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single parents
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does anyone else have this issue being a single mum i find it hard to have meets as oftern as i like.
i refuse to bring anyone here just coz i cant get a sitter, i wont have anyone random just come over.
i get a lot of pushy people saying oh ILL be quite etc it just annoys me i say i have rules in place and people ask me to break them, is it fair im a mum first and a women second it`s a safety thing i wont break my rules
does anyone else have this issue or am i the only one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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nope i get the same all the time. I have rules and its all clearly put on my profile. If a man even suggests coming here when she is asleep they get the message deleted.. if messages persist than a block.
Im not changing for no one. I will not put my needs before the safety of my child |
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agreed if i have meet some one socially a few times then it different i have meet a few people who are now regular fb and my son is aware mummy had friends but i wouldn't have some one else come at all here just getting frustrated by people pushing luck even tho i have said so beore and on profile as well
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've heard the "Oh I will be quiet" Or "I'll cover your mouth with my hand to stop you screaming" is another one or another is "Just let me come over so you can blow me and then I'll leave"
I just ignore it block and delete and laugh at their desperation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This one really winds me up too it clearly states that I can meet at short notice due to family commitments n I still constant messages from pushy people tryin their luck |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
I have to ask.......
Why tell them you are single with kids in the house?
You don't need to explain why you don't accommodate or why you are not free to just meet on a whim...
If people can't accept that you have a life with/without children that is their problem!
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"I have to ask.......
Why tell them you are single with kids in the house?
You don't need to explain why you don't accommodate or why you are not free to just meet on a whim...
If people can't accept that you have a life with/without children that is their problem!
"
coz I'm too honest for my own good |
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I'm single and a parent, although my son spends one week with Mrs ex-_arambar, but there's no way on earth I'd ever meet whilst he's with me and therefore I'd never expect someone to meet me whilst they were looking after their child(ren). |
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i wish all people were like you guys understanding i shouldn't have to explain i know but was brought up to be polite so i try to explain there is a genuine reason but people can be so rude and pushy even tho profile states not pushy but when you say sorry cant do it they put the pressure on more
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"does anyone else have this issue being a single mum i find it hard to have meets as oftern as i like.
i refuse to bring anyone here just coz i cant get a sitter, i wont have anyone random just come over.
i get a lot of pushy people saying oh ILL be quite etc it just annoys me i say i have rules in place and people ask me to break them, is it fair im a mum first and a women second it`s a safety thing i wont break my rules
does anyone else have this issue or am i the only one "
no, ive had it many times when guys have asked to come here and when i say no because i have kids they say they will come after they have gone to bed, my kids are 18 and 20 ffs when do i know when they will go to bed? but they are still my kids regardless of their age and i respect them and their home to much to be bringing men back here while they are in, tho some guys seem to think because they are adults its ok to fuck strangers while they are in
Just tell them to f**k off, to be honest i find it insulting that some people think all because your on here you have no morals and will do anything for a shag including putting your kids in danger, it just shows what little opinion they hold of women on here and im quite happy to tell them thats how i feel |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"does anyone else have this issue being a single mum i find it hard to have meets as oftern as i like.
i refuse to bring anyone here just coz i cant get a sitter, i wont have anyone random just come over.
i get a lot of pushy people saying oh ILL be quite etc it just annoys me i say i have rules in place and people ask me to break them, is it fair im a mum first and a women second it`s a safety thing i wont break my rules
does anyone else have this issue or am i the only one "
Stick to your guns - both Perky and I have had families 9still got hers!) and we would NEVER either have anyone back if kids of ANY age are in the house, or go to anyones who has kids in theirs. Had to explain in very plain language to one younger couple on here why we would not meet them at theirs under any circumstances all the time their three kids (all under 5) were asleep upstairs!! Makes you wonder what is going on in their heads...?
It's not just single parents who have the problem, and it's not just one way either...
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The only time i met when my son lived with me was when he was at his fathers. Wouldnt even meet when he was at his mums, children come before swinging in my opinion and yest i did have meets but if you have children in my case swinging had to take a back seat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Kids come first. Always. If someone can't understand that you don't want them in your house when the sproglets are home then they aren't worth knowing. Don't feel bad about it. Unless you know the person well, you would be inviting into your house someone who is, in effect, a complete stranger.
