FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Ethnicities

Ethnicities

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

I understand you have choices and preferences to who you want to have sexual relationships with is understandable but point blank not talking to a curtain skin colour I think is racist any body else experience this

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By *iss LovelyWoman over a year ago

Here and There

Whilst there are people on here who are open to meeting any person of any shape/size/age/ethnicity, most people have a physical preference. If you’re not their physical preference and they don’t want to meet you, then a lot won’t waste time talking to you. That’s really common. If I get a message from someone Im not interested in then I don’t chat either.

Some people are racist, but just because someone doesn’t want to chat to you on here doesn’t mean that’s automatically the reason. It can be a bit cut throat here I’m afraid.

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By *offiaCoolWoman over a year ago

Kidsgrove

I know you keep posting the same question judging by the green arrow.

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By *asmeenTV/TS over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"I know you keep posting the same question judging by the green arrow. "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

I think you need to move on, instead of labeling people. They can choose not to meet people for whatever reason.

If someone is looking for a 9 inch cock and your smaller. Are you going to spend time shaming or trying to change their mind.

Why not focus your attention on people your compatible with.

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By *offiaCoolWoman over a year ago

Kidsgrove

"I know you keep posting the same question judging by the green arrow.

I was cross that the first social I have had in years deceived me by using photos 20 years old by his own admission. Posting multiple threads asking why he did it won't change anything.

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By *asmeenTV/TS over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

"I know you keep posting the same question judging by the green arrow.

I was cross that the first social I have had in years deceived me by using photos 20 years old by his own admission. Posting multiple threads asking why he did it won't change anything."

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By *nabelle21Woman over a year ago

B38

I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What a load of cod shit, my opinion.

Preferences are preferences and whatever they are is indifferent to race, creed, size or sod all, it’s a “PREFERENCE” ffs

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By *nabelle21Woman over a year ago

B38

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference "

I don't think that's quite the same thing.

Sexual preference is innate in us...we can't help that. It's not a choice.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

I don't think that's quite the same thing.

Sexual preference is innate in us...we can't help that. It's not a choice."

For some it is, esp when they don't seek single men but do seek tvs. Maybe bad example but everyone is entitled to preferences

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By *nabelle21Woman over a year ago

B38

This is just my opinion..I don't seek to change anyone's mind. Just maybe if they are open minded enough, give them pause for thought.

Anyway...I'm out!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x"

Well said

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You could say why do people reject a whole age group, a whole sexuality, a whole body type, a whole gender and on and on. Race is not a special case yet this card is constantly raised, give it a rest and let people get on with their preferences. As long as people are not bigoted on their profiles about it or in real life, it is no ones business

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

This is one that always pains me

Very dark skin tones rarely catch my eye

However, I find arabic / Mediterranean / mixed race skin tones way more attractive than I do white skin

I don't know why that is and tbh I've given up worrying, because I do know that it doesn't come from a racist position, latent or otherwise

I find older (my age) women attractive, yet with men, my attraction is generally towards those younger than me

Again, no clue why

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By *nabelle21Woman over a year ago

B38

"You could say why do people reject a whole age group, a whole sexuality, a whole body type, a whole gender and on and on. Race is not a special case yet this card is constantly raised, give it a rest and let people get on with their preferences. As long as people are not bigoted on their profiles about it or in real life, it is no ones business

Give it a rest! Why because it makes you uncomfortable or just annoys you. Everyone has a right to express their opinion...whether we agree with it or not

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Give it a rest! Why because it makes you uncomfortable or just annoys you. Everyone has a right to express their opinion...whether we agree with it or not "

Calm down deary

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Many ladies have found the colour of my skin/appearance intriguing. They like trying to guess at my lineage. Other than bastard, obviously..

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By *nabelle21Woman over a year ago

B38

Give it a rest! Why because it makes you uncomfortable or just annoys you. Everyone has a right to express their opinion...whether we agree with it or not

Calm down deary"

Don't patronise me!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Give it a rest! Why because it makes you uncomfortable or just annoys you. Everyone has a right to express their opinion...whether we agree with it or not

Calm down deary

Don't patronise me!"

Have a nice night

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By *nabelle21Woman over a year ago

B38

Give it a rest! Why because it makes you uncomfortable or just annoys you. Everyone has a right to express their opinion...whether we agree with it or not

Calm down deary

Don't patronise me!

Have a nice night "

I will do...I'm off out later. Have yourself a good one too

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By *andare63Man over a year ago

oldham

I like what I like and my preference and choice has nothing to do with a racist mindset

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

If you just won’t talk to a particular race is racism

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you just won’t talk to a particular race is racism "

I don’t talk to many races of different complexions so does that make me racist??

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By *mma29Couple over a year ago

wirral

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x"

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

Now this is different totally and is a derogative look/take on preference and definitely crossing lines of racism

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By *aked2sumCouple over a year ago

local

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

I could point out a few profiles that say “black men only “. So does the race card work when you turn it over ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

I could point out a few profiles that say “black men only “. So does the race card work when you turn it over ?"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

I could point out a few profiles that say “black men only “. So does the race card work when you turn it over ?"

No because never in society have establishments and other things around the world said “blacks only”

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

I could point out a few profiles that say “black men only “. So does the race card work when you turn it over ?

No because never in society have establishments and other things around the world said “blacks only”

And for the record, check previous posts, I disagree with the op before ANY brigade chat shit

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I think people on here don’t know how racist they can be people in the past have spoke to me fine nice banter few messages exchanged sum naughty pics were sent even our face pics were exchanged but as soon as they asked me my race and Iv said I’m asian they said “we don’t talk to Asians bye ” that was there actual reply I was like okay fucking is one thing I understand your preference and desires but you don’t talk to Asians I’m sure is racism

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference "

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

I could point out a few profiles that say “black men only “. So does the race card work when you turn it over ?"

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

No I don't experience it. I do think it's racism though some think it's preference.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think people on here don’t know how racist they can be people in the past have spoke to me fine nice banter few messages exchanged sum naughty pics were sent even our face pics were exchanged but as soon as they asked me my race and Iv said I’m asian they said “we don’t talk to Asians bye ” that was there actual reply I was like okay fucking is one thing I understand your preference and desires but you don’t talk to Asians I’m sure is racism"

Well that certainly sounds like racism. What I suggest is you stating your race on your profile to avoid those types of people

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By *nabelle21Woman over a year ago

B38

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

I could point out a few profiles that say “black men only “. So does the race card work when you turn it over ?"

