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Over and Over again
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Does anyone else feel like they keep doing the same mistakes over and over and over and over again? Recidivism at the purest form 
Or is this just me ? A friend of mine is just as bad as me so we confort each other but we need to know we ain’t the only ones
It could be about anything and how do you deal with it? |
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Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results
Hold hands up to this*
I do repeat certain things knowing that I will at some point have to 'pay the piper' but at the time I enjoy it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Repeating patterns, no matter how much they hurt, is because we are comfortable with them. We know the outcome and do it anyway.
Only way out is to shift the comfort zone and intentionally create new patterns |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results
Hold hands up to this*
I do repeat certain things knowing that I will at some point have to 'pay the piper' but at the time I enjoy it."
Literally so relatable  are you conscious about the fact that u do the same mistakes over and over?
As I know some people aren’t or they say they aren’t |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Try not to
But my dynamic makes it a lot easier
As stuck in the middle I don’t really date guys in such a sense or never meet a guy I would think to date in such a manner
So make it’s easier knowing it’s just sex it is what it is sort off thing
My dateing and relationship premis is normally woman
That’s not to say that a Fb or fwb for a guy wouldn’t be on the table but not full on relationship
Witch means I don’t tend to run in to the fuckboys as much or maybe I do
But because we just after the same thing don’t tend to notice it as much |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I mean it doesn’t necessarily mean these mistakes boil down to men. it can be totally general to other things like friendships or life choices in general
I’m speaking very broadly |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Repeated mistakes often have a pattern before then you can take steps to break.
Find the pattern and take steps to break it "
Isn’t that the hardest part? Realising and breaking them?
I think I need to call my therapist (on speed dial already ) - yet again |
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By *JBezantMan
over a year ago
Manchester |
"Repeating patterns, no matter how much they hurt, is because we are comfortable with them. We know the outcome and do it anyway.
Only way out is to shift the comfort zone and intentionally create new patterns"
Your a wise man, maybe the power lies in the beard perhaps not. What came first the wise man or the beard?
Don’t be too hard on yourself either way, we’re all imperfect. |
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"Repeated mistakes often have a pattern before then you can take steps to break.
Find the pattern and take steps to break it
Isn’t that the hardest part? Realising and breaking them?
I think I need to call my therapist (on speed dial already ) - yet again "
The idea is that most people get stuck on “don’t do this”
But “this” is already too late because the pattern has already started
You don’t stop cheating on your diet by letting yourself get the ice cream out the freezer then saying no
You stop by realising there’s a pattern way before that. Maybe you skipped lunch which leads to an in controllable hunger later? Or maybe you forgot to meal prep so you didn’t have something easy to grab and eat? Or maybe you bought the ice cream when you know you shouldn’t |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Repeating patterns, no matter how much they hurt, is because we are comfortable with them. We know the outcome and do it anyway.
Only way out is to shift the comfort zone and intentionally create new patterns
Your a wise man, maybe the power lies in the beard perhaps not. What came first the wise man or the beard?
Don’t be too hard on yourself either way, we’re all imperfect."
The power is in the beard  being hard on ourselves will only drive us further away from making the change because it lowers self worth |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Repeated mistakes often have a pattern before then you can take steps to break.
Find the pattern and take steps to break it
Isn’t that the hardest part? Realising and breaking them?
I think I need to call my therapist (on speed dial already ) - yet again
The idea is that most people get stuck on “don’t do this”
But “this” is already too late because the pattern has already started
You don’t stop cheating on your diet by letting yourself get the ice cream out the freezer then saying no
You stop by realising there’s a pattern way before that. Maybe you skipped lunch which leads to an in controllable hunger later? Or maybe you forgot to meal prep so you didn’t have something easy to grab and eat? Or maybe you bought the ice cream when you know you shouldn’t "
I’m mind blown! So true tho, you do come with some good stuff every now and again thick , I’ll give u that |
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yes I have done
wish I knew how to avoid it but life isn't so easy sometimes
being a creature of (bad) habits isn't all fine and dandy and I have to suck up the consequences sometimes  such is life! |
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Being too trusting of people and letting myself be walked over endlessly.
