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This is the End...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Are you good at ending things?
Relationships, jobs, even that awkward meet that's dragged on too long.
Can you easily cut the cord and make a clean break ? Or is it sometimes better to do it gradually ?
Now begin ! |
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By *ack688Man
over a year ago
abruzzo Italy (and UK) |
… Beautiful friend
This is the end
My only friend, the end
Of our elaborate plans, the end
Of everything that stands, the end
No safety or surprise, the end
I'll never look into your eyes again |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes. I'm not very good at putting up with stuff I don't like or have no interest in. I'm pretty good at calling it a day. Life is too short for putting up with stuff. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are you good at ending things?
Relationships, jobs, even that awkward meet that's dragged on too long.
Can you easily cut the cord and make a clean break ? Or is it sometimes better to do it gradually ?
Now begin ! "
Are you trying to tell me something Mr Blooms? |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
Not really. I end up feeling guilty and even if I know something isn't healthy for me/making me happy I find it difficult to actually get to the point where I say no more. What about the other person and how they feel? I don't like upsetting people.
I had to do it relatively recently, something just kind of twigged in me and I realised it wasn't good for me. It was difficult but I was proud of myself. |
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"Are you good at ending things?
Relationships, jobs, even that awkward meet that's dragged on too long.
Can you easily cut the cord and make a clean break ? Or is it sometimes better to do it gradually ?
Now begin ! "
It's never better to do it gradually imo.
I'm my younger days I was rubbish at ending things. Now I'm not. |
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No I'm really really rubbish at it unfortunately. I worry too much about others feelings or being disappointed in me. However, I do have a breaking point and if I cross that then that is that. And I will walk away heath ledger joker style. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What needs to be done, needs to ve done. I go straight to the point as dragging it out doesn't help anybody. I do try to leave it on good terms if possible. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No, I'm not very good at it actually. I find goodbyes hard, would rather just walk away than say goodbye, weirdly. "
I don't find that weird, I'm sure I've done the same. I always felt a little bad afterwards though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I dont seem to be terribly good at stopping conversations if the other person is a chatter too. I spent 20 yrs too long in a relationship I probably should have walked away from in the first week and usually wait until I need admitting to hospital for some reason to quit a job. I need to work on my walking away technique |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Not really. I end up feeling guilty and even if I know something isn't healthy for me/making me happy I find it difficult to actually get to the point where I say no more. What about the other person and how they feel? I don't like upsetting people.
I had to do it relatively recently, something just kind of twigged in me and I realised it wasn't good for me. It was difficult but I was proud of myself."
I think most of us dread those 'ending' conversations, especially if we know it's the right decision but can't easily articulate the reasons. |
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By *rad670Man
over a year ago
South Lakes |
I'm good at ending jobs once I feel the company is taking the mick. I pick a moment when I think I am going to be invaluable even if it's a while after being peed off with them then leave. I'm not a yes man so not popular with crap managers who can't handle people with a strong will. I'm self employed once again and will remain so until I retire now. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Socially I can go out or meet once a week any more than that then I need a break isolated from people apart from Jak that is but we can sit in silence and be happy x"
Hi Jak. Yes, sometimes we can be with lots of people having a great time then suddenly want to leave. |
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It’s never a pleasant thing to do, but it sometimes has to be done.
It’s not a decision I come to lightly and takes a lot of thinking, however once my mind is made up there is no going back, I just say what needs to be said (normally involves a long conversation, so they understand and it’s clear) and it’s done.
I’ve never changed my mind, once a decision is made, so far in my life - so definitely no looking back |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm in agreement with Spurs that it isn't a decision I ever come to lightly but once I've gave it some consideration and time I can do it without a problem but I'd be lying if I said I didn't think about it sometimes depending on who it is.
I really couldn't give two shits about some people I've ended it with and I'm thankful to remove them from my life but there are others where it plays on my mind because I wish things could be different. My mum for example. She's such a toxic and evil person who has done some unforgivable things but I'm gutted we never had a great relationship.