Out of curiosity....was it white couples saying this?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist. "

I agree

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"What a load of cod shit, my opinion.

Preferences are preferences and whatever they are is indifferent to race, creed, size or sod all, it’s a “PREFERENCE” ffs

Except when they say whites only or no asians ....... that's exclusion on race.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist. "

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Well that certainly sounds like racism. What I suggest is you stating your race on your profile to avoid those types of people

"
:

Lol I have but I didn’t want to label myself ow I’m asian but I have to it’s like being an Asian is a curse on here

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By *hunkymonkey81Man over a year ago

Sheffield

Skin colour is so unimportant its the person in that skin that matters

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

I could point out a few profiles that say “black men only “. So does the race card work when you turn it over ?"

This is fetishizing the colour of someone's skin which is different to discriminating on the same basis. Some people are happy to be fetisized (there are any number of profiles offering BBC), others find it demeaning. Whatever it is, it isn't the same as harbouring a negative attitude to someone based on their ethnicity.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Skin colour is so unimportant its the person in that skin that matters"

At the end off the day we all have the same colour blood but it’s not a curse in being of any complications of skin colour yes I under stand you have a choice to who you invite into bed but not taking to a particular race is racism I think and not every finger is the same every one is different

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well that certainly sounds like racism. What I suggest is you stating your race on your profile to avoid those types of people

Lol I have but I didn’t want to label myself ow I’m asian but I have to it’s like being an Asian is a curse on here"

I think 'Asian guys' have a rep for being discourteous, pushy, disrespectful

That's unfortunate for the 95% of asian guys that aren't any of those things

Sprinkle on a liberal grating of Islamophobia and it's certainly an uphill struggle for a lot of guys of Pakistani / Indian / Bangladeshi heritage

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic. "

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

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By *imi_RougeWoman over a year ago

Portsmouth

"I can imagine that it is frustrating to feel like your not even given a chance. There are all kinds of people that this happens to.

In answer to your question... to carpet blank a whole race I think is racist.

I await the it's a personal preference comments.

I don't think people realise it is...I think it's on a subconscious level. Hearing negative stereotypes over the years and soaking them up.

Try and move past it....it'll just eat you up. Good luck in your search x

Spot on

The same argument has been going on for years and if anything I think the 'preferences' have got worse.

I saw a profile the other day that said 'whites only' like 90s South Africa.

As for the preferences brigade, whatever.

I could point out a few profiles that say “black men only “. So does the race card work when you turn it over ?"

Exactly

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By *urved HunnyWoman over a year ago

Essex

I have only ever desired men with dark skin and the features of a black man, also I like their upbringing, its way more complex than that but essentially it's my preference. Always has been. Same as liking other races or types, eg Latino etc etc. Plenty will like what you are, so stick to that. It's not racism at all, it's sexual preferences and we all have them

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And so what if they are racist? They weren't rude, they just said they didn't want to talk to you.

See it as a positive. They clearly didn't bother reading your profile. Do you want to meet someone like that?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I know you keep posting the same question judging by the green arrow. "

Go inspector morse lol

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are"

Yes we're ALL racist of course

Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?"

Not sure there's any call for that kind of unpleasantness. But maybe I missed something?

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?

Not sure there's any call for that kind of unpleasantness. But maybe I missed something?"

Green arrow

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By *inky-MinxWoman over a year ago

Grantham

"Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?

Not sure there's any call for that kind of unpleasantness. But maybe I missed something?"

Equally, inferring everyone is racist is inviting negative responses in my book

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?

Not sure there's any call for that kind of unpleasantness. But maybe I missed something?

Green arrow

Nah, I totally get where he's coming from. It's quite obvious that on here men are often dismissed simply for the fact they are Asian. I'd feel pretty down in the dumps too if I was him. I'd want people to look at me for who I am. I've lost count of the amount of profiles I've seen who won't even give someone who is black or asian the time of the day. I doubt it is pleasant.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?

Not sure there's any call for that kind of unpleasantness. But maybe I missed something?

Green arrow

And if he were posing this question as an attractive woman the responses would be VERY different.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I’ll like to know why and prove them wrong

And so what if they are racist? They weren't rude, they just said they didn't want to talk to you.

See it as a positive. They clearly didn't bother reading your profile. Do you want to meet someone like that? "

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

Yes we're ALL racist of course

Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?"

No it’s not about fancying any one it’s about how people don’t want to talk to a Pakistani heritage

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?

Not sure there's any call for that kind of unpleasantness. But maybe I missed something?

Equally, inferring everyone is racist is inviting negative responses in my book

I think I should sit back and be quiet and tolerate what I feel and not speak out because every time I speak out I always get the same people saying I’m playing the race card yes I have mentioned this mater a few times to understand what is the issue why are Asian men not liked and forget sleeping with them you don’t want to talk to them

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?

Not sure there's any call for that kind of unpleasantness. But maybe I missed something?

Green arrow

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?

Not sure there's any call for that kind of unpleasantness. But maybe I missed something?

Green arrow

And if he were posing this question as an attractive woman the responses would be VERY different."

SOOOO TRUE

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Give it a rest! Why because it makes you uncomfortable or just annoys you. Everyone has a right to express their opinion...whether we agree with it or not "

Well sometimes my opinions hurt people that are guilty when you speak out the pick on you they want you to stay quiet and take the abuse quietly

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By *ose and her beastCouple over a year ago

Watford

A preference isn't racism I don't fuck other dudes that doesn't make me homophobic

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's rare to read a similar thread posted by an Asian (or black) female

Is 'racism' on here only directed towards Asian males?

Is it women that are towards Asian men?

Are men only racist towards other men, women are 'fair game' regardless of colour / race?

Please note: these are questions, not statements

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By *andyfloss2000Woman over a year ago

ashford

People will deny its racism not much u can do really! Shame but how it is sometimes x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

Racism isn't just skin colour.

The Australians call us British.

The British call the Americans.

Eastern Europians, Irish, Welsh, English etc etc all come into play with regards to racism.