And don't explain. All you need to say is that you can't accommodate. It's no ones business but your own as to why. By explaining you give them the chance to say 'but what if...'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've heard the "Oh I will be quiet" Or "I'll cover your mouth with my hand to stop you screaming" is another one or another is "Just let me come over so you can blow me and then I'll leave"
I just ignore it block and delete and laugh at their desperation."
seriously? i think that really inconsiderate and damn rude.
id never dream of sending a message like that. just terrible manners. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Kids come first. Always. If someone can't understand that you don't want them in your house when the sproglets are home then they aren't worth knowing. Don't feel bad about it. Unless you know the person well, you would be inviting into your house someone who is, in effect, a complete stranger.
And don't explain. All you need to say is that you can't accommodate. It's no ones business but your own as to why. By explaining you give them the chance to say 'but what if...'."
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"The desperation for some people to have meets at any cost is quite shocking.
Its only nsa sex, its hardly a life and death must have situation. " I have to agree with you on this, its never ceases to amaze me the risks and situations some put themselves in. Not always their fault but only recently i have been shocked by this kinda thing. |
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By *vana sukalotWoman
over a year ago
In a land of make believe (Derby) |
"I have a son at home, nosy neighbours and don't want anyone in my home. My home my rules no compromise. "
I'm exactly the same, I live in an area where everyone knows each other and I like to keep my other life secret, and most importantly my children safe. |
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I am in agreement with all of the comments on this posting, apart from the title. Even a couple with children should think about the kids first. Whether the kids are young or old would the parents be comfortable knowing that at any moment the kid(s( could hear something get up and wander through and find mummy/daddy naked with a strange man/woman.
I don't think I would be comfortable either knowing there is kids in the house, I know I lose the urge very quickly when I hear doors opening and footsteps outside when shy and I are having fun alone, but then it's teenagers we have.
Can't accommodate or can only accommodate during daytime etc means just that and if the others involved don't respect that can you really trust them anywhere near your home? As mentioned earlier if they are that pushy and do not listen there is the magical block button and then you can move on to a more willing and understanding single/couple.
Fly ?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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well my kids are now in their twenties and both live away....they both know their dad has a wild side but when they chose to visit....kids still come first! so why would it be any different for a younger child! rules are rules! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"nope i get the same all the time. I have rules and its all clearly put on my profile. If a man even suggests coming here when she is asleep they get the message deleted.. if messages persist than a block.
Im not changing for no one. I will not put my needs before the safety of my child"
Nans get the same as I was babysitting my 5 week old daughter on Thursday night and a guy asked if I wanted some company, I thought he meant chatting online but he actually meant coming over to mine! Instant block Would never play where there are kids around |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"well my kids are now in their twenties and both live away....they both know their dad has a wild side but when they chose to visit....kids still come first! so why would it be any different for a younger child! rules are rules!"
Same here as both mine have a key to my house, son lives here in between staying at exes as they have a child together, easier and safer to say that I cannot accommodate |
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see my problem is being a single mum i dont get to have sitters often so my meets are ether pre planned weeks in advance or during day time when son not about and im not working which i s rarest ast times i do have a fb and son has meet him not like hi this x but this mummy friend i have sat him down before and asked can mu m have a man friend over and his response was do you have lady friends over if you do it ok bless him the innocence is sweet
but i don understand that with couples and children it is slightly easier to have the time for meets |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not just single parents.....its every parent....would never go play when kids there and never accom when mine r home...my only play time at home is during school holidays cos my kids go to my parents....think its very wrong if kids in house no matter what age they are... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't see any difference between being a single parent or having both parents when it comes to this issue.
I also don't understand why anyone would feel the need to explain saying no to such a request. It has nothing to do with politeness or being honest, if you were saying no to a session of watersports would you feel the need to explain? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not just single parents.....its every parent....would never go play when kids there and never accom when mine r home...my only play time at home is during school holidays cos my kids go to my parents....think its very wrong if kids in house no matter what age they are..."
I think it's disrespectful for people to ask anyone to do something they clearly say they don't/ won't/ can't. I don't accomodate, I won't travel far, I can't meet often. If people don't like that, they can easily find someone else. |
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By *Ryan-Man
over a year ago
In Your Bush |
"Not just single parents.....its every parent....would never go play when kids there and never accom when mine r home...my only play time at home is during school holidays cos my kids go to my parents....think its very wrong if kids in house no matter what age they are...
I think it's disrespectful for people to ask anyone to do something they clearly say they don't/ won't/ can't. I don't accomodate, I won't travel far, I can't meet often. If people don't like that, they can easily find someone else. "
Especially at your age Scarlet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't see any difference between being a single parent or having both parents when it comes to this issue.
