FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Squirting: Is it the new 'pressure'?
Squirting: Is it the new 'pressure'?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I first experienced squirting 10 years ago. It was the first time it had happened to her but I hadn't even heard of it until then. It was rather a surprise to both of us at the time.
It happened only very few more times throughout several years.
I ventured into Fab a few months ago and it seems prevalent here. It's a if every woman squirts as par for the course during sex.
I find this hard to believe. Perhaps I've led a sheltered life and have had very few sexual partners but when did this become so 'normal'?
Do women feel the need to squirt and be 'normal' and in turn, do the men feel somewhat incompetent if a woman doesn't squirt during their play?
In my younger days, I remember the 'pressure' was on women merely to orgasm!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think porn definitely put a huge pressure on women and men on certain acts that they feel need to happen when having sex.. whether it’s squirting, or having an anal orgasm or take a pounding like there’s no tomorrow AND LOVING IT too x
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh."
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one. |
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By *asha86Couple
over a year ago
walsall |
D here.... Not every woman can/does ive experienced it in previous relationships but not all of them. The wife can squirt but its not everytime we play.
For me as long as she gets her O im happy! Its hot when it does happen but i would never put pressure on her to expect it if it happens it happens lol  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think porn definitely put a huge pressure on women and men on certain acts that they feel need to happen when having sex.. whether it’s squirting, or having an anal orgasm or take a pounding like there’s no tomorrow AND LOVING IT too x
"
Spot on. I suppose it made worse by the easy access we now have to it all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was 40 the first time I squirted, the guy I was seeing at the time was bit of an expert in making me squirt and it’s almost as tho once it’s been done a few times it becomes much easier and happens more frequently. Some men obviously find it a huge turn on but but I’ve never felt under pressure to do it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I first experienced squirting 10 years ago. It was the first time it had happened to her but I hadn't even heard of it until then. It was rather a surprise to both of us at the time.
It happened only very few more times throughout several years.
I ventured into Fab a few months ago and it seems prevalent here. It's a if every woman squirts as par for the course during sex.
I find this hard to believe. Perhaps I've led a sheltered life and have had very few sexual partners but when did this become so 'normal'?
Do women feel the need to squirt and be 'normal' and in turn, do the men feel somewhat incompetent if a woman doesn't squirt during their play?
In my younger days, I remember the 'pressure' was on women merely to orgasm!! "
Maybe having a wider accessibility to porn is a factor and it can put undue pressure on.
It is not a bodily function I can do some guys see that as a challenge which is worse as it's not like milking a cow at all and it hurts
It can make you feel inadequate at times, if I am not enough then I'm not for you.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one."
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"D here.... Not every woman can/does ive experienced it in previous relationships but not all of them. The wife can squirt but its not everytime we play.
For me as long as she gets her O im happy! Its hot when it does happen but i would never put pressure on her to expect it if it happens it happens lol "
Quite right and that is the message people should hear.
Judging by the number of men, especially younger ones, who profess to being experts at making women squirt, it seems to have become an expectation. |
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Neither of us understand the obsession with squirting. It's very messy and doesn't do anything for us. We have turned down opportunities to meet some otherwise very appealing people because they say they are squirters. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new."
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Neither of us understand the obsession with squirting. It's very messy and doesn't do anything for us. We have turned down opportunities to meet some otherwise very appealing people because they say they are squirters. "
I think your opinion is probably more common that it seems but that 'pressure' to 'conform' seems to be building. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Apparently squirting isn't an orgasm...so men need to get over themselves...thinking they're a sex god 
I've never squirted so I've zero experience of it but I have chatted to some women who do & some wish they didn't squirt
1. Cos of the mess
2. Cos the man thinks it's an orgasm & he'll stop pleasuring
Some women who squirt have also said it's peeeeeeeeee... It's clear to see from done vids that the liquid IS coming from the Urethra not the Vagina   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"i must have been crap at sex as a young un cos i never met a squirter or heard of it until i joined fab first time around haha"
There are many many many things I hadn't heard of or seen before I joined Fab. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think porn definitely put a huge pressure on women and men on certain acts that they feel need to happen when having sex.. whether it’s squirting, or having an anal orgasm or take a pounding like there’s no tomorrow AND LOVING IT too x
Spot on. I suppose it made worse by the easy access we now have to it all."
Absolutely! I mean young teens have had access to it and surely with all the sites and apps (I mean even I did at the time and I’ve just turned 30 so I’m of a different generation compared to the young ones now who literally never knew what life was before the internet) they get exposed to it at such a young age it gives out a distorted reality of what sex really is… for both boys and girls
It is kind of twisted when you think of it!
I get told and asked a lot “can we do this can we do that… are you able to have an anal orgasm (the list goes on)” when it’s clearly totally porn dictated! (Which is mostly fake) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Neither of us understand the obsession with squirting. It's very messy and doesn't do anything for us. We have turned down opportunities to meet some otherwise very appealing people because they say they are squirters.
I think your opinion is probably more common that it seems but that 'pressure' to 'conform' seems to be building."
I think people owe it to themselves to stop measuring their sexual satisfaction by what others claim they can do.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Apparently squirting isn't an orgasm...so men need to get over themselves...thinking they're a sex god
I've never squirted so I've zero experience of it but I have chatted to some women who do & some wish they didn't squirt
1. Cos of the mess
2. Cos the man thinks it's an orgasm & he'll stop pleasuring
Some women who squirt have also said it's peeeeeeeeee... It's clear to see from done vids that the liquid IS coming from the Urethra not the Vagina "
I researched on it and apparently it’s a mixture of urine and vaginal fluid but mostly it’s pee? That’s why it’s so… watery? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Apparently squirting isn't an orgasm...so men need to get over themselves...thinking they're a sex god
I've never squirted so I've zero experience of it but I have chatted to some women who do & some wish they didn't squirt
1. Cos of the mess
2. Cos the man thinks it's an orgasm & he'll stop pleasuring
Some women who squirt have also said it's peeeeeeeeee... It's clear to see from done vids that the liquid IS coming from the Urethra not the Vagina "
You're right, it isn't an orgasm, only part of the journey to it, which is why it confuses me about the apparent obsession with it.