Attitude in a person is far more important than a persons race.

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By *isces WomanWoman over a year ago

West London

I find some cultural backgrounds not in line with my cultural backgrounds and therefore incompatible.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Skin colour is so unimportant its the person in that skin that matters

Lol “we have the same colour blood” but sex isn’t about blood, is it? Not really trying to shag blood, are we!? This is a hook up site, there’s no point talking to someone who you aren’t attracted to/won’t hook up with. I’m certainly not here to talk, anyway!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference. "

So, by your logic - someone like me, is racist? I’m a black woman who likes black men. I don’t think white men are unworthy or whatever. I just like to have sex with black men. I don’t think others should police who other people choose to have sex with. Race is a protected characteristic, as is disability, sexuality, gender etc… so in that same vein, are we all expected to be “open minded” and sleep with people who we don’t find attractive?

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By *oeBeansMan over a year ago

Derby

I think it's fine to have a preference in terms of the skin tone you find most appealing and going for that as you find that sexually attractive.

What I doubt however, is finding an entire race unattractive. In my mind, that's just not possible.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The OP is clear that he understands people have preferences.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

People have so many different opinions so no matter what anyone posts you will have those that agree and those that don't.

Its a shame that you feel constantly put down just because of your race but I'd try not get too down about it I think most men in general have a hard time on here . If its not due to race could be age, body type, 'attractiveness'. Just kinda have to roll with it and hopefully nobody is abusive about it

And racism is still a big thing no matter how far we have come. Can only hope the next generation will do better, cause sadly too late for some people.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Very racist to the core.

It all stems from history.whats changed.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Here we go again. These threads keep coming up.

TLDR - Everyone, including you and ne, has physical traits to which they are attracted to. These physical traits include height, weight, eyes, boobs, bums, thighs, legs etc. This is a long list and skin colour is one of it.

Having any of these preferences doesn't make anyone a racist. No one has to have sex with people who they are not visually attracted to for moral reasons. Swinging is beyond all moral judgements. If someone doesn't like you, move on to the next person. It's as simple as that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

I don't expect anyone to sleep with someone they do not find attractive. I've not said that anywhere on this thread. What I have said, is that completely dismissing someone because of their skin colour or the fact they are Asian is racist.

If you like men who are black, that is fine. But if you wouldn't give a white person the time of the day and you'd completely box millions of white people off and deem them as unattractive then I think that's racist and incredibly dense.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Skin colour is so unimportant its the person in that skin that matters

That blood colour argument is so funny. As though the OP doesn't have any preferences and will have sex with anyone who asks for it because blood colour is same

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Maybe no one fancies you, ever thought of that?

Not sure there's any call for that kind of unpleasantness. But maybe I missed something?

Green arrow

Well done for standing up and firm!!

Have seen many posts like that on here.

Even had the very same. " oh sorry not our type"

Wow same everytime..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

Same could be said about people who are looking for only tall men/short men. How is skin colour different? If someone says all X colour people are bad, that's racist. If someone says I am physically attracted only to X coloured people or I am not physically attracted to Y colour people, it's not racist.

There are thousands of people on fab. It makes logical sense to just spend time on people who they find physically attracted towards and ignore the rest. People don't have time to meet everyone.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Give it a rest! Why because it makes you uncomfortable or just annoys you. Everyone has a right to express their opinion...whether we agree with it or not

Well sometimes my opinions hurt people that are guilty when you speak out the pick on you they want you to stay quiet and take the abuse quietly"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There is a fine line between stating preferences to make your admin life easier, versus something that reads as offensive.

"BBC preferred"

"Black men only"

"No whites"

And then blocking someone after they say they are Asian when you have seen pictures... That sounds really fucking suspicious.

The trouble is, if people have these views, we Cannae change them. Best to be upfront and if that causes premeptive blocks, that's on them. That says everything about them, and who wants to meet people like that ?

But it sucks, right? But fab isnt a numbers game. It's about finding really good fits that tick lots of boxes. And focussing on them.

Good luck OP

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There is a fine line between stating preferences to make your admin life easier, versus something that reads as offensive.

"BBC preferred"

"Black men only"

"No whites"

And then blocking someone after they say they are Asian when you have seen pictures... That sounds really fucking suspicious.

But it sucks, right? But fab isnt a numbers game. It's about finding really good fits that tick lots of boxes. And focussing on them.

Good luck OP

Is saying "No whites" or "No blacks" or "No Asians" offensive? Where do we draw the line?

I am an Asian guy and I know of a couple of Asian female friends who told me they wouldn't date Asian guys because they find Asian culture misogynistic and wouldn't want to live with men who have those cultural traits.

In the end, who someone dates, marries or has sex with doesn't affect anyone else and it is none of our business. I don't think anyone should be judged based on that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

Why should anyone have to give someone the time of day, time is precious and people shouldn’t feel entitled to other peoples time or body. This is specifically for this site. I can see a white man and find him attractive, doesn’t mean I will sleep with him.

Race is similar to gender, in that it’s a characteristic of a person. So someone is sexist for not being attracted to certain genders?! Hilarious!

I see plenty of profiles where they say they want women of a certain age, certain hair colour, certain build etc…. If I don’t fit THEIR preference, I move on and find someone who I am in their preference. Not rocket science and not worth moaning about the same thing over and over again.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

There are thousands of people on fab. It makes logical sense to just spend time on people who they find physically attracted towards and ignore the rest. People don't have time to meet everyone."

Your last para sums it right up! There’s also a clear difference between being rude and stating your preference. I get a lot of men messaging me and questioning why I only like black men or asking if they can shag me because they’ve never shagged a black woman before. Bordering on weird but I just block on move on.

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By *host63Man over a year ago

Bedfont Feltham

This site I about fantasy. People here are seeking g to fulfil theirs and will be exra picky because of that. Maybe more so than if they were looking for a relationship.

So if yiu don't fit into their fantasy it's not gonna happen and their is sod all yku can do about.

And I am.saying that as someone who's success rate is zero. Just have to live with reality

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you just won’t talk to a particular race is racism "

Oh I forgot, sorry does my body my choice not fit in with your agenda.

Il drop my preferences and my rights to please you.

What a joke!

