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Women’s safety
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It very much depends on where the street is. In the small village where I live, yes. At my nan's house in Essex, absolutely not. City centres, nope.
I don't know if it's feeling safe so much, I'm pretty street smart and know how to defend myself, it's more about being aware of potential dangers and not putting yourself in vulnerable situations |
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The stats are beyond grim on this topic.
I really wish it were as simple as "What can we do", but this question shouldn't be aimed at the ladies.
It's an issue for the blokes to tackle, "Men, what can we do to stop other men from harming women".  |
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"The stats are beyond grim on this topic.
I really wish it were as simple as "What can we do", but this question shouldn't be aimed at the ladies.
It's an issue for the blokes to tackle, "Men, what can we do to stop other men from harming women". "
The police are currently in the firing line but do they really have the resources to tackle the issue.
I think it‘s about educating children of both sexes because clearly something is going wrong somewhere  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A busy road during the day, yes I feel safe enough. But anywhere else I always have a small niggle in my mind that something could happen and I'm always a aware of my surroundings.
If you want to make women feel safer, start with men as they are the problem. It's the men you need to watch, not the women. |
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"The stats are beyond grim on this topic.
I really wish it were as simple as "What can we do", but this question shouldn't be aimed at the ladies.
It's an issue for the blokes to tackle, "Men, what can we do to stop other men from harming women".
The police are currently in the firing line but do they really have the resources to tackle the issue.
I think it‘s about educating children of both sexes because clearly something is going wrong somewhere "
Speaking as someone who used to work for the Police in a civil capacity. No, they don't.
I agree, it should be about educating children of both sexes, but the emphasis is on the blokes in this case, that lady didn't go out to get murdered, nor did those sisters on the hill. I feel strongly about this because, in this case, it's absolutely right the men sort this issue out. No one should go out and feel in fear of their lives. |
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"The stats are beyond grim on this topic.
I really wish it were as simple as "What can we do", but this question shouldn't be aimed at the ladies.
It's an issue for the blokes to tackle, "Men, what can we do to stop other men from harming women".
The police are currently in the firing line but do they really have the resources to tackle the issue.
I think it‘s about educating children of both sexes because clearly something is going wrong somewhere
Speaking as someone who used to work for the Police in a civil capacity. No, they don't.
I agree, it should be about educating children of both sexes, but the emphasis is on the blokes in this case, that lady didn't go out to get murdered, nor did those sisters on the hill. I feel strongly about this because, in this case, it's absolutely right the men sort this issue out. No one should go out and feel in fear of their lives. "
I think it’s very difficult to change the behaviour of adults, relearning acceptable behaviour will take as many years as it took to learn the wrong behaviour. Even then there are no guarantees. I’m not saying we do nothing, I just don’t know what the answer is |
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"The stats are beyond grim on this topic.
I really wish it were as simple as "What can we do", but this question shouldn't be aimed at the ladies.
It's an issue for the blokes to tackle, "Men, what can we do to stop other men from harming women".
The police are currently in the firing line but do they really have the resources to tackle the issue.
I think it‘s about educating children of both sexes because clearly something is going wrong somewhere
Speaking as someone who used to work for the Police in a civil capacity. No, they don't.
I agree, it should be about educating children of both sexes, but the emphasis is on the blokes in this case, that lady didn't go out to get murdered, nor did those sisters on the hill. I feel strongly about this because, in this case, it's absolutely right the men sort this issue out. No one should go out and feel in fear of their lives.
I think it’s very difficult to change the behaviour of adults, relearning acceptable behaviour will take as many years as it took to learn the wrong behaviour. Even then there are no guarantees. I’m not saying we do nothing, I just don’t know what the answer is "
I wish we all had a magic wand that would do all that & fix the issue.
Though I agree, it would take years & years of re-education and so forth. And it'd need to be comprehensive education, show the trauma, the years of recovery, the suicides because of it. It's the only way guys will learn, that their actions have dire consequences. Oh, and tell them to stop blaming the victims.
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"A busy road during the day, yes I feel safe enough. But anywhere else I always have a small niggle in my mind that something could happen and I'm always a aware of my surroundings.
If you want to make women feel safer, start with men as they are the problem. It's the men you need to watch, not the women. "
I've witnessed some prolonged, generally unprovoked, violent attacks by women on other men and women unfortunatly.....
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Parents take responsibility for your boys and girls upbringing. Husbands and wives who respect one another are role models. If husbands disrespect their wives then their sons will think this is normal behaviour.