With regards to it being pee, when it first happened to she and I, we were questioning it also. She couldn't tell precisely because the sensations were similar. Subsequently, I must say it does not smell like pee. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My ex was 50 and had never had it happen to any previous partner so it took us both by surprise. He called himself magic fingers afterwards. That was 20 years ago.
I actually like it when it doesn't happen but some men see it as a goal  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My ex was 50 and had never had it happen to any previous partner so it took us both by surprise. He called himself magic fingers afterwards. That was 20 years ago.
I actually like it when it doesn't happen but some men see it as a goal "
Magic fingers haahha   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think porn definitely put a huge pressure on women and men on certain acts that they feel need to happen when having sex.. whether it’s squirting, or having an anal orgasm or take a pounding like there’s no tomorrow AND LOVING IT too x
Spot on. I suppose it made worse by the easy access we now have to it all.
Absolutely! I mean young teens have had access to it and surely with all the sites and apps (I mean even I did at the time and I’ve just turned 30 so I’m of a different generation compared to the young ones now who literally never knew what life was before the internet) they get exposed to it at such a young age it gives out a distorted reality of what sex really is… for both boys and girls
It is kind of twisted when you think of it!
I get told and asked a lot “can we do this can we do that… are you able to have an anal orgasm (the list goes on)” when it’s clearly totally porn dictated! (Which is mostly fake)"
There's the pity of it all. The expectation to have to perform acts that were staged and to match the performance!! There must be something wrong if you don't enjoy it must be what the young think. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't care for squirting tbh, it's piss, nothing else just piss.. And who cares if girl squirts, more interested as to her enjoying herself, too much pressure takes the fun out of it  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Neither of us understand the obsession with squirting. It's very messy and doesn't do anything for us. We have turned down opportunities to meet some otherwise very appealing people because they say they are squirters.
I think your opinion is probably more common that it seems but that 'pressure' to 'conform' seems to be building.
I think people owe it to themselves to stop measuring their sexual satisfaction by what others claim they can do.
"
Hear. Hear. If only though....I'm of an age and assuredness to say I can't do something nor enjoy it. A much younger person may not have that self assurance yet, unfortunately. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"At my age in the throes of excitement I don’t know if I’ve squirted pissed or gushed, I’m just grab on tight and take a deep breath "
Bravo!! That's the way to enjoy it. |
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By *tue555Man
over a year ago
Passed Beyond Reach |
It is simply a big merit badge, bragg. If a guy can make a woman quirt then he must be amazing sexual god, and all women will want him - defines him as far more amazing than another guy in the sack. Sure the importance it has been grossly exaggerated by porn which seem to be the latest in thing.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can't say I've ever felt pressure to do anything. Maybe that is a reflection on how I chose who I chat to. For me it's just something that does sometimes happen. It's never a goal, and not something I often chat about with those I meet so no pressure.
I avoid anyone who sees sex as some sort of tick box competition. It's easy enough to do so I'm not sure why anyone would put themselves in a situation where they do feel pressure to do anything. |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I don't think I've ever squirted, got very wet yes but not sure if I've squirted. I don't agree that it should be a thing that's almost expected to happen (like anal, you wouldn't believe the amount of my friends who have had anal sex and often it's because they feel they should rather than want to). I think it's popular because it's almost seen as being more pleasure, like you've intensified the woman's enjoyment.
Whatever it is, it's enjoyable for some and that's enough. No one should feel pressure to do it but on the same hand women who do shouldn't be made to feel bad. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think porn definitely put a huge pressure on women and men on certain acts that they feel need to happen when having sex.. whether it’s squirting, or having an anal orgasm or take a pounding like there’s no tomorrow AND LOVING IT too x
Spot on. I suppose it made worse by the easy access we now have to it all.
Absolutely! I mean young teens have had access to it and surely with all the sites and apps (I mean even I did at the time and I’ve just turned 30 so I’m of a different generation compared to the young ones now who literally never knew what life was before the internet) they get exposed to it at such a young age it gives out a distorted reality of what sex really is… for both boys and girls
It is kind of twisted when you think of it!
I get told and asked a lot “can we do this can we do that… are you able to have an anal orgasm (the list goes on)” when it’s clearly totally porn dictated! (Which is mostly fake)
There's the pity of it all. The expectation to have to perform acts that were staged and to match the performance!! There must be something wrong if you don't enjoy it must be what the young think."
Exactly!!! totally bang on, and as that’s how they see sex should be
A bit for me like anal orgasm from getting railed, I get asked that a lot and my answer is..” it can happen (not very often at all) but I can’t promise. Either way just know that for me it’s more about the act of penetration that makes me feel good than the anal orgasm” it’s just an added little bonus if it happens, nothing more.
So it puts less pressure on both to “perform” but also it is true what I say to guys x
Now switch that with a squirting act and I think it’s very relatable x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Don't care for squirting tbh, it's piss, nothing else just piss.. And who cares if girl squirts, more interested as to her enjoying herself, too much pressure takes the fun out of it "
Precisely....just enjoy the pleasure of the experience in its entirety. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It is simply a big merit badge, bragg. If a guy can make a woman quirt then he must be amazing sexual god, and all women will want him - defines him as far more amazing than another guy in the sack. Sure the importance it has been grossly exaggerated by porn which seem to be the latest in thing.