And because you are struggling to get anywhere I must be a racist as well!

Literally take a step back and have a word with yourself, before you post utter nonsense.

This is my first ever forum post btw, as I felt so compelled to let you know how disgusting this is!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you just won’t talk to a particular race is racism

Oh I forgot, sorry does my body my choice not fit in with your agenda.

Il drop my preferences and my rights to please you.

What a joke!

And because you are struggling to get anywhere I must be a racist as well!

Literally take a step back and have a word with yourself, before you post utter nonsense.

This is my first ever forum post btw, as I felt so compelled to let you know how disgusting this is!"

Maybe for your next one you could read what you're responding to before replying

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The OP is clear that he understands people have preferences. "

He said that he understands preferences and then went on to call them racist. He clearly didn't.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It’s a preference. I don’t like men or tv/ts. Does that make me homophobic?! maybe it’s ageist for people to look for particular age types… get a fucking grip. It’s different having someone not attracted to you because of your colour to someone not liking you because of it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The OP is clear that he understands people have preferences.

He said that he understands preferences and then went on to call them racist. He clearly didn't."

No you choose to interpret his comments to suit your agenda.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The OP is clear that he understands people have preferences.

He said that he understands preferences and then went on to call them racist. He clearly didn't.

No you choose to interpret his comments to suit your agenda."

This is a swinger site. People talk to people who they want to have sex with. In the original post, he mentioned that not talking to people of certain race here is racist. How is that understanding preferences? Your profile states that your age preference is a maximum of 59 years. Should I morally judge you based on that and assume that you hate old people in real life too? I am surprised that I am on a swinger site and I have to explain the importance of holding personal preferences without being morally judged.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The OP is clear that he understands people have preferences.

He said that he understands preferences and then went on to call them racist. He clearly didn't.

No you choose to interpret his comments to suit your agenda.

Couldn't give a shit how you judge me.

Having seen what's written on many profiles I can understand why some feel alienated.

'We're seeking sexy Asian men' is a preference.

'No whites' is not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The OP is clear that he understands people have preferences.

He said that he understands preferences and then went on to call them racist. He clearly didn't.

No you choose to interpret his comments to suit your agenda.

Couldn't give a shit how you judge me.

Having seen what's written on many profiles I can understand why some feel alienated.

'We're seeking sexy Asian men' is a preference.

'No whites' is not.

And no one gives a shit about people calling them racists for holding preferences on who they want to have sex with. It's the ignorance of the ones holding the views.

How about putting it in a different way and saying "We are seeking Black, South Asian, East Asian and Latin people"? Is that less racist than saying "No whites"?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

No I’m not saying to fuck me what I’m saying is will you blank me and not talk to me reason being I’m asian

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"The OP is clear that he understands people have preferences. "

Everyone is thinking about sex and preference what I’m saying is not talking to me because I’m asian is it racism

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

Forget even thinking it is fine but stating you don’t like to talk to asian that’s hardcore racism

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By *ucka39Man over a year ago

Newcastle

It's chemistry nothing else just like a person may be happy to chat with them be friends with them but doesn't want to sleep with them it's a choice and a choice that should be respected just because someone decides to message you are not owed pleasure be human.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

There are thousands of people on fab. It makes logical sense to just spend time on people who they find physically attracted towards and ignore the rest. People don't have time to meet everyone.

OKAY FOR EXAMPLE

if you started chatting to someone you exchange pictures and messages everything’s going smooth and then all of a sudden you recived a message saying QUOTE “ we don’t talk to black women” what’s the first thing you will think

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Look I understand preferences who you want to go bed with orange purple or blue colour people It don’t concern me but saying we don’t talk to certain colour people is racism and also you can't just punish all the race because of 1 idiot

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By *ophieslutTV/TS over a year ago

Central

"If you just won’t talk to a particular race is racism "

Most men here don't get messages replied to, they get deleted and blocked. Whatever your skin colour, you will typically find others not wanting to communicate with you. Some of them will also do it because of your skin colour but it's likely that it will be 99.9% of the same response regardless. If they are upfront stating that they don't fancy men like you, it prevents you wasting any efforts.

It's wiser to let it go and to focus your efforts wisely here

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By *xydadbodMan over a year ago

Milton keynes

I don't think people are being racist on purpose.. its a preference and people do have a right to choose. Just move on and keep trying I say. The right person will come along

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The OP is clear that he understands people have preferences.

He said that he understands preferences and then went on to call them racist. He clearly didn't.

No you choose to interpret his comments to suit your agenda.

Couldn't give a shit how you judge me.

Having seen what's written on many profiles I can understand why some feel alienated.

'We're seeking sexy Asian men' is a preference.

'No whites' is not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

Pm me fella i shall explain all..

Cheers

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By *iss LovelyWoman over a year ago

Here and There

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

I don't think that's quite the same thing.

Sexual preference is innate in us...we can't help that. It's not a choice."

I think attraction is innate. Sexual preference is just another part of that. Based on personal experience I’ve never been able to control who I find attractive. My mind has sometimes changed as I’ve got to know someone before, but I still don’t have any control over it.

Now that I’m 40 I know myself pretty well and I’m familiar with what types of people I’m typically attracted to, so that’s what I look for. I think everyone is the same. It’s not to say that I’ll never find someone outside of my norm attractive, but it’s unlikely.

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By *iss LovelyWoman over a year ago

Here and There

"The OP is clear that he understands people have preferences.

He said that he understands preferences and then went on to call them racist. He clearly didn't.

No you choose to interpret his comments to suit your agenda.

Couldn't give a shit how you judge me.

Having seen what's written on many profiles I can understand why some feel alienated.

'We're seeking sexy Asian men' is a preference.

'No whites' is not.

It’s still a preference, it’s just poorly communicated

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By *he_Last_TitanMan over a year ago

Bristol

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

I think you need to move on, instead of labeling people. They can choose not to meet people for whatever reason.

If someone is looking for a 9 inch cock and your smaller. Are you going to spend time shaming or trying to change their mind.

