.

He’s also not a great fuck.

All he is, is available. I don’t think you should feel bad about giving him the elbow

That's really good news. Been hoping for this (for you) for years.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Did you ease in gently to the concept of rimming etc or just bam!!

Men are not open to sudden change and stuff.

Maybe him hanging out with you got him thinking in the friend zone and that made him find his happy place. Or maybe he just wasn’t that into you… I dunno.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I’d want a boyfriend who WOULD do that/be into that. Nothing better than shit hot, exciting, never knowing what is on the cards kind of sex!

Lost count of how many times i have I read posts by you and found myself nodding in agreement.

You have an unfailing ability to hit the nail squarely on the head.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

For all the people that have said a relationship should be about trust and being able to experience and share your sexual links and desires together. Do you lot not believe that some men view women as dirty or only worth a fuck if she’s too filthy/sexually adventurous?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some men certainly do believe that, I wouldn’t be interested in someone with that view anyway. It’s ridiculous.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

Some men, yes. But they're not the type I'd want any kind of involvement with. I'm married to a man with whom I am open to be as filthy as I like. I wouldn't have wanted to marry someone who didn't want to know my filthy side. The good news is he is just as filthy so it's all good.

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By * and R cple4Couple over a year ago

swansea

"For all the people that have said a relationship should be about trust and being able to experience and share your sexual links and desires together. Do you lot not believe that some men view women as dirty or only worth a fuck if she’s too filthy/sexually adventurous? "
Yeah I agree with you that some men are like that but why would you even give these men your time or energy. You deserve to be with someone that accepts you warts and all ..Someone that will enjoy being filthy in the bedroom sometimes but also loving and romantic other times.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Yeah so if all I’ve witnessed and experienced is men seeking extra marital stuff their partner won’t do, or guys saying women on here are good for a fuck but not to date. Or guys from the real world having all this filthy sex with me but never making me a girlfriend (I know there could be a number of reasons for that).

I used to be hopeful or naive that it didn’t matter where a guy met me so long as we met. We could be as filthy as we wanted but it wouldn’t taint the way a guy saw me. Unfortunately experience has led me to think it’s too hard.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Do not some women view men as just something to have dirty fun with or only worth getting their sexual joy from also?

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

"Yeah so if all I’ve witnessed and experienced is men seeking extra marital stuff their partner won’t do, or guys saying women on here are good for a fuck but not to date. Or guys from the real world having all this filthy sex with me but never making me a girlfriend (I know there could be a number of reasons for that).

I would say you've not met the right guys for what you want. They do exist (men who are happy to have kinky sex with the woman they marry/have a long term relationship with). One of the first things we did together in our sex life was go and buy fluffy handcuffs! We got together in February and by June of the same year, we were off to Ann Summers. Tame? Yes, but we were at sixth form!

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By *utlongjohnMan over a year ago

So long as the woman was loyal and loving once we had met i would be open to anything. I have my kinks and so will they and if we could share them in a loving relationship without any question that would be perfect.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why not be with him for both reasons?

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By *.D.I.D.A.SMan over a year ago

London/Essex... ish... Romford to be exact

I have seen many Caucasian or Asian couples. Yet I have also seen them seek out exclusively black bulls. What does this tell us? A lot of people make a distinction between what they want from a relationship standpoint and their extracurricular sex life. You're good enough to fuck but I wouldn't take you home to show my mum.

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By *emorefridaCouple over a year ago

La la land

[Removed by poster at 05/11/21 11:56:06]

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I didn’t make that judgement or decide who is good for a fuck or who is good for a relationship for nothing. I’d have both with someone if I could but my experiences have taught me that you can only have certain things from certain guys.