When it comes to things like jobs, I've got no issue at all with ending stuff like that if I know it's the right thing to do. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm in agreement with Spurs that it isn't a decision I ever come to lightly but once I've gave it some consideration and time I can do it without a problem but I'd be lying if I said I didn't think about it sometimes depending on who it is.
I really couldn't give two shits about some people I've ended it with and I'm thankful to remove them from my life but there are others where it plays on my mind because I wish things could be different. My mum for example. She's such a toxic and evil person who has done some unforgivable things but I'm gutted we never had a great relationship.
When it comes to things like jobs, I've got no issue at all with ending stuff like that if I know it's the right thing to do. "
Thanks Lemon. I can't imagine ending a relationship with my parents (or my child), that must have been extraordinarily tough. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm good at ending jobs once I feel the company is taking the mick. I pick a moment when I think I am going to be invaluable even if it's a while after being peed off with them then leave. I'm not a yes man so not popular with crap managers who can't handle people with a strong will. I'm self employed once again and will remain so until I retire now. "
I confess I've always loved ending jobs ! I must be a workshy sod at heart. |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
Everyone I end things with goes on to find great happiness, so I like to think I set them free to find better things, so on reflection, I must be good at ending things.
That’s my reasoning and I’m sticking with it!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No but I’m getting much better at it these days. Maybe just because I’m older and less tolerant?"
Definitely got easier with time for me too. Or practice ? |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Things never end they tend to filter out slowly
For you Yas, or do you mean generally?"
Well well work wise if I didn't like it I believe relationships if we both are not into it then it ends anyway and family well they are always there
X |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Things never end they tend to filter out slowly
For you Yas, or do you mean generally?
Well well work wise if I didn't like it I believe relationships if we both are not into it then it ends anyway and family well they are always there
X"
Work wise I would leave xx |
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By *adyBugsWoman
over a year ago
cognito |
"No but I’m getting much better at it these days. Maybe just because I’m older and less tolerant?
Definitely got easier with time for me too. Or practice ? "
Maybe it’s a combination of both? But it’s more satisfying walking away from things that don’t bring happiness now. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Things never end they tend to filter out slowly
For you Yas, or do you mean generally?
Well well work wise if I didn't like it I believe relationships if we both are not into it then it ends anyway and family well they are always there
X"
Thanks you, and similar to me.x |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Things never end they tend to filter out slowly
For you Yas, or do you mean generally?
Well well work wise if I didn't like it I believe relationships if we both are not into it then it ends anyway and family well they are always there
X
Thanks you, and similar to me.x"
Xxxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’m a little weird and find goodbyes really hard.
I don’t like them at all especially if there’s emotions tied down to it. Could be anything from a relationship or even friendship.
"
Kitty used the word 'weird' earlier but I'd assume this is normal ? We invest so much emotion into some relationship that there is a strong sense of loss or even grief in ending them. |
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"I’m a little weird and find goodbyes really hard.
I don’t like them at all especially if there’s emotions tied down to it. Could be anything from a relationship or even friendship.
Kitty used the word 'weird' earlier but I'd assume this is normal ? We invest so much emotion into some relationship that there is a strong sense of loss or even grief in ending them."
Seems like me and kitty have a bit in common there.
I say weird as I find that it’s usually me who finds or lingers on longer to letting go of those emotions.
The sense of loss and grief would be exactly that. I think we just get used to them being there so when you end things, the absence is felt.
It doesn’t happen to everyone in my life. More those who have an impact on it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends who or what it is and what they have done.
I can and have walked away from toxic people and toxic work environments. No looking back
I see ending as transitions to bigger and better things x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've ended one relationship 4 years ago and it was the best thing I'd ever done, I was proud of myself. Although I was at the receiving end of the end of my recent relationship. Weirdly enough I had started having serious doubts about him but in May last year he ended it. He did me favour though, despite taking a long time to get over it x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Depends who or what it is and what they have done.
I can and have walked away from toxic people and toxic work environments. No looking back
I see ending as transitions to bigger and better things x"
One door closes, another one opens. Or a revolving door? And thanks for inspiring this idea ! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've ended one relationship 4 years ago and it was the best thing I'd ever done, I was proud of myself. Although I was at the receiving end of the end of my recent relationship. Weirdly enough I had started having serious doubts about him but in May last year he ended it. He did me favour though, despite taking a long time to get over it x"
Interesting contrast between relationship and being ended by another. But in this case both for the better so |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are you good at ending things?