Why not focus your attention on people your compatible with. "

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By *iss LovelyWoman over a year ago

Here and There

"Look I understand preferences who you want to go bed with orange purple or blue colour people It don’t concern me but saying we don’t talk to certain colour people is racism and also you can't just punish all the race because of 1 idiot "

What makes you think that they are trying to punish you or that they had a bad experience? Maybe they’re just not attracted to Asian men and don’t waste time talking to people they’re not attracted to. They might be racist or they might not, it’s not always racism.

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By *iss LovelyWoman over a year ago

Here and There

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

No I’m not saying to fuck me what I’m saying is will you blank me and not talk to me reason being I’m asian "

You only have experience of being an Asian man on here, but ask some of the white or black guys and they’ll tell you the same thing. They contact a person they fancy, that person doesn’t find them attractive and so doesn’t want to chat. It isn’t just happening to you or to Asian men.

Some people are racist, obviously, but some just don’t waste time chatting to people they don’t want to have sex with.

In my whole life I’ve never found an Asian man of any kind attractive, but I’m sometimes attracted to Asian women. In the past 10 years I haven’t found white men attractive, but have been attracted to white women. I’m usually attracted to black men and often find black women attractive too. Does anyone of that make me racist? I don’t think so.

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By *orth_hantscplCouple over a year ago

camberley

I think you’re overthinking this, we get plenty of messages from guys that aren’t what we’re looking for. We don’t play often and prefer to meet white guys when we do. So if you messaged us we wouldn’t be interested, and I guess you’re right, that is because you’re Asian, but just because we have a preference for white guys. The thing is we don’t chat to other guys that we have no interest in ever meeting either. We do normally politely decline if it’s a well written message though.

You can’t in one breath say people can sleep with any colour they like, and then say if people don’t talk to you they’re racist. Nobody has to chat to anybody on here.

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Its personal choice, why would someone go with a red head if they dont find red heads attractive?

When looking for a partner or meet looking for a 'blank canvas' isn't a option, i like what i like and wouldnt deviate from that to a physical appearance i dont find attractive.

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By *AYENCouple over a year ago

Lincolnshire

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

Yes, it is racist.

Unfortunately, in the world today there are racist people - including plenty from your own ethnicity.

People are allowed to be racist, as long as it isn't race hate that transcends into violence or abuse, then it's legal to be racist.

So you will have to accept that sadly, some people will choose that path.

You could be as white as snow, and as English as a cup of (Indian) tea, but still not do well on here.

I would suggest OP, you stop obsessing about it, it will make the problem seem much worse than it actually is.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

Forget even thinking it is fine but stating you don’t like to talk to asian that’s hardcore racism "

This is a swinger's site. People talk with people who they want to have sex with. No one is obligated to talk to you here. Do you talk to men on here if you are heterosexual?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And so what if they are racist? They weren't rude, they just said they didn't want to talk to you.

See it as a positive. They clearly didn't bother reading your profile. Do you want to meet someone like that?

I’ll like to know why and prove them wrong

Fair point and that might be ok in nornal situations. But it's a Swingers site where people are looking for sex, not chat.

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By *ucka39Man over a year ago

Newcastle

Bottom line is everyone is here for something and would rather be chatting with someone who they are compatible with rather than wasting time on someone who isn't and that is a choice and their preferences so find those who you are with rather than judgement and use the filters

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Bottom line is everyone is here for something and would rather be chatting with someone who they are compatible with rather than wasting time on someone who isn't and that is a choice and their preferences so find those who you are with rather than judgement and use the filters"

This !!!

Before I changed the filters, I got messages from men. (Usually offering massages) I’m not interested in them at all, have no desire to speak to them as they are not what I’m looking for. So they get blocked. I don’t consider myself homophobic. Also, when I see women and couples bios stating they want black/mixed/ethnics only, I block them. Not because I think they are racist but because I know I’m not what they are looking for and because fab doesn’t have a filter for them to choose the types they want to see their profile, they have to state it. I’ve mentioned it in the fab feedback section about creating a tick box for ethnic preferences but doubt it will happen because there are clearly many people here that think it would be racist to do so.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This !!!

And I mean a tick box so that only people in their preferences can see their bios. I think that would be so much easier. Like I can’t see bios that have stated they are not looking for single men

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This !!!

And I mean a tick box so that only people in their preferences can see their bios. I think that would be so much easier. Like I can’t see bios that have stated they are not looking for single men"

Exactly my views too. I block people who are not looking for Asians and move on. No judgements. I have also posted on here asking for a tick box like you mentioned. Having the tick box and the ability to search profiles based on the ethnicities they are looking only makes life lot easier for me. Sad that this useful feature is not present because some people perceive it as racism.

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By *aughty Nas xxxMan over a year ago

Birmingham

Just be yourself and be patient is my advice as asian guy on here

Time is the only thing of true value ...why give yours to someone who dont want it .... be respectful and move on I say

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This !!!

And I mean a tick box so that only people in their preferences can see their bios. I think that would be so much easier. Like I can’t see bios that have stated they are not looking for single men"
could ppl then block messages? You can't contact this user because you are black.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

There are thousands of people on fab. It makes logical sense to just spend time on people who they find physically attracted towards and ignore the rest. People don't have time to meet everyone.

OKAY FOR EXAMPLE

Well, it is pretty clear that I am a black woman and I’ve stated my preference on my profile. If we are a point of exchanging pictures and numbers, it’s already been established that we are each other’s type. So if a black man told me he didn’t talk to black women, I would say “cool” and move on.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Personality counts for everything,I don't care if your purple lol.and I'm not shy about saying I'd love to play with an ebony lady,an Indian lady,an eastern lady .a redhead ,life is an adventure.i just get the racism thing at all.

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By *ucka39Man over a year ago

Newcastle

[Removed by poster at 03/10/21 11:41:54]

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By *ucka39Man over a year ago

Newcastle

To use the race card because someone has a preference is totally wrong same as someone isn't interested in anyone gay or bi or bi curious doesn't make them homophobic I'm far from being judgemental as I have friends from all walks of life and this has been not only their choice but mine and I continue to make many more this is where my energy goes sexually or non

Preference isn't a crime think you need to deal better with rejection and understand it's not just about your needs but as a whole.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

There are thousands of people on fab. It makes logical sense to just spend time on people who they find physically attracted towards and ignore the rest. People don't have time to meet everyone.