Believing people when they say they're interested, only to keep meeting others and never commit to any plans with me.
Don’t blow smoke up my arse if you’ve no intention of acting on what you’re telling me.
Actions speak a hell of a lot louder than words and I am beyond tired of listening to the bullshit I’m fed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I went to therapy to help break my negative cycles.
I know now what triggers me but I still put myself into situations where I end up being disappointed in people and it triggers a negative emotion spiral in me.
It feeds my low self esteem and I end up in a confirmation bias spiral.
It's why swinging has been tough on my mental health.
We can get out of these behaviours. It just takes time and strong self care |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Being too trusting of people and letting myself be walked over endlessly.
Believing people when they say they're interested, only to keep meeting others and never commit to any plans with me.
Don’t blow smoke up my arse if you’ve no intention of acting on what you’re telling me.
Actions speak a hell of a lot louder than words and I am beyond tired of listening to the bullshit I’m fed "
I never chatted to you but you seem a really lovely person.
I hope it gets better for you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Being too trusting of people and letting myself be walked over endlessly.
Believing people when they say they're interested, only to keep meeting others and never commit to any plans with me.
Don’t blow smoke up my arse if you’ve no intention of acting on what you’re telling me.
Actions speak a hell of a lot louder than words and I am beyond tired of listening to the bullshit I’m fed "
 |
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I try to find patterns so I can avoid getting stuck in the cycle of making the same mistakes over and over.
There are millions of mistakes I can be making, no need to limit myself to the same ones! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I seem to keep attracting emotionally unstable women that then break up with me with the excuse that I'm too good for them and they don't want the heartbreak down the line (4 times in 3 months).
Why pretend you're fine to later admit your not? And why cut yourself if from decent people that might not actually be bad for you?
But no doubt I'll find another 1 or 2 more in the next month. Same mistakes over and over |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I try to find patterns so I can avoid getting stuck in the cycle of making the same mistakes over and over.
There are millions of mistakes I can be making, no need to limit myself to the same ones!"
It’d be nice to make different mistakes for a change |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I seem to keep attracting emotionally unstable women that then break up with me with the excuse that I'm too good for them and they don't want the heartbreak down the line (4 times in 3 months).
Why pretend you're fine to later admit your not? And why cut yourself if from decent people that might not actually be bad for you?
But no doubt I'll find another 1 or 2 more in the next month. Same mistakes over and over "
Awessss pablo hugs… |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I seem to keep attracting emotionally unstable women that then break up with me with the excuse that I'm too good for them and they don't want the heartbreak down the line (4 times in 3 months).
Why pretend you're fine to later admit your not? And why cut yourself if from decent people that might not actually be bad for you?
But no doubt I'll find another 1 or 2 more in the next month. Same mistakes over and over
Awessss pablo hugs… "
Thanks Kylie . Been feeling a bit drained with it all tbh |
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"Being too trusting of people and letting myself be walked over endlessly.
Believing people when they say they're interested, only to keep meeting others and never commit to any plans with me.
Don’t blow smoke up my arse if you’ve no intention of acting on what you’re telling me.
Actions speak a hell of a lot louder than words and I am beyond tired of listening to the bullshit I’m fed I never chatted to you but you seem a really lovely person.
I hope it gets better for you"
Thank you. It won’t though |
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"I seem to keep attracting emotionally unstable women that then break up with me with the excuse that I'm too good for them and they don't want the heartbreak down the line (4 times in 3 months).
Why pretend you're fine to later admit your not? And why cut yourself if from decent people that might not actually be bad for you?
But no doubt I'll find another 1 or 2 more in the next month. Same mistakes over and over "
It's not that you attract them, it's that they're drawn to you. If you're the one that's strong/stable/together. They probably think that you can fix them, but what they really need is therapy.
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