FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Who has not been to a
Who has not been to a
Jump to: Newest in thread
"If not WHY not? "
I’ve been to a few and found the treatment of single guys, both from the establishment and the people there, to be somewhat demeaning.
I’m a fairly meek and timid guy, especially in situations where I might come off as creepy. I’d much prefer to respectfully hang bank until I’m 200% certain I’m accepted.
Despite that I was treated and looked at like a wild animal and left after a short while. I dunno if I’d return to one unless it was as part of a couple |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If not WHY not?
I’ve been to a few and found the treatment of single guys, both from the establishment and the people there, to be somewhat demeaning.
I’m a fairly meek and timid guy, especially in situations where I might come off as creepy. I’d much prefer to respectfully hang bank until I’m 200% certain I’m accepted.
Despite that I was treated and looked at like a wild animal and left after a short while. I dunno if I’d return to one unless it was as part of a couple "
Awww Mr S that's rubbish, I get what your saying though. It's not for everyone
Claire |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *r.SJMan
over a year ago
Wellingborough |
"If not WHY not?
I’ve been to a few and found the treatment of single guys, both from the establishment and the people there, to be somewhat demeaning.
I’m a fairly meek and timid guy, especially in situations where I might come off as creepy. I’d much prefer to respectfully hang bank until I’m 200% certain I’m accepted.
Despite that I was treated and looked at like a wild animal and left after a short while. I dunno if I’d return to one unless it was as part of a couple "
Damn, sorry to hear that and maybe a little apprehensive now myself  I too wouldn't want to be the pushy type and possibly miss out for being unsure.
Have been and enjoyed clubs as a couple though and really want to as a single... if nothing else, I enjoy the atmosphere and feel more comfortable in a swingers club as opposed to a normal night club. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Me once the looks I got made me laugh you could see in there faces o no another single zombie was hilarious was only there dropping some stuff off I'd never go to one . |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"'swingers' club?"
I'll wait for your reply, cos you've signed out OP.....
You've got swingers club down as an interest - so have you been or want too?
Would reviews or verifications make your mind up in going or not?
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If not WHY not?
I’ve been to a few and found the treatment of single guys, both from the establishment and the people there, to be somewhat demeaning.
I’m a fairly meek and timid guy, especially in situations where I might come off as creepy. I’d much prefer to respectfully hang bank until I’m 200% certain I’m accepted.
Despite that I was treated and looked at like a wild animal and left after a short while. I dunno if I’d return to one unless it was as part of a couple "
You'd still consider swingers clubs though, seen as it's an interest you've ticked?
Or does that mean something totally different to you.....
I'm here to learn not to have a dig..... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Been once as a single guy and it wasn’t a pleasant experience, felt like an outsider from Mars.
So not not been to one properly, would be nice to go with a +1  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I guess I havnt gone yet because as a single guy it would feel like I’m an outsider, also I’m very bad at talking to new people off the bat so going up to people would be a no. So just sitting back awkwardly would be creepy to others. I think for single guys the best bet is to go with someone so it eases the tension. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I guess I havnt gone yet because as a single guy it would feel like I’m an outsider, also I’m very bad at talking to new people off the bat so going up to people would be a no. So just sitting back awkwardly would be creepy to others. I think for single guys the best bet is to go with someone so it eases the tension."
Would you go to a club with another fella?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"If not WHY not?
I’ve been to a few and found the treatment of single guys, both from the establishment and the people there, to be somewhat demeaning.
I’m a fairly meek and timid guy, especially in situations where I might come off as creepy. I’d much prefer to respectfully hang bank until I’m 200% certain I’m accepted.
Despite that I was treated and looked at like a wild animal and left after a short while. I dunno if I’d return to one unless it was as part of a couple
You'd still consider swingers clubs though, seen as it's an interest you've ticked?
Or does that mean something totally different to you.....
I'm here to learn not to have a dig....."
As my last sentence says, I’d still consider going as part of a couple |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"If not WHY not?
I’ve been to a few and found the treatment of single guys, both from the establishment and the people there, to be somewhat demeaning.
I’m a fairly meek and timid guy, especially in situations where I might come off as creepy. I’d much prefer to respectfully hang bank until I’m 200% certain I’m accepted.
Despite that I was treated and looked at like a wild animal and left after a short while. I dunno if I’d return to one unless it was as part of a couple
You'd still consider swingers clubs though, seen as it's an interest you've ticked?
Or does that mean something totally different to you.....
I'm here to learn not to have a dig.....
As my last sentence says, I’d still consider going as part of a couple "
Ahh champion |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *imbobaMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
Went (and started going again now) fairly regularly. Initially as a single (not a problem at my local club which is great) and now usually with a fwb or as a chaperone on occasions.