OKAY FOR EXAMPLE

But what if it was a white guy or Asian

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

There are thousands of people on fab. It makes logical sense to just spend time on people who they find physically attracted towards and ignore the rest. People don't have time to meet everyone.

OKAY FOR EXAMPLE

But what if it was a white guy or Asian"

It doesn't matter who does it. It is their preference. Any human has the right to decide who they want to have sex with. On a swinging site, most people talk only with people who they have sexual attraction to. There is nothing morally wrong about it. You are the one who needs to handle rejection better instead of playing race card.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It's rare to read a similar thread posted by an Asian (or black) female

Is 'racism' on here only directed towards Asian males?

Is it women that are towards Asian men?

Are men only racist towards other men, women are 'fair game' regardless of colour / race?

Please note: these are questions, not statements "

So, is exclusion based on race / skin colour predominantly a man only thing on here?

Are women 'forgiven' their race or skin colour cos they have boobies and a foof?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It appears to me some people are hurt or offended by this experiences here.

And that a lot of the thread is to say they are wrong to react this way. Rather than understand why and consider changing our behaviour to not cause negative feelings.

Should we be able to state preferences in any way if that makes our lives easier. Regardless of how that reads to others ?

Should fab have filters then. To make out lives even easier?

Or could we reword our profiles or take a different approach?

It's probably easier for me to filter awya from public eye as I get less messages.

But I'm not getting the empathy on this thread as I do other threads.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If someone doesn't want to meet based on colour then that's up to them, just block, delete, forget and move on. There are thousands of other people to choose from. Everyone has preferences and they aren't racist.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 03/10/21 12:27:54]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It appears to me some people are hurt or offended by this experiences here.

And that a lot of the thread is to say they are wrong to react this way. Rather than understand why and consider changing our behaviour to not cause negative feelings.

Should we be able to state preferences in any way if that makes our lives easier. Regardless of how that reads to others ?

Should fab have filters then. To make out lives even easier?

Or could we reword our profiles or take a different approach?

It's probably easier for me to filter awya from public eye as I get less messages.

But I'm not getting the empathy on this thread as I do other threads.

Yeah I think they should add more filters

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By *ucka39Man over a year ago

Newcastle

This !!!

And I mean a tick box so that only people in their preferences can see their bios. I think that would be so much easier. Like I can’t see bios that have stated they are not looking for single mencould ppl then block messages? You can't contact this user because you are black."

Wouldn't it be easier to respect someone's wishes and not be offended by this it's only racist moment slur has been used or other commitments

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This !!!

And I mean a tick box so that only people in their preferences can see their bios. I think that would be so much easier. Like I can’t see bios that have stated they are not looking for single mencould ppl then block messages? You can't contact this user because you are black.

Wouldn't it be easier to respect someone's wishes and not be offended by this it's only racist moment slur has been used or other commitments"

No. This idea saves time for me. I should be able to search only for people who are happy meeting Asians. Right now, I search for profiles with certain criteria and see 100s of them. I open and read every one of the profiles. It is a waste of time for me reading the profiles of people who are not looking to meet Asians.

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By *ucka39Man over a year ago

Newcastle

This !!!

And I mean a tick box so that only people in their preferences can see their bios. I think that would be so much easier. Like I can’t see bios that have stated they are not looking for single mencould ppl then block messages? You can't contact this user because you are black.

Wouldn't it be easier to respect someone's wishes and not be offended by this it's only racist moment slur has been used or other commitments

But you've the meet section to write so anyone compatible is able to respond also makes light work

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This !!!

And I mean a tick box so that only people in their preferences can see their bios. I think that would be so much easier. Like I can’t see bios that have stated they are not looking for single mencould ppl then block messages? You can't contact this user because you are black.

Wouldn't it be easier to respect someone's wishes and not be offended by this it's only racist moment slur has been used or other commitments

But you've the meet section to write so anyone compatible is able to respond also makes light work"

I don't think people are that active on meets section. From my experience, one in 50 profiles use it. Even there, we don't have the feature to search by ethnicities. I don't have the data obviously. But my guess is many people still use the people-search functionality.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It's rare to read a similar thread posted by an Asian (or black) female

Is 'racism' on here only directed towards Asian males?

Is it women that are towards Asian men?

Are men only racist towards other men, women are 'fair game' regardless of colour / race?

Please note: these are questions, not statements

So, is exclusion based on race / skin colour predominantly a man only thing on here?

Are women 'forgiven' their race or skin colour cos they have boobies and a foof?"

Women are 'forgiven' their race, skin colour, age, size, marital status, etc etc because pussy is scarce and gotta take it if it's there.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"It's rare to read a similar thread posted by an Asian (or black) female

Is 'racism' on here only directed towards Asian males?

Is it women that are towards Asian men?

Are men only racist towards other men, women are 'fair game' regardless of colour / race?

Please note: these are questions, not statements

So, is exclusion based on race / skin colour predominantly a man only thing on here?

Are women 'forgiven' their race or skin colour cos they have boobies and a foof?

Women are 'forgiven' their race, skin colour, age, size, marital status, etc etc because pussy is scarce and gotta take it if it's there. "

So true

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By *ucka39Man over a year ago

Newcastle

This !!!

And I mean a tick box so that only people in their preferences can see their bios. I think that would be so much easier. Like I can’t see bios that have stated they are not looking for single mencould ppl then block messages? You can't contact this user because you are black.

Wouldn't it be easier to respect someone's wishes and not be offended by this it's only racist moment slur has been used or other commitments

But you've the meet section to write so anyone compatible is able to respond also makes light work

Then their is the option of social events and clubs their is no excuse when everything is available

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Shouldn't make ANY difference.

Go down 3mm under the skin and we're all the same colour!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Shouldn't make ANY difference.

Go down 3mm under the skin and we're all the same colour!

Thank you very much

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Shouldn't make ANY difference.

Go down 3mm under the skin and we're all the same colour!

But we aren’t having sex with people 3mm under the skin. There needs to be an initial attraction, right?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"You don't seek single men, that's your preference

Others may not seek certain ethnicies, that's their preference

It's not a preference to dismiss groups of people because of their ethnicity. It's small minded and pretty racist.

You do not include women or TV on your profile, you cannot dismiss groups of people because of their gender or gender identity. That is small minded and misogynist and transphobic.

