FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > When I joined fab.....
When I joined fab.....
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I thought it was a hook up site...during my time I discovered the forums and it became my go to section of the site,I kinda gave up on looking for hook ups because I was enjoying the forums....the good and the bad....I enjoyed both....but now.....its pretty dull...the same people fawning over the same people...the popcorners who are afraid to post...the white knights....
Im not blaming anyone but myself because as everyone says...you get out what you put in....lol been here over a year and still don't feel welcome....but thats OK I know im a sulking arsehole lol
Let people spout there strange beliefs...controversy is good..it shows passion....
Take care my fabbers and fabettes
I love most of you xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I thought it was a hook up site...during my time I discovered the forums and it became my go to section of the site,I kinda gave up on looking for hook ups because I was enjoying the forums....the good and the bad....I enjoyed both....but now.....its pretty dull...the same people fawning over the same people...the popcorners who are afraid to post...the white knights....
Im not blaming anyone but myself because as everyone says...you get out what you put in....lol been here over a year and still don't feel welcome....but thats OK I know im a sulking arsehole lol
Let people spout there strange beliefs...controversy is good..it shows passion....
Take care my fabbers and fabettes
I love most of you xxx"
Hey Noochie, we don't speak much, or agree that often, but I like that you're here. If that means anything at all.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't mind your posts for the most part but I think we all go through stages of being sulking arseholes and not finding any good in the forums.
I do have to say though that when that happens, I tend not not post as much until I feel better because I don't want to bring others down to my level. Just my 2 cents worth |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hope your ok op
You can use the site for both or more like I do
That place for me is a safe place that I can express my true self without have people juge me
I use it for everything
Need a random hook up fab
Looking to date fab
Injoy the forums fab
As the comeing month pass I be pulling back from the forums though not for any particular reason
Just be back to useing fab how I use to as I start meeting agein
I still be around a bit on the days that I haven’t got a meet or that but they definitely be less time on the forums
And more times trying to date woman or get to know some better
Being a 3rd for couples
And hooking up with random guys to scratch a ich |
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"I thought it was a hook up site...during my time I discovered the forums and it became my go to section of the site,I kinda gave up on looking for hook ups because I was enjoying the forums....the good and the bad....I enjoyed both....but now.....its pretty dull...the same people fawning over the same people...the popcorners who are afraid to post...the white knights....
Im not blaming anyone but myself because as everyone says...you get out what you put in....lol been here over a year and still don't feel welcome....but thats OK I know im a sulking arsehole lol
Let people spout there strange beliefs...controversy is good..it shows passion....
Take care my fabbers and fabettes
I love most of you xxx
Hey Noochie, we don't speak much, or agree that often, but I like that you're here. If that means anything at all. "
Same here. He's a face and name I recognise and seems a decent enough chap. Despite how he seems to be speaking, he will be missed if he leaves the forums.
FAB forums can get disheartening if you feel constantly overlooked, and the same people are always talked about, especially if you already have low self-esteem or are feel a little depressed.
But that's just how it is. People will always talk to or about their friends more. That doesn't mean you aren't liked or respected.
The more you are here and join in, the more likely it is others will start to recognise you, and if they don't, don't fret. The forums aren't life. They are supposed to be a little bit of lighthearted fun.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I thought it was a hook up site...during my time I discovered the forums and it became my go to section of the site,I kinda gave up on looking for hook ups because I was enjoying the forums....the good and the bad....I enjoyed both....but now.....its pretty dull...the same people fawning over the same people...the popcorners who are afraid to post...the white knights....
Im not blaming anyone but myself because as everyone says...you get out what you put in....lol been here over a year and still don't feel welcome....but thats OK I know im a sulking arsehole lol
Let people spout there strange beliefs...controversy is good..it shows passion....
Take care my fabbers and fabettes
I love most of you xxx
Hey Noochie, we don't speak much, or agree that often, but I like that you're here. If that means anything at all.
Same here. He's a face and name I recognise and seems a decent enough chap. Despite how he seems to be speaking, he will be missed if he leaves the forums.
FAB forums can get disheartening if you feel constantly overlooked, and the same people are always talked about, especially if you already have low self-esteem or are feel a little depressed.
But that's just how it is. People will always talk to or about their friends more. That doesn't mean you aren't liked or respected.
The more you are here and join in, the more likely it is others will start to recognise you, and if they don't, don't fret. The forums aren't life. They are supposed to be a little bit of lighthearted fun.