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By *emorefridaCouple over a year ago

La la land

I'm in a relationship with someone who sees me as a partner, mother, friend, career driven as well as being a kinky bitch. We all wear different hats, depending on the situation we are in. If a man can't be kinky as fuck with me and then not think of me as being one of the most precious things in his life, then he's not for me. I'm not a one dimensional character, that to me is boring as

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By *rHotNottsMan over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I can’t relate. I don’t do one -offs but I would be fully sexually liberated with a life partner / girlfriend, I wouldn’t need to hold back any kink/fantasy specifically for someone less close, that’s a bit repressed. But its not uncommon here, I’ve been told similar

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By *utlongjohnMan over a year ago

"I didn’t make that judgement or decide who is good for a fuck or who is good for a relationship for nothing. I’d have both with someone if I could but my experiences have taught me that you can only have certain things from certain guys.

Keep looking because i guarantee there is someone out there that will tick every single box of yours.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can’t relate. I don’t do one -offs but I would be fully sexually liberated with a life partner / girlfriend, I wouldn’t need to hold back any kink/fantasy specifically for someone less close, that’s a bit repressed. But its not uncommon here, I’ve been told similar "

Pretty much the same sentiments as me.

If I fell a close connection with someone which I need for any sort of intimacy (ONS or not), that person is already good enough a person for me to be considered long term partner should anything happen.

I would find it pretty insulting to say to a woman, you're good enough to fuck, but not good enough to marry. Think of it that way OP, and wonder if you'd be insulted by that reply instead.

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By *uffolksubWoman over a year ago

Brandon

"It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

It’s not as simple as having a shower though is it. For some men once they’ve seen their partner do a certain thing they can’t just shower away that image or how they view them. "

I really think this is the legacy of a repressed society. For example, look at the way the sex industry (and swinging) is perceived by most. There’s still a stigma around all things sexual…..even us sexually mature Fabbers often don’t share our lifestyle choice with our friends and family. It all comes down to that deeper level of acceptance and understanding about what you really want out of life. Many people do the marriage and kids things because it’s what is expected of them by society and their families. They don’t give any real thought to what it is that really makes them tick. So there are a lot of repressed married people, who need an outlet for their desires. Then of course, they are putting members of the opposite sex into categories and can’t see beyond that. The thought of bringing their sexual desires into their day to day life is frightening and possibly embarrassing to many - they worry about what ‘society’ would say and they may even feel ashamed. So they compartmentalise…..which is why women (and men) on Fab are seen as non relationship material. People want to ‘tow the line’ in their vanilla lives, but also have an outlet for their darker desires.

I believe that the people who have got it right are those who have moved past this concept of the socially acceptable/expected lifestyle and have dug a little deeper. I’m fascinated by this thread and have also noticed that the majority (if not all) couples that have commented can’t relate to the op, because they’ve found a way to look beyond and embrace who they really are…..and they’ve found someone with the same level of emotional and sexual maturity to share their lives with. As the op said in a later post, maybe that’s really want we would all love to have….it’s just not easy to find.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

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By *uriousscouserWoman over a year ago

Wirral

"I don’t want my cake and eat it… I want to share my cake with someone who is just a weird as me and eat it together, in bed, off each other.

I love that!

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By *m3232Man over a year ago

maidenhead

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

Seems to me you are embarrassed or ashamed of your dirty side.

For me I would love to have someone that can on the odd occasion switch it up a gear when you want the more kinky side of sex.

That would make them perfect IMO.

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By *isfits behaving badlyCouple over a year ago

Coventry

That makes sense. Especially when you have certain kinks. Unusual kinks vastly reduce your selection pool massively when you also want to match them with other dating characteristics. And then if you factor that certain kink roles tend to attract people with other characteristics that you may not find desirable. So ideally we want to be with someone we can share everything with, including our kinks but I get this can be difficult for you.

All I can say is first your not wrong in what you've said to the guy. You know what you want, he knows what he wants and if that's not compatible it's one of them. Also it's a shame if you have given up on having the total package he's probably out there somewhere. However I can understand your approach if based on long experience this is the pragmatic conclusion. Although I think you may find it difficult to find a guy happy with you doing your thing alone and not sharing into that. Most of all I wish you all the very best finding what you seek.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

I dunno but what are you doing Saturday?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

It’s not as simple as having a shower though is it. For some men once they’ve seen their partner do a certain thing they can’t just shower away that image or how they view them.

Thank you for getting it and explaining it much better.