Educators there needs to be more done to ensure that children respect each other regardless of gender.
The media need to take some responsibility
The government should provide more police
Tougher sentences with education a priority
Sexism in the judicial system needs to be dealt with. How a person dresses does make them asking for it - don't victimise the victim
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I generally feel safe now where I live, it's quiet here, and the only people who pass me by are locals who I tend to know.
But when I lived in London it was a very different story.
When walking somewhere in the dark, I found I felt nervous when realising I was in front of somebody else getting closer...
I used to wish they would cross sides so I would know they weren't coming for me!
Yes I know it was paranoia, but I did have valid reason, CPTSD, care of a troubled childhood.
I used to walk with my big bunch of doorkeys in my hand, the intent being if I was attacked I would use them to defend myself.
Luckily I never had to use them in that way.
I realise I would have been in trouble for it if I had used them in anger, as it were, but it seemed my only protection back in those days.
I moved to get away from all that.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its really not just a Female thing. Think its a bit dishonest to frame as that tbh
There are places in Bedford even in male mode I would not go to after dark or even during the day. And im a 6ft2 male, because of that i have been told by gang members that makes me even more of a target |
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"Its really not just a Female thing. Think its a bit dishonest to frame as that tbh
There are places in Bedford even in male mode I would not go to after dark or even during the day. And im a 6ft2 male, because of that i have been told by gang members that makes me even more of a target"
The reasons for male on male violence is very different than male on female violence. But you are right in the sense that male on male violence is a big problem regardless of the reasons |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A busy road during the day, yes I feel safe enough. But anywhere else I always have a small niggle in my mind that something could happen and I'm always a aware of my surroundings.
If you want to make women feel safer, start with men as they are the problem. It's the men you need to watch, not the women.
I've witnessed some prolonged, generally unprovoked, violent attacks by women on other men and women unfortunatly.....
"
Maybe I should rephrase. Men are the much bigger problem. Yes, women can be violent too and I'd never ever try to say that's OK or justify it. But I'm much more worried about my safety because of men and not women and most people I know would agree.
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Where I live, yes, I feel very safe, many people know who I am and always see someone I know. My local town, not in slightest, I drive through it with my doors locked and nervous even when walking through the town centre in the middle of the day |
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"The stats are beyond grim on this topic.
I really wish it were as simple as "What can we do", but this question shouldn't be aimed at the ladies.
It's an issue for the blokes to tackle, "Men, what can we do to stop other men from harming women". "
Agree with this, but it takes understanding the issue to know the potential solutions and there is also something about speaking directly with those adversely affected and actively listening to their lived experiences. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I generally feel safe but do carry a personal alarm, just in case. There has been some worrying reports on the news today but we should still remember the majority of men wouldn’t physically hurt a woman. Indeed many would come to our aid if needed. In terms of what you can do to help, I’d agree with some points already made about being good role models for kids and perhaps crossing the road late at night to give us some space. Thoughtful post OP. |
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"A busy road during the day, yes I feel safe enough. But anywhere else I always have a small niggle in my mind that something could happen and I'm always a aware of my surroundings.
If you want to make women feel safer, start with men as they are the problem. It's the men you need to watch, not the women.
I've witnessed some prolonged, generally unprovoked, violent attacks by women on other men and women unfortunatly.....
Maybe I should rephrase. Men are the much bigger problem. Yes, women can be violent too and I'd never ever try to say that's OK or justify it. But I'm much more worried about my safety because of men and not women and most people I know would agree.
"
Well bend over then young Lady, it's spanky bum time for being correct   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No there's nothing men can do and they shouldn't have to carry that burden. We are all responsible for keeping ourselves safe, being smart when outside and not putting ourselves in a vulnerable position. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No there's nothing men can do and they shouldn't have to carry that burden. We are all responsible for keeping ourselves safe, being smart when outside and not putting ourselves in a vulnerable position."
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"A busy road during the day, yes I feel safe enough. But anywhere else I always have a small niggle in my mind that something could happen and I'm always a aware of my surroundings.
If you want to make women feel safer, start with men as they are the problem. It's the men you need to watch, not the women.
I've witnessed some prolonged, generally unprovoked, violent attacks by women on other men and women unfortunatly.....