"
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
I've been on this site for over 12 years, and it's always evolving.
Yes, the Forums for example, can be daunting at times. Yes, there are those who set up threads then only deal with their little set of friends to the expense of ignoring anyone else.
Yes, I've seen individuals pass through, each with their own personality, but who have moved on. People you wanted to meet in a pub one day & make the world better. Or people you knew you'd be at loggerheads with at once.
I use it for varied reasons; sourcing meets, viewing others, dipping into the Forums from time to time.
You get out by way of what you put in. But it's almost like a family, who if they are aware of your issues, go out of their way with support and wanting to help.
Yes, there are idiots, but so has every site. You soon forget about them. On the whole, it's a great site, if you open your eyes. |
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By *mma29Couple
over a year ago
wirral |
"I've been on this site for over 12 years, and it's always evolving.
Yes, the Forums for example, can be daunting at times. Yes, there are those who set up threads then only deal with their little set of friends to the expense of ignoring anyone else.
Yes, I've seen individuals pass through, each with their own personality, but who have moved on. People you wanted to meet in a pub one day & make the world better. Or people you knew you'd be at loggerheads with at once.
I use it for varied reasons; sourcing meets, viewing others, dipping into the Forums from time to time.
You get out by way of what you put in. But it's almost like a family, who if they are aware of your issues, go out of their way with support and wanting to help.
Yes, there are idiots, but so has every site. You soon forget about them. On the whole, it's a great site, if you open your eyes."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on this site for over 12 years, and it's always evolving.
Yes, the Forums for example, can be daunting at times. Yes, there are those who set up threads then only deal with their little set of friends to the expense of ignoring anyone else.
Yes, I've seen individuals pass through, each with their own personality, but who have moved on. People you wanted to meet in a pub one day & make the world better. Or people you knew you'd be at loggerheads with at once.
I use it for varied reasons; sourcing meets, viewing others, dipping into the Forums from time to time.
You get out by way of what you put in. But it's almost like a family, who if they are aware of your issues, go out of their way with support and wanting to help.
Yes, there are idiots, but so has every site. You soon forget about them. On the whole, it's a great site, if you open your eyes."
Hope you feel better OP. And others who feel the same.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Think of the forums as your new local pub and you've just moved in to the area.
They sell the drinks you like, and a nice array of snacks to nibble on.
Take your seat and have a look around. You see the pool table, dart board and a little poker school in the corner. You want to play, but you don't know anyone yet.
Over time, you start chatting to people. Some you connect with, some you don't. Some are welcoming, some less so. Over time some of these relationships blossom, some wane. But you still come to the pub because its an outlet, somewhere you feel comfortable.
My point. Fab is like real life in some respects. We can't and won't be everyone's friend, but do we really need to be? But what you put in is what you get out. But at some point you might just have a cracking night. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your a good guy man.
When we have spoken always found you honest and usually a good understanding of whats going on.
No matter the struggle keep moving forward |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lol I don't feel welcome, but it doesn't stop me. Creepily reading and observing you all  . Sometimes being one of the in crowd is over rated, maybe being a loose cannon is the way to go."
Fwiw I like seeing you on the forum, you should post more x |
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"I thought it was a hook up site...during my time I discovered the forums and it became my go to section of the site,I kinda gave up on looking for hook ups because I was enjoying the forums....the good and the bad....I enjoyed both....but now.....its pretty dull...the same people fawning over the same people...the popcorners who are afraid to post...the white knights....
Im not blaming anyone but myself because as everyone says...you get out what you put in....lol been here over a year and still don't feel welcome....but thats OK I know im a sulking arsehole lol
Let people spout there strange beliefs...controversy is good..it shows passion....
Take care my fabbers and fabettes
I love most of you xxx"
I really like seeing you about the place you proper make me smile  |
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"Lol I don't feel welcome, but it doesn't stop me. Creepily reading and observing you all . Sometimes being one of the in crowd is over rated, maybe being a loose cannon is the way to go.
Fwiw I like seeing you on the forum, you should post more x"
Thanks x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a look through the forum list and often close the app. It’s become a tumble environment with little or no interest.
The number of personality/popularity validation threads gets on my pip  "
Oh yessss, seconded! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a look through the forum list and often close the app. It’s become a tumble environment with little or no interest.
The number of personality/popularity validation threads gets on my pip "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a look through the forum list and often close the app. It’s become a tumble environment with little or no interest.