It does feel like a merit badge brag. Squirting is real, whatever the actual substance is but it shouldn't be a goal. It's merely part of the enjoyment and some men seem to be getting the message that this is what ALL women want.
"
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"I was 40 the first time I squirted, the guy I was seeing at the time was bit of an expert in making me squirt and it’s almost as tho once it’s been done a few times it becomes much easier and happens more frequently. Some men obviously find it a huge turn on but but I’ve never felt under pressure to do it "
My experience is similar though i had no clue what it was when it first happened. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"My ex was 50 and had never had it happen to any previous partner so it took us both by surprise. He called himself magic fingers afterwards. That was 20 years ago.
I actually like it when it doesn't happen but some men see it as a goal
Magic fingers haahha "
I remember the first time he said it, ch*ked on my tea laughing so much. Bless him though, he had problems with his equipment so he was made up. Rip x
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I can't say I've ever felt pressure to do anything. Maybe that is a reflection on how I chose who I chat to. For me it's just something that does sometimes happen. It's never a goal, and not something I often chat about with those I meet so no pressure.
I avoid anyone who sees sex as some sort of tick box competition. It's easy enough to do so I'm not sure why anyone would put themselves in a situation where they do feel pressure to do anything. "
Very true. Would you say you felt the same confidence to not conform in your late teens or early twenties perhaps? |
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"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created."
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere! |
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I think there's a lot of pressure one can potentially feel from just reading the forum. I occasionally wonder if I'm not quite like other women after reading some threads and not just because I don't squirt (what a horrible word that is). Luckily I've been around long enough to know we're all different but I feel very sad when I see that people compare themselves to others and it actually stops them meeting because they feel inadequate.  .
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"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere! "
I don't either. Some guys take it as a personal insult. Don't compare yourself to other women |
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Imho, it shouldn't ever be a goal or destination tried for, if it happens, and the people involved enjoy, then amazing.
If it doesn't then you have less of a wet patch to try and cover with towels/turn the mattress (unless it's gone through) before sleep
But that sums up most of sex, enjoy the journey and not just getting there xx |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
I find it odd, I never experienced it once until fab and thought it was fake in porn. It’s seems very common with people I meet and even people I know who didn’t squirt end up squirting when they start swinging / join fab. My theory is it’s some kind of sexual liberation switch |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere! "
haha people like to say how fucking great they are at sex on here mainly bollox most of the time sounds to me like your normal and what you read on here is mostly bullshit haha  |
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"Imho, it shouldn't ever be a goal or destination tried for, if it happens, and the people involved enjoy, then amazing.
If it doesn't then you have less of a wet patch to try and cover with towels/turn the mattress (unless it's gone through) before sleep
But that sums up most of sex, enjoy the journey and not just getting there xx"
Never was truer word spoken |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I don't think I've ever squirted, got very wet yes but not sure if I've squirted. I don't agree that it should be a thing that's almost expected to happen (like anal, you wouldn't believe the amount of my friends who have had anal sex and often it's because they feel they should rather than want to). I think it's popular because it's almost seen as being more pleasure, like you've intensified the woman's enjoyment.
Whatever it is, it's enjoyable for some and that's enough. No one should feel pressure to do it but on the same hand women who do shouldn't be made to feel bad."
Well said. Do you get the sense that it’s almost an expectation amongst the younger crowd? Your mentioning of anal is prime example, ‘should’ rather than ‘want’ because it has been portrayed often enough to have become normalised.
The portrayal of squirting as being some form of intense pleasure is the perception that needs correcting. It’s PART of the pleasure and some can, some can’t, some do, some don’t, some will, some won’t. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere!
I don't either. Some guys take it as a personal insult. Don't compare yourself to other women "
But I think, can’t people enjoy sex for what it is? I think especially when male orgasms and women orgasms don’t work exactly the same..
I enjoy way more sex (penetration and oral) than the final act really LOL |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
It gets a bit boring sometimes when the first thing mentioned in a message to you is “are you a squirter/gusher”, and even more boring when you respond with no and they proceed to tell you that you just haven’t been fucked right and so you should meet them and they’ll have you squirting in no time.
It’s not something I look for in a man (the ability to make ladies squirt) nor is it something I feel I am missing out on, or even something I particularly want to experience.
And I find those that bang on about it in messages a major turn off.
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"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere!
I don't either. Some guys take it as a personal insult. Don't compare yourself to other women
But I think, can’t people enjoy sex for what it is? I think especially when male orgasms and women orgasms don’t work exactly the same..
I enjoy way more sex (penetration and oral) than the final act really LOL "
I wish everyone could just enjoy sex how *they* want to rather than how they think everyone else is doing it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I can't say I've ever felt pressure to do anything. Maybe that is a reflection on how I chose who I chat to. For me it's just something that does sometimes happen. It's never a goal, and not something I often chat about with those I meet so no pressure.
I avoid anyone who sees sex as some sort of tick box competition. It's easy enough to do so I'm not sure why anyone would put themselves in a situation where they do feel pressure to do anything.
Very true. Would you say you felt the same confidence to not conform in your late teens or early twenties perhaps?"
Absolutely. I didn't have sex until I met my husband when I was 20 purely because every guy I'd been involved with up to that point did something to put me off. So even then I had no desire to conform and had the confidence to say I didn't want to do something. |
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"It gets a bit boring sometimes when the first thing mentioned in a message to you is “are you a squirter/gusher”, and even more boring when you respond with no and they proceed to tell you that you just haven’t been fucked right and so you should meet them and they’ll have you squirting in no time.