I guess not all clubs have the same vibe for single guys but you’ll never know until you just go for it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Went (and started going again now) fairly regularly. Initially as a single (not a problem at my local club which is great) and now usually with a fwb or as a chaperone on occasions.
I guess not all clubs have the same vibe for single guys but you’ll never know until you just go for it. "
I get what you’re saying, but ‘just going for it’ can be quite an expensive ‘suck it and see’ (excuse the pun  ) for single men.
It must take a lot of courage, from what I’ve seen on various threads. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *rad670Man
over a year ago
South Lakes |
Never been but I'm a relative newbie and wanting to experience being with a lot of like minded people, I am however apprehensive and would hate to have a negative experience, I was wondering if it would be best to find others to at least meet up with who know you are going and at least break the ice and not feel isolated all night. Not sure how I would approach a first time club visit but feel ready for one. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I guess I havnt gone yet because as a single guy it would feel like I’m an outsider, also I’m very bad at talking to new people off the bat so going up to people would be a no. So just sitting back awkwardly would be creepy to others. I think for single guys the best bet is to go with someone so it eases the tension.
Would you go to a club with another fella? "
then it’d be two single males which wouldn’t help I think but I dunno. I’d prefer going with a female as then I’d be more approachable. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I went to one a couple of weeks ago as I’ve always been intrigued. Didn’t think it would be for me and it wasn’t. Had a good laugh though with the people I went with. "
This sounds like me, I'd probably just go once just to say I tried it but I really don't think it's my kind of thing from what I've heard. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Me! Part of me is interested to see what it would be like, but on a realistic level I don’t think I’d enjoy it if I did go "
tbh I think I wouldn’t too. But I’m still intrigued in how and what goes on in there.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I haven’t been yet as I don’t have anyone to go with.
‘Riding into town solo’ in itself doesn’t bother me too much (a little though), I think I’m more concerned by how I’ll look to everyone else….”Oh FFS, another solo male  ”….which judging by some of the comments here seems entirely plausible.
A female, couple or group to go with feels like it would be better option, or meet one of those once inside the venue. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I went to one a couple of weeks ago as I’ve always been intrigued. Didn’t think it would be for me and it wasn’t. Had a good laugh though with the people I went with.
This sounds like me, I'd probably just go once just to say I tried it but I really don't think it's my kind of thing from what I've heard. "
To be fair it wasn’t as bad as I imagined. I thought people would be wondering why I was there if I didn’t want to get involved but it really wasn’t like that at all. People were really nice and it was nothing like I thought it would be  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Yeah singletons M and F have a difficult time.
If you're thinking you won't be received well, because you're on your own, I wouldn't go, it's not for you.
You have to be quite confident, chatty, vivacious to be able to gain any attention.
A bit like Fab really! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Yeah singletons M and F have a difficult time.
If you're thinking you won't be received well, because you're on your own, I wouldn't go, it's not for you.
You have to be quite confident, chatty, vivacious to be able to gain any attention.
A bit like Fab really! "
I didn’t want any attention. I think I was the quietest I’ve ever been on a night out! . I do agree though. I think it’s a totally different experience for couples x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I know 4 people who went to clubs for the first time in the last month. Two single women who had a great time and couldn't wait to go back but the couple didn't enjoy their experience.
The can tick it off their bucket list but won't be back. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yeah singletons M and F have a difficult time.
If you're thinking you won't be received well, because you're on your own, I wouldn't go, it's not for you.
You have to be quite confident, chatty, vivacious to be able to gain any attention.
A bit like Fab really!
I didn’t want any attention. I think I was the quietest I’ve ever been on a night out! . I do agree though. I think it’s a totally different experience for couples x"
There's a guy above our posts, who's talking about not being received well if he went....
I'm throwing my post into the mix for those who haven't been....
It's not all great shakes at clubs - it's just I never see any positive, until you came along!
Thank fuck for that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago
Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands |
Me
As an 81 year old singleton I cannot imagine that I would derive much pleasure from going to a club.
Being quite honest it is not really my thing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Yeah singletons M and F have a difficult time.
If you're thinking you won't be received well, because you're on your own, I wouldn't go, it's not for you.
You have to be quite confident, chatty, vivacious to be able to gain any attention.
A bit like Fab really!
I didn’t want any attention. I think I was the quietest I’ve ever been on a night out! . I do agree though. I think it’s a totally different experience for couples x
There's a guy above our posts, who's talking about not being received well if he went....
I'm throwing my post into the mix for those who haven't been....
It's not all great shakes at clubs - it's just I never see any positive, until you came along!