The number of personality/popularity validation threads gets on my pip "
As usual DC you are a leading light xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a look through the forum list and often close the app. It’s become a tumble environment with little or no interest.
The number of personality/popularity validation threads gets on my pip "
I thought everyone was here for a tumble ?  |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
Hey Noochie, sorry to hear you're not enjoying it again, thought you'd turned a corner a little while back and you were happier 
Don't really know what to suggest other than the usual "if the fun stops, stop" take a break suggestions. That's the best thing. See if the real world can fill you up instead.
Good luck dude. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a look through the forum list and often close the app. It’s become a tumble environment with little or no interest.
The number of personality/popularity validation threads gets on my pip "
This this and this |
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By *ost SockMan
over a year ago
West Wales and Cardiff |
"Think of the forums as your new local pub and you've just moved in to the area.
They sell the drinks you like, and a nice array of snacks to nibble on.
Take your seat and have a look around. You see the pool table, dart board and a little poker school in the corner. You want to play, but you don't know anyone yet.
Over time, you start chatting to people. Some you connect with, some you don't. Some are welcoming, some less so. Over time some of these relationships blossom, some wane. But you still come to the pub because its an outlet, somewhere you feel comfortable.
My point. Fab is like real life in some respects. We can't and won't be everyone's friend, but do we really need to be? But what you put in is what you get out. But at some point you might just have a cracking night. "
This is a pretty spot-on analogy, I think.
I’ve been here ten years and have always enjoyed the forums - I’ve made some good friends and had great support/advice.
I totally get that other people will have had different experiences, though.
I think it’s important to just loaf around doing your own thing, and not see it as a popularity contest. I’ve posted searingly inciteful, revelatory comments that deserve to be heard the world over - nothing; I’ve posted utter drivel about, I dunno, a cat in Tamworth that looks like Jacob Rees-Mogg - loads of replies.
That’s forums - deeply imperfect, ridiculous places, but potentially lovely if you pull up a barstool and just sit back. |
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I've been off and on here for almost 5 years and this is my 4th profile. The first 2 only lasted a few months for various reasons and despite having the last one for 18 months I didn't log in for almost a year.
I found my feet with this profile in early 2019 and the forums have been a big part of my journey so far.
I haven't sent a first contact message in 18 months even as part of a forum game and every conversation I have had in that time has been through messages from people who have seen something they liked in my profile and/or forum post. The last 3 messages have been from women who said they never ever message first but something about my profile drew them in.
Posting in the lounge is a completely different experience to the Irish forum because it's a whole different world.
The scene in Ireland is completely different in regard to clubs and socials and so much of what I see discussed in here is alien to me and many others.
I ignore the validation threads and any that mention a particular fabber because I've never chatted to any of them and I'm not in those circles.
I don't blow smoke either and prefer to say things as I see them which often means typing and deleting before posting rather than get too wound up.
Apart from that I don't take this place too seriously.
I have made some great friends during the last 5 years, some of whom are no longer on the site.
I've also made a number of fairweather friends who turned out not to be the people I thought they were but that's life and you have to take the rough with the smooth. |
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"I have a look through the forum list and often close the app. It’s become a tumble environment with little or no interest.
The number of personality/popularity validation threads gets on my pip
I thought everyone was here for a tumble ? "
It doesn’t like the w e e d word |
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"I have a look through the forum list and often close the app. It’s become a tumble environment with little or no interest.
The number of personality/popularity validation threads gets on my pip
This this and this "
& this
OP I think it's great you've spoken out like this & really hope it's helped getting it off your chest. The forums are a funny old place as you know. I tend to just laugh (& cringe) more than anything these days & only comment on posts i want to. The rest i just ignore (& laugh/cringe again). Hope to see you back posting again soon. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
Sometimes one tricky 1:2:1s I’ll remind staff it’s only work, it’s not all of life, it’s a big part for some and too big and I suspect and that causes problems. Fab is like that for some people I suspect. My advice, keep fab in a fairly small box. |
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. I used the chat rooms mostly then. Until about five years ago. Someone saw me on cam . In none directing room. ‘ Outed’ me at work. I was on holiday. So then kept low profile . Using forums . But not posting much. Now yes post more . Plus age against me, I am retired. Started to view , message profiles again. A lot yes has changed on Fab. Always been difficult for single male. I will stay lol and try to entertain myself on forums. Plus never know may get lucky 