It’s not something I look for in a man (the ability to make ladies squirt) nor is it something I feel I am missing out on, or even something I particularly want to experience.
And I find those that bang on about it in messages a major turn off.
"
Same when we get messages saying how surprised they are that I don't like oral, as if I'm some kind of weirdo. Followed by suggestions that I lack confidence, am ashamed of my genitals, just haven't experienced someone who "does it right" blah, blah, blah. Men who don't like oral are treated the same way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It gets a bit boring sometimes when the first thing mentioned in a message to you is “are you a squirter/gusher”, and even more boring when you respond with no and they proceed to tell you that you just haven’t been fucked right and so you should meet them and they’ll have you squirting in no time.
It’s not something I look for in a man (the ability to make ladies squirt) nor is it something I feel I am missing out on, or even something I particularly want to experience.
And I find those that bang on about it in messages a major turn off.
"
Drives me up the walls when they come back with “you haven’t been fucked well enough”
DUDE… how dare you! |
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"Apparently squirting isn't an orgasm...so men need to get over themselves...thinking they're a sex god
I've never squirted so I've zero experience of it but I have chatted to some women who do & some wish they didn't squirt
1. Cos of the mess
2. Cos the man thinks it's an orgasm & he'll stop pleasuring
Some women who squirt have also said it's peeeeeeeeee... It's clear to see from done vids that the liquid IS coming from the Urethra not the Vagina "
Well said Lia Maria.
I have occasionally been a squirter and hate it.
It's an involuntary contraction of the bladder under vaginal stimulation. Consequently it's very messy as you say and some men consider it the Holy Grail of the female orgasm (it's not for me) and become fixated on it rather than the interests of their partner. |
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"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere!
I don't either. Some guys take it as a personal insult. Don't compare yourself to other women
But I think, can’t people enjoy sex for what it is? I think especially when male orgasms and women orgasms don’t work exactly the same..
I enjoy way more sex (penetration and oral) than the final act really LOL "
Absolutely this! It doesn’t mean I haven’t enjoyed it. I’m trying really hard not to compare myself to others, I’ve deleted my accounts here in the last because of how it made me feel, but I’ve been working on my confidence more lately and am determined to use the feelings it generates in a positive way x |
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Your questions are very apt OP. Until I joined Fab, I never knew what squirting was and younger guys in particular would keep asking me if I could do it which became annoying and created pressure as you say.
It’s happened a handful of times, only with a specific toy, when playing solo and when I have a towel handy  My fella and I would have fun trying when together but it thankfully wasn’t an important part of our play and he stressed it didn’t matter if I did or didn’t. I never did, even though he knew some tricks to help (with magic hands ha!) and had helped other ladies we played with to gush. It didn’t feel anything like an orgasm, and I much prefer orgasms! It’s just a different sensation that feels akin to letting go and peeing in my mind! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere!
I don't either. Some guys take it as a personal insult. Don't compare yourself to other women
But I think, can’t people enjoy sex for what it is? I think especially when male orgasms and women orgasms don’t work exactly the same..
I enjoy way more sex (penetration and oral) than the final act really LOL
Absolutely this! It doesn’t mean I haven’t enjoyed it. I’m trying really hard not to compare myself to others, I’ve deleted my accounts here in the last because of how it made me feel, but I’ve been working on my confidence more lately and am determined to use the feelings it generates in a positive way x"
Exactly!! If some guy asks I always say, which is the truth! Look I might have not reached the final act but I ENJOY being fucked more (and I don’t put pressure on myself to reach it, if it happens it happens). So if they fucked amazing, I’ll tell them and I’m a happy girl!! And I got what I needed/wanted x  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere! "
It's hard to remember that there is a skewed perception here of sexuality. I don't believe what you've said isa out of the ordinary at all. |
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By *adMerWoman
over a year ago
Sandwich |
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt."
Er pee?!
Which I am sure some of the massive squirters and definitely the porn stars (saw it on a documentary) are doing.
I imagine that there is a higher percentage of women on fab that squirt than in the general population though. You do have to be incredibly relaxed and comfortable with everything for it to happen. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I think there's a lot of pressure one can potentially feel from just reading the forum. I occasionally wonder if I'm not quite like other women after reading some threads and not just because I don't squirt (what a horrible word that is). Luckily I've been around long enough to know we're all different but I feel very sad when I see that people compare themselves to others and it actually stops them meeting because they feel inadequate. .
"
Absolutely spot on. It's the need to compare, which saddens me.
I'm just happy to give and receive pleasure and have a very good time, whether it's social or sexual.
As you've said, we're old enough to know better than to conform for the sake of it but I think it isn't quite so easy for some others. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Imho, it shouldn't ever be a goal or destination tried for, if it happens, and the people involved enjoy, then amazing.
If it doesn't then you have less of a wet patch to try and cover with towels/turn the mattress (unless it's gone through) before sleep
But that sums up most of sex, enjoy the journey and not just getting there xx"
This is how it ought to be. Whatever pleasure that happens, simply enjoy it |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I find it odd, I never experienced it once until fab and thought it was fake in porn. It’s seems very common with people I meet and even people I know who didn’t squirt end up squirting when they start swinging / join fab. My theory is it’s some kind of sexual liberation switch "
That's an interesting experience and observation. Might there be something in that?
However, this would put even more 'pressure' on those who don't squirt nor are able to 'make' a woman squirt.