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By *uffolksubWoman over a year ago

Brandon

"It sounds to me like these men you speak of just want their cake and eat it.

Using the children as an excuse as to why they dont want rimming from their partner for example seems a bit contradictory, do they not get their cock sucked then based on the same idea?

Obviously after sex or that type of activity you just get showered and cleaned up to carry on with the rest of your day.

If i thought about every handshake that has probably held a cock or public cutlery when you dont know whos mouth it has been in, i would never set foot out of the house again haha

It’s not as simple as having a shower though is it. For some men once they’ve seen their partner do a certain thing they can’t just shower away that image or how they view them.

Thank you for getting it and explaining it much better. "

You’re welcome, although you explained it fine

For me, there are two types on men on Fab in this context (I’m sure this applies to women too, but I don’t have any direct experience of this!) - those who have embraced their sexual desires and needs and made a lifestyle choice accordingly (a lot of these are in couples on here, the remainder demonstrate via their profiles and their forum posts that they have a deeper understanding of themselves beyond the normal expectations)….and those who are in unhappy marriages that are looking for an outlet. The second type are the ones who wouldn’t piss in their wives mouths, but would happily piss in the mouths of women on here!

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By *otMe66Man over a year ago

Terra Firma

I guess you will always be in the position of making a choice of f%ck or partner until you can accept that what you like in the bedroom does not make you less of a person out of it.

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By *uffolksubWoman over a year ago

Brandon

[Removed by poster at 05/11/21 12:29:33]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand. "

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I guess you will always be in the position of making a choice of f%ck or partner until you can accept that what you like in the bedroom does not make you less of a person out of it. "

You’re not getting it. I don’t believe I’m less of a person for liking what I like. I could happily be with a guy who would send me videos of him having a shit, I wouldn’t judge him or like him any less. Same as if I had a guy who enjoyed being bent over and fucked in the arse with a strap on, I wouldn’t view him as less than anything. I would love to be able to do all my sexual kinks and desires with someone and maybe one day I will find someone like that who wants a relationship, but, a lot of men can’t get passed the idea that a woman can be filth but also loving, loyal, kind, vanilla can take home to parents type as well.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?"

I think people are all different and some compartmentalise their life and the people in it. I knew a woman once who categorised her friends and met them according to what she needed. I was a conversation friend apparently. Interestingly she also had a lover her husband didn't know about, husband supplied money and children, lover supplied the kind of sex she really wanted.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?"

This is what I mean about the attitudes, views and experiences I’ve had. It’s okay for the man to do these things and be a stand up guy but if a woman does it oh no. Should be what’s good for the goose is good for the gander but it’s not. It’s not fair and there are some more evolved guys who can see that women can be all things. But sadly I’ve experienced men who share the above view.

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By *ex HolesMan over a year ago

Up North

Sorry, I wouldn’t piss in anyone’s mouth full stop

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By *utlongjohnMan over a year ago

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate?

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

This makes no sense at all to me, it doesnt make your partner a slut just because she sticks her tongue in your ass, lets you piss on her or anything else sexually that is non vanilla, it simply means you have the best connection where you are comfortable enough to engage in each others deepest desires.

Your partner should be the one person who is everything roled into one, wifey, mother, bestfriend and the best sexually compatible person for you.

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By *otMe66Man over a year ago

Terra Firma

I guess you will always be in the position of making a choice of f%ck or partner until you can accept that what you like in the bedroom does not make you less of a person out of it.

I do get it I think

Either way, I don't know you but I have read so many of your posts that I know you wear your heart on your sleeve. I feel you are good person and I do hope you find Mr Right very soon, he is going to love you and you are going to rock his world for sure. Keep on being honest to the core

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By *izzy.miss.lizzyCouple over a year ago

Pembrokeshire

I guess some people like to put their associations with other people into separate parts of their brain/heart/feelings...

my late Hubby did that to justify his secret affair!

He said I was "too nice" to go rogue on, being the mother of his babies and all,

while she "seemed less important to him so it was ok to treat her like the tramp that she was"

His Father had done same to his Mother too,

and his GrandFather to his Grandmother before that.