Thank fuck for that "
I can imagine it’s really difficult for single men. There seemed to be a lot sort of hanging around not knowing what to do with themselves. It was apparently a quieter night than normal when I went though. Word must have got round that I was going x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *imbobaMan
over a year ago
Glasgow |
"Went (and started going again now) fairly regularly. Initially as a single (not a problem at my local club which is great) and now usually with a fwb or as a chaperone on occasions.
I guess not all clubs have the same vibe for single guys but you’ll never know until you just go for it.
I get what you’re saying, but ‘just going for it’ can be quite an expensive ‘suck it and see’ (excuse the pun ) for single men.
It must take a lot of courage, from what I’ve seen on various threads. "
God I was nervous the first time but still had a good experience. Over time you build up friendships and get to know the staff too.
Your right - it can be expensive for a single guy but once you know people you can go as a couple (split entry) and the club I go to is byob so there’s a saving there vs a nightclub.
Clubs are not going to suit many. As mentioned you do need to put the effort in to socialise and have some confidence. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I haven't. I'm intrigued but I'm a scaredy. I wouldn't want to do anything in front of anyone either... if I even had the chance.
I'd be your chaperone. "
You'll have to hold my hand and drag me in when I have 2nd thoughts |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago
Maldon and Peterborough |
"I haven't. I'm intrigued but I'm a scaredy. I wouldn't want to do anything in front of anyone either... if I even had the chance.
I'd be your chaperone.
You'll have to hold my hand and drag me in when I have 2nd thoughts "
I'll throw you over my shoulder if I have too. Xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Me.....i think as single guy its just crossing the door then ill be fine......but it feels like a parachute jump when i think about going alone....plus... you hear lots about single guys being a bit creepy and i would hate to be tarred with that brush |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I’ve not been to one but I’m hoping to change that soon. I’m a bit nervous though, as I’d be going on my own and while I’m not expecting to be invited to play (to avoid disappointment) I’m still feeling self conscious about being a chunky guy in that environment. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Never been but I'm a relative newbie and wanting to experience being with a lot of like minded people, I am however apprehensive and would hate to have a negative experience, I was wondering if it would be best to find others to at least meet up with who know you are going and at least break the ice and not feel isolated all night. Not sure how I would approach a first time club visit but feel ready for one. "
There’s a Leeds social this weekend and some will go off to a club afterwards so a social event then club could be the way forward as it’ll give you chance to chat to people and get to know them.
Look for organised socials 
K |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ookie46Woman
over a year ago
Deepest darkest Peru |
I’ve been to clubs as a single lady and a couple and never had a bad experience yet. In fact my first ever visit to a club I was the only lady there!
Looking forward to visiting Pandora’s for the first time this week |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Going to a club as a single female and as a single Male is totally different. It’s a lot harder for guys to go in and make friends etc. I really want to but just see all the single men saying they didn’t feel welcomed puts me off. Sucks it’s like that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I’ve never been to one, mainly because the nearest to me is about 2 1/2 hours drive away, and that’s a long way to go if you’re going solo for your first club experience. Circumstances have meant that I’ve only been able to attend socials recently so I’m going to see how they go and maybe commit to a club in future…
Do they have bring a friend nights where people can bring newbies along? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
This is the reason I haven’t been. The thought of going and what could happen is a big draw. But the thought of not knowing how I’ll be accepted as a single guy and the thought of being left on my own like a lemon and the not knowing the etiquette or what to do puts me off and I why I haven’t been before |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I’ve not but am interested
But as said above being a single male I like to sit back take in the vibe and get a feel for the club. BUT this would be seen as creepy which I don’t want!
Once I’m happy I’ll chat and joke with anyone
Also well look at me! I’m not what others will want in their club so it would be like I need to leave, great that was a total waste of money and I now feel like shit!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Not yet, for several years we used fab only to meet singles males for mmf but have more recently expanded our horizons and will definitely go, at the first opportunity we get! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Going to a club as a single female and as a single Male is totally different. It’s a lot harder for guys to go in and make friends etc. I really want to but just see all the single men saying they didn’t feel welcomed puts me off. Sucks it’s like that. "
Yeah don't go Alex it's not for you. Don't rely upon finding someone to hold your hand, if its difficult to converse on here...... 
Enjoy fab! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Going to a club as a single female and as a single Male is totally different. It’s a lot harder for guys to go in and make friends etc. I really want to but just see all the single men saying they didn’t feel welcomed puts me off. Sucks it’s like that.
Yeah don't go Alex it's not for you. Don't rely upon finding someone to hold your hand, if its difficult to converse on here......
Enjoy fab!"
Thanks... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *mily36CWoman
over a year ago
. (or anywhere beginning with B..!?) |
Clubs overseas can be less intimidating than ours here as they are more open to the lifestyle anyway ...especially Germany, or try ones in Spain when you can, they have the weather |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