It would deem them to be too inhibited to do it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere!
haha people like to say how fucking great they are at sex on here mainly bollox most of the time sounds to me like your normal and what you read on here is mostly bullshit haha "
You put it so much clearer than I. I agree with you. |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
People seem to think it makes them some kind of sexual God/Goddess because they can lose fluid from their urethra.
I've had men in the past be quite forceful in trying to make it happen, and I've become very ill afterwards.
Now I know when they want it to happen and I stop them, or I pop to the loo to relieve myself.
I don't need another UTI or kidney infection. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere!
I don't either. Some guys take it as a personal insult. Don't compare yourself to other women
But I think, can’t people enjoy sex for what it is? I think especially when male orgasms and women orgasms don’t work exactly the same..
I enjoy way more sex (penetration and oral) than the final act really LOL "
Exactly this....it's the build up that's fun, isn't it? Even from the messages onwards, the flirting, all of it. Sometimes, just the spontaneity even. It's the fun before the big finale. |
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It’s an odd one.
A previous fwb could squirt. I could give her full body trembling orgasms, but no squirt, via oral
Or I could use my fingers and make her squirt
We spoke about it and the oral orgasm was actually better
But she had this fascination of being made to squirt, to the point she thought the sex wasn’t as good if she didn’t squirt.
Obviously everyone’s entitled to enjoy sex now they want, I just thought it was odd that she would make such a big deal out of something she knew didn’t bring much pleasure
It’s all a mental thing I guess |
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By *tue555Man
over a year ago
Passed Beyond Reach |
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
Er pee?!
Which I am sure some of the massive squirters and definitely the porn stars (saw it on a documentary) are doing.
I imagine that there is a higher percentage of women on fab that squirt than in the general population though. You do have to be incredibly relaxed and comfortable with everything for it to happen."
The porn industry is about imagery and pretty much all fake. Squirting is the in thing and it makes money - so like any commodity, wether it be white goods, electronics or mobile phone.
The industry is designed to make people desire something that it is must have/must do or else you'll no longer be cool. Latest phone, latest 60" Hi Res TV, squirting
Worked alongside the the porn industry for many years and what people see is not reality it is designed to create a false reality.
Some women do squirt but #notallwomen lol. But are made to feel they should else they are missing something as been intimated in other post guys have now got this idea that if you don't squirt then your with the wrong guy - and only they can sort you out.
How many threads about oral of MFF etc have guys claiming that making women squirt all over their faces. Its all bragg and BS but women are less likely to engage.
As been also said these forums don't help because they are one big pissing contest (OneUpManship) lots of the posts you can tell are pure fantasy and been taken from the latest porn vid they have watched.
Again the a false reality - it is wrong
Squirting is the latest must have now like the latest mobile
|
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"I think there's a lot of pressure one can potentially feel from just reading the forum. I occasionally wonder if I'm not quite like other women after reading some threads and not just because I don't squirt (what a horrible word that is). Luckily I've been around long enough to know we're all different but I feel very sad when I see that people compare themselves to others and it actually stops them meeting because they feel inadequate. .
Absolutely spot on. It's the need to compare, which saddens me.
I'm just happy to give and receive pleasure and have a very good time, whether it's social or sexual.
As you've said, we're old enough to know better than to conform for the sake of it but I think it isn't quite so easy for some others."
I think nearly all of us have occasions when we wonder. For instance I'm quite hairy, in places where most people think women shouldn't have hair. The language people use to describe their preference for hair on a woman can over time begin to wear you down even though it's not as in your face as some other requests.I
I know men face pressures too. The number of "is size important" threads illustrate that.
being on a site like fab could actually reinforce that everyone is different and has their own way of being and enjoying sex but the competitive element and desire to be like everyone else that a lot of people feel is carried through from real life. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It gets a bit boring sometimes when the first thing mentioned in a message to you is “are you a squirter/gusher”, and even more boring when you respond with no and they proceed to tell you that you just haven’t been fucked right and so you should meet them and they’ll have you squirting in no time.
It’s not something I look for in a man (the ability to make ladies squirt) nor is it something I feel I am missing out on, or even something I particularly want to experience.
And I find those that bang on about it in messages a major turn off.
"
This is what I've noticed. The number of mentions about squirting and gushing as if it's abnormal not to do so.
I should imagine a younger or more impressionable mind would question what's wrong with themselves if they can't perform this way. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere!
I don't either. Some guys take it as a personal insult. Don't compare yourself to other women
But I think, can’t people enjoy sex for what it is? I think especially when male orgasms and women orgasms don’t work exactly the same..
I enjoy way more sex (penetration and oral) than the final act really LOL
I wish everyone could just enjoy sex how *they* want to rather than how they think everyone else is doing it. "
That's right. Fake news is everywhere. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I can't say I've ever felt pressure to do anything. Maybe that is a reflection on how I chose who I chat to. For me it's just something that does sometimes happen. It's never a goal, and not something I often chat about with those I meet so no pressure.
I avoid anyone who sees sex as some sort of tick box competition. It's easy enough to do so I'm not sure why anyone would put themselves in a situation where they do feel pressure to do anything.
Very true. Would you say you felt the same confidence to not conform in your late teens or early twenties perhaps?
Absolutely. I didn't have sex until I met my husband when I was 20 purely because every guy I'd been involved with up to that point did something to put me off. So even then I had no desire to conform and had the confidence to say I didn't want to do something. "
That's what we can only hope for the younger generation. The constant and relentless media is a minefield. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I find it odd, I never experienced it once until fab and thought it was fake in porn. It’s seems very common with people I meet and even people I know who didn’t squirt end up squirting when they start swinging / join fab. My theory is it’s some kind of sexual liberation switch
That's an interesting experience and observation. Might there be something in that?