People live how they choose to live, I guess it's not for anyone to judge, unless you are the one it hurts.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don’t understand why you can’t have both from the same person… a dirty one night fuck do everything you want situation and a loving relationship…I think they’re extremely difficult to find, but the emotional bond and trust you get is immense.

Other scenario… if the guys good in every other way… you don’t know that he might not enjoy whatever you want to do… just might be afraid to bring it up… try!!

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"Just the way it is. Lots of women fuck around with the bad boys and settle down with the decent guys.

Same as some guys would have sex with some women but wouldn't date them. "

Interesting perspective. There's also the possibility that the female in the scenario is the 'bad' half and is submitting to a darker side that she wouldn't want to live on a daily basis or in a loving committed relationship. Especially if it lasted for years or eternity ......

The male is not always pivotal to proceedings.

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By *uitednbooted2Man over a year ago

Berkshire

I think 38 years of age OP and you still don’t know what you want is your biggest issue

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I think 38 years of age OP and you still don’t know what you want is your biggest issue

Where do I say I don’t know what I want!?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I think 38 years of age OP and you still don’t know what you want is your biggest issue

How old are we in general when we are all sorted and know precisely what we want ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think 38 years of age OP and you still don’t know what you want is your biggest issue

How old are we in general when we are all sorted and know precisely what we want ?"

Older than I am apparently

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is it not insulting to a partner that there are activities that could be indulged in with other, but not them?

I can understand the compartmentalisation to some degree, but if I discovered a desire to be more adventurous with other than a partner then as a partner I’d be insulted. Granted the thrust of this topic is before the relationship is established. Just i’m not sure a relationship would survive with such compartmentalisation once it was realised.

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By *aiseiMan over a year ago

Birmingham

"This is so one of those posts where if a man had posted it ……..

Why would you not want a boyfriend who did those things though? What are the reasons?

x "

Emotion, possibly? It could be easier to get absolutely nasty

with someone you didn’t have an emotional connection with.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/11/21 09:57:36]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"For what it’s worth, I understand where the op is coming from.

Does he respect her? Should she be flattered You tell me.

Analyze This

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If that’s your requirements OP, then that’s all there is to it, we all have our perfect partner types. Personally if the sex wasn’t mind blowing then it wouldn’t work for me, either as a one off, or a full relationship.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can certainly understand your reasoning based on your past experience. That conclusion would be perfectly natural.

Just a thought, and this is not meant to be judgemental or generalised - but I suspect that it could be more to do with the type you’re going for rather than men generally and anything to do with your own expectations.

Maybe adjust some of the criteria. Unattached less conventionally ‘hot’ might have a more open mind. Evolution teaches us to adapt to our strengths. Those who are ‘very hot’ by definition have to do leas in other areas to satisfy their needs as they are already highly desirable on looks alone. But those fade, and the underlying characteristics don’t change.

Remember what Einstein didn’t say?

All the best OP. Hope you find what you’re looking for soon. (mr)

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?"

This is what I meant in my earlier comments. A lot of men think like that. Especially on here.

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By *orksRockerMan over a year ago

Bradford

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

This is what I meant in my earlier comments. A lot of men think like that. Especially on here. "

And OP too from the original start post...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

This is what I meant in my earlier comments. A lot of men think like that. Especially on here.

And OP too from the original start post...

Yeah that’s exactly what I said wasn’t it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?"

Not at all, did I ever say that?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

Hold up I haven’t once said a women can’t do those things not once

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

Not at all, did I ever say that? "

Do you mind answering the question "Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife?"

Because I still really don't understand.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

Not at all, did I ever say that?

Do you mind answering the question "Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife?"

Because I still really don't understand."

I didn’t say it wasn’t, I just said I wouldn’t

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

Not at all, did I ever say that?

Do you mind answering the question "Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife?"

Because I still really don't understand.

I didn’t say it wasn’t, I just said I wouldn’t "

And then the question is why? Why wouldn't you, if you don't mind us asking?

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

Not at all, did I ever say that?