"
Having been on receiving end it was reported lets just say police had zero interest and therein lies a problem in itself. No matter who causes the problem male or female it needs sorting out. |
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"No there's nothing men can do and they shouldn't have to carry that burden. "
Exactly this, men as a collective cannot possibly be held responsible for the actions of a small minority of individuals. Bad people are bad people, regardless of gender. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A busy road during the day, yes I feel safe enough. But anywhere else I always have a small niggle in my mind that something could happen and I'm always a aware of my surroundings.
If you want to make women feel safer, start with men as they are the problem. It's the men you need to watch, not the women.
I've witnessed some prolonged, generally unprovoked, violent attacks by women on other men and women unfortunatly.....
Maybe I should rephrase. Men are the much bigger problem. Yes, women can be violent too and I'd never ever try to say that's OK or justify it. But I'm much more worried about my safety because of men and not women and most people I know would agree.
"
Men are not a much bigger problem. The biggest problem is definitely caused by some men but that doesn't make men the problem. Your logic is no different to saying Muslims are responsible for dealing with Islamist extremism because they are all Muslims.
I agree that us men should do all we can to help women feel safe - and if there is any specific advice then I'd gladly follow it. However, if I take care to cross a street, change my pace, sing Yankee doodle dandy or whatever as I walk to make a lone woman feel safer, while in that particular instance it may make a woman feel safer it won't in any way change the predatory behavoir of a certain subset of men. That requires all of society. I am no more responsible for the behaviour of a murder/rapist than the guy who cuts my hair in the Turkish barbers is responsible for the Manchester arena bombings. To suggest otherwise is ridiculous.
Mr |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"especially as one person put it above 'the ladies' ....."
What term would you prefer and have you asked the opinion of the other 4 billion females on the planet to check they're happy with it?
Mr |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't ovethink those things usually. I carry on with don't fuck with me attitude usually so I hardly never get approached in a sleazy way. If i do I am sharp tongued enough to get out of the trouble  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A busy road during the day, yes I feel safe enough. But anywhere else I always have a small niggle in my mind that something could happen and I'm always a aware of my surroundings.
If you want to make women feel safer, start with men as they are the problem. It's the men you need to watch, not the women.
I've witnessed some prolonged, generally unprovoked, violent attacks by women on other men and women unfortunatly.....
Maybe I should rephrase. Men are the much bigger problem. Yes, women can be violent too and I'd never ever try to say that's OK or justify it. But I'm much more worried about my safety because of men and not women and most people I know would agree.
Men are not a much bigger problem. The biggest problem is definitely caused by some men but that doesn't make men the problem. Your logic is no different to saying Muslims are responsible for dealing with Islamist extremism because they are all Muslims.
I agree that us men should do all we can to help women feel safe - and if there is any specific advice then I'd gladly follow it. However, if I take care to cross a street, change my pace, sing Yankee doodle dandy or whatever as I walk to make a lone woman feel safer, while in that particular instance it may make a woman feel safer it won't in any way change the predatory behavoir of a certain subset of men. That requires all of society. I am no more responsible for the behaviour of a murder/rapist than the guy who cuts my hair in the Turkish barbers is responsible for the Manchester arena bombings. To suggest otherwise is ridiculous.
Mr"
#NotAllMen
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
"A busy road during the day, yes I feel safe enough. But anywhere else I always have a small niggle in my mind that something could happen and I'm always a aware of my surroundings.
If you want to make women feel safer, start with men as they are the problem. It's the men you need to watch, not the women.
I've witnessed some prolonged, generally unprovoked, violent attacks by women on other men and women unfortunatly.....
Maybe I should rephrase. Men are the much bigger problem. Yes, women can be violent too and I'd never ever try to say that's OK or justify it. But I'm much more worried about my safety because of men and not women and most people I know would agree.
Men are not a much bigger problem. The biggest problem is definitely caused by some men but that doesn't make men the problem. Your logic is no different to saying Muslims are responsible for dealing with Islamist extremism because they are all Muslims.
I agree that us men should do all we can to help women feel safe - and if there is any specific advice then I'd gladly follow it. However, if I take care to cross a street, change my pace, sing Yankee doodle dandy or whatever as I walk to make a lone woman feel safer, while in that particular instance it may make a woman feel safer it won't in any way change the predatory behavoir of a certain subset of men. That requires all of society. I am no more responsible for the behaviour of a murder/rapist than the guy who cuts my hair in the Turkish barbers is responsible for the Manchester arena bombings. To suggest otherwise is ridiculous.
Mr"
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