However, this would put even more 'pressure' on those who don't squirt nor are able to 'make' a woman squirt.
It would deem them to be too inhibited to do it."
I think I'm of the opinion that those that feel pressured into something are partially responsible for putting that pressure on themselves. They have a choice whether to worry about what others are doing or just do their own thing. I find it worrying that there are people who feel pressured into participating in a sexual act that they aren't comfortable with or feel a failure because they aren't able to do something they feel everyone else is doing. I think this is a lot down to confidence, and I think lack of confidence increases vulnerability and leads to people feeling that pressure. |
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"I find it odd, I never experienced it once until fab and thought it was fake in porn. It’s seems very common with people I meet and even people I know who didn’t squirt end up squirting when they start swinging / join fab. My theory is it’s some kind of sexual liberation switch
That's an interesting experience and observation. Might there be something in that?
However, this would put even more 'pressure' on those who don't squirt nor are able to 'make' a woman squirt.
It would deem them to be too inhibited to do it.
I think I'm of the opinion that those that feel pressured into something are partially responsible for putting that pressure on themselves. They have a choice whether to worry about what others are doing or just do their own thing. I find it worrying that there are people who feel pressured into participating in a sexual act that they aren't comfortable with or feel a failure because they aren't able to do something they feel everyone else is doing. I think this is a lot down to confidence, and I think lack of confidence increases vulnerability and leads to people feeling that pressure. "
I agree |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Apparently squirting isn't an orgasm...so men need to get over themselves...thinking they're a sex god
I've never squirted so I've zero experience of it but I have chatted to some women who do & some wish they didn't squirt
1. Cos of the mess
2. Cos the man thinks it's an orgasm & he'll stop pleasuring
Some women who squirt have also said it's peeeeeeeeee... It's clear to see from done vids that the liquid IS coming from the Urethra not the Vagina
Well said Lia Maria.
I have occasionally been a squirter and hate it.
It's an involuntary contraction of the bladder under vaginal stimulation. Consequently it's very messy as you say and some men consider it the Holy Grail of the female orgasm (it's not for me) and become fixated on it rather than the interests of their partner."
I've heard from a friend who said the same thing. She dislikes it. Your comment about it being the Holy Grail is what it seems to be becoming. The pleasure of the entire experience is forgotten about. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
But then I’m not young, and still feel the pressure to orgasm when I’m with someone new.
Your two points speaks to exactly what I feel is happening. Women who haven't or can't may feel envious of those who can when they shouldn't. It why the orgasm was created.
I generally don’t even orgasm unless I’m with my husband! It’s quite demoralising on here with all the ladies who have multiples and are squirting everywhere!
I don't either. Some guys take it as a personal insult. Don't compare yourself to other women
But I think, can’t people enjoy sex for what it is? I think especially when male orgasms and women orgasms don’t work exactly the same..
I enjoy way more sex (penetration and oral) than the final act really LOL
Absolutely this! It doesn’t mean I haven’t enjoyed it. I’m trying really hard not to compare myself to others, I’ve deleted my accounts here in the last because of how it made me feel, but I’ve been working on my confidence more lately and am determined to use the feelings it generates in a positive way x"
Good for you. It can dent your confidence here but always bear in mind that we aren't all the same and most of us aren't rude, pushy, intolerant and unkind. Most of us are no where close to being porn stars either....not even walk on extras. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Your questions are very apt OP. Until I joined Fab, I never knew what squirting was and younger guys in particular would keep asking me if I could do it which became annoying and created pressure as you say.
It’s happened a handful of times, only with a specific toy, when playing solo and when I have a towel handy My fella and I would have fun trying when together but it thankfully wasn’t an important part of our play and he stressed it didn’t matter if I did or didn’t. I never did, even though he knew some tricks to help (with magic hands ha!) and had helped other ladies we played with to gush. It didn’t feel anything like an orgasm, and I much prefer orgasms! It’s just a different sensation that feels akin to letting go and peeing in my mind! "
Your sentiments about it and the sensation of it are exactly as some friends have described it to me. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
Er pee?!
Which I am sure some of the massive squirters and definitely the porn stars (saw it on a documentary) are doing.
I imagine that there is a higher percentage of women on fab that squirt than in the general population though. You do have to be incredibly relaxed and comfortable with everything for it to happen."
I suspect that is the case also. We've simply forgotten that the statistics here may be skewed with people who are more 'highly sexed' than most in the general population. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It’s kinda amazing when it happens , it’s not a goal , it has its pluses and minuses , and it is what it is "
That is what the thinking should be. Unfortunately, the portrayal seems to be that it's something that happens when a woman reaches a heightened state of euphoria. A mere orgasm just isn't enough anymore. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Squirting is not my goal and I don't want to be involved in any way.
This site has pretty much put me off meeting anyone for sex. It's too much of a competition. Attitudes are a turn off. |
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Ok I'm putting this out there.
I don't squirt
I have hair in "unfeminine" places
I probably won't have an orgasm with anyone I don't know well
If I do have an orgasm I won't be having another that day
I definitely won't be having one via penetration
I'm post menopause so *will definitely* need lube
I'm not able to "go all night"
I do not "know what I want and how to get it"
Any person who would like to compare themselves to me and the improbably low bar that I set please feel free
P.S. The above is all true but I do not lack confidence, wish I was like other women or feel inadequate. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"People seem to think it makes them some kind of sexual God/Goddess because they can lose fluid from their urethra.
I've had men in the past be quite forceful in trying to make it happen, and I've become very ill afterwards.