Do you mind answering the question "Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife?"

Because I still really don't understand.

I didn’t say it wasn’t, I just said I wouldn’t

And then the question is why? Why wouldn't you, if you don't mind us asking? "

Before this goes to far let me just say when I mean a slut I’m talking about women who are fully into being that with consent, I don’t just treat every women like a slut.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

Not at all, did I ever say that?

Do you mind answering the question "Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife?"

Because I still really don't understand.

I didn’t say it wasn’t, I just said I wouldn’t

And then the question is why? Why wouldn't you, if you don't mind us asking?

Before this goes to far let me just say when I mean a slut I’m talking about women who are fully into being that with consent, I don’t just treat every women like a slut."

I haven't questioned what is meant by a slut. Merely asked why you are okay with such women as casual partners but would not choose such a woman for a wife.

Yours, a wife who is slutty for her husband.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

Not at all, did I ever say that?

Do you mind answering the question "Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife?"

Because I still really don't understand.

I didn’t say it wasn’t, I just said I wouldn’t

And then the question is why? Why wouldn't you, if you don't mind us asking?

Before this goes to far let me just say when I mean a slut I’m talking about women who are fully into being that with consent, I don’t just treat every women like a slut."

I take it I probably have worded my sentence in the wrong way, which reading back sounds like there is something wrong with being that way. I meant there’s thing o would try that I wouldn’t do with a particular partner just preference. I apologise if it offended anyone or come across on the wrong way

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *ntrigued32Couple over a year ago

Nottingham

I haven't read the thread but for what it's worth here's my input.

I think 'for me' the issue is that you wouldn't do Xyz with someone you love but would with a stranger. Like they hold less value/importance to you so it's ok to do that with them. Why not change your thought process. For instance. If I wouldn't do it with the person I love then I wouldn't do it with a stranger?

Jo.Xx

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By *oldyoudown41Man over a year ago

caledonian

"…someone told you they’d like/consider you for a relationship, to love and build a life with but not for a one off fuck?

I didn’t tell him this bit but he’s good looking but not obscenely good looking, good penis but not huuuuuge, open minded but not sexually vile.

In my head this makes sense. Can anyone relate? "

I wouldn’t take it as an insult, but I’d like to explore the one off theory and you could build on that relationship

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

Not at all, did I ever say that?

Do you mind answering the question "Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife?"

Because I still really don't understand.

I didn’t say it wasn’t, I just said I wouldn’t

And then the question is why? Why wouldn't you, if you don't mind us asking?

Before this goes to far let me just say when I mean a slut I’m talking about women who are fully into being that with consent, I don’t just treat every women like a slut.

No, there's nothing wrong with being slutty. Just still trying to understand why you'd be okay with a casual partner but not a wife, but there we are.

I personally think it's joyous that I have a husband of 12yrs marriage and almost 18yr relationship with whom I can be whatever I want to be (sexually and otherwise).

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I understand what you mean, the things I want to do I wouldn’t want to do with a wife type of girl. If I want to treat you like a slut I wouldn’t want my wife to be treated like one

Why?? Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife? I really don't understand.

I don’t either? Does it make us lesser people, not worthy, if we’re dirty/filthy/slutty?

Not at all, did I ever say that?

Do you mind answering the question "Why is it okay to treat casual partners "like a slut" but not a wife?"

Because I still really don't understand.

I didn’t say it wasn’t, I just said I wouldn’t

And then the question is why? Why wouldn't you, if you don't mind us asking?

Before this goes to far let me just say when I mean a slut I’m talking about women who are fully into being that with consent, I don’t just treat every women like a slut.

No, there's nothing wrong with being slutty. Just still trying to understand why you'd be okay with a casual partner but not a wife, but there we are.

I personally think it's joyous that I have a husband of 12yrs marriage and almost 18yr relationship with whom I can be whatever I want to be (sexually and otherwise)."

I’m not saying that there is anything wrong with it, and it’s wonderful you both can express together

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By *inky_couple2020Couple over a year ago

North West

Well, we answered that question, didn't we?!

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