T here.
I was a Midwife for 25 years. Three times I heard women say they weren't going to breastfeed because they didn't want their nipples poked with a needle.
In response to telling a father he had a son, he asked me how I knew. I lifted the baby up and he said
"oh, I didn't think they grew until later". |
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By *inger_Snap OP Woman
over a year ago
Hampshire/Dorset |
"T here.
I was a Midwife for 25 years. Three times I heard women say they weren't going to breastfeed because they didn't want their nipples poked with a needle.
In response to telling a father he had a son, he asked me how I knew. I lifted the baby up and he said
"oh, I didn't think they grew until later"."
Wow... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we  ??!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!"
Made us laugh 
Mr |
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"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!"
Waaa, this has reminded me of a nonsense rhyme my gran taught me. "one fine day in the middle of the night"
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!
Waaa, this has reminded me of a nonsense rhyme my gran taught me. "one fine day in the middle of the night"
"
Two dead men got up to fight?
My dad used to tell us that when we were kids.
Mr |
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"T here.
I was a Midwife for 25 years. Three times I heard women say they weren't going to breastfeed because they didn't want their nipples poked with a needle.
In response to telling a father he had a son, he asked me how I knew. I lifted the baby up and he said
"oh, I didn't think they grew until later"."
Outstanding |
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By *rAitchMan
over a year ago
Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe |
"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!"
Sounds like a Picasso portrait! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Sorry to go off topic OP but my favourite story started with me wearing green tights and a red dress - I couldn't even concentrate on the content after that. It wasn't even Christmas! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!"
I don't know but I'm rock hard now |
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"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!
Waaa, this has reminded me of a nonsense rhyme my gran taught me. "one fine day in the middle of the night"
Two dead men got up to fight?
My dad used to tell us that when we were kids.
Mr"
That's the one I loved it as a kid |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Not biology but I was in bed with a lass in a maids outfit when she told me to get the vibrator out of the drawer. It was a cheap copy of a rabbit and when I turned it on it made a loud wirrrring sound and had disco lights in it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!
Waaa, this has reminded me of a nonsense rhyme my gran taught me. "one fine day in the middle of the night"
Two dead men got up to fight?
My dad used to tell us that when we were kids.
Mr
That's the one I loved it as a kid "
Thanks for that - it is a nice memory.
Mr |
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By *inger_Snap OP Woman
over a year ago
Hampshire/Dorset |
"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!"
Octopus contortionist mutant? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!
Octopus contortionist mutant? "
That can be my new Halloween username  |
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By *inger_Snap OP Woman
over a year ago
Hampshire/Dorset |
"Not biology but I was in bed with a lass in a maids outfit when she told me to get the vibrator out of the drawer. It was a cheap copy of a rabbit and when I turned it on it made a loud wirrrring sound and had disco lights in it."
Disco rabbit.... Nice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not biology but I was in bed with a lass in a maids outfit when she told me to get the vibrator out of the drawer. It was a cheap copy of a rabbit and when I turned it on it made a loud wirrrring sound and had disco lights in it.
Disco rabbit.... Nice "
Still managed to 'stay alive' |
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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago
Whitley Bay |
"Sorry to go off topic OP but my favourite story started with me wearing green tights and a red dress - I couldn't even concentrate on the content after that. It wasn't even Christmas! "
oh my this is hilarious! |
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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago
Whitley Bay |
The other day I had..
"would you shit on my chest then ride me in cowgirl. Then after, would you shit on me again"
Hmmm probably not, I usually only go once a day.. Sometimes twice but not so close together. Sorry!
|
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"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!"
*Applause* |
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"I love the unsolicited stories that guys send that make zero sense!
'I fuck you from behind as we kiss passionately, staring straight into each others eyes. One hand on your throat, one on your clit, one in your ass. As I pull out and cum on your tits, you squirt all over my face.'
Dafuq kinda mutants are we ??!!
Waaa, this has reminded me of a nonsense rhyme my gran taught me. "one fine day in the middle of the night"
Two dead men got up to fight?
My dad used to tell us that when we were kids.
Mr
That's the one I loved it as a kid
Thanks for that - it is a nice memory.
Mr"
My Grandad taught me this one:
It was Christmas Day in the trenches,
And the snow was raining fast.
A barefooted man with clogs on,
Stood sitting on the grass.
He went round a straight crooked corner,
And saw a dead donkey die.
So he took out his penknife and shot it,
And it gave him one back in the eye!
I'll never tire of reciting it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The can I get you pregnant messages on here that I get 
Why? You on the pill?"
No it’s biologically inpossble or in less it’s a act off god and a true miracle happens |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"The can I get you pregnant messages on here that I get
Why? You on the pill?
No it’s biologically inpossble or in less it’s a act off god and a true miracle happens "
Immaculate conception |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The can I get you pregnant messages on here that I get
Why? You on the pill?
No it’s biologically inpossble or in less it’s a act off god and a true miracle happens
Immaculate conception"
Yes sis I would need to be xxxx |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"The can I get you pregnant messages on here that I get
Why? You on the pill?
No it’s biologically inpossble or in less it’s a act off god and a true miracle happens
Immaculate conception
Yes sis I would need to be xxxx"
Xxx |
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