Now I know when they want it to happen and I stop them, or I pop to the loo to relieve myself.
I don't need another UTI or kidney infection."
That sounds horrendous. It's the perception that getting you to orgasm isn't enough anymore. The pressure to 'fuck you right and make you squirt' seems overwhelming for some that they forget what the pleasure of sex is. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"It’s an odd one.
A previous fwb could squirt. I could give her full body trembling orgasms, but no squirt, via oral
Or I could use my fingers and make her squirt
We spoke about it and the oral orgasm was actually better
But she had this fascination of being made to squirt, to the point she thought the sex wasn’t as good if she didn’t squirt.
Obviously everyone’s entitled to enjoy sex now they want, I just thought it was odd that she would make such a big deal out of something she knew didn’t bring much pleasure
It’s all a mental thing I guess "
That's the thing, isn't it? Why would she feel she needed something less pleasurable. Is it part of the pressure to earn that merit badge? That perhaps she should be feeling ecstatic over it and if not, it can't be quite right. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
Er pee?!
Which I am sure some of the massive squirters and definitely the porn stars (saw it on a documentary) are doing.
I imagine that there is a higher percentage of women on fab that squirt than in the general population though. You do have to be incredibly relaxed and comfortable with everything for it to happen.
The porn industry is about imagery and pretty much all fake. Squirting is the in thing and it makes money - so like any commodity, wether it be white goods, electronics or mobile phone.
The industry is designed to make people desire something that it is must have/must do or else you'll no longer be cool. Latest phone, latest 60" Hi Res TV, squirting
Worked alongside the the porn industry for many years and what people see is not reality it is designed to create a false reality.
Some women do squirt but #notallwomen lol. But are made to feel they should else they are missing something as been intimated in other post guys have now got this idea that if you don't squirt then your with the wrong guy - and only they can sort you out.
How many threads about oral of MFF etc have guys claiming that making women squirt all over their faces. Its all bragg and BS but women are less likely to engage.
As been also said these forums don't help because they are one big pissing contest (OneUpManship) lots of the posts you can tell are pure fantasy and been taken from the latest porn vid they have watched.
Again the a false reality - it is wrong
Squirting is the latest must have now like the latest mobile
"
Should porn come with a warning label like on cigarette packets?
'Warning: The scenes you are about to watch are STAGED and ......' or would this be akin to the cups that say 'WARNING: The drink you are about to drink is HOT.' |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I think there's a lot of pressure one can potentially feel from just reading the forum. I occasionally wonder if I'm not quite like other women after reading some threads and not just because I don't squirt (what a horrible word that is). Luckily I've been around long enough to know we're all different but I feel very sad when I see that people compare themselves to others and it actually stops them meeting because they feel inadequate. .
Absolutely spot on. It's the need to compare, which saddens me.
I'm just happy to give and receive pleasure and have a very good time, whether it's social or sexual.
As you've said, we're old enough to know better than to conform for the sake of it but I think it isn't quite so easy for some others.
I think nearly all of us have occasions when we wonder. For instance I'm quite hairy, in places where most people think women shouldn't have hair. The language people use to describe their preference for hair on a woman can over time begin to wear you down even though it's not as in your face as some other requests.I
I know men face pressures too. The number of "is size important" threads illustrate that.
being on a site like fab could actually reinforce that everyone is different and has their own way of being and enjoying sex but the competitive element and desire to be like everyone else that a lot of people feel is carried through from real life. "
You're absolutely right. I'm short but I've never had any issues with it hence I'm not crushed when I read profiles that say 'tall men only.' I accept it because I'm not bothered by it in real life but I can imagine if I felt insecure about it, I would find it hard to remain here and see endless posts about how they love tall men.
By the same token, I would imagine any woman who were already feeling a little fragile about themselves being made to feel like one more issue they're not able to fit, it can't do their confidence any good, as a lady had mentioned in an earlier post. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I find it odd, I never experienced it once until fab and thought it was fake in porn. It’s seems very common with people I meet and even people I know who didn’t squirt end up squirting when they start swinging / join fab. My theory is it’s some kind of sexual liberation switch
That's an interesting experience and observation. Might there be something in that?
However, this would put even more 'pressure' on those who don't squirt nor are able to 'make' a woman squirt.
It would deem them to be too inhibited to do it.
I think I'm of the opinion that those that feel pressured into something are partially responsible for putting that pressure on themselves. They have a choice whether to worry about what others are doing or just do their own thing. I find it worrying that there are people who feel pressured into participating in a sexual act that they aren't comfortable with or feel a failure because they aren't able to do something they feel everyone else is doing. I think this is a lot down to confidence, and I think lack of confidence increases vulnerability and leads to people feeling that pressure.
I agree "
You're right, it boils down to confidence as with all other matters.
However, it's the perception of it being 'normal' to do this and if you're not, you aren't doing it right or are abnormal. That perception seems to prevail and it makes people question if they are 'normal' or why they can't seem to achieve it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can squirt, but only with a particular technique and angle - I can't even do it to myself. Sometimes guys get excited when I say I have squirted and expect me to do it for them, but actually if they don't know the technique for it, it won't happen. Nor is it necessary for a great time! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Squirting is not my goal and I don't want to be involved in any way.
This site has pretty much put me off meeting anyone for sex. It's too much of a competition. Attitudes are a turn off."
It's certainly skewed here but there are still quite a number of us who don't conform here.
Some of us are even happy meet without an eye on sex.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Ok I'm putting this out there.