I also don't understand why anyone would feel the need to explain saying no to such a request. It has nothing to do with politeness or being honest, if you were saying no to a session of watersports would you feel the need to explain? "
i tend to agree, even if i was still married i still wouldnt have people here but to me the main difference to me on this is if i invited a guy to my house and i was single and the guy turned out to be a nutter the chances are, as much as id try i wouldnt be able to over power him there for me and my children would be in danger, if i was a couple the chances are the out come would be totally different because as much as us women like to think we are 'stong' when it comes to fighting off a guy another man stands a better chance |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't see any difference between being a single parent or having both parents when it comes to this issue.
I also don't understand why anyone would feel the need to explain saying no to such a request. It has nothing to do with politeness or being honest, if you were saying no to a session of watersports would you feel the need to explain?
i tend to agree, even if i was still married i still wouldnt have people here but to me the main difference to me on this is if i invited a guy to my house and i was single and the guy turned out to be a nutter the chances are, as much as id try i wouldnt be able to over power him there for me and my children would be in danger, if i was a couple the chances are the out come would be totally different because as much as us women like to think we are 'stong' when it comes to fighting off a guy another man stands a better chance "
I appreciate your point but would suggest that if the thrust of the thread was about personal safety then we would be discussing all single women as opposed to single parents. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not just single parents.....its every parent....would never go play when kids there and never accom when mine r home...my only play time at home is during school holidays cos my kids go to my parents....think its very wrong if kids in house no matter what age they are...
I think it's disrespectful for people to ask anyone to do something they clearly say they don't/ won't/ can't. I don't accomodate, I won't travel far, I can't meet often. If people don't like that, they can easily find someone else.
Especially at your age Scarlet"
I do alright..... |
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From the other side I have been in the situation where I have played with someone not knowing their kids were in the house.
Now I'm not exactly quiet when having sex
When we had finished I used the facilities and as I'm sat on the loo in walks a kid about 10 years old.........very awkward!!!!! |
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"I don't see any difference between being a single parent or having both parents when it comes to this issue.
I also don't understand why anyone would feel the need to explain saying no to such a request. It has nothing to do with politeness or being honest, if you were saying no to a session of watersports would you feel the need to explain? "
I struggle to understand why people feel it "polite" to justify their rules then moan about it when others don't respect them.
Anyone trying to dictate how I conduct my business is ignoed and blocked - no angst, no problem. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
You don't need to explain why you don't accommodate or why you are not free to just meet on a whim...
"
and yet many (if not the majority) expect single guys to do exactly the opposite
by that, i mean explain why they can't accom
i've seen it time and again when guys have asked for profile advice
things like 'maybe a line on why you can't accom' and so on
(i can and do accom btw, just being devils advocate) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've heard the "Oh I will be quiet" Or "I'll cover your mouth with my hand to stop you screaming" is another one or another is "Just let me come over so you can blow me and then I'll leave"
I just ignore it block and delete and laugh at their desperation.
seriously? i think that really inconsiderate and damn rude.
id never dream of sending a message like that. just terrible manners."
Honestly I kid you not. But I just laughed at the pathetic desperation. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I have to ask.......
Why tell them you are single with kids in the house?
You don't need to explain why you don't accommodate or why you are not free to just meet on a whim...
If people can't accept that you have a life with/without children that is their problem!
"
I made the mistake of telling someone I lived with my daughter and he suggested a threesome. BLOCK!
Now I don't say a word. I have that I can't accommodate on my profile (in capitals too) so it's tough tits if they want to come over. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On another site a young mother with a two year old child used to spend all day and all night on the forums and meet in the day."
And? If she felt that was okay. I am often on here when kids are around although only on my phone.
And I meet when kids are asleep from time to time. It works for us and it does say clearly on our profile.
I think with all things be honest and stick to what you are comfortable with.
Cali |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
You don't need to explain why you don't accommodate or why you are not free to just meet on a whim...
and yet many (if not the majority) expect single guys to do exactly the opposite
by that, i mean explain why they can't accom
i've seen it time and again when guys have asked for profile advice
things like 'maybe a line on why you can't accom' and so on
(i can and do accom btw, just being devils advocate)"
I can only accommodate when my kids are not here on (3 days/week). I've been told a couple of times that this is "what timewasting blokes say when they're hiding a relationship".
Kids come first for dads too! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"On another site a young mother with a two year old child used to spend all day and all night on the forums and meet in the day.
And? If she felt that was okay. I am often on here when kids are around although only on my phone.
And I meet when kids are asleep from time to time. It works for us and it does say clearly on our profile.
I think with all things be honest and stick to what you are comfortable with.
Cali" I.m sure there must have been enough hours in the evening when her child was in bed to talk about sex with strangers all day...but everyone to their own. |
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