Relationships, jobs, even that awkward meet that's dragged on too long.
Can you easily cut the cord and make a clean break ? Or is it sometimes better to do it gradually ?
Now begin ! "
Im the worse at ending....its the fear of whats next |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Are you good at ending things?
Relationships, jobs, even that awkward meet that's dragged on too long.
Can you easily cut the cord and make a clean break ? Or is it sometimes better to do it gradually ?
Now begin !
Im the worse at ending....its the fear of whats next"
That old Devil we know...They say it's better but I'm not convinced. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm in agreement with Spurs that it isn't a decision I ever come to lightly but once I've gave it some consideration and time I can do it without a problem but I'd be lying if I said I didn't think about it sometimes depending on who it is.
I really couldn't give two shits about some people I've ended it with and I'm thankful to remove them from my life but there are others where it plays on my mind because I wish things could be different. My mum for example. She's such a toxic and evil person who has done some unforgivable things but I'm gutted we never had a great relationship.
When it comes to things like jobs, I've got no issue at all with ending stuff like that if I know it's the right thing to do. "
With the parents is a bit more difficult, after they pass away, it comes the guilt and regret for not trying to be a bit more understanding .
Jobs? There are plenty. Parents, not too many. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm really, really bad at it.
I ended up getting married to my ex husband because I was trying to split up with him and was *so* bad at it....."
That's definitely not one of the 50 ways to leave your lover, Posh ! |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"I'm really, really bad at it.
I ended up getting married to my ex husband because I was trying to split up with him and was *so* bad at it.....
That's definitely not one of the 50 ways to leave your lover, Posh ! "
Yeah.... it wasn't my finest hour..... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hate good byes, always want to cry, always have with those I care for. Anything else Im serial killer cold as ice ending."
Never can Say Goodbye...
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ofcgjeELS0M |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When I'm done, I'm done and will just walk away.
It takes a lot for me to get to that point though, but when I am, that's it. "
Same here! X and there’s no turning back! |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"
I think most of us dread those 'ending' conversations, especially if we know it's the right decision but can't easily articulate the reasons."
That's very true. I also don't like hurting people - even if my relationship/dynamic/whatever has come to an end with them, I don't want to be the one who makes them sad. Even if they've hurt me. Pretty fricking stupid I know.
Luckily for me I have some very straight talking, supportive friends who let me waffle and pick the important parts out. |
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"Are you good at ending things?
Relationships, jobs, even that awkward meet that's dragged on too long.
Can you easily cut the cord and make a clean break ? Or is it sometimes better to do it gradually ?
Now begin ! "
I have definitely made a balls of endings a few times in the past but have also go better at it.
Work is very different to relationships though, never feel guilty or awkward about leaving a job, it’s just business and a company wouldn’t think twice about doing something that suited them and impacted me badly so why should I give a fuck about them. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I’m quite rubbish at ending things cleanly.
In the past I’ve just taken the easy way out and fucked off. To be fair there was no way I was having the conversation to be lied to again. "
Sometimes it's the only way and no need to feel bad about doing so. All sort of factors why that conversation can be too difficult to have. |
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By *TK421-Man
over a year ago
Cheltenham |
I am currently trying my hardest to do a gradual walk away from someone who I have strong feelings for.
It's torture. But I they are going through some tough times and I can't leave them cold turkey.
It would be easier on me to walk away.
In general I think it depends on the situation you find yourself in. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I am currently trying my hardest to do a gradual walk away from someone who I have strong feelings for.
It's torture. But I they are going through some tough times and I can't leave them cold turkey.
It would be easier on me to walk away.
In general I think it depends on the situation you find yourself in."
I think you describe a dilemma lots of people face in the 'endgame': the tricky balance between our interests and those of others we care for. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When I'm done, I'm done and will just walk away.
It takes a lot for me to get to that point though, but when I am, that's it.
Same here! X and there’s no turning back! "
'I Will Survive' is in my head reading that. |
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