I don't squirt
I have hair in "unfeminine" places
I probably won't have an orgasm with anyone I don't know well
If I do have an orgasm I won't be having another that day
I definitely won't be having one via penetration
I'm post menopause so *will definitely* need lube
I'm not able to "go all night"
I do not "know what I want and how to get it"
Any person who would like to compare themselves to me and the improbably low bar that I set please feel free
P.S. The above is all true but I do not lack confidence, wish I was like other women or feel inadequate. "
You sound like 99% of women, quite frankly. Thank you for your post. |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"I find it odd, I never experienced it once until fab and thought it was fake in porn. It’s seems very common with people I meet and even people I know who didn’t squirt end up squirting when they start swinging / join fab. My theory is it’s some kind of sexual liberation switch
That's an interesting experience and observation. Might there be something in that?
However, this would put even more 'pressure' on those who don't squirt nor are able to 'make' a woman squirt.
It would deem them to be too inhibited to do it.
I think I'm of the opinion that those that feel pressured into something are partially responsible for putting that pressure on themselves. They have a choice whether to worry about what others are doing or just do their own thing. I find it worrying that there are people who feel pressured into participating in a sexual act that they aren't comfortable with or feel a failure because they aren't able to do something they feel everyone else is doing. I think this is a lot down to confidence, and I think lack of confidence increases vulnerability and leads to people feeling that pressure.
I agree
You're right, it boils down to confidence as with all other matters.
However, it's the perception of it being 'normal' to do this and if you're not, you aren't doing it right or are abnormal. That perception seems to prevail and it makes people question if they are 'normal' or why they can't seem to achieve it."
It's not an achievement. It's pretty easy to do or make someone do. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I can squirt, but only with a particular technique and angle - I can't even do it to myself. Sometimes guys get excited when I say I have squirted and expect me to do it for them, but actually if they don't know the technique for it, it won't happen. Nor is it necessary for a great time!"
I wish more people could hear voices like this, especially 'nor is it necessary for a great time!' Spot on! |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"It really grinds my gears when it’s mentioned as though it’s something to aim for.
I’ve never squirted, I don’t want to. I’m not sure what the fascination is tbh.
I wonder how this would affect younger people, when it's spoken about as if it's not normal to not have one.
There must be some pressure there. Probably more than for an orgasm as you can’t fake a squirt.
Er pee?!
Which I am sure some of the massive squirters and definitely the porn stars (saw it on a documentary) are doing.
I imagine that there is a higher percentage of women on fab that squirt than in the general population though. You do have to be incredibly relaxed and comfortable with everything for it to happen.
The porn industry is about imagery and pretty much all fake. Squirting is the in thing and it makes money - so like any commodity, wether it be white goods, electronics or mobile phone.
The industry is designed to make people desire something that it is must have/must do or else you'll no longer be cool. Latest phone, latest 60" Hi Res TV, squirting
Worked alongside the the porn industry for many years and what people see is not reality it is designed to create a false reality.
Some women do squirt but #notallwomen lol. But are made to feel they should else they are missing something as been intimated in other post guys have now got this idea that if you don't squirt then your with the wrong guy - and only they can sort you out.
How many threads about oral of MFF etc have guys claiming that making women squirt all over their faces. Its all bragg and BS but women are less likely to engage.
As been also said these forums don't help because they are one big pissing contest (OneUpManship) lots of the posts you can tell are pure fantasy and been taken from the latest porn vid they have watched.
Again the a false reality - it is wrong
Squirting is the latest must have now like the latest mobile
Should porn come with a warning label like on cigarette packets?
'Warning: The scenes you are about to watch are STAGED and ......' or would this be akin to the cups that say 'WARNING: The drink you are about to drink is HOT.'"
Yes they should. There are people out there who thought 2 girls one cup was about them licking actual poop.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I've encountered women who squirt a number of times, and while I find it hot in some contexts, it's definitely not a deal-breaker for me. Moreover, I think we've reached a sad state of affairs if women are now feeling like there's pressure on them to do this. Nobody should feel pressured to do anything. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I find it odd, I never experienced it once until fab and thought it was fake in porn. It’s seems very common with people I meet and even people I know who didn’t squirt end up squirting when they start swinging / join fab. My theory is it’s some kind of sexual liberation switch
That's an interesting experience and observation. Might there be something in that?
However, this would put even more 'pressure' on those who don't squirt nor are able to 'make' a woman squirt.
It would deem them to be too inhibited to do it.
I think I'm of the opinion that those that feel pressured into something are partially responsible for putting that pressure on themselves. They have a choice whether to worry about what others are doing or just do their own thing. I find it worrying that there are people who feel pressured into participating in a sexual act that they aren't comfortable with or feel a failure because they aren't able to do something they feel everyone else is doing. I think this is a lot down to confidence, and I think lack of confidence increases vulnerability and leads to people feeling that pressure.
I agree
You're right, it boils down to confidence as with all other matters.
However, it's the perception of it being 'normal' to do this and if you're not, you aren't doing it right or are abnormal. That perception seems to prevail and it makes people question if they are 'normal' or why they can't seem to achieve it.
It's not an achievement. It's pretty easy to do or make someone do."
That would suggest people really aren't doing it 'correctly' then. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I've encountered women who squirt a number of times, and while I find it hot in some contexts, it's definitely not a deal-breaker for me. Moreover, I think we've reached a sad state of affairs if women are now feeling like there's pressure on them to do this. Nobody should feel pressured to do anything. "
Hear! Hear! It's that sentiment that they shouldn't feel pressured to do it nor the man feeling like he has somehow failed.
It's something that may and may not happen, can or cannot be achieved. It's portrayed as being absolutely achievable and something all woman should experience as a pinnacle of ecstasy. |
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