Oh stop.

It's a pretty strange comparison to make. I am straight, so that's why I don't include those you mentioned on my profile.

It's racist to rule out a whole race and be so close minded about it. It's like you're saying they are all the same, like they aren't worthy and are all unattractive.

I have a preference for dark haired men with beards, but I don't rule out every other man because I'm not narrow-minded.

You'll never change your mind and I won't change mine. I've had this argument too many times on here with people like you who see it as a preference.

There are thousands of people on fab. It makes logical sense to just spend time on people who they find physically attracted towards and ignore the rest. People don't have time to meet everyone.

OKAY FOR EXAMPLE

But what if it was a white guy or Asian"

Well it won’t be? Because I’m not attracted to white/Asian guys and have made this clear in my profile what my attraction is. So if people message me that clearly haven’t read my profile, I won’t respond. I am not obliged to respond to every message. Time is limited, I rather focus my time on those who I will want to have sex - I hope that’s ok with you and doesn’t make me too racist in your eyes. If it will make you happier though, I can try and have sex with both a white guy and an Asian guy this week x

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

King's Crustacean

"A preference isn't racism I don't fuck other dudes that doesn't make me homophobic "

You were born heterosexual. No one is born racist. That is not an adequate analogy. Infantile really.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A preference isn't racism I don't fuck other dudes that doesn't make me homophobic

You were born heterosexual. No one is born racist. That is not an adequate analogy. Infantile really. "

We're also not born to be a aircraft pilot but some people have the desire to do so so do it, many dont but will happily fly in one. Choices, preferences.

To have a sexual attraction is exactly that, its a preference i dont find black skin sexually attractive and thats ok... im not racist my absolute best friends black i have no issues with black people at all i just wouldnt chase sexually however I find caramel skin very very sexually attractive. Its purely a sexual preference which as a human being we're fully entitled too

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

Just don’t state preferences on your profile that could be seen as controversial. It’s really quite easy. I know what I like and don’t like. The whole world doesn’t need to know.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"A preference isn't racism I don't fuck other dudes that doesn't make me homophobic

You were born heterosexual. No one is born racist. That is not an adequate analogy. Infantile really.

We're also not born to be a aircraft pilot but some people have the desire to do so so do it, many dont but will happily fly in one. Choices, preferences.

I have a preference for dark skin/dark hair but I've been happily with my pasty white blonde wife for nearly thirty years.

I find the concept that you can find somebody unattractive based solely on their skin color strange. I'm not saying you're wrong for it being so, I just find it odd.

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By *irthandgirthMan over a year ago

Camberley occasionally doncaster

OP. Without repeating a lot of people on here.. if you are having problems engaging with people, have you tried a different approach? I have no idea if you have tried local organised socials or club nights, or if you are just messaging on here. Maybe your will have better luck face to face?

Hope you have better luck in the future..

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By *areToShareCouple over a year ago

Bingham

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

Because we and everybody else can choose who we play with. We don't owe you a reason or an explanation as to our decision or choices.

Are you sure it's racism that's the reason people won't meet you? After all, you're bisexual, so it could be that people are homophobic? Or, it could just be that your profile and what you are looking for, doesn't match with what others are looking for?

You'll never know OP, and quite frankly, it's none of your business why people don't want to meet you. Throwing the race card in there based on the fact you've brown skin is going to do no more than simply antagonise more people and lessen your chances.

Maybe focus on messaging people of your ethnicity and if the results are the same, then you can categorically rule racism out of your debate and acknowledge that maybe it's just something about your profile or photos that doesn't appeal to people.

We meet people of different ethnic backgrounds based on them as people and what their interests are in relation to ours.

Stay positive and stop blaming others or you'll drown in your own self pity and negativity.

Good luck in your quest on Fab

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Race is similar to gender, in that it’s a characteristic of a person. So someone is sexist for not being attracted to certain genders?! Hilarious!

Why would someone be sexist because they are not attracted to a certain gender? I'm pretty sure that's more to do with your sexuality rather than having an issue with the gender. It doesn't make sense comparing the two.

But if a woman is gay and blocks every woman and will not give another female the time of the day then yeah I would say that's a red flag and she's probably sexist.

It's really not a preference, but whatever. If you want to shove people into boxes and label that as a preference then go ahead. But I feel sorry for you and anyone else who rejects every person they come across that has colour of skin they do not like.

I have no issue with people who are more attracted to certain skin colours, but it becomes a problem when you dismiss everyone else as unworthy of your consideration just because they aren't black or whatever.

I don't see the point of you trying to make me look at this a different way. It's something I will will never accept as a preference. But have fun with your preferences.

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By *eliWoman over a year ago

"...however I find caramel skin very very sexually attractive. "

Is this "caramel" skin like Ariane Grande?

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By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

No I’m not saying to fuck me what I’m saying is will you blank me and not talk to me reason being I’m asian "

No…. It could be a myriad of reasons, big or small, but it’s the one YOU have decided to focus on because in effect it leaves you blameless and points the finger at everything other than the person staring you back in the mirror….

People may have looked at your profile, or may have used that green arrow for research, or looked at posts, or a million other things…

You are not owed just for being here… you have your own preferences ( I would be more scared about a person if someone didn’t to be honest! )

You are not going to like everyone, everyone is not going to like you…

So rather the chase those you are never going to change the mind of…

1) concentrate on those who do want what you can offer..

2) ask yourself well how can I make myself better!!! What can I do that will make people think wow I have to meet that person!!!!

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By *oddess NailaWoman over a year ago

London & Edinburgh

If you’re not someone’s preference get over it. I can guarantee they won’t be wasting time thinking about you!

I have my preferences but that doesn’t make me racist or homophonic. I just know there are certain physical characteristics that turn me on and for the most part it’s out of my control what those are.

Calling out everyone as a racist that isn’t turn on by your physicality is fairly narrow minded.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"...however I find caramel skin very very sexually attractive.

Is this "caramel" skin like Ariane Grande? "

Totally, also Shay Mitchell

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If you’re not someone’s preference get over it. I can guarantee they won’t be wasting time thinking about you!

Calling out everyone as a racist that isn’t turn on by your physicality is fairly narrow minded. "

I don't get why some get so upset over preferences. Why would anyone want to sleep with a other person who isn't attracted to them?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't find certain races more physically attractive than others but find myself much more comfortable and compatible with women of my own race which makes me prefer them. I guess I'm a racist...

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By *eliWoman over a year ago

"...however I find caramel skin very very sexually attractive.

Is this "caramel" skin like Ariane Grande?

Totally, also Shay Mitchell

I'm not touching the rest of the thread, just curious.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"...however I find caramel skin very very sexually attractive.

Is this "caramel" skin like Ariane Grande?

Totally, also Shay Mitchell

I'm not touching the rest of the thread, just curious."

I think I know exactly what you're thinking.

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By *eliWoman over a year ago

"...however I find caramel skin very very sexually attractive.

Is this "caramel" skin like Ariane Grande?

Totally, also Shay Mitchell

I'm not touching the rest of the thread, just curious.

I think I know exactly what you're thinking.

Oh yes! You definitely would and get it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"...however I find caramel skin very very sexually attractive.

Is this "caramel" skin like Ariane Grande?

Totally, also Shay Mitchell

I'm not touching the rest of the thread, just curious.

I think I know exactly what you're thinking.

Oh yes! You definitely would and get it.

(curious eyeball emoji- that fab doesnt have)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just don’t state preferences on your profile that could be seen as controversial. It’s really quite easy. I know what I like and don’t like. The whole world doesn’t need to know.

It is not that easy.

Why should people not mention their preferences and then handle all messages from people who fall outside their preferences? The world doesn't need to make a big deal about it.

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By *ora the explorerWoman over a year ago

Paradise, Herts

"Just don’t state preferences on your profile that could be seen as controversial. It’s really quite easy. I know what I like and don’t like. The whole world doesn’t need to know.

It is not that easy.

Why should people not mention their preferences and then handle all messages from people who fall outside their preferences? The world doesn't need to make a big deal about it."

They can. I just find it easier not to. And being a woman you soon realise that the majority message anyway and ignore/don’t read the profile so it makes no difference anyway.

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By *nabelle21Woman over a year ago

B38

[Removed by poster at 03/10/21 21:20:16]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just don’t state preferences on your profile that could be seen as controversial. It’s really quite easy. I know what I like and don’t like. The whole world doesn’t need to know.

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By *asters_kittenCouple over a year ago

Luton

I think the main reason is......

It's there/our preference...

I adore dark skin but will chat with others as long as they know my preference.

A lot of the time I would not entertain chatting on here to someone who I am not attracted to as it could be taken as leading someone on.

We are all entitled to our preferences, myself and master speak with all types of people ascwe are quite chatty. We also make it clear it will not lead to play but happy to chat. Some people will only chat to lead if it is going to lead somewhere.

Kitten xxx

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By *luttTV/TS over a year ago

Duns

I’m happy to say I’m an equal opportunities slut - I won’t turn down cocks of any ethnicity

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By *oncupiscent_dreamMan over a year ago

City

Don't see the problem, loads won't be with me cause I'm not black, as long as they write it on their profile so I can not bother them.

To be honest I'm not sure why I would want to even chat to them. So I'd be happy if they didn't even talk to me. Saves everyone some time.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I think the main reason is......

It's there/our preference...

I adore dark skin but will chat with others as long as they know my preference.

A lot of the time I would not entertain chatting on here to someone who I am not attracted to as it could be taken as leading someone on.

Kitten xxx"

This most definitely

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By *ucka39Man over a year ago

Newcastle

Basically life is full of choices and decisions, people are entitled to have these,so like here can enjoy themselves so why not just focus on those whom you might connect with get yourself out to a social event or even a club it's a privilege use this to engage with others and expect nothing I never do in life and I'm rewarded by all those who have came into this the world is your oyster

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By *uitednbooted2Man over a year ago

Berkshire

I meet ladies of all ethnicities on fab I just love women full stop . I am also on a MMM group two white guys and two black guys and this is only an observation btw. My black mates are almost getting meets every day and almost exclusively they are white single and married women. They are in demand and are actively being sought out . Read into that what you will !!

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By *andare63Man over a year ago

oldham

"If you just won’t talk to a particular race is racism

I don’t talk to many races of different complexions so does that make me racist??"

Do you mean on here or in general day to day life?

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By *yron69Man over a year ago

Fareham

Colour is just one level of a person. Ethic group another. However often people from a certain group may have more attractive traits to a person than others. For example I see positive attractions in black women and seek them out.

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By *esthetic21Man over a year ago

Birmingham/Bristol

People on here say it preference. I say it's racism

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By *yron69Man over a year ago

Fareham

"People on here say it preference. I say it's racism "

You devalue the real cases of racism by finding racism where it doesn’t exist.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why don’t people ever look past the colour off your skin and get to know you for what you are

For alot of people it won't be skin colour. It will be ethnicity and their preference which is totally fine.

I love nordic looking men (I'm scandinavian myself) and may favour those over anyone else but it's not just looks for alot of people. Personalities are much more important.

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By *esthetic21Man over a year ago

Birmingham/Bristol

"People on here say it preference. I say it's racism

You devalue the real cases of racism by finding racism where it doesn’t exist."
If you write someone off just because of the colour of their skin that's racism. Generally I like white women but there's plenty of non white women I've seen and thought phwoar I really fancy that woman. I wouldn't write off a whole race just because I Generally go for white women. It's undercover racism no doubt about it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"People on here say it preference. I say it's racism

You devalue the real cases of racism by finding racism where it doesn’t exist.If you write someone off just because of the colour of their skin that's racism. Generally I like white women but there's plenty of non white women I've seen and thought phwoar I really fancy that woman. I wouldn't write off a whole race just because I Generally go for white women. It's undercover racism no doubt about it"

Oh well

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By *esthetic21Man over a year ago

Birmingham/Bristol

It's like saying all people of a certain colour/race have this trait or this vice ect ect. If the mainstream media did it or a person with some influence/power they would be dubbed racist instantly

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Having preferences isn't racism.

How you express it may come across in an offensive way. You may not mean it, but isnt that micro aggressions?

When I was in Asia, landlords were open with "no Indians". If you see that kind of things in real life, then see it again in Fab, I can imagine it stings.

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